You are totally justified in feeling that way. Disability or not, that person needs to learn about interacting with people in public, which should be his caretakers' job. Just like with children, if they can't behave in public, why bring them?? I'd have a talk with the caretakers next time you see them and explain everything you explained here, and if they are any sort of decent people, they'll keep a closer eye on the person they are supposed to be watching & taking care of.
In my opinion, any sort of unwanted boob grabbing (or other touching) is harrassment, especialy if you've told him multiple times you don't appreciate it. It seems like it would be a tricky situation because he has a disability, but that shouldn't matter - harrassment is harrassment.
Urgh, that is horrible. It sounds like you have handled it the best way possible up until this point. What a awkward situation as well. I don't know what to suggest. I am very bad at confrontational type stuff, I try to avoid it. So if it were me I'd switch up my days that I shop just to avoid them.
Thanks. I feel better getting some feedback. I told my mom about it and she told me I, "needed to be more compassionate." I don't understand that reasoning at all. It's not like I'm yelling at him or calling him a retard. I just don't want random people of any age, mental capability, or any variation to come up and hug me without asking.
So yeah, I feel better knowing other people would be bothered too. I didn't see him at the store this weekend, and I was there during the early part of the hours when he usually finds me, so who knows.
I'm sure your mom was well meaning but you were being compassionate. It is a risk to your health, a serious one. Also, I'm like you. I'm not a hugger. I mean with certain friends and dad, of course. But I feel so uncomfortable and awkward when someone you just met comes at you, arms wide open, for a big ol' hug.
His caregivers are doing him a disservice by allowing this and not taking it seriously. One day he is going to do this to someone else, from behind, and their startle reaction is going to kick in and he is going to get hit or hurt. Or even from the front. If it was me, and someone my size or bigger ran at me and hugged me out of the blue, my first reaction would be to shove them back and away. It would be instinctive and a gut reaction.
My mom is freekin' crazy to be totally honest. She was a teacher, and had her SpEd certification too. She tends to pull that card and wave it around like she's a martyr. "Ohhh those poor souls!" Umm yeah. It's not like I called him names. I JUST DIDN'T WANT TO BE TOUCHED BY SOME RANDOM DUDE. Again, she didn't get it. Just my mom being insane like usual. I'm glad I live far away
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I don't honestly know that- it's a large Fred Meyers and wickedly busy. Something like the top grossing store in its sector. For all I know they go through the self service line like I do.
Oh god that is so creepy to have happen! On many levels. Ew. That would totally unnerve me. And that's totally inappropriate behavior. His caretaker either needs to take this seriously, or be reported, I agree. And even at a big busy store, I imagine the fellow and his caretakers are likely known. They would tend to stand out more. For all we know maybe there have been complaints in the past?
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Yeah, next time I'll try again and try to get their names. Then warn them if it keeps happening that I will go to the authorities.
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Good luck!
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I feel better getting some feedback. I told my mom about it and she told me I, "needed to be more compassionate." I don't understand that reasoning at all. It's not like I'm yelling at him or calling him a retard. I just don't want random people of any age, mental capability, or any variation to come up and hug me without asking.
So yeah, I feel better knowing other people would be bothered too. I didn't see him at the store this weekend, and I was there during the early part of the hours when he usually finds me, so who knows.
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His caregivers are doing him a disservice by allowing this and not taking it seriously. One day he is going to do this to someone else, from behind, and their startle reaction is going to kick in and he is going to get hit or hurt. Or even from the front. If it was me, and someone my size or bigger ran at me and hugged me out of the blue, my first reaction would be to shove them back and away. It would be instinctive and a gut reaction.
Hopefully you won't run in to him again.
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And that's totally inappropriate behavior. His caretaker either needs to take this seriously, or be reported, I agree. And even at a big busy store, I imagine the fellow and his caretakers are likely known. They would tend to stand out more. For all we know maybe there have been complaints in the past?
Much love!
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