Catch Me Chapter 6
Yoochun brought flower.
Nobody understood why. Unless, of course, Junsu, who looked shy but utterly happy. Sure, it was valentine but they were both guys. But still.
Yoochun didn’t buy the flower, he planted the rose several months ago and that touched Changmin’s heart a little. He knew Jaejoong offered Yoochun his money to buy a nice bouquet, but Yunho said the thought that matters.
And Yunho was right.
They were in highschool and Yoochun and Junsu had been dating since junior highschool. The couple had spent valentine several times. Jaejoong was busy dating since forever. That left Changmin and Yunho eating jajangmyeon during black day.
“I think we should date,” Yunho said, after asking for more radish to the ahjumma.
“You like someone?” Changmin asked, slurped his jajangmyeon. Because Changmin was, well, he had a girlfriend once during junior highschool. They were dating for six or eight months, but that was that.
“Maybe,” Yunho chuckled.
Changmin stopped eating. “Who?” he wondered why Yunho had never told him before.
“You know, I actually talk about us.” Yunho said, stirred his noodle.
“Yeah?” Changmin unconsciously wiped his mouth, worried if there was a stain there when Yunho was looking at him.
“You and I.” Yunho said. “Should date.”
“I know, you mean you want to date someone and I should find-“ oh. Wait. “You mean you. And I.” oh. Oh, so that what he meant, Changmin thought.
Yunho drank his green tea. “I’m just saying.” He said slowly. “Finish your jajangmyeon. I want ice cream.”
Sure, Yunho was just saying.
But then Yunho would text him frequently. Asked him out. Only two of them. Went to restaurant, watch movies, festivals, and he even got Changmin a giant teddybear when they went to an amusement park. Though later, Yunho asked Changmin if it was okay to give the doll to a crying little girl. Changmin said it was fine, and Yunho bought him a big cotton candy in exchange.
Yunho was kind of kissed kiss cheek when they arrived at Changmin’s home.
He was saying goodnight, sleep well, and his lips brushed against Changmin’s cheek.
Changmin insisted that it was a kiss.
He knew Yunho was romancing him.
He just didn’t know how to do romance.
“Oh, so you like Yunho too.” Jaejoong replied, when Changmin asked what kind of present he should give to Yunho when it wasn’t even his birthday.
Changmin didn’t want to admit but he didn’t want to avoid it either.
“Give your body.” Jaejoong said.
It wasn’t helpful but Changmin had no choice and talked to Jaejoong. He’d talk to Junsu, but Junsu was so close to Yunho and he believed that Junsu would tell the older man. And Yoochun, same with Junsu. Telling Junsu meant telling Yoochun and the opposite.
Of course Changmin didn’t give Yunho his body. He started to think to grow strawberry plants, knowing how much Yunho loved strawberries.
Just like how Yoochun grew rose for Junsu.
Was that mean… the feeling Yoochun had for Junsu, Changmin had it too, for Yunho?
“That thing you said during Black Day,” Changmin said. “That we should date…”
“Yeah?” Yunho was copying Junsu’s homework in the morning. He stopped writing and looked at the younger man.
“Do you consider us dating right now?” Changmin asked, felt strangely unashamed, but in the other hand afraid of Yunho’s reaction.
“I do.” Yunho said straightly. “Well, in my mind. I don’t know how about yours.”
Changmin nodded, but didn’t say a thing. His mouth somehow blossomed to a wide shy smile.
And Yunho understood fully. “So you want to make it official?” he asked. “Because I think I’m a bit too in love with you.”
Changmin laughed. “I’m a bit too in love, too.”
And Yunho’s mouth in an instant was on Changmin’s mouth.
For a second.
Changmin felt so freaking happy that he didn’t know that a human being could have that kind of amazing feeling in a lifetime. He believed in tears of happiness at that time.
Yunho’s smile was so gorgeous and stupid and it made Changmin want to wipe it from his mouth. With his lips.
*
Yunho bought chocolate for Changmin in Valentine.
Changmin said he forgot it was Valentine, but actually his strawberry plant wilted. But Yunho knew, and he grinned, teeth showing, said “It’s okay, Changminnie,” and kissed Changmin’s temple lovingly.
*
Yunho flinched when Changmin bit his skin a bit too hard. His breath was hot and heavy on his neck.
“Yunho…” Changmin moaned, threw his body to the older man.
Yunho held Changmin’s long body, tried to balance him. Looked like he drank too much that night.
Jaejoong’s party was always crazy. He had a villa up in a hill and it was quite big to accommodate such a crowd. He made a post graduation party because “We’ve study hard after all of these years and that, my friend, needs a lot of appreciation and celebration.”
“Hyung~” Changmin called again.
Yunho laughed. “You’re really drunk, Min.”
Changmin giggled, that uncontrollable giggle that made his body shook. “Yunho Oppa~ you dance invertebrately…”
Yunho thought Changmin’s drunk talking was funny. That part of his lover calling him ‘Oppa’ made him shivered, though. Especially when Changmin’s arm went around his body and the younger’s head was leaning on his shoulder from the side.
“You like it don’t you?” Changmin whispered, hot in Yunho’s ear.
“What?” Yunho jolted because Changmin just bit his ear.
“When I call you… Oppa…” Changmin’s voice was husky and low.
Yunho was torn because Changmin’s hands went under his shirt and tickling his waist and he held himself to laugh.
When Jaejoong walked passed them, Changmin stole the little glass in his hand, Yunho wanted to prevent the younger to drink it but it was too late. Changmin drank it in one shot, and God knew what was in Jaejoong’s drink. Jaejoong didn’t complain, though, preoccupied with handful of girls on both sides.
Yunho knew the taste in that drink, mainly bitter, strong, a bit fruity, was that berry? Because in a second Changmin’s mouth covered his, tongue roaming inside his mouth and fuck, Yunho could also feel his adrenaline pumped high when Changmin kissed him.
Hands on each other’s body, mouth attached one to another, they walked left and right, backwards, Yunho crashed someone and his shirt was wet with spilled beer, he’d apologize to the owner if he wasn’t so busy then. Changmin’s head bumped into a door and he was coherent enough to open it and entered, pulled the dancer with him.
“Gosh, I want you, Yunho.” Changmin’s breathy voice filled the room.
Yunho moaned, because, fuck, Changmin’s groan was so damn sexy when he kissed that slender neck.
Changmin pushed Yunho to the bed and sat on the said man’s stomach, leaned down to kiss him deeply. Tasting, exploring, sucking once again, until he was out of breath. Yunho’s lips were so red and addicting and it made him dizzy.
“Let’s have sex,” Changmin said, took off jacket, and his tshirt.
Yunho loved the feeling of Changmin’s smooth skin, his abs and chest and he put his palm on the younger’s heart just to feel the beat.
“Oooh, Yunho, I want you,” Changmin was unbuttoning Yunho’s shirt impatiently.
“Changmin-ah,” Yunho held Changmin’s hand.
Changmin hummed impatiently, and leaned down, licked Yunho’s cheek.
“Changmin, you’re drunk.” Yunho said, grabbed Changmin’s hand tighter.
“I want you so much…” Changmin pressed his body to the man underneath him.
“I want you too…” Yunho wrapped his arms around Changmin’s naked body. “But you’re gonna forget this in the morning.”
“Raw cock… want your… I’m hot, give me… Yun…”
Yunho chuckled, and Changmin’s silly talking made his mind clearer, thank God, because he didn’t want to have sex with his lover in that kind of state. Though Changmin was mumbling about sexy thing, Yunho still thought it was cute. “I know you’re hot, Min.”
Changmin laughed. “Yunho,”
“Yes, love?”
“…”
Yunho checked and Changmin was asleep. He rolled to the side, put pillow under Changmin’s head and pulled the blanket to cover his body. Yunho slipped out from the bed, took off his sticky, uncomfortable shirt and laid next to Changmin. The younger snuggled close to him like a giant koala.
*
“What happened?” Changmin blinked away his sleepiness. He noticed their bared upper body and his jeans was unbuttoned. “Did we do something last night?” not that Changmin would complain, but he just didn’t remember anything about that.
“It’s uncomfortable to sleep with clothes, right?” Yunho yawned. “So I took them off.” Well, Yunho thought, actually Changmin himself who took off his clothes, but… “You feel okay?”
Changmin nodded slowly. “Why? Did I do something?”
Yunho smiled sleepily to the other man. “I’ve told you, you won’t remember.”
“What is it?” Changmin asked curiously. Did he do something stupid? Embarrassing? Or both?
“You just drank too much last night.” Yunho said, eyes still closed because the sunray from the window was a bit strong.
Changmin huffed, but then decided to go back to sleep, leaned his head on Yunho’s chest and clung to him.
And realized something. That Yunho might feel too.
He had a massive morning erection and it pressed against Yunho’s left hip.
They were frozen in a moment, until Changmin realized another thing.
Yunho’s erection was hard against his thigh.
“Is it just my dream, or did I pin you down last night?” Changmin asked.
Yunho grinned. “It happened.”
Changmin bit his lower lip in worry. His hold unconsciously tightened around Yunho’s body.
“But whatever you’ve done, I still love you.” Yunho looked at his boyfriend. “More.”
Changmin felt happy, but couldn’t feel content because his erection was a bit uncomfortable. “I love you too.” He kissed Yunho’s chin. “Can we make a good use of our erect dicks?”
Yunho didn’t hesitate and turned them both, had Changmin under him and made love.
*
“Aish! Really! Yunho! I’ve told you not to bring the toothpaste to the shower!”
Yunho jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom, quickly took the toothpaste and deliver it to Changmin. “Here you go, My Prince,” he offered his charming smile but the younger was still unhappy.
“Yunho! You forget to dry your feet! Again!” Changmin was agitated, his toothbrush almost broke into two in his hand.
“Sorry, sorry,” Yunho stepped back to the mat, wiped his feet dry and mopped the wet foot trail with the same mat.
They were ready for bed, and Changmin was going to turn off the lamp, but- “Gosh, I think I’m gonna cry, Yunho.”
Yunho sat up straight on the bed. “Why? What happened?”
“How many times I’ve told you to take the glass to the sink?! Oh my-“
“Okay, okay, I’ll do it now.” Yunho jumped off the bed, again. He usually drank milk before went to bed, and always forgot to put it to the sink.
Changmin sighed deeply. “Just leave it.” He turned off the lamp. “You wash the dishes tomorrow.”
“Aye, Captain.” Yunho smiled silently in victory.
And that was how Yunho always woke up ahead of Changmin. Turned off the alarm, took his dirty glass to the sink. Made coffee and woke Changmin up. Took a shower, and they would have a breakfast Changmin cooked together. He’d wash the dishes while Changmin was in the shower, and went to the university together.
It was a routine that turned into a habit.
Yunho’s bad, lazy habit was still there, though.
But Changmin didn’t mind.
He was strangely in love with them too, anyway.
*
Changmin’s parents visited their apartment one day. Yunho opened the door and he didn’t know the strangers while the couple in front of him was shocked as well, as if they didn’t expect an unknown man would open the door.
Changmin came to save the situation. “Hi, Mother, Father. This is Yunho,… um… my roommate.”
Mrs Shim lifted her eyebrows. “Oh. So you share the apartment.”
“Yes. It’s… cheaper that way.” Changmin said as he closed the door after his parents walked in.
Mr Shim did a tour himself around the apartment as his wife talked with his son.
Yunho excused himself to make tea for all of them. The thought crept his mind; was Changmin didn’t tell about their relationship to their parents? Because well, then Changmin could just say that Yunho was his boyfriend. Not only a roommate.
They had been together for more than two years. Did Changmin not tell his family about it at all? Yunho, in the other hand, had told his family that he had a boyfriend after they had been together for a year. His mother said that, maybe it was a phase where Yunho was still confused, and maybe later, he’d find a woman to marry. But in the meantime, let Yunho to learn about his sexual orientation further. And his father, well, as always, said nothing.
“Our Changminnie can be handful to live with, isn’t he?” Mrs Shim asked, sipped her tea elegantly.
“Well…” Yunho sat next to Changmin and looked at the other man. “I’m not that easy to live with either.”
Yunho realized he unconsciously had his palm on Changmin’s thigh when he followed Mrs Shim gaze. He quickly pulled back his hands.
Mrs Shim just nodded, but gave him a look.
“Yunho-sshi, you go to the same university as Changmin?” Mr Shim asked.
“Yes, Sir. I actually went to the same highschool as well.” Yunho answered.
“Oh.” Mrs Shim’s eyebrows were high. “Changmin never told us about that.”
Yunho could feel Changmin tensed beside him. “Maybe it’s because I’m his senior. I’m two years older.”
Mrs Shim hummed. “That must be that.” She said.
The parents left not long after, and Changmin looked thankful but guilty at the same time. When Yunho washed the dishes, Changmin hugged him from behind.
“I’m sorry…” he mumbled. “I just… don’t know how to tell them.”
Yunho had no right to be angry. But still, he couldn’t say that he was okay either. He couldn’t lie. And even if he lied, Changmin would know.
But later at night, Yunho just couldn’t see the younger man looked so small and afraid. He finally held him in his arms, and Changmin tightened his hold when Yunho kissed his temple.
“I love you,” Changmin whispered.
Yunho could feel Changmin’s breath on his skin. “I know.”
*
Changmin cried as soon as he arrived in the apartment.
Yunho wrapped him in his embrace, felt Changmin’s body shook with each sob and his shoulder was wet with tears. “What happened?”
“My mother… she hates me.”
God, no. Yunho was frozen for a moment. Changmin told his parents.
Changmin lifted his head and looked at Yunho. “My father said… my mother thought I was gay but still… she didn’t want to believe it…” his face was wet with tears, eyes red and lips trembled.
“Oh Changmin,” Yunho hugged him again. “I should’ve come with you.”
“No. It’s me.” Changmin said. “It’s my problem with my family.”
Yunho didn’t ask for the detail because he was afraid it would hurt Changmin even more. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s my risk, Yunho.” Changmin sniffed. “Don’t apologize.”
Changmin had a morning class the next day, and when Yunho just finished his jogging, Changmin’s father was waiting in the lobby. Yunho really didn’t know what to say, so he said nothing after he greeted him and bowed.
“Changmin’s mother… still need some time to accept it.” Mr Shim said.
Yunho held the iPod in his hand tighter. “And about you, Sir?”
“How long have you been together?” Mr Shim asked.
“Two years and half.” Yunho answered, didn’t dare to look at the man’s eyes.
He sighed. “It’s a long time.”
Yunho said nothing.
“There must be a reason why the two of you can go this far.” Mr Shim said. “I just don’t understand why he told us now. I’m sure he dated a girl once, though. I never expect…” he rubbed his forehead frustatedly.
“I’m sorry, Sir,” Yunho said quietly, bowed again to the man. He knew it was a hard thing for the parents to accept that fact about his son.
“I… can’t hate him. He’s my son. Nor can I hate you.” Mr Shim looked at Yunho sadly. “As his father, Yunho,”
Yunho finally looked at him and realized that Changmin resembled his father a lot.
“I need you to promise me something,” Mr Shim looked at him deeply.
For Changmin, Yunho would do anything. “Anything, Sir.”
“Please protect him,” Mr Shim said.
“I promise I will, Sir.”
“And please love him.” He added. “Until he doesn’t love you anymore.”
*
“What about you, then?” will you be okay, Min? Without me, will you be okay? If I’m leaving, what are you going to do? Will you go after me? Will you hold on to me?
“What about me?” Changmin repeated, staring emptily.
“What about us?” Yunho was dying. His heart beat fast, body felt hot and cold at the same time. He was anticipating but also afraid of the answer. “What will happen to us?”
“If you’re going,” Changmin said slowly. “Then there will be no us.”
Yunho felt weak. Muscles went limp and his spirit felt like leaving his body.
“Let’s break up.”
He said it. He said it.
Changmin said it.
Why was it that easy to say it? Was Yunho didn’t mean that much to him? How could Changmin decide to end their relationship? After all those years they had been together, how small was Yunho’s space in Changmin heart that the man could easily just dismiss him like that? Now that a small storm attack their boat, Changmin would just throw Yunho away to the sea of despair?
His heart didn’t even hurt. It was numb.
“Okay.” Yunho managed to say.
It takes two in a relationship, Yunho sadly thought. If one didn’t want it, it couldn’t be called a relationship anymore.
“If that’s what you want.” Yunho tried really hard to speak. Tell me, Changmin, is that what you really want?
But Changmin was still refused to look at him. “I’ll be going for a while.” He got up.
Yunho contained the urge to hold him.
“If you… it’d be easier for both of us if…” Changmin stuttered as he wore his jacket.
“Don’t worry.” Yunho said, quietly counting the steps Changmin took until he reached the door. No, Yunho, he told himself. He won’t turn back. “I’ll be gone when you come back.”
Nobody understood why. Unless, of course, Junsu, who looked shy but utterly happy. Sure, it was valentine but they were both guys. But still.
Yoochun didn’t buy the flower, he planted the rose several months ago and that touched Changmin’s heart a little. He knew Jaejoong offered Yoochun his money to buy a nice bouquet, but Yunho said the thought that matters.
And Yunho was right.
They were in highschool and Yoochun and Junsu had been dating since junior highschool. The couple had spent valentine several times. Jaejoong was busy dating since forever. That left Changmin and Yunho eating jajangmyeon during black day.
“I think we should date,” Yunho said, after asking for more radish to the ahjumma.
“You like someone?” Changmin asked, slurped his jajangmyeon. Because Changmin was, well, he had a girlfriend once during junior highschool. They were dating for six or eight months, but that was that.
“Maybe,” Yunho chuckled.
Changmin stopped eating. “Who?” he wondered why Yunho had never told him before.
“You know, I actually talk about us.” Yunho said, stirred his noodle.
“Yeah?” Changmin unconsciously wiped his mouth, worried if there was a stain there when Yunho was looking at him.
“You and I.” Yunho said. “Should date.”
“I know, you mean you want to date someone and I should find-“ oh. Wait. “You mean you. And I.” oh. Oh, so that what he meant, Changmin thought.
Yunho drank his green tea. “I’m just saying.” He said slowly. “Finish your jajangmyeon. I want ice cream.”
Sure, Yunho was just saying.
But then Yunho would text him frequently. Asked him out. Only two of them. Went to restaurant, watch movies, festivals, and he even got Changmin a giant teddybear when they went to an amusement park. Though later, Yunho asked Changmin if it was okay to give the doll to a crying little girl. Changmin said it was fine, and Yunho bought him a big cotton candy in exchange.
Yunho was kind of kissed kiss cheek when they arrived at Changmin’s home.
He was saying goodnight, sleep well, and his lips brushed against Changmin’s cheek.
Changmin insisted that it was a kiss.
He knew Yunho was romancing him.
He just didn’t know how to do romance.
“Oh, so you like Yunho too.” Jaejoong replied, when Changmin asked what kind of present he should give to Yunho when it wasn’t even his birthday.
Changmin didn’t want to admit but he didn’t want to avoid it either.
“Give your body.” Jaejoong said.
It wasn’t helpful but Changmin had no choice and talked to Jaejoong. He’d talk to Junsu, but Junsu was so close to Yunho and he believed that Junsu would tell the older man. And Yoochun, same with Junsu. Telling Junsu meant telling Yoochun and the opposite.
Of course Changmin didn’t give Yunho his body. He started to think to grow strawberry plants, knowing how much Yunho loved strawberries.
Just like how Yoochun grew rose for Junsu.
Was that mean… the feeling Yoochun had for Junsu, Changmin had it too, for Yunho?
“That thing you said during Black Day,” Changmin said. “That we should date…”
“Yeah?” Yunho was copying Junsu’s homework in the morning. He stopped writing and looked at the younger man.
“Do you consider us dating right now?” Changmin asked, felt strangely unashamed, but in the other hand afraid of Yunho’s reaction.
“I do.” Yunho said straightly. “Well, in my mind. I don’t know how about yours.”
Changmin nodded, but didn’t say a thing. His mouth somehow blossomed to a wide shy smile.
And Yunho understood fully. “So you want to make it official?” he asked. “Because I think I’m a bit too in love with you.”
Changmin laughed. “I’m a bit too in love, too.”
And Yunho’s mouth in an instant was on Changmin’s mouth.
For a second.
Changmin felt so freaking happy that he didn’t know that a human being could have that kind of amazing feeling in a lifetime. He believed in tears of happiness at that time.
Yunho’s smile was so gorgeous and stupid and it made Changmin want to wipe it from his mouth. With his lips.
*
Yunho bought chocolate for Changmin in Valentine.
Changmin said he forgot it was Valentine, but actually his strawberry plant wilted. But Yunho knew, and he grinned, teeth showing, said “It’s okay, Changminnie,” and kissed Changmin’s temple lovingly.
*
Yunho flinched when Changmin bit his skin a bit too hard. His breath was hot and heavy on his neck.
“Yunho…” Changmin moaned, threw his body to the older man.
Yunho held Changmin’s long body, tried to balance him. Looked like he drank too much that night.
Jaejoong’s party was always crazy. He had a villa up in a hill and it was quite big to accommodate such a crowd. He made a post graduation party because “We’ve study hard after all of these years and that, my friend, needs a lot of appreciation and celebration.”
“Hyung~” Changmin called again.
Yunho laughed. “You’re really drunk, Min.”
Changmin giggled, that uncontrollable giggle that made his body shook. “Yunho Oppa~ you dance invertebrately…”
Yunho thought Changmin’s drunk talking was funny. That part of his lover calling him ‘Oppa’ made him shivered, though. Especially when Changmin’s arm went around his body and the younger’s head was leaning on his shoulder from the side.
“You like it don’t you?” Changmin whispered, hot in Yunho’s ear.
“What?” Yunho jolted because Changmin just bit his ear.
“When I call you… Oppa…” Changmin’s voice was husky and low.
Yunho was torn because Changmin’s hands went under his shirt and tickling his waist and he held himself to laugh.
When Jaejoong walked passed them, Changmin stole the little glass in his hand, Yunho wanted to prevent the younger to drink it but it was too late. Changmin drank it in one shot, and God knew what was in Jaejoong’s drink. Jaejoong didn’t complain, though, preoccupied with handful of girls on both sides.
Yunho knew the taste in that drink, mainly bitter, strong, a bit fruity, was that berry? Because in a second Changmin’s mouth covered his, tongue roaming inside his mouth and fuck, Yunho could also feel his adrenaline pumped high when Changmin kissed him.
Hands on each other’s body, mouth attached one to another, they walked left and right, backwards, Yunho crashed someone and his shirt was wet with spilled beer, he’d apologize to the owner if he wasn’t so busy then. Changmin’s head bumped into a door and he was coherent enough to open it and entered, pulled the dancer with him.
“Gosh, I want you, Yunho.” Changmin’s breathy voice filled the room.
Yunho moaned, because, fuck, Changmin’s groan was so damn sexy when he kissed that slender neck.
Changmin pushed Yunho to the bed and sat on the said man’s stomach, leaned down to kiss him deeply. Tasting, exploring, sucking once again, until he was out of breath. Yunho’s lips were so red and addicting and it made him dizzy.
“Let’s have sex,” Changmin said, took off jacket, and his tshirt.
Yunho loved the feeling of Changmin’s smooth skin, his abs and chest and he put his palm on the younger’s heart just to feel the beat.
“Oooh, Yunho, I want you,” Changmin was unbuttoning Yunho’s shirt impatiently.
“Changmin-ah,” Yunho held Changmin’s hand.
Changmin hummed impatiently, and leaned down, licked Yunho’s cheek.
“Changmin, you’re drunk.” Yunho said, grabbed Changmin’s hand tighter.
“I want you so much…” Changmin pressed his body to the man underneath him.
“I want you too…” Yunho wrapped his arms around Changmin’s naked body. “But you’re gonna forget this in the morning.”
“Raw cock… want your… I’m hot, give me… Yun…”
Yunho chuckled, and Changmin’s silly talking made his mind clearer, thank God, because he didn’t want to have sex with his lover in that kind of state. Though Changmin was mumbling about sexy thing, Yunho still thought it was cute. “I know you’re hot, Min.”
Changmin laughed. “Yunho,”
“Yes, love?”
“…”
Yunho checked and Changmin was asleep. He rolled to the side, put pillow under Changmin’s head and pulled the blanket to cover his body. Yunho slipped out from the bed, took off his sticky, uncomfortable shirt and laid next to Changmin. The younger snuggled close to him like a giant koala.
*
“What happened?” Changmin blinked away his sleepiness. He noticed their bared upper body and his jeans was unbuttoned. “Did we do something last night?” not that Changmin would complain, but he just didn’t remember anything about that.
“It’s uncomfortable to sleep with clothes, right?” Yunho yawned. “So I took them off.” Well, Yunho thought, actually Changmin himself who took off his clothes, but… “You feel okay?”
Changmin nodded slowly. “Why? Did I do something?”
Yunho smiled sleepily to the other man. “I’ve told you, you won’t remember.”
“What is it?” Changmin asked curiously. Did he do something stupid? Embarrassing? Or both?
“You just drank too much last night.” Yunho said, eyes still closed because the sunray from the window was a bit strong.
Changmin huffed, but then decided to go back to sleep, leaned his head on Yunho’s chest and clung to him.
And realized something. That Yunho might feel too.
He had a massive morning erection and it pressed against Yunho’s left hip.
They were frozen in a moment, until Changmin realized another thing.
Yunho’s erection was hard against his thigh.
“Is it just my dream, or did I pin you down last night?” Changmin asked.
Yunho grinned. “It happened.”
Changmin bit his lower lip in worry. His hold unconsciously tightened around Yunho’s body.
“But whatever you’ve done, I still love you.” Yunho looked at his boyfriend. “More.”
Changmin felt happy, but couldn’t feel content because his erection was a bit uncomfortable. “I love you too.” He kissed Yunho’s chin. “Can we make a good use of our erect dicks?”
Yunho didn’t hesitate and turned them both, had Changmin under him and made love.
*
“Aish! Really! Yunho! I’ve told you not to bring the toothpaste to the shower!”
Yunho jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom, quickly took the toothpaste and deliver it to Changmin. “Here you go, My Prince,” he offered his charming smile but the younger was still unhappy.
“Yunho! You forget to dry your feet! Again!” Changmin was agitated, his toothbrush almost broke into two in his hand.
“Sorry, sorry,” Yunho stepped back to the mat, wiped his feet dry and mopped the wet foot trail with the same mat.
They were ready for bed, and Changmin was going to turn off the lamp, but- “Gosh, I think I’m gonna cry, Yunho.”
Yunho sat up straight on the bed. “Why? What happened?”
“How many times I’ve told you to take the glass to the sink?! Oh my-“
“Okay, okay, I’ll do it now.” Yunho jumped off the bed, again. He usually drank milk before went to bed, and always forgot to put it to the sink.
Changmin sighed deeply. “Just leave it.” He turned off the lamp. “You wash the dishes tomorrow.”
“Aye, Captain.” Yunho smiled silently in victory.
And that was how Yunho always woke up ahead of Changmin. Turned off the alarm, took his dirty glass to the sink. Made coffee and woke Changmin up. Took a shower, and they would have a breakfast Changmin cooked together. He’d wash the dishes while Changmin was in the shower, and went to the university together.
It was a routine that turned into a habit.
Yunho’s bad, lazy habit was still there, though.
But Changmin didn’t mind.
He was strangely in love with them too, anyway.
*
Changmin’s parents visited their apartment one day. Yunho opened the door and he didn’t know the strangers while the couple in front of him was shocked as well, as if they didn’t expect an unknown man would open the door.
Changmin came to save the situation. “Hi, Mother, Father. This is Yunho,… um… my roommate.”
Mrs Shim lifted her eyebrows. “Oh. So you share the apartment.”
“Yes. It’s… cheaper that way.” Changmin said as he closed the door after his parents walked in.
Mr Shim did a tour himself around the apartment as his wife talked with his son.
Yunho excused himself to make tea for all of them. The thought crept his mind; was Changmin didn’t tell about their relationship to their parents? Because well, then Changmin could just say that Yunho was his boyfriend. Not only a roommate.
They had been together for more than two years. Did Changmin not tell his family about it at all? Yunho, in the other hand, had told his family that he had a boyfriend after they had been together for a year. His mother said that, maybe it was a phase where Yunho was still confused, and maybe later, he’d find a woman to marry. But in the meantime, let Yunho to learn about his sexual orientation further. And his father, well, as always, said nothing.
“Our Changminnie can be handful to live with, isn’t he?” Mrs Shim asked, sipped her tea elegantly.
“Well…” Yunho sat next to Changmin and looked at the other man. “I’m not that easy to live with either.”
Yunho realized he unconsciously had his palm on Changmin’s thigh when he followed Mrs Shim gaze. He quickly pulled back his hands.
Mrs Shim just nodded, but gave him a look.
“Yunho-sshi, you go to the same university as Changmin?” Mr Shim asked.
“Yes, Sir. I actually went to the same highschool as well.” Yunho answered.
“Oh.” Mrs Shim’s eyebrows were high. “Changmin never told us about that.”
Yunho could feel Changmin tensed beside him. “Maybe it’s because I’m his senior. I’m two years older.”
Mrs Shim hummed. “That must be that.” She said.
The parents left not long after, and Changmin looked thankful but guilty at the same time. When Yunho washed the dishes, Changmin hugged him from behind.
“I’m sorry…” he mumbled. “I just… don’t know how to tell them.”
Yunho had no right to be angry. But still, he couldn’t say that he was okay either. He couldn’t lie. And even if he lied, Changmin would know.
But later at night, Yunho just couldn’t see the younger man looked so small and afraid. He finally held him in his arms, and Changmin tightened his hold when Yunho kissed his temple.
“I love you,” Changmin whispered.
Yunho could feel Changmin’s breath on his skin. “I know.”
*
Changmin cried as soon as he arrived in the apartment.
Yunho wrapped him in his embrace, felt Changmin’s body shook with each sob and his shoulder was wet with tears. “What happened?”
“My mother… she hates me.”
God, no. Yunho was frozen for a moment. Changmin told his parents.
Changmin lifted his head and looked at Yunho. “My father said… my mother thought I was gay but still… she didn’t want to believe it…” his face was wet with tears, eyes red and lips trembled.
“Oh Changmin,” Yunho hugged him again. “I should’ve come with you.”
“No. It’s me.” Changmin said. “It’s my problem with my family.”
Yunho didn’t ask for the detail because he was afraid it would hurt Changmin even more. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s my risk, Yunho.” Changmin sniffed. “Don’t apologize.”
Changmin had a morning class the next day, and when Yunho just finished his jogging, Changmin’s father was waiting in the lobby. Yunho really didn’t know what to say, so he said nothing after he greeted him and bowed.
“Changmin’s mother… still need some time to accept it.” Mr Shim said.
Yunho held the iPod in his hand tighter. “And about you, Sir?”
“How long have you been together?” Mr Shim asked.
“Two years and half.” Yunho answered, didn’t dare to look at the man’s eyes.
He sighed. “It’s a long time.”
Yunho said nothing.
“There must be a reason why the two of you can go this far.” Mr Shim said. “I just don’t understand why he told us now. I’m sure he dated a girl once, though. I never expect…” he rubbed his forehead frustatedly.
“I’m sorry, Sir,” Yunho said quietly, bowed again to the man. He knew it was a hard thing for the parents to accept that fact about his son.
“I… can’t hate him. He’s my son. Nor can I hate you.” Mr Shim looked at Yunho sadly. “As his father, Yunho,”
Yunho finally looked at him and realized that Changmin resembled his father a lot.
“I need you to promise me something,” Mr Shim looked at him deeply.
For Changmin, Yunho would do anything. “Anything, Sir.”
“Please protect him,” Mr Shim said.
“I promise I will, Sir.”
“And please love him.” He added. “Until he doesn’t love you anymore.”
*
“What about you, then?” will you be okay, Min? Without me, will you be okay? If I’m leaving, what are you going to do? Will you go after me? Will you hold on to me?
“What about me?” Changmin repeated, staring emptily.
“What about us?” Yunho was dying. His heart beat fast, body felt hot and cold at the same time. He was anticipating but also afraid of the answer. “What will happen to us?”
“If you’re going,” Changmin said slowly. “Then there will be no us.”
Yunho felt weak. Muscles went limp and his spirit felt like leaving his body.
“Let’s break up.”
He said it. He said it.
Changmin said it.
Why was it that easy to say it? Was Yunho didn’t mean that much to him? How could Changmin decide to end their relationship? After all those years they had been together, how small was Yunho’s space in Changmin heart that the man could easily just dismiss him like that? Now that a small storm attack their boat, Changmin would just throw Yunho away to the sea of despair?
His heart didn’t even hurt. It was numb.
“Okay.” Yunho managed to say.
It takes two in a relationship, Yunho sadly thought. If one didn’t want it, it couldn’t be called a relationship anymore.
“If that’s what you want.” Yunho tried really hard to speak. Tell me, Changmin, is that what you really want?
But Changmin was still refused to look at him. “I’ll be going for a while.” He got up.
Yunho contained the urge to hold him.
“If you… it’d be easier for both of us if…” Changmin stuttered as he wore his jacket.
“Don’t worry.” Yunho said, quietly counting the steps Changmin took until he reached the door. No, Yunho, he told himself. He won’t turn back. “I’ll be gone when you come back.”