Between Trust and Doubt by Emma DeMarais (Challenge #26 - Doubt)
Title: Between Trust and Doubt
Pairing/Characters: David
Rating/Category: PG
Spoilers: Judgment Call, The Janus List, Trust Metric
Summary: David is caught between conflicting emotions
Notes/Warnings: Read the disclaimer on my LJ
For a long time after Megan went in to see Colby in his hospital bed David stood outside - unable to join her and unable to go home, his physical state mirroring his mental one. Trapped between trust and doubt, he wasn't able to forgive and move on nor was he able to retreat into the anger of Colby's betrayal, the anger that had sustained him for weeks when brief moments alone brought the danger of collapse from the strain.
He'd struggled to come to terms with the betrayal. He'd needed time and over the weeks he'd finally settled into an understanding of sorts, one where he accepted what his former partner had done without comprehending in any way how the man he knew, the man he'd entrusted with his life, could have done such a thing.
Yet once he'd convinced himself of Colby's complicity, it wasn't such an easy thing to undo.
His car eventually found its way to the FBI on its own, somehow knowing the idea of going home to his too silent, too empty apartment would be too unbearable.
The room was still set up as Don had left it earlier, with footage of Colby's confession on the monitors.
David loaded a copy of the tape they'd seized on the boat of Lancer's interrogation and torture of Colby and hesitated, his finger hovering over the Play button.
It would be hard to watch. It should be hard to watch. But if he watched it - and watched it as many times as he'd viewed the confession footage - he might just come to believe it.
He needed to believe.
He couldn’t live with the doubt.
He took a deep breath and pressed Play.
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Pairing/Characters: David
Rating/Category: PG
Spoilers: Judgment Call, The Janus List, Trust Metric
Summary: David is caught between conflicting emotions
Notes/Warnings: Read the disclaimer on my LJ
For a long time after Megan went in to see Colby in his hospital bed David stood outside - unable to join her and unable to go home, his physical state mirroring his mental one. Trapped between trust and doubt, he wasn't able to forgive and move on nor was he able to retreat into the anger of Colby's betrayal, the anger that had sustained him for weeks when brief moments alone brought the danger of collapse from the strain.
He'd struggled to come to terms with the betrayal. He'd needed time and over the weeks he'd finally settled into an understanding of sorts, one where he accepted what his former partner had done without comprehending in any way how the man he knew, the man he'd entrusted with his life, could have done such a thing.
Yet once he'd convinced himself of Colby's complicity, it wasn't such an easy thing to undo.
His car eventually found its way to the FBI on its own, somehow knowing the idea of going home to his too silent, too empty apartment would be too unbearable.
The room was still set up as Don had left it earlier, with footage of Colby's confession on the monitors.
David loaded a copy of the tape they'd seized on the boat of Lancer's interrogation and torture of Colby and hesitated, his finger hovering over the Play button.
It would be hard to watch. It should be hard to watch. But if he watched it - and watched it as many times as he'd viewed the confession footage - he might just come to believe it.
He needed to believe.
He couldn’t live with the doubt.
He took a deep breath and pressed Play.
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