Cookies are NOT a Sometimes Food
Title: Cookies are NOT a Sometimes Food
Author: nancygrew
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Characters belong to ATWT
Notes: Takes place January 2011. Originally written for the Drabble-a-thon for Lure_atwt.
Summary: Luke and Reid are babysitting Jacob
Luke was curled up in an armchair reading through some reports from the Maritime Commission and ignoring his husband and their nephew-facsimile, Jacob Snyder. Jacob and spent the night with them due to his mother having volunteered to help take care of her friend Henry, who was currently suffering ignobly from chicken pox. As Henry was quick to email to everyone of his acquaintance, chicken pox was not fun for adults. The fact that he had to be quarantined from his beloved wife, Barbara, was the cause for much bad, angst-filled poetry.
Luke glanced up when he heard Reid exclaim in disgust, “This is a crock!”
“Crock!” crowed two year old Jacob who was sitting on Reid’s lap and cuddling Reid’s left arm as though it was a Teddy bear. Jacob was staring intently at the television.
“Is Sesame Street being sponsored today by a letter that you consider intellectually inferior?” asked a confused Luke.
“Were you aware that cookies are now a sometimes food?” asked Reid. “It’s like they neutered Cookie Monster.”
“If you don’t mind, I’m not going to spend any time thinking about the fact that you’ve raised an issue involving Muppet genitalia,” said Luke who immediately winced as he realized that he had referred to genitalia in front of a small child. Since Jacob didn’t react to the mention of the word, Luke let out the breath he was holding. “Do you really have an issue with Sesame Street trying to encourage healthy eating habits in children?”
“If children can handle the ‘Bambi’s mother’ trauma, they can handle the truth that an all-cookie meal is okay for the Cookie Monster but not okay for them,” lectured Reid, in the manner that Luke always thought of as a sexy/pompous tone. “It’s as though the Powers That Be are forcing the Cookie Monster to deny his proud heritage and to conform to the sociological norms of human society. It’s an outrage.”
“Outrage!” crowed Jacob.
Luke smiled and decided to turn his attention back to the reports. “I can’t hear you, I have a banana in my ear.”
“Ha, that’s fitting. You are kind of Ernie-ish, earnest, not the most logical muppet in town--- ”
“Don’t be silly. Ethan is Ernie. I see myself more as a Grover. He cares about stuff so much. And you, of course, are---”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oscar the Grouch, big surprise there.”
“Huh. I was gonna say Jim Henson. The guy controlling everything behind the scenes. Of course, I don’t think he got punched in the face a lot.”
“I haven’t been punched in the face for years.”
“Year and a half, tops,” corrected Luke while he made notes in the margins of a report. “Casey’s Elmo, by the way.”
“Damian’s definitely Count von Count. Snazzy dresser. Hot accent.”
“Someday, maybe for our twentieth wedding anniversary, you could gift me with agreeing to no longer use the word ‘hot’ in relation to any of my parents,” murmured Luke.
“Not my fault you have do-able parents,” shrugged Reid.
“Do-able!” shouted Jacob.
Author: nancygrew
Rating: G
Disclaimer: Characters belong to ATWT
Notes: Takes place January 2011. Originally written for the Drabble-a-thon for Lure_atwt.
Summary: Luke and Reid are babysitting Jacob
Luke was curled up in an armchair reading through some reports from the Maritime Commission and ignoring his husband and their nephew-facsimile, Jacob Snyder. Jacob and spent the night with them due to his mother having volunteered to help take care of her friend Henry, who was currently suffering ignobly from chicken pox. As Henry was quick to email to everyone of his acquaintance, chicken pox was not fun for adults. The fact that he had to be quarantined from his beloved wife, Barbara, was the cause for much bad, angst-filled poetry.
Luke glanced up when he heard Reid exclaim in disgust, “This is a crock!”
“Crock!” crowed two year old Jacob who was sitting on Reid’s lap and cuddling Reid’s left arm as though it was a Teddy bear. Jacob was staring intently at the television.
“Is Sesame Street being sponsored today by a letter that you consider intellectually inferior?” asked a confused Luke.
“Were you aware that cookies are now a sometimes food?” asked Reid. “It’s like they neutered Cookie Monster.”
“If you don’t mind, I’m not going to spend any time thinking about the fact that you’ve raised an issue involving Muppet genitalia,” said Luke who immediately winced as he realized that he had referred to genitalia in front of a small child. Since Jacob didn’t react to the mention of the word, Luke let out the breath he was holding. “Do you really have an issue with Sesame Street trying to encourage healthy eating habits in children?”
“If children can handle the ‘Bambi’s mother’ trauma, they can handle the truth that an all-cookie meal is okay for the Cookie Monster but not okay for them,” lectured Reid, in the manner that Luke always thought of as a sexy/pompous tone. “It’s as though the Powers That Be are forcing the Cookie Monster to deny his proud heritage and to conform to the sociological norms of human society. It’s an outrage.”
“Outrage!” crowed Jacob.
Luke smiled and decided to turn his attention back to the reports. “I can’t hear you, I have a banana in my ear.”
“Ha, that’s fitting. You are kind of Ernie-ish, earnest, not the most logical muppet in town--- ”
“Don’t be silly. Ethan is Ernie. I see myself more as a Grover. He cares about stuff so much. And you, of course, are---”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oscar the Grouch, big surprise there.”
“Huh. I was gonna say Jim Henson. The guy controlling everything behind the scenes. Of course, I don’t think he got punched in the face a lot.”
“I haven’t been punched in the face for years.”
“Year and a half, tops,” corrected Luke while he made notes in the margins of a report. “Casey’s Elmo, by the way.”
“Damian’s definitely Count von Count. Snazzy dresser. Hot accent.”
“Someday, maybe for our twentieth wedding anniversary, you could gift me with agreeing to no longer use the word ‘hot’ in relation to any of my parents,” murmured Luke.
“Not my fault you have do-able parents,” shrugged Reid.
“Do-able!” shouted Jacob.