The Hillbilly Remix Challenge - Some Girls are Bright as the Morning by nigeltde

[norgbelulah]

Remixed Author: jenthegypsy
Remixed Story: Not provided
Title: Some Girls are Bright as the Morning
Author: nigeltde
Characters Mags, Raylan, Boyd, Doyle, Dickie, Coover.
Pairings: Boyd/Raylan
Rating: PG
Word count: 2085
Spoilers: mild early season 3.
Warnings: None
Disclaimer: Justified belongs to Elmore Leonard and Graham Yost.
A/N: Dear jenthegypsy, I loved the theme of your prompt,

Comments

[thornfield_girl]

Wow! That was kind of amazing!Have you ever read Chimd of God by Cormac McCarthy? Because your style reminded me a lot of that, and I had been thinking of trying to write one in that style - but I don't think I will now, because there's this! Great job on this, I loved it.

[nigeltde]

This is gonna sound dumb but I didn't even think of McCarthy, even though I love him. It must have been somewhere in the back of my head! Thanks so much for commenting, I'm so glad you liked it!

ETA: Oh, and of COURSE you must write something in that style! Don't deprive us :-D

[halfshellvenus]

I second the Carmac McCarthy comment. It's a very genuine style for these people. The disadvantage, though, is that the lack of punctuating dialogue and thoughts makes it hard work on the reader. I think you could add those things without diminishing the effect.

This felt very true to all the characters, but most especially Mags. It was wonderful to see such a large backstory for her, one that explained especially how that combination of ruthlessness and tenderness for her family might arise.

I loved the various encounters at the store, with Raylan and Boyd growing older (and the whole side-comment about thinking at that age that you're smarter and more invisible than you really are).

Really, I think this story is even more Mags than the show! Great job!

[nigeltde]

Thanks so much for your thoughtful feedback! I went over this so many times trying to get the right balance. I agree that I didn't quite get there :-D However I did want to retain that feeling of slippage between thought and speech because Mags is so cerebral and I wanted to be as intimate as possible. I'm so glad to hear that even with that the voices came off well.

I love Boyd and Raylan so entirely; I didn't want to privilege them too much but I couldn't resist seeing them through her eyes as often as possible :-D

Thanks again! <3

[lymricks]

Oh. Oh my god. That was gorgeous. This needs about a million more comments, because I hope absolutely everyone reads this. Your style is perfect for Mags, and Mags! Mags fic! Yes! I don't even have anything coherent to say about this because I am way too busy loving it.

You get her so so well, and I love the throwbacks to her pa, and the way you build a world around her entirely in her voice. It was brilliantly done. I'm going to be rereading this forever.

[nigeltde]

\o/ I'm so pleased to hear you liked it! Mags is such an amazing character, I was so happy when my author said she liked to read about Mags because there's so much there to explore. Thank you so much for such lovely comments! <3

[afiakate]

Holy cow. This is awesome.

[nigeltde]

Thank you! <3