Hospital Horror
Yesterday I had to go in for a Bubble Exam. My cardiologist seems to still believe I have a hole in my heart, and this is the source of all my trouble. What the test does is shows the flow patter in my heart. It is shown by injecting aggravated saline into an IV, and seeing where the bubbles went. If they stayed completely in the left side of my heart there was no hole. If any went into the right side, there was a hole. Sounds simple, right? It should have been. Let me tell you what actually went down.
The first nurse I had reminded me so much of Mackie that, as I texted her, I had a hard time not expressing my undying love to her. The guy who was going to be doing the ultrsound was really nice, explaining everything that was going to happen. I must have blanched at the mention of the IV because he asked if I was okay, so that was nice. The nurse who came in to do my IV was really sweet, very gentle...and completely should not even have been allowed to do that job.
First she tried the IV in the side of my wrist. I have never ever heard of an IV going there, so I was freaking out. For as many times as I've had blood taken and even IVs put in, you'd think I'd be a little more chill about all of this. No, not really. I was clutching my watch so tightly that my knuckles were white. And let me tell you, side of the wrist hurts like a...something. Especially when she tries it three times over before deciding that vein isn't good enough, and let's try the top of the hand instead.
It went in much easier there, except she forgot to cap it and my hand was quickly covered in my own blood. Needless to say, I almost passed out. I am honestly quite surprised that I did not. So then she's got to inject the IV with this aggravated saline...meaning there were bubbles in it. The saline was passed quickly between two syringes to get it nice and bubbly. Except she was doing it so slowly that is was kind of pointless. Plus, the first time she put it in, nothing went into the IV but more of my blood came squirting out.
"Well, I am just making such a mess this morning!"
Yes, yes you are. WITH MY BLOOD, WOMAN!
So the ultrasound guy was like, "You gotta do it really quickly so the bubbles actually get in there. They dissipate pretty quickly. You can actually do it a couple more times while it's in the IV. So she does this, and it goes in. I saw the screen and didn't think anything traveled into the right chamber, but I'll wait until a professional tells me as much. He asked if she had enough to do one more. She said yes, and tried again. It was a repeat of the first time. More blood, more "Oopsies!" The guy was like, "Ithinkweregood!" So I was grateful to him for saying that, ending my torture, but really praying there was enough footage with that one actual shot for Dr. P to make a solid decision.
The rest of it wasn't bad at all. I've had ultrasounds of my heart done since I was three. "Did you know your pulmonary valve..." "Yep. It's almost as big as a lemon. Think I could get anything at the market?" "How long have you had this murmur?" "Since I was born. It's my inner voice." Ba dum bum!
So, after getting dressed and cleaning myself up a bit more than Nurse hatchet could, I went down in the lobby to sit for two hour and try not to cry. Most of the time I was successful, some of the time I was not. For the most part I was able to wait until I got home to have a good sob.
I HATE BLOOOOOOODDDDDD! Ugh, just remembering it gives me the willies!
The first nurse I had reminded me so much of Mackie that, as I texted her, I had a hard time not expressing my undying love to her. The guy who was going to be doing the ultrsound was really nice, explaining everything that was going to happen. I must have blanched at the mention of the IV because he asked if I was okay, so that was nice. The nurse who came in to do my IV was really sweet, very gentle...and completely should not even have been allowed to do that job.
First she tried the IV in the side of my wrist. I have never ever heard of an IV going there, so I was freaking out. For as many times as I've had blood taken and even IVs put in, you'd think I'd be a little more chill about all of this. No, not really. I was clutching my watch so tightly that my knuckles were white. And let me tell you, side of the wrist hurts like a...something. Especially when she tries it three times over before deciding that vein isn't good enough, and let's try the top of the hand instead.
It went in much easier there, except she forgot to cap it and my hand was quickly covered in my own blood. Needless to say, I almost passed out. I am honestly quite surprised that I did not. So then she's got to inject the IV with this aggravated saline...meaning there were bubbles in it. The saline was passed quickly between two syringes to get it nice and bubbly. Except she was doing it so slowly that is was kind of pointless. Plus, the first time she put it in, nothing went into the IV but more of my blood came squirting out.
"Well, I am just making such a mess this morning!"
Yes, yes you are. WITH MY BLOOD, WOMAN!
So the ultrasound guy was like, "You gotta do it really quickly so the bubbles actually get in there. They dissipate pretty quickly. You can actually do it a couple more times while it's in the IV. So she does this, and it goes in. I saw the screen and didn't think anything traveled into the right chamber, but I'll wait until a professional tells me as much. He asked if she had enough to do one more. She said yes, and tried again. It was a repeat of the first time. More blood, more "Oopsies!" The guy was like, "Ithinkweregood!" So I was grateful to him for saying that, ending my torture, but really praying there was enough footage with that one actual shot for Dr. P to make a solid decision.
The rest of it wasn't bad at all. I've had ultrasounds of my heart done since I was three. "Did you know your pulmonary valve..." "Yep. It's almost as big as a lemon. Think I could get anything at the market?" "How long have you had this murmur?" "Since I was born. It's my inner voice." Ba dum bum!
So, after getting dressed and cleaning myself up a bit more than Nurse hatchet could, I went down in the lobby to sit for two hour and try not to cry. Most of the time I was successful, some of the time I was not. For the most part I was able to wait until I got home to have a good sob.
I HATE BLOOOOOOODDDDDD! Ugh, just remembering it gives me the willies!