Bobbsey Twins Liveblog 2009: So It Begins
Chapter One: A Rocky Boat Ride
Already we are off to a fine, suggestive start. At least, we are if you, like me, possess the sense of humor of a twelve-year-old boy. In fact, if you, like me, are over the age of 21, you could turn this into a drinking game: the Unintentionally Suggestive Phrase Drinking Game (or USPDG). Take a shot.
"We're going for a visit on a bee-yoo-ti-ful island!" sang out blonde, blue-eyed Flossie Bobbsey gaily.
She was gazing at the Hudson River from the rear sear of the family station wagon.
"And get the presents Aunt Alice has for us," said her six-year-old twin, Freddie. He was alongside Flossie. The little boy grinned. "I wonder what the presents are!"
Note the elegance with which Laura Lee Hope has established the age and general appearance of the youngest twins, as well as their position in the car. It's so subtle, you hardly realize you're taking the information in at all. It's as if she has psychically implanted the knowledge into your brain. Also, note that almost every sentence uttered by either of the youngest Bobbseys is punctuated with an exclamation point. I have a sneaking suspicion that this will be the norm.
I shan't transcribe the entire book; we'd be here forever. So, to be brief: Flossie opines that she would like to receive a new doll. Nan, her twelve-year-old sister (who, Hope tells us, is in the middle seat with her twin, Bert, who is dark-haired and -eyed like her), reminds Flossie that Aunt Alice is pawning off her old things on the children and not buying new things, so an old doll is the best Flossie can hope for. "Oh!" Flossie said. "Well, old dolls can be fun to play with, too!" Those of you playing the USPDG: take a shot. Also, see what I meant about the exclamation points?
Bert and his father have a short dialogue about fishing, and then Bert asks his "pretty mother" why Aunt Alice doesn't want to live on the island anymore. Aunt Alice is getting on in years and wants to move to NYC, where life for an old spinster is far safer and more agreeable than life on a sparsely populated island. In fact, the island's residents number only three: Aunt Alice, and a couple named Toony and Trudy.
Flossie finds these names highly amusing, which I think is a bit rich coming from someone whose name is usually reserved for those of the bovine persuasion.
Toony and Trudy, as it turns out, are descendants of Dutch settlers who help Aunt Alice by maintaining the island grounds, running Aunt Alice's boat, and doing the housework and cooking. So the reason Aunt Alice is giving the children some of her old junk instead of buying them new things isn't because she's not loaded; it's because she's, uh... frugal.
Mr. Bobbsey affectionately calls Freddie a "little fat fireman" because Freddie wants to be a fireman when he grows up (and presumably because he is little and fat, as well). Freddie secretly hopes his gift will be a toy fire engine, but he keeps this thought to himself--he, unlike his twin, knows the value of discretion. So, in terms of character development, we now know that Freddie and Flossie are blonde, blue-eyed, little, and (in Freddie's case) possibly fat. Freddie likes firefighting, Flossie likes dolls. It is as if they are leaping off the page at you, so well fleshed-out are they (at least Freddie is! Haw!).
They stop for lunch at a crowded diner; only two booths are empty. The elder twins graciously offer to take one booth so their parents can sit with the younger twins in the other. They seem almost freakishly polite and courteous, in fact; but remember, these were written in the 50s and 60s. If Bert and Nan were ever rude or obnoxious, Mr. Bobbsey probably beat them with a belt (his first name is Dick, by the way). Anyway. As Bert and Nan are eating, they overhear two men in the booth behind theirs:
"I'm sure there's smuggling going on along the river," one man was saying, "but we haven't been able to learn how it's being done or who's doing it."
"Haven't you any idea?" his companion asked.
"No," the first voice replied. "That's why I'm up here--to find out."
The elder twins are fascinated. Intrigue! Eavesdropping! Government agents acting on good old-fashioned hunches in the absence of so much as one shred of proof of their suspicions! But Mr. Bobbsey spoils their fun, herding them back to the car before they can overhear anything more.
Fortunately, the two men exit the diner not long after the Bobbsey family does, and one of them promptly drops and important government memo. The wind blows it straight towards Bert, who dives for it in an action-packed sequence that demands an illustration:
INTENSE!!!
Bert is thanked profusely by the older of the two men, a U.S. Customs Service agent by the name of John Ward. Mr. Ward then proceeds to tell the older twins far more than is necessary about his job and the memo Bert snagged (but was too polite to surreptitiously glance at before handing it back over). And when he learns that the family is heading for an island on the Hudson, he gives them his card and asks them to watch out for any shenanigans or goings on. Bert and Nan are thrilled at the chance to be good junior agents for The Man.
"Guess what!" cried Bert, as his father started off. "Nan and I are detectives now!" He told the others what Mr. Ward had said about smuggling on the river. (That it only exists in his mind... so far.)
"Flossie and I'll help you look for the bad men!" Freddie assured Bert. As his twin nodded vigorously, the others laughed. (Because the idea of a six-year-old blowing the whistle on smugglers is laughable, unlike the idea of a twelve-year-old doing so.)
"Good for you!" said Mr. Bobbsey. (The exclamation points are catching! Oh no! They've got me, too!!)
Mr. Bobbsey drops off the wife and kids at River Edge Dock, where Toony greets them and shuffles them onto Aunt Alice's boat, the White Gull. Mrs. Bobbsey is unnerved by the choppiness of the water, but Toony reassures her that it's only a river, fergodsake, and if you're in anything sturdier than a canoe you'll be fine, so quit whining (only minus the sarcasm). They soon reach Conover Island. As Toony helps them up onto the dock, he makes a startling realization:
"Why, a box of valuables I left here on the dock is gone!" he exclaimed worriedly. "Gone! Someone must have stolen it!"
"The smugglers!" cried Freddie.
I don't know for certain just how many people live on Conover Island; Aunt Alice's surname is Conover, so I had figured it was just the three of them. If that is the case, I don't know why Toony presumes the valuables have been stolen and not just carted off by his wife or Aunt Alice. And if there ARE more people on the island, I'm not sure why a box of valuables was just left on the dock. Toony may be a few forks short of a fondue set, I think.
SO ENDS CHAPTER ONE.