Fic: 'Love, Sex, and Parachutes'
Okay. I'm tired of being depressed, so I'm posting a happy fic to cheer myself up. And here it is...
Title: Love, Sex, and Parachutes
Author: Never
Pairing: Brendon/Ryan, Jon/Spencer, Frank/Bob, Patrick/Pete, and Joe/Ray (if you want to see it)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not true.
Warning: AU.
Summary: Spencer owns Decaydance Skydiving and employs many of the bandom boys.
Author’s Notes: The idea hit after I went skydiving myself. The style is a product of too much The Office. As always, thanks to d41j0ubu! He totally spoiled me by making time to beta this fic when he was crazy busy and even came up with the title. *glomps him*
***
“So,” the interviewer begins, “how is Spencer as a boss?”
Brendon glances around, then leans forward. “Is Spencer going to see this?”
The interviewer takes a moment to answer. “We hope to show this documentary somewhere, so yes, Spencer will probably see it.”
Straightening, Brendon raises his voice, no doubt so his co-workers outside the supply-closet-turned-interview-room can hear him. “Spencer James Smith V is an awesome boss. The best!” Then an enormous grin blooms on his face and he nods enthusiastically at the video camera.
***
Joe and Ray are suiting up side by side for their tandems when Brendon suddenly appears next to them.
“I want to join your club,” Brendon grins.
Joe stops what he’s doing to ask, “Our club?”
Nodding, Brendon beams. “Yeah, your club. The Crazy Haired Dude Club! See? I can totally fit in.” Then he runs his fingers through his hair until its standing up at all angles. “I’m a crazy haired dude too!”
“Have you filled out the application?” Ray asks as he pulls his hair back in a ponytail.
“No. I thought I could get in on just my looks.”
“Sorry,” Joe shakes his head, “you’re not that cute.”
Brendon’s bottom lip instantly pops out in a pout.
“Still not cute enough,” Joe says as he tries to tame his hair.
“Don’t I pay you to work?” Spence shouts from the office.
***
“What do I think of Spence as a boss?” Frank repeats the question. “He pays me; that’s always good. And he doesn’t get all pissy when Bob and I-“ a black box appears over Frank’s mouth, censoring him, “bleep around.”
“And Bob is?” the interviewer prompts.
“Oh! He’s my boyfriend. I bleeping hate that word; it sounds so junior high. But lover sounds like I’m only in it for the sex, which is great, yeah, but. You know, Bob’s the guy who bleeping bleeps my bleeping bleep bleep and my bleeping heart. How’s that for an adult term?” Frank asks, giggling in the interview seat.
***
Spence opens the door to the supply closet and instantly slams it shut again. His foot is tapping and his hands are on his cocked hips. Across the room, Jon’s entire face flushes before he turns away.
“You told us to get a bleeping room!” Frank’s voice calls from inside the supply closet.
“Just hurry up!” Spence yells back. “You two go up in 20 minutes!”
***
“Um,” the interviewer refocuses the camera on Bob, who’s sitting in the interview chair silently. “What do you think of Spencer as a boss?”
Bob stares into the lens.
Several awkward moments pass before the interviewer moves on, “What’s it like working with your boyfriend, Frank?”
Still no response from Bob.
Finally, the interviewer reaches for the camera. “Okay, I think we’ve got enough for now.”
***
“So how it’s going to work,” Bob explains to a middle-aged woman beside him, “is that we’re going to be connected to each other when we dive out of the plane. I’m going to need you to bend your legs back between mine and cross your arms over your chest to grasp your harness. Then when I tap your leg, you can leg go of your harness and hold your arms out like this.” He demonstrates by holding his arms out and bending his elbows at 90 degree angles.
He nods at the woman as she imitates him, but then he glances over and looks right into the camera. His eyes narrow and instantly the scene goes black.
***
“…and he’s totally adorable. Like a teddy bear - all soft and cuddly. And the guy can sing like an angel! Just think: he lives one floor above me. His bed is directly above mine! I think about it sometimes when I’m lying there, trying to sleep at ni-“
The interviewer interrupts, “Pete, if you could just stay on track and answer the question, I’d appreciate it.”
“Oh yeah! Um. Spencer is a great boss.”
“I understand that you don’t exactly have the best employee record.”
“Yeah, I get called into his office a lot. Just like elementary school or some bleep.”
“What is it you do to get called into his office?”
“I’m a videographer, right? I jump with the customers going tandem and I film the entire dive. But sometimes, I jump out of the plane before the customer. No big. I just hate waiting for the bleeps who get scared at the last minute and don’t want to jump. So anyway, Spence calls me in, yells at me a little, says he’ll fire me if I do it again, then I grin at him, he breaks, and tells me to get out of his office.”
“How long has he been threatening to fire you?”
“What year is it?”
The interviewer blinks. “Um. 2008.”
“Two years,” he nods.
“Two years. That’s a long time.”
Pete shrugs. “It’s what we do.”
***
Spencer watches Jon step out of the small propeller plane and stroll towards the hangar. He smiles at Jon, and Jon immediately grins back. However, his grin almost overpowers the rest of his face when Spence starts to walk back to his office, only to stumble at the first step. His cheeks are red when he tells Jon to be ready to go back up in fifteen minutes, then he ducks into his office.
Idly scratching his stubble, Jon smiles at Spence through the office window.
***
“What do you think of Spence?” the interviewer inquires.
Jon blushes and gets a far away look in his eye. “He’s great. I mean, he’s beautiful, there’s no arguing that. And his smile? It feels like he’s smiling just for me, and I can’t help but smile back at him. And those hips. There. There is no-“
“I meant as a boss. What do you think of Spencer as a boss?”
“Oh. Um. He’s great. Very,” he hesitates. “Very. Professional.”
***
“Just between you and me,” Brendon whispers, “Spence is scary. Like, seriously scary. I think he could dropkick me down the runway.”
***
Brendon bounces into the office area of Decaydance Skydiving, and beams at Ryan, who’s sitting beside Spencer, talking. “Hey Ryan!” Brendon exclaims. He starts to greet Spencer with the same attitude, but one glare from Spence shuts him up.
“Hey Brendon.” Ryan has a small smile on his lips as he gazes up at Brendon.
“You going to let me take you on the ride of your life yet?” Brendon asks.
Spence glares some more.
“Not today,” Ryan replies.
Brendon’s grin transforms into a soft smile as he says, “You will one day. I know it.” Then he goes out to the hangar to pack his parachute.
***
The interviewer looks down at his notepad. “So what exactly do you do here, Ryan?”
“I’m best friends with Spencer,” he answers.
“You don’t actually work here?”
“No.”
“And you don’t skydive?”
“No.”
“You’re here only because of Spence?” The interviewer sounds skeptical.
Ryan doesn’t respond.
“What do you think of the people who work here?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, what do you think of Jon?”
“Jon’s a pretty good pilot. If I was ever to go up, it would be with him.”
“And Bob?”
“Bob’s the most qualified tandem instructor in the area.”
The interviewer sighs. “What do you think of them on a personal level?”
“I don’t think of Bob on a personal level.”
“Okay. What about Brendon?”
Ryan looks away and doesn’t answer for a minute. “He’s good too.”
***
Brendon jumps on Ray’s back, wrapping his arms and legs around him. “Give me a pony ride!” Brendon exclaims.
Ray sighs, but gallops through the hangar in a large circle, weaving between the other workers milling around.
Joe is at his locker, stepping into his jumpsuit. He makes a show of not looking, but as Ray gallops by, Joe makes a neighing sound, which elicits a giggle from Brendon.
From the office, Ryan watches with a smile on his face.
***
“There seems to be something going on between Ryan and Brendon.”
Spencer quirks an eyebrow at the interviewer. “Is that your question?”
The interviewer readjusts himself in his seat. “What do you think is going on?”
“None of your business.”
“It just looks like they like each other. That’s all.”
Spencer’s eyes narrow. “Did you have something you wanted to ask me about Decaydance Skydiving?”
“Uh. What made you decide to open Decaydance?”
“I like skydiving, and there wasn’t a place around here to do it. Now, are we finished?”
“One more thing: Jon.”
Spencer stands up and walks out.
***
“Who does that guy think he is?” Spence asks Ryan. The two of them are alone in Spencer’s office with the door shut, so their voices are muffled.
“He’s a guy doing a documentary on your business,” Ryan says.
“He’s asking a lot of questions that have nothing to do with the business.”
“You gave him permission.”
Spencer glowers at him.
“What did he ask?”
“He mentioned Jon.”
The corner of Ryan’s lips quirk up. “That’s what this is? Angry that the interviewer noticed you have a major mancrush on Jon?”
“He asked about you and Brendon too.”
Ryan doesn’t say another word.
***
“Do you want to explain the accident to me?”
Brendon beams at the interviewer, exclaiming, “It was totally awesome! I wish you had gotten it on tape!”
“I would have liked to, but with the three of you already in there, the supply closet was crammed pretty tight. So, the accident?”
Suddenly, Brendon’s face is blank. He whispers, “Is Bob going to see this?”
“We’ve been over this before, Brendon. Yes, Bob will probably see this.”
Eyes wide, Brendon immediately speaks to the camera, “It was all Pete’s idea! Bob, I swear. All Pete.”
***
The doctor looks over Frank at Bob, Pete, and Brendon. “And whose idea was it this time?”
Pete automatically points to Brendon, and once the latter notices, he points to Pete.
Bob is too busy hovering over Frank, seated on the emergency room bed to pay attention.
“This is your third trip to the ER this month, Frank,” the doctor sighs.
Frank grins up at him. “The last two times were for bets. This was a matter of honor.”
The doctor checks his clipboard. “A roundhouse kick, a sewing machine, and a crowded supply closet was a matter of honor?”
Bob finally looks away from a nodding Frank in order to glower at Pete and Brendon.
They both smile innocently back.
***
“I finally found out his name. Patrick. Patrick Stump. Bleep, I want to cuddle his name almost as much as I want to cuddle him!”
“Pete,” the interviewer rubs his forehead, “the accident?”
“Oh yeah! Totally Brendon’s idea. Totally.”
***
The hangar door is open, allowing a view of the cloudy sky outside. In the corner, Pete, Frank, Brendon, and Ray are all crowded together, laughing and talking.
Pete brays at the others. “You totally have to do it, Frank. Come on!”
Brendon’s gaze darts around the hanger, then turns back to his group. “Bob’s not around. It’s your one chance to do it before he comes back and stops you.”
Ray is the voice of reason who says, “I don’t think you should. Do you really want to end up in the ER again this month? What would it be? Your fourth time?”
Pete, Brendon, and Frank all turn to Ray like he’s gone crazy.
“Dude,” Pete counters, “if he does it right, there won’t be a trip to the ER. Don’t be a buzzkill.”
Ray raises his hand in mock surrender. “Fine. But when Bob asks, I tried to talk you guys out of it. And I’m telling him whose idea it was.”
Brendon and Pete share a look. Brendon starts to say, “Maybe we shouldn’t…” However, by the time he turns towards Frank to finish the sentence, Frank is already on top of the plane with the bowling ball and the rope.
***
“I know I haven’t been here long, but I’ve noticed that you, Pete, and Frank spend a lot of time together,” the interviewer says.
Brendon nods. “We’re the only three videographers.”
The interviewer appears confused. “Um. I’ve also noticed that none of you are ever willing to claim credit for the more…creative ideas on how to pass the time that usually end up with Frank going to the ER.”
“Dude. Have you seen Bob?”
***
Frank walks into the hangar on his own two feet, but there is a slight limp. Just beside him, ready to assist is Bob.
Brendon and Pete trail behind, whispering and giggling to each other. However, one look from Bob shuts them both up.
***
“I understand that you don’t like doctors or hospitals. In fact, I’ve been told that you refuse to go to the hospital yourself. So how does that make you feel when your boyfriend goes to the emergency room so often? Do you ever want to find out who comes up with these crazy ideas and maybe sit them down and…” the interviewer trails off.
Bob’s eyes narrow minutely.
Clearing his throat, the interviewer says, “You know what? I think we’re done here.”
***
Brendon and Pete each gather up their parachutes, then high-five each other as they walk back to the hangar. Spencer is standing at the hangar door, his arms crossed over his chest.
Pete reports, “The ceiling is 12,000 feet, with a few patches of clouds at 500 feet. It looks pretty clear.”
Nodding, Brendon says, “I think we can start sending them up.”
Spence gives a quick nod and turns to the waiting customers. “Okay, Mr. and Mrs. Harrison, as soon as Jon lands, we can get you up in the air for your first dives.”
Behind him, Pete slaps Brendon on the back, grinning wide. Brendon takes a deep breath and nods at something Pete whispers into his ear. Then he turns his eyes to the office where Ryan is smiling at him.
***
“I’m doing it tonight. I’m asking Ryan out on a date, and I’m helping Jon and Spencer find true love,” Brendon explains. “I’ve got it all planned out, and I’m going to be totally stealthy about it.”
The interviewer studies Brendon for a moment. “Um. You’re going to be stealthy about helping Jon and Spencer, or in asking Ryan out?”
“Both.”
“Doesn’t being stealthy with Ryan defeat the purpose of asking him out?”
“No, because I’ll still be on a date with Ryan and Spence won’t have killed me.”
“You don’t want to be open about asking Ryan out because of Spencer?”
“Ryan and Spence are best friends, and, like I said before, Spence is scary. Like, ‘never find my body’ scary. I have to handle this delicately. It’s just a good thing that I can totally do delicate.”
The interviewer opens his mouth to say something, but instead just takes a deep breath and looks down at his clipboard.
“I am the king of delicate!”
***
Brendon grins. “Hey Ryan. Um, Frank, Bob, Jon and I are going out and I was wondering if you and Spence wanted to come too. You know. Frank and Bob. Spence and Jon. You and me?” The moment he stops talking, his lower lip is seized between his teeth.
“What about Pete? And Joe and Ray?” Ryan asks.
“Joe and Ray had other plans, and Pete is busy stalking his upstairs neighbor tonight. So?”
Ryan glances back at Spencer, who’s locking up his office, and his eyebrows shoot up when he sees Spence smile and nod.
Turning back to Brendon, Ryan smiles too. “Okay.”
***
“How did your date go last night?” the interviewer asks, grinning widely.
Brendon’s face is blank and he won’t look at the camera or the interviewer. His voice is quiet when he says, “I thought you were only supposed to ask about skydiving stuff.”
The interviewer’s grin fades. “This film is about the business and the people.”
“Well,” Brendon’s voice is even softer as he stares down at his hands resting in his lap, “I don’t want to talk about that.”
***
Brendon tries to pack his parachute three times before Pete finally comes over and does it for him. A minute later, Ray and Joe plop down beside the two videographers on the mat.
“You shouldn’t go up today, man,” Ray says.
Joe nods in agreement.
Pete pauses in the packing. “With how you are now, you’re likely to make a mistake.”
“Yeah,” Joe agrees again, “and a mistake up there can make you go splat on the drop zone.”
Brendon cringes. “Ew. Okay. Frank’s been cleared by the doctor, so he can have my jumps.”
“Sounds good. I’ll go tell him.”
***
The interviewer isn’t smiling when he asks, “How did your date go last night?”
“It wasn’t a date,” Ryan answers. He looks down at the floor then towards the door of the interview room.
It’s silent for a moment, then the interviewer nods. “Okay.”
***
Ryan is sitting in the office, staring out the window into the hangar. Jon stands beside him, and follows his gaze to Brendon, who’s huddled on a corner of the mat outside. After a soft squeeze to Ryan’s shoulder, Jon walks up to Spencer and wraps his arms around Spencer’s waist. He plants a single kiss on Spencer’s neck before letting go and going back out to the hangar.
***
“I take it your date went well,” the interviewer is smiling again.
Jon beams straight at the camera. “It was great.”
“And you and Spence are…”
“Dating,” he nods, still beaming. “We want to take it a little slow, though, since we work together and he’s my boss and all.”
“That’s great, Jon. Congratulations.” The interviewer glances down at his clipboard. “I understand things didn’t go as well between Ryan and Brendon.”
Jon looks away and his grin disappears. “No.”
“Do you know what happened?”
He shakes his head.
The interviewer nods and sighs.
***
“Come on,” Pete throws an arm around Brendon’s shoulders. “We’ll go out on the town, then I’ll take you home. We can stalk Patrick together. It’ll be awesome.”
Brendon bites his lower lip. “I don’t know. I kinda just want to be alone.”
“That’s the last thing you need, man,” Ray says as he appears at Brendon’s other side.
Out in the parking lot, they’re all standing by Pete’s car when Spencer, Jon, and Ryan lock up the hangar and walk to Jon’s car.
No one moves or says anything as Brendon and Ryan stare at each other a moment. Then Brendon tries a smile, and Ryan ducks into Jon’s backseat.
***
The interviewer shifts in his seat. “Do you know what happened between Ryan and Brendon on their date?”
Spencer silently stares at him.
“I was really hoping things would work out between them. They seem to really like each other.”
Again, Spencer stares at him, then looks to the camera. “Wouldn’t it be a shame if someone were to get their hands on the interviews you’ve already filmed? Then they might find out that Ryan really likes Brendon, but he thought their date wasn’t a date; that they were just going out as friends. And when Brendon tried to take it to the next level, Ryan thought Brendon was playing with him.”
The interviewer blinks several times, then turns towards the camera. Clearing his throat, his eyes dart back to Spencer. “Yes, that would be horrible.”
Spencer throws a glare at the interviewer. “But what would be even worse - possibly fatal - would be if this interview ended up being seen by anyone else.”
Quickly nodding, the interviewer reached over to turn off the camera.
***
Brendon stumbles out of the interview room and leans against the wall. His eyes wide and filled with a strange mixture of ecstatic and sad. Immediately, he pushes himself off the wall, running towards the office. He disappears inside a moment, then walks back out with a bemused Ryan in-tow.
The two of them march out of the hangar into the parking lot.
Several of the other workers try to crowd around the door to the hangar to listen in, but one glare from Spence has them all scattering to their various jobs.
And once everyone disperses, Spencer casually strolls over to the hangar door and surreptitiously watches Brendon and Ryan from a distance.
***
The interviewer is grinning as he asks, “I take it you and Ryan have worked things out?”
Brendon beams back at him. “Isn’t it great? I just told him how I felt and that I wanted to go on a real date with him - no stealth or confusion - and then we made out in Spencer’s backseat.” His eyes suddenly wide, he turns to the camera. “Um. I mean. We, uh. We didn’t go near Spencer’s car. Hear that, Spencer? Absolutely nothing happened in your backseat. Anyone who says otherwise is a dirty fibber. Honest.” Looking back at the interviewer, Brendon asks, his eyes big and pitiful, “Is there any way you can just edit out that last bit? Please?”
***
Brendon checks his watch again the next morning. Sighing, he asks Joe and Ray if they’ve seen Pete, but they both shake their heads no.
Just four minutes and thirty-one seconds before they are schedule to go up, Pete shows up at the hangar door with an enormous grin and a short blonde guy with glasses and a baseball cap.
“Everyone, this is Patrick, the love of my life. Patrick, these are the people who got me by before I met you,” Pete says, nuzzling into Patrick’s neck.
“Um,” Patrick blinks. “Why is there a camera pointed at me?”
***
“Isn’t he perfect?” Pete asks. His whole body is wrapped around Patrick’s as they are both packed into the interview room. “Isn’t he exactly how I described him?”
Patrick manages to get his hands between his body and Pete’s and shoves so he can look Pete in the eye. “You talked about me to this guy?”
The interviewer shakes his head. “You have no idea.”
end
Title: Love, Sex, and Parachutes
Author: Never
Pairing: Brendon/Ryan, Jon/Spencer, Frank/Bob, Patrick/Pete, and Joe/Ray (if you want to see it)
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not true.
Warning: AU.
Summary: Spencer owns Decaydance Skydiving and employs many of the bandom boys.
Author’s Notes: The idea hit after I went skydiving myself. The style is a product of too much The Office. As always, thanks to d41j0ubu! He totally spoiled me by making time to beta this fic when he was crazy busy and even came up with the title. *glomps him*
***
“So,” the interviewer begins, “how is Spencer as a boss?”
Brendon glances around, then leans forward. “Is Spencer going to see this?”
The interviewer takes a moment to answer. “We hope to show this documentary somewhere, so yes, Spencer will probably see it.”
Straightening, Brendon raises his voice, no doubt so his co-workers outside the supply-closet-turned-interview-room can hear him. “Spencer James Smith V is an awesome boss. The best!” Then an enormous grin blooms on his face and he nods enthusiastically at the video camera.
***
Joe and Ray are suiting up side by side for their tandems when Brendon suddenly appears next to them.
“I want to join your club,” Brendon grins.
Joe stops what he’s doing to ask, “Our club?”
Nodding, Brendon beams. “Yeah, your club. The Crazy Haired Dude Club! See? I can totally fit in.” Then he runs his fingers through his hair until its standing up at all angles. “I’m a crazy haired dude too!”
“Have you filled out the application?” Ray asks as he pulls his hair back in a ponytail.
“No. I thought I could get in on just my looks.”
“Sorry,” Joe shakes his head, “you’re not that cute.”
Brendon’s bottom lip instantly pops out in a pout.
“Still not cute enough,” Joe says as he tries to tame his hair.
“Don’t I pay you to work?” Spence shouts from the office.
***
“What do I think of Spence as a boss?” Frank repeats the question. “He pays me; that’s always good. And he doesn’t get all pissy when Bob and I-“ a black box appears over Frank’s mouth, censoring him, “bleep around.”
“And Bob is?” the interviewer prompts.
“Oh! He’s my boyfriend. I bleeping hate that word; it sounds so junior high. But lover sounds like I’m only in it for the sex, which is great, yeah, but. You know, Bob’s the guy who bleeping bleeps my bleeping bleep bleep and my bleeping heart. How’s that for an adult term?” Frank asks, giggling in the interview seat.
***
Spence opens the door to the supply closet and instantly slams it shut again. His foot is tapping and his hands are on his cocked hips. Across the room, Jon’s entire face flushes before he turns away.
“You told us to get a bleeping room!” Frank’s voice calls from inside the supply closet.
“Just hurry up!” Spence yells back. “You two go up in 20 minutes!”
***
“Um,” the interviewer refocuses the camera on Bob, who’s sitting in the interview chair silently. “What do you think of Spencer as a boss?”
Bob stares into the lens.
Several awkward moments pass before the interviewer moves on, “What’s it like working with your boyfriend, Frank?”
Still no response from Bob.
Finally, the interviewer reaches for the camera. “Okay, I think we’ve got enough for now.”
***
“So how it’s going to work,” Bob explains to a middle-aged woman beside him, “is that we’re going to be connected to each other when we dive out of the plane. I’m going to need you to bend your legs back between mine and cross your arms over your chest to grasp your harness. Then when I tap your leg, you can leg go of your harness and hold your arms out like this.” He demonstrates by holding his arms out and bending his elbows at 90 degree angles.
He nods at the woman as she imitates him, but then he glances over and looks right into the camera. His eyes narrow and instantly the scene goes black.
***
“…and he’s totally adorable. Like a teddy bear - all soft and cuddly. And the guy can sing like an angel! Just think: he lives one floor above me. His bed is directly above mine! I think about it sometimes when I’m lying there, trying to sleep at ni-“
The interviewer interrupts, “Pete, if you could just stay on track and answer the question, I’d appreciate it.”
“Oh yeah! Um. Spencer is a great boss.”
“I understand that you don’t exactly have the best employee record.”
“Yeah, I get called into his office a lot. Just like elementary school or some bleep.”
“What is it you do to get called into his office?”
“I’m a videographer, right? I jump with the customers going tandem and I film the entire dive. But sometimes, I jump out of the plane before the customer. No big. I just hate waiting for the bleeps who get scared at the last minute and don’t want to jump. So anyway, Spence calls me in, yells at me a little, says he’ll fire me if I do it again, then I grin at him, he breaks, and tells me to get out of his office.”
“How long has he been threatening to fire you?”
“What year is it?”
The interviewer blinks. “Um. 2008.”
“Two years,” he nods.
“Two years. That’s a long time.”
Pete shrugs. “It’s what we do.”
***
Spencer watches Jon step out of the small propeller plane and stroll towards the hangar. He smiles at Jon, and Jon immediately grins back. However, his grin almost overpowers the rest of his face when Spence starts to walk back to his office, only to stumble at the first step. His cheeks are red when he tells Jon to be ready to go back up in fifteen minutes, then he ducks into his office.
Idly scratching his stubble, Jon smiles at Spence through the office window.
***
“What do you think of Spence?” the interviewer inquires.
Jon blushes and gets a far away look in his eye. “He’s great. I mean, he’s beautiful, there’s no arguing that. And his smile? It feels like he’s smiling just for me, and I can’t help but smile back at him. And those hips. There. There is no-“
“I meant as a boss. What do you think of Spencer as a boss?”
“Oh. Um. He’s great. Very,” he hesitates. “Very. Professional.”
***
“Just between you and me,” Brendon whispers, “Spence is scary. Like, seriously scary. I think he could dropkick me down the runway.”
***
Brendon bounces into the office area of Decaydance Skydiving, and beams at Ryan, who’s sitting beside Spencer, talking. “Hey Ryan!” Brendon exclaims. He starts to greet Spencer with the same attitude, but one glare from Spence shuts him up.
“Hey Brendon.” Ryan has a small smile on his lips as he gazes up at Brendon.
“You going to let me take you on the ride of your life yet?” Brendon asks.
Spence glares some more.
“Not today,” Ryan replies.
Brendon’s grin transforms into a soft smile as he says, “You will one day. I know it.” Then he goes out to the hangar to pack his parachute.
***
The interviewer looks down at his notepad. “So what exactly do you do here, Ryan?”
“I’m best friends with Spencer,” he answers.
“You don’t actually work here?”
“No.”
“And you don’t skydive?”
“No.”
“You’re here only because of Spence?” The interviewer sounds skeptical.
Ryan doesn’t respond.
“What do you think of the people who work here?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, what do you think of Jon?”
“Jon’s a pretty good pilot. If I was ever to go up, it would be with him.”
“And Bob?”
“Bob’s the most qualified tandem instructor in the area.”
The interviewer sighs. “What do you think of them on a personal level?”
“I don’t think of Bob on a personal level.”
“Okay. What about Brendon?”
Ryan looks away and doesn’t answer for a minute. “He’s good too.”
***
Brendon jumps on Ray’s back, wrapping his arms and legs around him. “Give me a pony ride!” Brendon exclaims.
Ray sighs, but gallops through the hangar in a large circle, weaving between the other workers milling around.
Joe is at his locker, stepping into his jumpsuit. He makes a show of not looking, but as Ray gallops by, Joe makes a neighing sound, which elicits a giggle from Brendon.
From the office, Ryan watches with a smile on his face.
***
“There seems to be something going on between Ryan and Brendon.”
Spencer quirks an eyebrow at the interviewer. “Is that your question?”
The interviewer readjusts himself in his seat. “What do you think is going on?”
“None of your business.”
“It just looks like they like each other. That’s all.”
Spencer’s eyes narrow. “Did you have something you wanted to ask me about Decaydance Skydiving?”
“Uh. What made you decide to open Decaydance?”
“I like skydiving, and there wasn’t a place around here to do it. Now, are we finished?”
“One more thing: Jon.”
Spencer stands up and walks out.
***
“Who does that guy think he is?” Spence asks Ryan. The two of them are alone in Spencer’s office with the door shut, so their voices are muffled.
“He’s a guy doing a documentary on your business,” Ryan says.
“He’s asking a lot of questions that have nothing to do with the business.”
“You gave him permission.”
Spencer glowers at him.
“What did he ask?”
“He mentioned Jon.”
The corner of Ryan’s lips quirk up. “That’s what this is? Angry that the interviewer noticed you have a major mancrush on Jon?”
“He asked about you and Brendon too.”
Ryan doesn’t say another word.
***
“Do you want to explain the accident to me?”
Brendon beams at the interviewer, exclaiming, “It was totally awesome! I wish you had gotten it on tape!”
“I would have liked to, but with the three of you already in there, the supply closet was crammed pretty tight. So, the accident?”
Suddenly, Brendon’s face is blank. He whispers, “Is Bob going to see this?”
“We’ve been over this before, Brendon. Yes, Bob will probably see this.”
Eyes wide, Brendon immediately speaks to the camera, “It was all Pete’s idea! Bob, I swear. All Pete.”
***
The doctor looks over Frank at Bob, Pete, and Brendon. “And whose idea was it this time?”
Pete automatically points to Brendon, and once the latter notices, he points to Pete.
Bob is too busy hovering over Frank, seated on the emergency room bed to pay attention.
“This is your third trip to the ER this month, Frank,” the doctor sighs.
Frank grins up at him. “The last two times were for bets. This was a matter of honor.”
The doctor checks his clipboard. “A roundhouse kick, a sewing machine, and a crowded supply closet was a matter of honor?”
Bob finally looks away from a nodding Frank in order to glower at Pete and Brendon.
They both smile innocently back.
***
“I finally found out his name. Patrick. Patrick Stump. Bleep, I want to cuddle his name almost as much as I want to cuddle him!”
“Pete,” the interviewer rubs his forehead, “the accident?”
“Oh yeah! Totally Brendon’s idea. Totally.”
***
The hangar door is open, allowing a view of the cloudy sky outside. In the corner, Pete, Frank, Brendon, and Ray are all crowded together, laughing and talking.
Pete brays at the others. “You totally have to do it, Frank. Come on!”
Brendon’s gaze darts around the hanger, then turns back to his group. “Bob’s not around. It’s your one chance to do it before he comes back and stops you.”
Ray is the voice of reason who says, “I don’t think you should. Do you really want to end up in the ER again this month? What would it be? Your fourth time?”
Pete, Brendon, and Frank all turn to Ray like he’s gone crazy.
“Dude,” Pete counters, “if he does it right, there won’t be a trip to the ER. Don’t be a buzzkill.”
Ray raises his hand in mock surrender. “Fine. But when Bob asks, I tried to talk you guys out of it. And I’m telling him whose idea it was.”
Brendon and Pete share a look. Brendon starts to say, “Maybe we shouldn’t…” However, by the time he turns towards Frank to finish the sentence, Frank is already on top of the plane with the bowling ball and the rope.
***
“I know I haven’t been here long, but I’ve noticed that you, Pete, and Frank spend a lot of time together,” the interviewer says.
Brendon nods. “We’re the only three videographers.”
The interviewer appears confused. “Um. I’ve also noticed that none of you are ever willing to claim credit for the more…creative ideas on how to pass the time that usually end up with Frank going to the ER.”
“Dude. Have you seen Bob?”
***
Frank walks into the hangar on his own two feet, but there is a slight limp. Just beside him, ready to assist is Bob.
Brendon and Pete trail behind, whispering and giggling to each other. However, one look from Bob shuts them both up.
***
“I understand that you don’t like doctors or hospitals. In fact, I’ve been told that you refuse to go to the hospital yourself. So how does that make you feel when your boyfriend goes to the emergency room so often? Do you ever want to find out who comes up with these crazy ideas and maybe sit them down and…” the interviewer trails off.
Bob’s eyes narrow minutely.
Clearing his throat, the interviewer says, “You know what? I think we’re done here.”
***
Brendon and Pete each gather up their parachutes, then high-five each other as they walk back to the hangar. Spencer is standing at the hangar door, his arms crossed over his chest.
Pete reports, “The ceiling is 12,000 feet, with a few patches of clouds at 500 feet. It looks pretty clear.”
Nodding, Brendon says, “I think we can start sending them up.”
Spence gives a quick nod and turns to the waiting customers. “Okay, Mr. and Mrs. Harrison, as soon as Jon lands, we can get you up in the air for your first dives.”
Behind him, Pete slaps Brendon on the back, grinning wide. Brendon takes a deep breath and nods at something Pete whispers into his ear. Then he turns his eyes to the office where Ryan is smiling at him.
***
“I’m doing it tonight. I’m asking Ryan out on a date, and I’m helping Jon and Spencer find true love,” Brendon explains. “I’ve got it all planned out, and I’m going to be totally stealthy about it.”
The interviewer studies Brendon for a moment. “Um. You’re going to be stealthy about helping Jon and Spencer, or in asking Ryan out?”
“Both.”
“Doesn’t being stealthy with Ryan defeat the purpose of asking him out?”
“No, because I’ll still be on a date with Ryan and Spence won’t have killed me.”
“You don’t want to be open about asking Ryan out because of Spencer?”
“Ryan and Spence are best friends, and, like I said before, Spence is scary. Like, ‘never find my body’ scary. I have to handle this delicately. It’s just a good thing that I can totally do delicate.”
The interviewer opens his mouth to say something, but instead just takes a deep breath and looks down at his clipboard.
“I am the king of delicate!”
***
Brendon grins. “Hey Ryan. Um, Frank, Bob, Jon and I are going out and I was wondering if you and Spence wanted to come too. You know. Frank and Bob. Spence and Jon. You and me?” The moment he stops talking, his lower lip is seized between his teeth.
“What about Pete? And Joe and Ray?” Ryan asks.
“Joe and Ray had other plans, and Pete is busy stalking his upstairs neighbor tonight. So?”
Ryan glances back at Spencer, who’s locking up his office, and his eyebrows shoot up when he sees Spence smile and nod.
Turning back to Brendon, Ryan smiles too. “Okay.”
***
“How did your date go last night?” the interviewer asks, grinning widely.
Brendon’s face is blank and he won’t look at the camera or the interviewer. His voice is quiet when he says, “I thought you were only supposed to ask about skydiving stuff.”
The interviewer’s grin fades. “This film is about the business and the people.”
“Well,” Brendon’s voice is even softer as he stares down at his hands resting in his lap, “I don’t want to talk about that.”
***
Brendon tries to pack his parachute three times before Pete finally comes over and does it for him. A minute later, Ray and Joe plop down beside the two videographers on the mat.
“You shouldn’t go up today, man,” Ray says.
Joe nods in agreement.
Pete pauses in the packing. “With how you are now, you’re likely to make a mistake.”
“Yeah,” Joe agrees again, “and a mistake up there can make you go splat on the drop zone.”
Brendon cringes. “Ew. Okay. Frank’s been cleared by the doctor, so he can have my jumps.”
“Sounds good. I’ll go tell him.”
***
The interviewer isn’t smiling when he asks, “How did your date go last night?”
“It wasn’t a date,” Ryan answers. He looks down at the floor then towards the door of the interview room.
It’s silent for a moment, then the interviewer nods. “Okay.”
***
Ryan is sitting in the office, staring out the window into the hangar. Jon stands beside him, and follows his gaze to Brendon, who’s huddled on a corner of the mat outside. After a soft squeeze to Ryan’s shoulder, Jon walks up to Spencer and wraps his arms around Spencer’s waist. He plants a single kiss on Spencer’s neck before letting go and going back out to the hangar.
***
“I take it your date went well,” the interviewer is smiling again.
Jon beams straight at the camera. “It was great.”
“And you and Spence are…”
“Dating,” he nods, still beaming. “We want to take it a little slow, though, since we work together and he’s my boss and all.”
“That’s great, Jon. Congratulations.” The interviewer glances down at his clipboard. “I understand things didn’t go as well between Ryan and Brendon.”
Jon looks away and his grin disappears. “No.”
“Do you know what happened?”
He shakes his head.
The interviewer nods and sighs.
***
“Come on,” Pete throws an arm around Brendon’s shoulders. “We’ll go out on the town, then I’ll take you home. We can stalk Patrick together. It’ll be awesome.”
Brendon bites his lower lip. “I don’t know. I kinda just want to be alone.”
“That’s the last thing you need, man,” Ray says as he appears at Brendon’s other side.
Out in the parking lot, they’re all standing by Pete’s car when Spencer, Jon, and Ryan lock up the hangar and walk to Jon’s car.
No one moves or says anything as Brendon and Ryan stare at each other a moment. Then Brendon tries a smile, and Ryan ducks into Jon’s backseat.
***
The interviewer shifts in his seat. “Do you know what happened between Ryan and Brendon on their date?”
Spencer silently stares at him.
“I was really hoping things would work out between them. They seem to really like each other.”
Again, Spencer stares at him, then looks to the camera. “Wouldn’t it be a shame if someone were to get their hands on the interviews you’ve already filmed? Then they might find out that Ryan really likes Brendon, but he thought their date wasn’t a date; that they were just going out as friends. And when Brendon tried to take it to the next level, Ryan thought Brendon was playing with him.”
The interviewer blinks several times, then turns towards the camera. Clearing his throat, his eyes dart back to Spencer. “Yes, that would be horrible.”
Spencer throws a glare at the interviewer. “But what would be even worse - possibly fatal - would be if this interview ended up being seen by anyone else.”
Quickly nodding, the interviewer reached over to turn off the camera.
***
Brendon stumbles out of the interview room and leans against the wall. His eyes wide and filled with a strange mixture of ecstatic and sad. Immediately, he pushes himself off the wall, running towards the office. He disappears inside a moment, then walks back out with a bemused Ryan in-tow.
The two of them march out of the hangar into the parking lot.
Several of the other workers try to crowd around the door to the hangar to listen in, but one glare from Spence has them all scattering to their various jobs.
And once everyone disperses, Spencer casually strolls over to the hangar door and surreptitiously watches Brendon and Ryan from a distance.
***
The interviewer is grinning as he asks, “I take it you and Ryan have worked things out?”
Brendon beams back at him. “Isn’t it great? I just told him how I felt and that I wanted to go on a real date with him - no stealth or confusion - and then we made out in Spencer’s backseat.” His eyes suddenly wide, he turns to the camera. “Um. I mean. We, uh. We didn’t go near Spencer’s car. Hear that, Spencer? Absolutely nothing happened in your backseat. Anyone who says otherwise is a dirty fibber. Honest.” Looking back at the interviewer, Brendon asks, his eyes big and pitiful, “Is there any way you can just edit out that last bit? Please?”
***
Brendon checks his watch again the next morning. Sighing, he asks Joe and Ray if they’ve seen Pete, but they both shake their heads no.
Just four minutes and thirty-one seconds before they are schedule to go up, Pete shows up at the hangar door with an enormous grin and a short blonde guy with glasses and a baseball cap.
“Everyone, this is Patrick, the love of my life. Patrick, these are the people who got me by before I met you,” Pete says, nuzzling into Patrick’s neck.
“Um,” Patrick blinks. “Why is there a camera pointed at me?”
***
“Isn’t he perfect?” Pete asks. His whole body is wrapped around Patrick’s as they are both packed into the interview room. “Isn’t he exactly how I described him?”
Patrick manages to get his hands between his body and Pete’s and shoves so he can look Pete in the eye. “You talked about me to this guy?”
The interviewer shakes his head. “You have no idea.”
end