Sounds Familyre (XI)
Still, Emanuel displays many characteristics of a hypomanic temperament. This mildly manic disposition-which is not a mental illness-comes with assets that could propel someone to the top of his field: immense energy, drive, confidence, creativity, and infectious enthusiasm. . . . But it also carries a cluster of liabilities: overconfidence, irritability, and especially impulsivity that often pitches the hypomanic into hostility. Drives are heightened and impulse control is weakened, making the hypomanic brain like a Porsche with no brakes. In keeping with his hypomanic temperament, Emanuel doesn't need much sleep and he can't stay still. "He's like a shark that always has to keep moving or he dies," says John Lapp, who worked for Emanuel. And, like Clinton, Emanuel is highly creative, not least because his hyperkinetic mind can't stop generating ideas. "He's an idea machine," Sabato says.
-- John Gartner, "Field Guide to the Hypomanic: Hothead of State"
A while ago a friend half-seriously suggested I might be the elusive unipolar hypomanic. There are two responses to this that occurred to me -- one being "don't they just call that ADHD?", and the other being "don't be fooled, you're getting a biased sample". By definition, people see and hear less of me when I'm in shut-in (and/or shut-down) mode. But only recently did it occur to me that examining my behavior through a cyclothymic lens might be worthwhile.
What kept me from considering it is simply that it's been a long time since I've experienced anything I'd call a major depressive episode that wasn't attributable to SAD. One unexpected benefit of going on a low-carb diet is that the SAD has improved dramatically, and at this point I genuinely feel like depression is a problem I've more or less left behind. But what this has enabled me to notice is that I have a different kind of bipolarity: instead of oscillating between periods of mania and depression, it's hypomania and anxiety.
I conceptualize this as mapping to the relative dominance of dopaminergic vs. adrenergic signaling going on between my ears, which is affected by numerous other contextual factors. The question is how much of this is "intrinsic" to my temperament and how much it can be moderated by different habits. I've got ample evidence that it's hereditary, so it would be wise to just consider it part of my temperament, but temperament can be trained.
Here's a manic/panic cycle I find myself in a lot: find something really interesting that confers a sense of reward and run with it (manic), then freak out because while I've been doing that something else I've been neglecting has crept up on me (panic). It seems this could be short-circuited by regularly being reminded what my priorities are, or by setting up my environment in such a way that I'm regularly rewarded for doing things that are in my long-term interest, but this has proven to be a tricky problem. I'm going to need to do a lot more thinking-out-loud about this in the near future.
-- John Gartner, "Field Guide to the Hypomanic: Hothead of State"
A while ago a friend half-seriously suggested I might be the elusive unipolar hypomanic. There are two responses to this that occurred to me -- one being "don't they just call that ADHD?", and the other being "don't be fooled, you're getting a biased sample". By definition, people see and hear less of me when I'm in shut-in (and/or shut-down) mode. But only recently did it occur to me that examining my behavior through a cyclothymic lens might be worthwhile.
What kept me from considering it is simply that it's been a long time since I've experienced anything I'd call a major depressive episode that wasn't attributable to SAD. One unexpected benefit of going on a low-carb diet is that the SAD has improved dramatically, and at this point I genuinely feel like depression is a problem I've more or less left behind. But what this has enabled me to notice is that I have a different kind of bipolarity: instead of oscillating between periods of mania and depression, it's hypomania and anxiety.
I conceptualize this as mapping to the relative dominance of dopaminergic vs. adrenergic signaling going on between my ears, which is affected by numerous other contextual factors. The question is how much of this is "intrinsic" to my temperament and how much it can be moderated by different habits. I've got ample evidence that it's hereditary, so it would be wise to just consider it part of my temperament, but temperament can be trained.
Here's a manic/panic cycle I find myself in a lot: find something really interesting that confers a sense of reward and run with it (manic), then freak out because while I've been doing that something else I've been neglecting has crept up on me (panic). It seems this could be short-circuited by regularly being reminded what my priorities are, or by setting up my environment in such a way that I'm regularly rewarded for doing things that are in my long-term interest, but this has proven to be a tricky problem. I'm going to need to do a lot more thinking-out-loud about this in the near future.