El Mar.

[liberta]

Title: El Mar
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: David Silva/David Villa
Disclaimer: I made this shit up and don't claim it has ever happened. I also don't claim these people are really gay, AFAIK they are not.
Warning: If you're afraid of reading swearing and romance, don't bother to ever come back to this journal.
Summary: A variation on a theme.
Beta'd by ashirbaad

Comments

[nazgul5]

God I've missed reading your stuff.

Beautiful.

[liberta]

Thank you so much! I miss yours too *poke poke*

[liberta]

:D My pleasure! Thanks for reading and liking! <3

[kat_lys]

This is gorgeous and I love your choice of words to evocate their relationship.

with casual abandon betraying their real emotions (hiding that all-searched pathetic magic love, under layers and layers of self-assuredness and tissue-thin lies, status quos and seething want)
♥

[liberta]

:D Thank you! <3

[art_blake]

This was really enchanting and I thank you for the salty sea scent that I seem to be really breathing in right now. I loved how you described the both sides of their relationship: their own secret world of love and comfort, and the intruding outside one, with its girls, goals, watermelons and pretends.

If you're interested in some concrit, then I'd really change the 'fucked' into 'made love' because it's far too rude and for me, it almost destroyed the tender and romantic atmosphere you created beforehand.

♥

[liberta]

I'm always interested in concrit, and to be honest I was unsure about that bit too - I'm such a sentimental cheezy person and thus always a bit afraid of making my stories too sappy and OTT cheezy; that's why I'm probably sometimes too harsh in the other direction XD

I'm happy that these few words did make the scene feel real to you :) Thank you for your comment!

[life_valencia]

SO BEAUTIFUL!

is that weird that i was remembering while i was reading the smell and taste of the sea... i think it isn´t since you wrote it in a way we can feel everything like they were alive, you gave beautiful colors to such beautiful love!

LOVE IT!
<333333

p.s: your icon! *dies*

[liberta]

Whee I'm so happy it turned out well! Thank you!

And that icon is yum indeed... made by pressao, whose icons pwn :P