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[nodeedtoobase]

What is the meaning of this? Who has transformed me, and to what purpose?

[ooc: Edward hasn't managed to look in a mirror yet, since his mirror is buried under stuff. He just knows he's significantly taller and buffer than usual.]

Comments

[pleasesmirk]

...it's wizards. Clearly. It's always the wizards, even here. Or, at least, something very close to wizards. Loose magic or something ridiculous that Hix'd spend days explaining.

you still get a text response because swing has issues.

[pleasesmirk]

Not at all, sorry. He's tall... ginger, that's about all I can tell.

To be honest, you're from my future. It's unlikely I'd know them. Worth a try, I suppose.

videoooo

[nodeedtoobase]

[Edward, surprised, kind of pulls uselessly at his hair, then pats his face.]

Ginger?

[He dashes off. Then, a while later, he comes back.]

I'm him! I'm him! I'm the king!

text.

[pleasesmirk]

The King.

Surely you don't mean... you mean the Low King from Uberwald or some other king, don't you?

Ankh-Morpork does not have a king. Vimes executed him.

video

[nodeedtoobase]

The rightful heir to the throne survived. He may not possess the crown or sit upon the throne, but one day he'll claim what is rightfully his and Ankh-Morpork will have a king again!

text and very, very heavily struck out.

[pleasesmirk]

And the rightful heir is... tall and ginger?

I'm almost wishing I was Vimes right now so I could cut your head off.

video, plus awesome speech impediment

[nodeedtoobase]

Y-es, he does, in fact, bear a rema-rkable resemblance to his ancestors! The evidence is obvious to anyo-ne who isn't blind!

text, minus awesome speech impediment. he's intrigued, though.

[pleasesmirk]

I... never particularly cared.

So who is this ginger heir to the throne? He can't be better than Vetinari. Or any other Patrician.

video

[nodeedtoobase]

No, of course you didn't. You were perfectly content to let usu-rpers rule!

His name is Corporal Carro-t Ironfoundersson, and he is better because the thr-one is his birthri-ght!

text

[pleasesmirk]

Those usurpers at least are more competent than a King and answer to the city. Winder's assassination proved that

Corporal? Of... what?

video

[nodeedtoobase]

The-y are not! They have everyo-ne fooled into believing they are competent, and nobody wa-nts to do anything abo-ut it because it woul-d be an inconv-enience!

He's a Corporal of the Nig-ht Watch.

text - congratulations. you made swing laugh. That's almost impossible

[pleasesmirk]

And a King would be more competent?

So... this 'King' of yours works for your Patrician? That is brilliant.

text now 'cause I'm lazy

[nodeedtoobase]

Of course he would be!

He's working a humble, undistinguished job. That's how these things go.

[pleasesmirk]

It is not a humble, undistinguished job. I was personally responsible for the Patrician's safety. He might have just been a Corporal, but watchmen have great responsiblity.