Mythbuster Quotes Inside - updated 8/29/08
"This is where the danger zone happens. When nothing happens for a while, everyone's like, 'Let's get closer. Let's get closer. Let's get closer. Boom! And everyone's dead." - Adam
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Tori: What the hell is that thing?
Adam: It's the disco mirror from hell.
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"I am satisfied and filthy. Two of my favorite states." - Adam
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"Yet another common, everyday item turned deadly." - Jaime
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"This kills you, this kills you and everyone else in the room." - Adam (talking about the difference in size of the bullets for the M1 Grand and the 50 calliber.)
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"Well hopefully that's our job, to strap rockets onto everything." - Adam
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"This ingredient is made of blur. Hah. And this has some blur in it too. Blur is very dangerous. You don't want to mix blur with blur." - Adam
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"Next up on Discovery, the world's deadliest pinata." - Adam
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"This is one of the most wrongity, wrong things we've ever done." - Adam
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"Get in the car and show me what you got cheater." - Adam
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"Oh, Tori, are we gonna ever have an episode where you don't hurt yourself?" - Kari
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"Does somebody wanna get a 2x4, just in case they need to knock us apart?" - Tori
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Tori: Grant, do you know how long we've wanted one of these?
Grant: Yes.
Tori: And I don't mean a box.
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Grant: Plants kinda twitching.
Tori: Cause he knows what's coming.
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"If you run into a Hyneman in your house, do not taunt the Hyneman. It's not safe." - Adam
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"Just remember, the Hyneman's just as afraid of you as you are of the Hyneman." - Adam
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"That's true. Can I go away now?" - Jaime
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"Stop sparking my ass!" - Adam
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"Tub of body latex, $22.00. Tub of gold pigment, $6.00. Watching your friend get naked, covered with gold paint, and then jogging until he passes out...Priceless." - Adam
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Jaime: I think I'm in fact, just gonna leave mine totally uncovered.
Adam: [to the camera] Oh really?
Jaime: And I'm gonna kick your goldfish ass.
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"Adam just got stupid fish, what are you gonna do?" - Jaime
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"Don't mess with me duck. When I say quack, you're gonna quack right? I'm the boss here. Don't give me any beak." - Jaime
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"Quack, damn you." - Jaime
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Narrator: As the team bunker down in the bunker, there's time for an expert prediction from Jaime.
Jaime: What the [bleep] do I know what kind of coverage it's going to do?
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"Do me a favor, try not to do that when it's loaded." - Kari
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Adam: So that sounds totally definitive. I will alert the Discovery webmaster for the onslaught of complaints that you screwed it up somehow.
Tori: That sounds perfect.
Grant: Yep, they know where to find us.
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Adam: Are you gonna say anything but 'Yep'?
Jaime: Mmmhmm.
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Jaime: Well, like, beavers eat wood. That's sort of a wood product.
Adam: Do I look like a beaver to you?
Jaime: Sometimes.
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Jaime: [pointing in the direction of the balloon floating away in the sky.] It's going that way.
Adam: [laughs] You're a budding meterologist, Jaime.
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Jaime: Jaime wants big boom.
Adam: [laughing] Down boy, down boy.
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"And the fact is they can search the database by as many letters as they can see on your license plate. They're got you. In fact, this would piss me off enough to come and find you." - Adam
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Adam: You know, now we get to find out definitively just how clean your shop is.
Jaime: It's a shop. What do you want?
Adam: I want to be able to eat off the damn floor. What's my immune system for anyway?
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"For some reason, whenever I see pans, I have the desire to smash them on my head. You ready? See if I can get a perfect face print." - Adam
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Adam: I know I love building big things and blowing stuff up, but this is super, super fun.
Jaime: [completely ignoring him] Okay, fishing out a new one.
Adam: He doesn't care.
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Adam: Stop french-kissing dogs, I think, is our conclusion here.
Jaime: I would be more inclined to say, no french-kissing Adam.
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Adam: Killer quicksand. Is that why I'm standing here in this stupid pith helmet?
Jaime: No, you're standing there in a stupid pith helmet because you're an idiot.
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"I always enjoy seeing Adam in pain." - Jaime
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"One way or another, we're going to blow up that damn toilet." - Jaime
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"That's all I need is another dummy around this place." - Jaime
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"You know, when you start to get dizzy, it's probably time to leave." - Adam
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"I was raised up on a farm. Thems varmit bullets." - Jaime
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Jaime: That's right. You've got some kind of bogus minister thing.
Adam: It's not a bogus ministry. I've performed a dozen weddings already.
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Adam: And even if we fail, do we still get to blow something up?
Jaime: Oh yeah.
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"No stop spinning like this. Throw me into the shop." - Adam
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Adam: Okay, am I about to feel really, really stupid?
Jaime: Probably.
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"Okay this is where I'm supposed to say 'Hiyo silver', but I'm not gonna." - Jaime
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"I think I might of done twice as much damage to my foot." - Tori
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"It just goes to show, do not grab the third rail with both hands and piss on it from three inches away." - Adam
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"That'll never make it into the show." - Adam
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"Adam will use any excuse to run around in his undies, I think." - Jaime
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"I wanna get the hell off this crane." - Jaime
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"He's just not aware of half the things he's doing." - Jaime [on Adam]
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"I reject your reality and substitute my own." - Adam
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"You should never try anything like this, unless you have your own television show." - Adam
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"I just had one of those 'what the hell are we doing' moments." - Adam
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Producer: Why don't you try to be more like Adam?
Jaime: What, do you mean stupid?
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"I'm not going to close it, because he's going to lock me in here." - Adam
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Jaime: I don't like the pink. It's a little creepy.
Adam: Yeah it's a little creepy but, so is what we do to Buster.
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Adam: So it's time to get those vocal cords ready.
Jaime: You think I can yodel?
Adam: I know you can.
Jaime: You think I'm going to yodel?
Adam: No I don't.
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"That's given me a headache. I can't imagine what it's doing to you." - Adam
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"We're very lucky out here in the wild. We've see a Hyneman in his natural habitat. Let's be quiet. They scare very easily." - Adam
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"Oh, man, it looks like he went down ass first. I think he's got, like avalanche up his butt." - Jaime
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"Well, Jaime, once again, we've proved something radical on Mythbusters - That skunks apparently don't spray and you can't piss them off." - Adam
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"It's wearing off really fast. I mean, either that or I'm getting used to it, which is really disturbing." - Adam
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Adam: I think we've created another myth here, Jaime.
Jaime: That skunks won't spray Mythbusters?
Adam: Exactly.
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"I wouldn't say Jaime's an evil genius. I'm not sure he's evil, and I'm not sure he's a genius." - Adam
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"If you want to play with the big toys, apparently you have to get up really early in the morning." - Adam
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"I kind of like it in here. It's private." - Jaime
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"The pad screwed me." - Adam
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"Don't tell 'em which ones we have." - Adam
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"It's just amazing to me that you still don't realize we're shooting a T.V. show." - Adam
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"Now remember the safety word is run." - Kari
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Grant: So you named your guy there?
Tori: Yes.
Grant: What did you name him?
Tori: Pork-Loinio.
Kari: You did not.
Tori: He is an evil pig...man.
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Tori: Frank, why are you standing so far away?
Frank: Because I want to continue to live.
Tori: So the next question is, why am I standing so close?
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"So are you ready for a giant fallout cloud of badness?" - Kari
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"It's funny what gets us excited, isn't it?" - Jaime
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"Damn this is a sexy machine!" - Adam
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"I'm uncomfortable with all this contact with your groin." - Adam
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"If I don't see you again, I love you." - Adam
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"[bleep], I keep forgetting that you're like, actually have no soul." - Adam
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"But the police are coming, so let's wrap up and get out of here." - Adam
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"This is like a really cool sadistic play house." - Adam
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Tori: Is this as disturbing as I think it is?
Grant: It's even more disturbing than you think it is.
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"I think we've learned what we wanted to know, although Jaime still seems to be enjoying setting stuff on fire." - Adam
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Adam: There's women out there who're going, 'Oh, I wish I was that piece of tape right now.'
Jaime: You think?
Adam: [laughing] I'm sure of it. Raise your hand. Yeah, you.
Jaime: Give me a break.
Narrator: The producers of 'Mythbusters' are not responsible for any marital issues resulting from raised arms.
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"Who's done this before? Nobody!" - Adam
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"Does anybody find it creepy how many 'Grant Robots' have been on the show? Is it just me, or is he trying to like clone himself and make a little army?" - Kari
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"Well, that's what we do on Mythbusters is we take large objects and make them into very small objects." - Jaime
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Jaime: Where'd it go? It's all gone. There's no more truck.
Adam: I swear I left it right here. [laughs] Mythbusters - 1, Cement truck - 0.
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"This has got nothing to do with the myth. That's just a big boom." - Jaime
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"Now I know what it'll be like when I finally get arrested." - Jaime
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"Oh, I've got a hot ember on my crotch!" - Adam
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"I think Jaime's going to be like, doink, doink, doink. And I believe in the security manual, the proper response to that sound coming from your duct is to just riddle your duct with bullets." - Adam