brotherhood
Title: Brotherhood
Rating: PG
Pairing: OT5
Word count: 1244
A/N: A little something I wrote on August 19th of this past year; I hope no one minds me using Daesung's accident. ^^
It comes every year, but the emotions they feel on that day remain the same. Like the week leading up to a birthday, the countdown to this special occasion is one teeming with excitement. With happiness and pride. They never congratulate each other with words or gifts; it’s not necessary. Just one look says it all: “We’ve made it one more year. Let’s try for many more.”
This year, though, the emotions surrounding Big Bang’s anniversary are a bit different. Though two months have passed since Daesung’s accident, the members feel the effects as if it was just yesterday. Daesung still mourns for the deceased, guilt weighing down his shoulders. As a leader, Jiyong pains for his member and as a man, he weeps for his friend. Seunghyun and Youngbae are no better; as the two oldest members, they ache to help him, but are at a loss about what to say to make it right. And Seungri wants to do something, anything to see the hyung he always looked up to smile again; but, how can he do that when he can’t even seem to find it inside himself to do so?
There’s no doubt that the members are happy to complete one more year hand in hand. But, what are they celebrating when in that year, such tragedy struck their dearest friend? This is the question hanging over their heads as they go on about their day as normal. YG gives them the day off, but Youngbae and Jiyong end up spending most of it at the studio anyway. Seungri convinces Seunghyun to see a movie with him and despite their best efforts, Daesung decides to stay at home, preferring to spend his day reflecting just as he had many days before.
Slowly, that reflection turns to daydreaming and that to gentle sleep. A few hours later, he awakes to the sound of soft murmurs and shuffling coming from outside. He turns to look at the clock and is shocked to see it reads 8:00PM. “I must have been more tired than I thought,” he mutters to himself as he stands from his bed and stretches. Heading out into the living room, he’s surprised to see all four members have returned home before midnight. “Ah, welcome home,” he says softly, studying the scene before him. They’re all surrounding the coffee table which is covered with envelopes and wrapped gifts.
“Ah, Daesung-hyung, I was just about to go get you. We’re reading fan letters,” Seungri explains as he waves the older man over and pats the cushion next to him. “I saved you a seat.”
Daesung smiles genuinely and nods. “Alright.” He steps over Seunghyun’s legs to settle in the open spot next to Seungri, who turns to Jiyong and urges him to begin reading the next one.
“Well, since Daesung-ah came out, I think I’ll read one addressed to him.” Jiyong searches through the pile for a moment before pulling out a very simple white and gold envelope. Unlike the other letters, there is no name or address. It simply reads ‘To Kang Daesung.’ Jiyong tears the flap and pulls the letter out, reading immediately. “Dear Daesung-oppa,” he starts, “I’ve been a fan of yours since the very first day you and the rest of Big Bang stepped onto the stage at Se7en-oppa’s concert…”
The fan letters lead to memoirs and for the first time in a long time, genuine laughter fills the Big Bang home. During the reminiscing, Jiyong brings out some drinks for himself and Seunghyun, and at Seungri’s constant prodding, he gets one for the maknae as well. Seunghyun chuckles at Seungri’s eagerness to drink. “You better not get drunk and confuse Jiyong for a girl again,” he teases.
Jiyong shudders. “I thought we were never going to speak of that again,” he groans out, the mere memory enough to make him feel sick.
Seungri nods. “It was my first time drinking anyway; I’ve gotten a lot better since then, hyung.” As if to make his point, Seungri chugs down his first beer and slams the can down, announcing he’s ready for another.
Youngbae chuckles and shakes his head, a glass of water dangling in his left hand. “This is going to be quite interesting.”
All the while, Daesung stays completely silent. As he watches the members joke and laugh, he lets out a heavy sigh and stares blankly at his hands. He knows that up to now, the lack of energy and laughter in the house has been due to him; they’d taken his pain and made it their own as well. But, is that he wanted them to do? Did he want them to suffer because of his problems, his mistakes? He knows that regardless of what police reports show or what the family says, there are antis who will never let this accident rest; he’s ready for the criticisms and the hurtful remarks that will surely follow him wherever he may go. But, did he want his members to have to suffer that same fate? He lets out another sigh. It’s these thoughts that make him think that maybe, just maybe, leaving Big Bang would be the right thing to do.
He looks back up to see Seunghyun staring at him, studying him. The one thing that Daesung hates and loves about his hyung is the way he can read his mind. Daesung never has to say a word and Seunghyun already knows the whole story. Of course, it comes in handy when Daesung can’t find the will to share his feelings; but when he wants to hide things, it’s the most frustrating thing in the world. He already knows that Seunghyun’s aware of the thoughts running through his mind; it’s clear in the way he’s watching the younger man. The pain in his hyung’s eyes causes Daesung to choke up and he looks away, zoning back into the conversation in an effort to ignore the stare.
The alcohol in Seungri’s system has taken its toll and he’s completely drunk, rambling about this and that. Sometime during the conversation, he’d left Daesung’s side and managed to wedge himself in between Jiyong and Seunghyun on the other couch. Cutting off his musings about college noonas, he lifts his head from Seunghyun’s shoulder and stares at the clock. “Ah,” he starts, “it’s 11:11, hyung, look. Make a wish, hyung, make a wish!” He squirms in his seat giddily, causing each of his hyungs to chuckle in amusement. “I already know what I want to wish for,” he slurs, his eyelids drooping as he fights to stay awake. “I…I want to be five members forever, hyung,” Seungri mumbles drunkenly as he drifts into a peaceful slumber.
Upon hearing the youngest member’s words, Seunghyun looks up pointedly at Daesung, who stares back with teary eyes. “Me too, Seungri-ah. Forever.”
Daesung looks down at his hands again and shakes his head with a small smile. ‘How could I be so foolish,’ he thinks to himself. The roads are always going to be bumpy, but as long as he has these four by his side, he knows he can make it through any and every thing life throws at him. Though he rarely drinks, Daesung finds himself taking the last unopened can of beer and pouring it into an empty glass. He raises it for all the members to see and smiles brightly. “Here’s to one more year,” he says, “with my brothers.”
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Rating: PG
Pairing: OT5
Word count: 1244
A/N: A little something I wrote on August 19th of this past year; I hope no one minds me using Daesung's accident. ^^
It comes every year, but the emotions they feel on that day remain the same. Like the week leading up to a birthday, the countdown to this special occasion is one teeming with excitement. With happiness and pride. They never congratulate each other with words or gifts; it’s not necessary. Just one look says it all: “We’ve made it one more year. Let’s try for many more.”
This year, though, the emotions surrounding Big Bang’s anniversary are a bit different. Though two months have passed since Daesung’s accident, the members feel the effects as if it was just yesterday. Daesung still mourns for the deceased, guilt weighing down his shoulders. As a leader, Jiyong pains for his member and as a man, he weeps for his friend. Seunghyun and Youngbae are no better; as the two oldest members, they ache to help him, but are at a loss about what to say to make it right. And Seungri wants to do something, anything to see the hyung he always looked up to smile again; but, how can he do that when he can’t even seem to find it inside himself to do so?
There’s no doubt that the members are happy to complete one more year hand in hand. But, what are they celebrating when in that year, such tragedy struck their dearest friend? This is the question hanging over their heads as they go on about their day as normal. YG gives them the day off, but Youngbae and Jiyong end up spending most of it at the studio anyway. Seungri convinces Seunghyun to see a movie with him and despite their best efforts, Daesung decides to stay at home, preferring to spend his day reflecting just as he had many days before.
Slowly, that reflection turns to daydreaming and that to gentle sleep. A few hours later, he awakes to the sound of soft murmurs and shuffling coming from outside. He turns to look at the clock and is shocked to see it reads 8:00PM. “I must have been more tired than I thought,” he mutters to himself as he stands from his bed and stretches. Heading out into the living room, he’s surprised to see all four members have returned home before midnight. “Ah, welcome home,” he says softly, studying the scene before him. They’re all surrounding the coffee table which is covered with envelopes and wrapped gifts.
“Ah, Daesung-hyung, I was just about to go get you. We’re reading fan letters,” Seungri explains as he waves the older man over and pats the cushion next to him. “I saved you a seat.”
Daesung smiles genuinely and nods. “Alright.” He steps over Seunghyun’s legs to settle in the open spot next to Seungri, who turns to Jiyong and urges him to begin reading the next one.
“Well, since Daesung-ah came out, I think I’ll read one addressed to him.” Jiyong searches through the pile for a moment before pulling out a very simple white and gold envelope. Unlike the other letters, there is no name or address. It simply reads ‘To Kang Daesung.’ Jiyong tears the flap and pulls the letter out, reading immediately. “Dear Daesung-oppa,” he starts, “I’ve been a fan of yours since the very first day you and the rest of Big Bang stepped onto the stage at Se7en-oppa’s concert…”
The fan letters lead to memoirs and for the first time in a long time, genuine laughter fills the Big Bang home. During the reminiscing, Jiyong brings out some drinks for himself and Seunghyun, and at Seungri’s constant prodding, he gets one for the maknae as well. Seunghyun chuckles at Seungri’s eagerness to drink. “You better not get drunk and confuse Jiyong for a girl again,” he teases.
Jiyong shudders. “I thought we were never going to speak of that again,” he groans out, the mere memory enough to make him feel sick.
Seungri nods. “It was my first time drinking anyway; I’ve gotten a lot better since then, hyung.” As if to make his point, Seungri chugs down his first beer and slams the can down, announcing he’s ready for another.
Youngbae chuckles and shakes his head, a glass of water dangling in his left hand. “This is going to be quite interesting.”
All the while, Daesung stays completely silent. As he watches the members joke and laugh, he lets out a heavy sigh and stares blankly at his hands. He knows that up to now, the lack of energy and laughter in the house has been due to him; they’d taken his pain and made it their own as well. But, is that he wanted them to do? Did he want them to suffer because of his problems, his mistakes? He knows that regardless of what police reports show or what the family says, there are antis who will never let this accident rest; he’s ready for the criticisms and the hurtful remarks that will surely follow him wherever he may go. But, did he want his members to have to suffer that same fate? He lets out another sigh. It’s these thoughts that make him think that maybe, just maybe, leaving Big Bang would be the right thing to do.
He looks back up to see Seunghyun staring at him, studying him. The one thing that Daesung hates and loves about his hyung is the way he can read his mind. Daesung never has to say a word and Seunghyun already knows the whole story. Of course, it comes in handy when Daesung can’t find the will to share his feelings; but when he wants to hide things, it’s the most frustrating thing in the world. He already knows that Seunghyun’s aware of the thoughts running through his mind; it’s clear in the way he’s watching the younger man. The pain in his hyung’s eyes causes Daesung to choke up and he looks away, zoning back into the conversation in an effort to ignore the stare.
The alcohol in Seungri’s system has taken its toll and he’s completely drunk, rambling about this and that. Sometime during the conversation, he’d left Daesung’s side and managed to wedge himself in between Jiyong and Seunghyun on the other couch. Cutting off his musings about college noonas, he lifts his head from Seunghyun’s shoulder and stares at the clock. “Ah,” he starts, “it’s 11:11, hyung, look. Make a wish, hyung, make a wish!” He squirms in his seat giddily, causing each of his hyungs to chuckle in amusement. “I already know what I want to wish for,” he slurs, his eyelids drooping as he fights to stay awake. “I…I want to be five members forever, hyung,” Seungri mumbles drunkenly as he drifts into a peaceful slumber.
Upon hearing the youngest member’s words, Seunghyun looks up pointedly at Daesung, who stares back with teary eyes. “Me too, Seungri-ah. Forever.”
Daesung looks down at his hands again and shakes his head with a small smile. ‘How could I be so foolish,’ he thinks to himself. The roads are always going to be bumpy, but as long as he has these four by his side, he knows he can make it through any and every thing life throws at him. Though he rarely drinks, Daesung finds himself taking the last unopened can of beer and pouring it into an empty glass. He raises it for all the members to see and smiles brightly. “Here’s to one more year,” he says, “with my brothers.”
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