A long way to go

Jul 30, 2017 09:44

Author: NYWCgirl
Fandom: White Collar
Pairing: none
Characters: Neal, Peter, Mozzie, June, El
Warning: none
Spoilers: none
Rating: Gen
Genre: hurt/comfort, major injury, head trauma, medication
Author's Notes: This fic fills the ‘Medication’ square on my H/C Bingo card and is part of the ‘It changed me’ verse, you can find the other stories here: Canon in D and Wandering.

Word Count: ~ 2800

Disclaimer: Characters are not mine…
Summary: Neal is been shot in the head protecting Peter. The wait in the hospital is long and there are no guarantees how Neal will come out of this..

Story can also be found on AO3.



Peter paces the surgical waiting room. It has been hours since Neal is taken into surgery to repair the damage the bullet has inflicted. Diana went out to get some decent coffee. Peter would have preferred that El was here, but she is visiting her parents and he doesn’t want to disturb her visit. He knows she would try to get back to the city as soon as possible. And as long as they don´t know anything it is better that she enjoys her visit. June is sitting in a chair reading the papers the nurse handed Peter when Neal was taken into the ER. She has a pen in her hand and scribbles down some things.
‘Peter, it asks here if Neal is allergic to certain substances.’
She looks up when he doesn´t answers immediately. Her gaze tells him to relax. She gestures to the chair next to her. He sits down with a sigh.
‘Yeah. Neal is allergic to morphine and shellfish.’
She jots it down. When she is done, she brings the papers back to the nurses´ station. She comes back but doesn´t sit down.
‘You want some coffee? The nurse just said it may take a while.’
Peter looks unsure, but eventually nods. June is right, it can take hours before they are done and the adrenaline rush is crashing, leaving him exhausted.
‘Thanks.’
‘You are welcome, let´s go, I know a great place. The little perks when you have done so many vigils as I have.’
Peter nods, he sometimes forgets that June has done her fair share of comforting sick people in this hospital.
They leave the hospital and across the block, there is this cozy little coffee place. June orders them coffee and some Danish. They will need the sugar.
‘Is Elizabeth coming?’
‘No, she is visiting her family. I didn´t want to disturb her visit.’
‘Understandingly. But who is taking care of Satchmo?’
Peter rolls his eyes, how could he forget Satchmo? Simple, because normally El takes care of such things.
‘Why don´t you bring him over to my place. Bugsy likes a play mate. Go home, take a shower and get into something more comfortable. I will stay here. Maria is working, I will give her a call that you are dropping off Satchmo.’
‘That would be great. Thank you.’
‘Go on, I will call you if something changes.’

* * *

When Peter enters the waiting area, June is not there. He walks up to the nurses’ desk.
‘I´m looking for Neal Caffrey.’
‘Are you agent Burke?’
‘Yes.’
‘Misses Ellington asked me to tell you she went to take care of some administration here at the hospital, she will be right back.’
‘Is there news?’
She smiles. ‘Yes, Neal is out of surgery and in recovery. I estimate he will be there for about an hour before he is transferred to the ICU.’
‘Thank you, that is good news.’
Peter goes back down to buy a newspaper and a cross word puzzle booklet. A weight is lifted from his shoulders. Neal made it through surgery.
He is waiting and reading the newspaper when June joins them.
‘All set?’
‘Yes, and again. Thank you June, this is very generous of you.’
‘That is what family does.’ She puts her hand on his knee. We need to take care of ourselves so we can take care of Neal. Does Mozzie know?’
‘I left a message through Neal´s telephone.’
‘That will be sufficient, he will be here.’
‘Family of Neal Caffrey?’
Both Peter and June look up.
‘How is he?’
‘My name is doctor Beck, I was Mister Caffrey´s surgeon. There were no complications during surgery and mister Caffrey is now being looked after in recovery. We were able to repair the damage and we are cautiously optimistic. Since mister Caffrey hasn´t regained consciousness here in the hospital we will have to wait until he wakes before we can access his condition.’
‘Can we see him?’
‘Mister Caffrey is transferred to the ICU while we speak. You can contact the duty nurse. But visiting hours are kept to a minimum.’
‘Thank you.’
June and Peter follow the signs to the ICU.
When they enter, they can see the hustle and bustle when Neal is settled in his room. Two nurses are connecting all of the equipment, wires and tubes are straightened. It all looks very professional and in between it all, Neal is still, pale, and it is eerie, it is so un-like Neal. Most of his head is obscured by a large white bandage, a tube sprouts from it.
‘Can I help you?’ one of the nurses asks.
‘Agent Peter Burke and this is June Ellington, we are here for Neal Caffrey.’
‘OK, welcome in the ICU. As you can see, mister Caffrey is being settled in. We do have a strict visitor policy. Only one visitor at a time and no longer than 15 minutes.’
‘I understand, but would it be OK if I just see him now. He is my partner and he was shot protecting me. I just want to see him for a minute.’
The nurse seems to understand his need to see him and she agrees as long as he makes it quick.
Peter looks at June, but she is already gesturing to go inside. He enters the room and is a bit overwhelmed by all the equipment.
‘Why don´t I explain some of the equipment? It can be a bit much to see a loved one like this.’
‘Thanks. Is he in pain?’
‘No, he is being kept in a medical induced coma to allow his brain time to heal.’
‘Why is he on a ventilator?’
‘That is a precaution. We want to make sure his brain gets enough oxygen to heal.’
Peter nods. It all sounds very pessimistic to him. He mentally shakes himself before his mind takes him to dark places.
‘You can talk to him.’ The nurse gently reminds him.
‘Hey Neal, we are here. You are in hospital but they are taking good care of you.’
Peter rubs Neal´s arm.
‘I´m sorry agent Burke, but I need to ask you to leave and come back during visiting hours.’
Peter nods.
‘Neal, I need to go now, but I will be here during visiting hours; Rest, heal and come back to us.’

* * *

Over the days, Mozzie, El, June and Peter keep vigil by Neal. The White Collar team asked to visit, but as long as Neal is in the ICU, the visitor limit applies, so Peter asked them to be patient.
Peter enters Neal´s room and he studies Neal. The bruising on his face is slowly fading They shaved him, but his hair is greasy and lank. Neal wouldn´t approve. Two days ago the drain was removed so Peter goes in search of a nurse.
‘Is there a possibility to wash Neal´s hair?’
She smile, ‘we do wash his hair with dry shampoo.’
‘Still, he would prefer a real wash.’
‘I understand agent Burke, but we are limited in time and our priority is to provide medical care in this unit.’
Peter is ready to answer but the nurse interrupts him.
‘However, we do understand the need for family to do something useful for their family members. Would you be comfortable to wash his hair if we explain how to?’
Peter is caught off guard. Would he?
‘Can my wife be present? I would be more comfortable if we were together.’
‘Of course.’
‘OK, let me get her so she can hear the instructions as well.’
‘I will start the preparations.’
Peter returns with El and they ready themselves explaining to Neal what they are going to do. The nurse has put Neal´s head in a special basin that drains off to a bucket next to the bed. She gives them plastic aprons and explains the procedure. She shows them how to avoid the healing wound and after double checking the water temperature she gives the go ahead.
Peter explains to Neal that he will cover Neal´s face with a towel, rationally he knows Neal is still out but he doesn´t want Neal to be scared. Next El gently pours water over his hair. It is Peter who massages Neal´s scalp with shampoo and afterwards with conditioner.
When they are done El gently brushes Neal´s hair in style while Peter cleans up the supplies.
Even though Neal is not aware according to the doctors, Peter is convinced Neal feels a lot better. The
doctors are talking about tapering down Neal´s sedation in an attempt to wake him up. Since Peter is his medical proxy he needs to sign all sorts of papers which he gladly does. Everything to get Neal back to them.
The medication is tapered down, but Neal doesn´t wake up like Peter had expected. The doctors tell him to be patient, that Neal will wake up when he is ready.
It turns out Neal is ready in the middle of the night.
Peter is awakened by his telephone, it is Neal´s night nurse telling him Neal is rousing and they think it would be good if he would be there. Peter agrees, gets dressed and drives to the hospital.
It is quiet when he enters the hospital through the night entrance and proceeds to the ICU. When he enters the ward, he can hear the quiet huffs and beeps from the different medical equipment. Since the rooms are open, Peter can see a nurse talking to Neal. He enters the room, expecting to see Neal awake but is disappointed to see his eyes closed.
‘Good morning agent Burke, Neal here is waking up. I think it will be comforting to hear a familiar voice.’
‘Hi Neal, good of you to wake up, we have been waiting for you. You have slept long enough.’
Peter can see Neal´s face is no longer slack, there is tension.
‘You’re going to be OK, you are in hospital, but we are here.’
He squeezes Neal´s hand in case Neal can´t hear him. He settles next to Neal´s bed and starts telling about his week. Somewhere during the night, alarms beep. Neal grimaces and his limbs spam and jerk. It is clear Neal is doing his best to wake up.
At six in the morning the night nurse comes to say goodbye and to reassure Neal. Ten minutes later the day nurse comes to check up on Neal.
Morning rounds are uneventful. Neal is completely still during the doctor´s visit. He orders a new MRI to check the swelling in Neal´s head.
Peter goes out for breakfast while Neal´s is being cared after. He calls Diana to ask her to bring his laptop and some files, since he is planning to stay with Neal today.
When he enters the room, there is some commotion, alarms are going off.
‘It is OK, Peter, come closer, I think you can give Neal more peace of mind. He is doing very well, but is a bit distressed.
‘Neal, I´m here. You’re OK. I know this is scary, but everything is going to be OK.’
Neal´s heart rate decreases enough to stop the alarm.
‘You are doing good, buddy.’
‘We are going to take you for an MRI, Neal, so you will feel the bed move, but it is OK. Agent Burke will go with you.’
‘Yes Neal, I will be right with you.’
Neal is prepared for the trip to the MRI. Once they are there, Neal is fitted with ear protection that is connected with a radio.
‘You can talk to Neal, agent Burke.’
‘Neal , they are taking you into the MRI machine, you are doing great. It will be over soon.’
The machine starts up but the technician draws his attention.
‘Agent Burke, please talk to Neal, he is trying to move and we need him to lay still. Otherwise we will need to restrain him.’
‘Neal? I need you to lay still, can you do that for me? It won´t be much longer. Tell you what? When you are allowed, I will ask El to make you gelato, your favorite, pistachio.’
The technician gives Peter a thumbs up.
‘I understood Mozzie was here to visit you. June was over as well yesterday and the office sent over balloons and cards. You are quite popular. We had to put restrictions on the amount of visitors.’
‘We’re done.’
‘Neal, they are done. We are going back to your room.’
During the transport, Neal´s movements become more deliberate.
‘Neal, come on, you can do it. Can you open your eyes?’
Peter can see Neal is really trying but it seems like he can´t get over the last hurdle. Peter has an idea and calls Mozzie. Ever since Neal is in the hospital, he picks up when Peter calls. Peter explains the situation and Mozzie promises to come as quickly as possible.
Peter keeps encouraging Neal and within the hour Mozzie walks in with weird movies. June brings by her favorite coffee and El brings one of their heirloom quilts that Peter always uses when he is sick. It has the Burkes scent on it. The doctor allows them all to stay as long as they don´t disturb the other patients. It is clear that everybody in the room cares and wants what is best for Neal.
Neal seems to struggle to surface, especially since they brought in the stimuli. The small group sends Peter to get some food and coffee and they take turns keeping Neal company. They are deciding what they are going to do for dinner, when Elizabeth suddenly gasps.
‘Neal!’
All eyes turn towards Neal, who has his eyes open. Little slits of blue can be seen.
‘You’re awake. Push the call button.’
A nurse enters the room and smiles when she sees Neal awake.
‘Good to see you with us mister Caffrey. How are you feeling?’
Peter´s heart clenches when Neal doesn´t react at all.
‘The doctor will be in soon. You are doing good Neal. Just try to relax.’
It worries Peter that he doesn´t even fight the ventilator.
When the doctor enters, they are asked to leave the room and to wait outside. The group moves towards the waiting area.
Half an hour later, the doctor joins them.
‘The papers states that agent Burke is Mister Caffrey´s medical proxy. Can we talk?’
‘I´m sure Neal would want all of his family to know about his condition.’
‘Very well. Like you witnessed yourselves, mister Caffrey regained consciousness.’
‘Neal. He prefers to be called Neal.’
The doctor nods.
‘I examined Neal and although he is conscious. I would prefer to call it minimal consciousness. But since he seems to be able to breathe on his own, I would like to remove the ventilator and see how he does on his own. Do you have any questions at this point? Hopefully we can tell you more once he is more aware. We are also changing his meds to see if that can help.’
‘No questions at the moment. Thank you.’
‘A nurse will come to get you once we have Neal settled.’
The doctor leaves and everybody sits back down. Half an hour later, there is still no sign of a nurse and Peter worries.
‘He will be OK, hon.’
‘I know, but…’
‘Caffrey family?’
‘Yes.’
‘Follow me please. Mister Caffrey did very well and is breathing on his own.’
They follow the nurse and cramp themselves into Neal´s room. They are all disappointed when Neal´s eyes are closed.
‘The examination took a lot out of him. Let him rest, he is doing well. Everybody settles into the room and waits. It doesn´t take very long before Neal stirs. His eyes open to slits but there is a confused look on his face.
‘Hi Neal, you’re in hospital.’
Neal does his best to look at the voice but it is obviously difficult. His mouth moves slowly but no sound escapes.
‘You’re doing good Neal, but you need to rest.’
Peter rubs the arm without IV´s. Slowly Neal´s eyes close again and his breathing evens out.

* * *

Neal ´s recovery doesn´t go as fast as everybody had hoped. The doctors are getting more cautious in their predictions on Neal´s recovery.
Neal sleeps a lot, which is good according to the doctors. But when he is awake, he is sometimes confused and disoriented and that makes him agitated. They established that he is aware of his condition, which makes it only harder on Neal but also on Peter, whose guilt is eating him.
Over time Neal is able to stay awake for longer periods of time. The confusion is better since they changed Neal´s medication. But his speech is severely affected and it frustrates Neal to no end. The doctors have started up all sorts of therapy.
Progress is slow, but it is there and Neal will get better, they are all convinced of that.

head inury, whumpee neal, gunshot wound, hurt/comfort, h/c bingo round 8

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