went through some old notebooks/journals. found this lyric/poem/verse i had written at the end of last year... and smiled when i read this bit out of it

' a left relic stirred my heart so; fixated upon nirvana's banks, hearts atuned into frequencies damaged in transmission convulted hemmoraging lost songs coming through all they ever hear '

HEY! NASA/IAU! WHAT THE FUCK? PLUTO WAS MY FAVORITE FUCKING PLANET!! SO NOT COOL YOU GUYS!

its hillarious how i dont have the courage to say i miss you.

uh...

and so im back from my mini-vacation. good weather, good wine, and good times with my aunt. im madly deeply in love with my ipod, and apparently now a year older.. fucking 22...

its finally catching up with me, all this un-activity; its making the "depression" that much worse. getting motivated and started on anything is an upward battle. and i think im hurting my ties with people because of it. i havent really spoken to my sister since last thursday and i cant keep myself from getting pissed at her ( Read more... )

in 16 days i turn 22. the only plans i have are to eat a delicious meal with family, then somehow aquire a badass bottle of wine and get drunk. cake in there, most likely interspersed throughout the day, given to me in huge proportions.

sounds like a pretty good birthday.

my dogs been pissing blood today. she hasnt eaten in three days apparently. the growth on her side keeps getting bigger and bigger and her joints are continually failing her.. we're going to the vet tomorrow, but i dont think its to help her.. im prolly going to have to make the decision to put her down.. shit.

it's always a good thing when your sister's boyfriend purchases a pound of mushrooms.

ive promised slave labour for a taste of the little joys. wonder how many grams i can get for my soul.

Heh. He says he reckons I'm a watercolor stain.
He says I run and then I run from him and then I run.
He didn't see me watching from the aeroplane.
He wiped a tear and then he threw away our appleseed.

a pulled back hurts like nothing else.
i did absolutely nothing yesterday but lay on the floor, then lay on a bed.
playing through super mario world again again again.
wishing i had muscle relaxers/pain medication