Accessing SPECTRE Terminal
Final thoughts for the end of the game, and hopes for the future.
Hmm, I probably haven't written anything new here, but I'm doing this for myself anyway. I haven't written so much for myself personally since my old insanejournal roleplaying days.
I remember when I first played Mass Effect. I was introduced to it by my best friend. Over the course of a sleep-over, she, another friend, and I played through most of the game. We'd skipped most of the side quests, except for many of the ones on the Citadel, and we were swept away by the story. Together, the three of us created a female Shepard, with the first name, Sylvia. She was an Earthborn/Sole Survivor, played as a Renegade. She had short, curly red hair, bright green eyes, and a severe, stubborn look on her face. She was tough and didn't accept any nonsense from anyone. But she softened a little when we met Liara, because it was a novelty for us to see an essentially same-sex romance play out. Sylvia was also, I believe, one of the biotic classes, but because we weren't sure how biotics or the power-wheel worked, we almost never used them. xD
We powered through most of the game. Even though she was tough, she couldn't destroy the rachni or let Wrex die. We got to Ilos, and we flung her through the conduit, and we fought through the Citadel. But we didn't manage to make it to the Council Chambers, because we became exhausted after a whole day and evening playing, and had to quit. Unfortunately, some time after that, my friend lost the saves due to technical difficulties with the console. She thought about replaying Sylvia to the point where we all left off, but she never got around to it, and we had moved on to playing other games together.
But I never forgot how much fun that game was. When I graduated with my bachelor's degree, my parents offered to get me a gift, and I requested an XBOX 360 in order to specifically play Mass Effect eventually. I made my own new Shepard, Jillian, a fierce child of the streets who went out to save Elysium and proved to anyone who ever doubted her that she could overcome her origins. Even though she was born on Earth, she found aliens to be fascinating. You couldn't stop her from wanting and trying to help everyone more or less fortunate than her.
I've been with her across all three games, as I know many other players have seen their Shepards throughout all three games. I have four other, completed Shepards, and some of them have had multiple playthroughs in games one and two. If there had been any solid indication that Mass Effect 3 would end as it did, then why did so many people not see this coming?
Why didn't I see this coming?
I suppose I could have spoiled myself, but I gave my trust to the writers and developers to know what they were doing. However, a part of me says that if I had known how it was all going to end, then I would never have started playing these games. Honestly, I avoid these types of endings and stories because I do not prefer them. Power to those that do love them! But I think it's my right, at least as a consumer, to know what I'm getting into, and instead, I felt completely blind-sided. I'm sure that someone can point out where all the signs were, but the tone of all three endings and their "variations" do not fit the overarching theme of the games. (If you want to know what I'm talking about, this article here talks about everything that I mean and more.)
These are the same sorts of issues I had with DA2's ending, except magnified to an unacceptably high degree: if Bioware just wants to tell their own stories, then I wish they would NOT make player CHOICE a SELLING point. I know that the choices are ultimately illusions, but it's the way that illusions are crafted that matter. Like a magician's sleight-of-hand, a single mistake can break the whole illusion, and once the spectator observes that mistake, the illusion can never work for that person again.
At least DA2's ending was honest. There was closure as well, and a promise (or some might say, spoiler bait) for future stories, even if the Warden and Hawke never show up again. There is nothing honest about the handling of "Destroy," "Control," or "Synergy." If there was, then I think that many players would not have so many problems with the endings. I still might, but then, I might not.
This is why I'm ultimately not expecting Bioware to "fix" the endings, as much I want them to do so. If Bioware wanted to give Mass Effect other endings, then they would have done so the first time. When they release more DLC, I speculate it will be for additional missions for players to do before the Cerberus base, or perhaps more appearances, weapons, MP characters/maps/modes, etc. The wound is still open for me, and for other players as well, and I suspect I won't be investing much more money in Bioware games or DLC unless I knew exactly what I was getting. The "indoctrination/hallucination" theories are interesting, but if they were true, I think they'd be much more apparent in the game. Their brilliance would be so blinding as to leave no doubt in our minds. As it is, the lack of closure leaves too much doubt. I don't think anyone's wrong for thinking of them, though, and I myself will also surely be creating new head-canon because of those theories.
My hope truly lies in the development of new narratives, both those where players have actual choices and those where storytellers control the entire direction. If there is any silver lining in this controversy, then it is that it has proven that stories DO matter, even in this seemingly trivial medium. Video games are simply time sinks after all -- I could be doing almost anything else with my time that is productive or more pleasurable. But we play them for hours and hours anyway. We need stories.
I've now met the acquaintances of many people over the multiplayer and over livejournal, and I think that this is my truly favorite part and my reason for choosing to not regret my experiences. I like you guys. I like hearing you laugh at my jokes while a group of us struggle at taking down animated enemies. I like putting an enemy on ice with my infiltrator's cyro blast and having a vanguard shatter that enemy. I also like finding out what values we have in common as people. All these reasons and more are why I'm going to sustain my gold account as long as I can now.
I've been swinging from feeling anger to emptiness over the last twenty-four hours, with no idea on how I will ultimately feel. I know that I won't be asking for my money back, and I won't be asking for apologies. I've got no demands. I do have regrets, which may eventually fade. I'll get back to archiving fanfiction for minor/original characters. I'll be looking for new games to try. And I'll be looking back at all of this.
NaturalParagon, out.
Hmm, I probably haven't written anything new here, but I'm doing this for myself anyway. I haven't written so much for myself personally since my old insanejournal roleplaying days.
I remember when I first played Mass Effect. I was introduced to it by my best friend. Over the course of a sleep-over, she, another friend, and I played through most of the game. We'd skipped most of the side quests, except for many of the ones on the Citadel, and we were swept away by the story. Together, the three of us created a female Shepard, with the first name, Sylvia. She was an Earthborn/Sole Survivor, played as a Renegade. She had short, curly red hair, bright green eyes, and a severe, stubborn look on her face. She was tough and didn't accept any nonsense from anyone. But she softened a little when we met Liara, because it was a novelty for us to see an essentially same-sex romance play out. Sylvia was also, I believe, one of the biotic classes, but because we weren't sure how biotics or the power-wheel worked, we almost never used them. xD
We powered through most of the game. Even though she was tough, she couldn't destroy the rachni or let Wrex die. We got to Ilos, and we flung her through the conduit, and we fought through the Citadel. But we didn't manage to make it to the Council Chambers, because we became exhausted after a whole day and evening playing, and had to quit. Unfortunately, some time after that, my friend lost the saves due to technical difficulties with the console. She thought about replaying Sylvia to the point where we all left off, but she never got around to it, and we had moved on to playing other games together.
But I never forgot how much fun that game was. When I graduated with my bachelor's degree, my parents offered to get me a gift, and I requested an XBOX 360 in order to specifically play Mass Effect eventually. I made my own new Shepard, Jillian, a fierce child of the streets who went out to save Elysium and proved to anyone who ever doubted her that she could overcome her origins. Even though she was born on Earth, she found aliens to be fascinating. You couldn't stop her from wanting and trying to help everyone more or less fortunate than her.
I've been with her across all three games, as I know many other players have seen their Shepards throughout all three games. I have four other, completed Shepards, and some of them have had multiple playthroughs in games one and two. If there had been any solid indication that Mass Effect 3 would end as it did, then why did so many people not see this coming?
Why didn't I see this coming?
I suppose I could have spoiled myself, but I gave my trust to the writers and developers to know what they were doing. However, a part of me says that if I had known how it was all going to end, then I would never have started playing these games. Honestly, I avoid these types of endings and stories because I do not prefer them. Power to those that do love them! But I think it's my right, at least as a consumer, to know what I'm getting into, and instead, I felt completely blind-sided. I'm sure that someone can point out where all the signs were, but the tone of all three endings and their "variations" do not fit the overarching theme of the games. (If you want to know what I'm talking about, this article here talks about everything that I mean and more.)
These are the same sorts of issues I had with DA2's ending, except magnified to an unacceptably high degree: if Bioware just wants to tell their own stories, then I wish they would NOT make player CHOICE a SELLING point. I know that the choices are ultimately illusions, but it's the way that illusions are crafted that matter. Like a magician's sleight-of-hand, a single mistake can break the whole illusion, and once the spectator observes that mistake, the illusion can never work for that person again.
At least DA2's ending was honest. There was closure as well, and a promise (or some might say, spoiler bait) for future stories, even if the Warden and Hawke never show up again. There is nothing honest about the handling of "Destroy," "Control," or "Synergy." If there was, then I think that many players would not have so many problems with the endings. I still might, but then, I might not.
This is why I'm ultimately not expecting Bioware to "fix" the endings, as much I want them to do so. If Bioware wanted to give Mass Effect other endings, then they would have done so the first time. When they release more DLC, I speculate it will be for additional missions for players to do before the Cerberus base, or perhaps more appearances, weapons, MP characters/maps/modes, etc. The wound is still open for me, and for other players as well, and I suspect I won't be investing much more money in Bioware games or DLC unless I knew exactly what I was getting. The "indoctrination/hallucination" theories are interesting, but if they were true, I think they'd be much more apparent in the game. Their brilliance would be so blinding as to leave no doubt in our minds. As it is, the lack of closure leaves too much doubt. I don't think anyone's wrong for thinking of them, though, and I myself will also surely be creating new head-canon because of those theories.
My hope truly lies in the development of new narratives, both those where players have actual choices and those where storytellers control the entire direction. If there is any silver lining in this controversy, then it is that it has proven that stories DO matter, even in this seemingly trivial medium. Video games are simply time sinks after all -- I could be doing almost anything else with my time that is productive or more pleasurable. But we play them for hours and hours anyway. We need stories.
I've now met the acquaintances of many people over the multiplayer and over livejournal, and I think that this is my truly favorite part and my reason for choosing to not regret my experiences. I like you guys. I like hearing you laugh at my jokes while a group of us struggle at taking down animated enemies. I like putting an enemy on ice with my infiltrator's cyro blast and having a vanguard shatter that enemy. I also like finding out what values we have in common as people. All these reasons and more are why I'm going to sustain my gold account as long as I can now.
I've been swinging from feeling anger to emptiness over the last twenty-four hours, with no idea on how I will ultimately feel. I know that I won't be asking for my money back, and I won't be asking for apologies. I've got no demands. I do have regrets, which may eventually fade. I'll get back to archiving fanfiction for minor/original characters. I'll be looking for new games to try. And I'll be looking back at all of this.
NaturalParagon, out.