Amy Winehouse thought to have tuberculosis (Neat)...
...best headline of the gossip columns all day.
Girl was wrong the drag show isn't tonight, it's tomorrow, so we're just chillin' for tonight, gonna finish watching The Golden Compass and then maybe start The Water Horse. We drove down to get ice cream and took Beacon with us; they make a doggy dish called a Scooby Sundae with vanilla ice cream and milk bones for spoons. She was so funny because she doesn't do well in new situations but she knew something good was gonna happen because I kept asking her if she wanted ice cream and she knew the W word all too well. She started talking and shaking and people in line were laughing at her. She thoroughly enjoyed her dish. As a matter of fact, she had not only a milk mustache, but an entire milk beard, which she wiped on my leg. Then, she decided she would try and help herself to my mint chip. She's adorable, in the naughtiest way of course.
Back-story needed for the next bit.
When I went home to my parents house a couple weeks ago, I had dinner with my best friend and on the hour ride home, thought I saw road kill and swerved to avoid squishing it since nothing was coming. As I passed it, I realized that it was a turtle. So I drove down to where the road got wider and parked, and walked hundreds of feet back to see it. Sure enough a giant turtle was laying in the right lane. I decide I'm going to save this creature when I discover, through it's actions, that it is a snapping turtle. It starts violently spinning and trying to take my hand off. I tried to prod it with a stick to get out of the road but it just kept spinning and snapping. I keep trying to sneak up on it and grab it, but every time I try to lift it, it gets it's talons under my hands and kicks them off. After fifteen to twenty minutes of this, I quickly grab the damn thing and start to walk back to my car parked next to a pond. The thing weighed at least 10 pounds and got heavy trying not to get eaten while I carried to to safety. Now about 10 feet into my harrowing rescue, I get a whiff of what this thing is cookin'. I don't know how many of you have come in close proximity to a snapping turtle, but this one was hissing at me and if I had to describe it's musky aroma, terms like curdled milk in a rotten garbage might come to mind. As I get close to my car, I'm looking for a place to put it down and see none other than another giant turtle laying eggs in a nest, and there is another nest a few feet away from that. I can't figure out how I'm going to put this thing down without losing appendages, so basically I set it close to the ground and lunge it forward a little bit and as predicted, it tries to eat me. Anyway, me and my turtle didn't bond. The other thing you might not know about turtles is that they have a very sticky slime and I just know from experience that they are covered with salmonella. So, there I stand with my slimy, sticky salmonella spunk and nothing in my car to wipe it off on. I spit on my hands, rub them together and then on the grass. This does little to help matters. I hear my turtle jump into the pond and get in my car. Luckily my aunt lives only ten minutes from where this happened and I stop there at 9:00 p.m. to wash my hands and steering wheel, even though I'd only been driving with my palms. Ick. I did take pictures, but with just my phone, it was just too dark to register more than a weird blob with a protrusion on the end.
ANYWAY, girl is now on a mission to save a turtle because she wants to be the turtle whisperer too, so she looks for them as we are driving. While we were getting ice cream, I jokingly asked if she wanted to save a turtle and she very exuberantly declared that yes she did. On the way home, we spot an eency weency turtle in the middle of the road. She hits the brakes and we both flee the car arguing over who gets to rescue the damn thing. We are racing, me in my skirt, and I won but then stood there and waited and let her touch the nasty little thing. It was a baby snapper. with a very pointy little nose.
So, yeah.
Tomorrow, I'm gonna take Spiro and Beacon to PetSmart, 'cause they really miss it since we aren't working in the hospital in the back anymore. Girl and I were going to go to lunch and a movie and later the drag show, but I just got an e-mail from my next door neighbor at my parents house four hours away who will be about an hour away tomorrow and did I want to have lunch with her and the foreign exchange student she had when I was in second grade, from Iceland. I need to think about it.
We were going to go to the Ithaca Festival on Sunday but girl has to work, so it would just be Jen, Ray and me, which is no fun, especially since they are always late so I would be wandering alone for hours. I think I might catch a picnic at my new co-worker's instead. Sounds like everyone will be there, and even though I miss my old co-workers like crazy, it would probably be good for me to get to know these people. I just miss a staff that you can sexually harass, swear like a trucker around, and grope
Last note, it's my little sister's 13th birthday! She is now officially a rotten teenager!
Peace out and sorry for such a long rambling post.
Girl was wrong the drag show isn't tonight, it's tomorrow, so we're just chillin' for tonight, gonna finish watching The Golden Compass and then maybe start The Water Horse. We drove down to get ice cream and took Beacon with us; they make a doggy dish called a Scooby Sundae with vanilla ice cream and milk bones for spoons. She was so funny because she doesn't do well in new situations but she knew something good was gonna happen because I kept asking her if she wanted ice cream and she knew the W word all too well. She started talking and shaking and people in line were laughing at her. She thoroughly enjoyed her dish. As a matter of fact, she had not only a milk mustache, but an entire milk beard, which she wiped on my leg. Then, she decided she would try and help herself to my mint chip. She's adorable, in the naughtiest way of course.
Back-story needed for the next bit.
When I went home to my parents house a couple weeks ago, I had dinner with my best friend and on the hour ride home, thought I saw road kill and swerved to avoid squishing it since nothing was coming. As I passed it, I realized that it was a turtle. So I drove down to where the road got wider and parked, and walked hundreds of feet back to see it. Sure enough a giant turtle was laying in the right lane. I decide I'm going to save this creature when I discover, through it's actions, that it is a snapping turtle. It starts violently spinning and trying to take my hand off. I tried to prod it with a stick to get out of the road but it just kept spinning and snapping. I keep trying to sneak up on it and grab it, but every time I try to lift it, it gets it's talons under my hands and kicks them off. After fifteen to twenty minutes of this, I quickly grab the damn thing and start to walk back to my car parked next to a pond. The thing weighed at least 10 pounds and got heavy trying not to get eaten while I carried to to safety. Now about 10 feet into my harrowing rescue, I get a whiff of what this thing is cookin'. I don't know how many of you have come in close proximity to a snapping turtle, but this one was hissing at me and if I had to describe it's musky aroma, terms like curdled milk in a rotten garbage might come to mind. As I get close to my car, I'm looking for a place to put it down and see none other than another giant turtle laying eggs in a nest, and there is another nest a few feet away from that. I can't figure out how I'm going to put this thing down without losing appendages, so basically I set it close to the ground and lunge it forward a little bit and as predicted, it tries to eat me. Anyway, me and my turtle didn't bond. The other thing you might not know about turtles is that they have a very sticky slime and I just know from experience that they are covered with salmonella. So, there I stand with my slimy, sticky salmonella spunk and nothing in my car to wipe it off on. I spit on my hands, rub them together and then on the grass. This does little to help matters. I hear my turtle jump into the pond and get in my car. Luckily my aunt lives only ten minutes from where this happened and I stop there at 9:00 p.m. to wash my hands and steering wheel, even though I'd only been driving with my palms. Ick. I did take pictures, but with just my phone, it was just too dark to register more than a weird blob with a protrusion on the end.
ANYWAY, girl is now on a mission to save a turtle because she wants to be the turtle whisperer too, so she looks for them as we are driving. While we were getting ice cream, I jokingly asked if she wanted to save a turtle and she very exuberantly declared that yes she did. On the way home, we spot an eency weency turtle in the middle of the road. She hits the brakes and we both flee the car arguing over who gets to rescue the damn thing. We are racing, me in my skirt, and I won but then stood there and waited and let her touch the nasty little thing. It was a baby snapper. with a very pointy little nose.
So, yeah.
Tomorrow, I'm gonna take Spiro and Beacon to PetSmart, 'cause they really miss it since we aren't working in the hospital in the back anymore. Girl and I were going to go to lunch and a movie and later the drag show, but I just got an e-mail from my next door neighbor at my parents house four hours away who will be about an hour away tomorrow and did I want to have lunch with her and the foreign exchange student she had when I was in second grade, from Iceland. I need to think about it.
We were going to go to the Ithaca Festival on Sunday but girl has to work, so it would just be Jen, Ray and me, which is no fun, especially since they are always late so I would be wandering alone for hours. I think I might catch a picnic at my new co-worker's instead. Sounds like everyone will be there, and even though I miss my old co-workers like crazy, it would probably be good for me to get to know these people. I just miss a staff that you can sexually harass, swear like a trucker around, and grope
Last note, it's my little sister's 13th birthday! She is now officially a rotten teenager!
Peace out and sorry for such a long rambling post.