Fanfiction: A Good Friend (Transformers)

[neverminetohold]

Title: „A Good Friend"
Status: One-Shot; Complete
Fandom: Transformers, G1 (on Cybertron)
Characters: Ratchet, Prowl
Disclaimer: I would love to own Transformers, but that honor belongs to Hasbro and some others.
Rating: T
Beta: The great snare-chan! Thank you so much for your help!
Summary: Being a medic is never easy, especially with a civil war raging

Comments

[renegadewriter8]

Awwwwww I liked this! Loved the two's interaction. hehe yes Ratch, Prowl knows EVERYTHING! XD

[neverminetohold]

Actually, this one is a deleted scene from "Lasting Patchjob", it didn't fit but I thought it could very well stand on its own, with a bit of an overhaul ^-^

Prowl is omniscient, that's part of his charm! LOL

corrections... and approval

[whitefirebird]

"...sparked were gabs..." -> should be "where gaps"
"Ratchet dealt with all that - up close and personal. He does." -> fragment, consider revising. Also tense changes; please check for whether it makes sense at a glance. The reader is not a mind-reader.

Anywho, this is a nice piece. It illustrates well the importance of close ties, and how even the smallest act by someone known and/or trusted and/or a friend can make a difference. Even if it's not immediately recognised.

Re: corrections... and approval

[neverminetohold]

Thank you for pointing out the mistakes! I changed the one with gabs/gaps, the other, though... I'm back to feeling my brain go blank, like it always did when I was called to the board in math class - tenses tend to confuse the hell out of me, when I start to really think about them... But uhm - "He did." - right?

The other though... Maybe it's because I wrote it and suffer from tunnel vision because of that, but to me, the sentence plus the fragment makes sense...? The "He does." is simply referring back to the sentence before, to put a stronger emphasis on it... Should I put it in one sentence...?

Anyhow, thanks again for the crit, it's more than welcome! ^o^

[prowl]

Love it! :D It is a good look at how close friends have become during the war. Also shows Prowl knows alllll!!!! XD

[neverminetohold]

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it! ^.^ And of course Prowl knows all, that's just the way he is!

[whitefirebird]

check out the "communique" universe at this address (it's the second or third page in) http://thepaddedcell71381.yuku.com/forums/6/The-Writing-Workshop

It's absolutely hilarious, and much expanded from the form on ff.net. I give warning now - do NOT eat or drink while reading this!

[neverminetohold]

*snerk* I - that's... °x° I can't... LOL