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Ed and Hank
Part 3: Saturday Night
By myeyesaintblue
Genre: Non-Fiction
Pairing: Ed & Hank
Rating: PG13 - R(?)
Length: ~1,100 words
Disclaimer: I know somewhere out there is a guy named Ed and a guy named Hank who at some point in their lives met the amazing Ms. Proulx and told them their story. Jack and Ennis belong entirely to Ms. Proulx. Technically, so do Ed and Hank.
P.S. I’m making millions off of this. Have it all hidden in a Swiss bank account.
Feedback: Greatly appreciated.
Part 2: Saturday Morning is here: http://myeyesaintblue.livejournal.com/698.html
Part 1: Friday Night is here: http://myeyesaintblue.livejournal.com/456.html
Links to all other parts and assorted interludes, postcards, etc, are here:
http://myeyesaintblue.livejournal.com/10082.html
****************************
Part 3, Saturday Night
“Hank… Hank…” Ed groaned, his body glistening with sweat, “Hank… Ma leg don’ bend tha’ way. Ow.” “Sorry Ed, le’ me move…” “Shit, now it’s m’arm.” “Okay. Ow. Wait…” “Don think tha’s gonna work either…can’t reach from here…how long ya think ma dick is, anyway?” “S’always been long enou’ before, Ed…” “Nooo, don’ make me laugh, it’ll make it worse” “Okay, le’ me try movin’ this way…”
“Hank?”
“Yeah, Ed?”
“Think I’m stuck.”
At that they both collapsed on the bed laughing.
“Thought we was gonna ha’ ta call 911 fer a minute there.”
“Tha’ sure woulda got the whole town talkin’” Ed said, still laughing and gasping for air, “Don’ think whoe’er wrote tha’ ever tried it . Why’d ya pick tha’ one anyway?”
“Saturday night. Wanted somethin’ special.”
“Well, tha’ was special alright,” Ed groaned again, “Shit. Couldn’ we a jus’ picked up a pizza ‘n rented a movie or gone ta a movie in town? That’d be special enough fer me.”
“Watcha wanna see?”
“I dunno,” Ed teased, “maybe somethin’ with tha’ Jake fella in it.”
“Gotta crush, ol’ man? Know one movie he’s in fer sure.”
“Okay. Ya got me. Anythin’ but tha’ one.”
“Y’ ever gonna see it?”
“Nope.” Ed quickly changed the subject, “Hey, almos’ forgot, when do I get ta read yer story?”
“Our story. Left it on the kitchen table with yer readin’ glasses ‘n a piece a apple pie. Know ya cain’t sleep sometimes… figured if ya got up ya could read it then. Otherwise it’ll still be there in the mornin’.”
“Thanks, bud. Sweet a ya.” Ed wrapped his arm around Hank and pulled him close, “Hey, Hank?”
“Yeah?”
“Ya ain’t gonna write ‘bout tonigh’, are ya?”
“Probably.”
“Shit.”
“Night Cowboy, Love ya.”
Ed sighed resignedly, then whispered, “Night Rodeo, Love you too.”
------------------------------
A couple of minutes later:
------------------------------
“Hey Ed, ya ‘sleep yet?
“Nah, think I migh’ be dead tho’. If yer gonna keep readin’ them stories we might ha’ to get one a them defibrillator things ta keep nex’ ta the bed.”
“Can I ask ya somethin’ then?”
“’Course ya can.” Ed said, feeling a bit apprehensive at how serious Hank sounded.
“When we, uh… you know… do y’ever preten’ I look like Jack? Do y’ever wish I was good lookin’ with blue eyes like tha”?
…………Silence…………..
“Ed, didya hear me?”
“Yeah, I heard ya. I’m just tryin’ to think back over the las’ forty odd years as ta whether ya ever asked me a dumber question.”
“Know it sounds dumb, short story never made me feel this way, those guys didn’ sound all tha’ attractive, knew she changed their looks ta protect us, but them guys in the movie… damn… ‘n now all them stories makin’ such a big deal ‘bout how beautiful Jack is, havin’ them piercin’ blue eyes ‘n all. I know I’m not…I thought maybe…”
“Nobody really looks like tha’ Rodeo, not in real life. In the movies they do it all wi’ lightin’ ‘n mirrors. Dim lightin’ ‘n lots a mirrors… ‘n smoke, sometimes they use smoke.”
“C’mon, be serious.”
Ed sighed and turned towards Hank, “O.K., I’ll be honest with ya, but ya migh’ not like it.”
“Shit,” Hank thought, “What kinda can a worms did I open? Shoulda jus’ kep ma mouth shut.”
“When I first laid eyes on ya I thought to m’self, ‘y’know tha’ boy’d be perfec’ ifn’ only he had blue eyes’. Been eatin’ away at me for years. Nearly had a fit when they cast a blue-eyed boy as Jack. Almos’ left ya ta chase after ‘im. Thought ‘bout askin’ ya ta get some a them colored contac’ lenses. Maybe we can go inta town Monday…..”
“Asshole”, Hank laughed and threw himself on top of Ed, pinning Ed’s arms beside his head.
“Ya ain’t havin’ some kinda mid-life crisis on me now, are ya, bud? What with readin’ all them stories ‘n now startin’ to write ours? Wouldn’ it jus’ be easier ta buy a new truck? Or maybe I could jus’ getcha a puppy? Tha’ seems ta work wonders in some a them stories.”
Hank grinned at the puppy reference, but he could sense the concern behind Ed’s teasing words, “Nah, don’ think ‘m havin’ a mid-life crisis. The movie ‘n all them stories jus’ make me think ‘bout stuff is all. Think ‘bout us. So many ways it coulda played out. Makes me feel like we mighta dodged a lot a bullets.”
“Think I know whatcha mean, Hank. Weren’t no bed a roses fer us. But it played out this way. And it ended up good. Real good.” Ed thought for a bit, then went on, “People writn’ them stories dealin’ with a real sad story ‘n a real mean world, ‘n sometimes they jus’ can’t let Jack ‘n Ennis escape themselves or tha’ world. Truth is, world’s still like tha’ in a lot a ways ‘n in a lot a places.”
“Ya turnin’ into a philosopher now Ed?”
“Nah. All them stories jus’ makin’ me think too.”
Thanks Ed. Know ya still have a hard time talkin’ ‘bout this stuff. I do too sometimes - embarrassed ta let ya read wha’ I wrote.”
Don’ ha’ no cause to be embarrassed ‘bout anythin’ ya write, Hank." Ed paused, then grinned, “’Cept maybe if ya write ‘bout wha’ we was doin earlier… now that would be embarrassin’.”
Hank kissed Ed’s neck and laughed, “Yeah, tha’s the other thing them stories are about.”
“Hey, Rodeo”
“Yeah, Cowboy?”
“Ya know I think yer ‘bout the best lookin’ man I e’er laid eyes on, dontcha?.”
Hank smiled and leaned down, brushing his lips against Ed’s, “Backatcha, Cowboy.” Hank’s lips pressed down more urgently, his tongue… “Wait a minute…’Bout the best lookin’?”
Ed grinned, “Well, there’s that Tyler fella from tha’ one story…’n I always kinda had a thing for Clint Eastwood… ‘n then there’s that fella from Lonesome Dove….”
“Jeez, Cowboy, thought ya weren’t queer. Sure admire a lot a men fer a guy who aint queer.”
“I aint queer.” Ed said with a frown, “Am a little worried tho’.”
“’Bout what?”
Ed suddenly pulled his arms free and grabbed Hank, rolling him onto his back and kissing him briefly but deeply, until Hank moaned. Then looking first to the left and then to the right, Ed whispered conspiratorially in Hank’s ear, “Think I migh’ be gay.”
---
Part 3: Saturday Night
By myeyesaintblue
Genre: Non-Fiction
Pairing: Ed & Hank
Rating: PG13 - R(?)
Length: ~1,100 words
Disclaimer: I know somewhere out there is a guy named Ed and a guy named Hank who at some point in their lives met the amazing Ms. Proulx and told them their story. Jack and Ennis belong entirely to Ms. Proulx. Technically, so do Ed and Hank.
P.S. I’m making millions off of this. Have it all hidden in a Swiss bank account.
Feedback: Greatly appreciated.
Part 2: Saturday Morning is here: http://myeyesaintblue.livejournal.com/698.html
Part 1: Friday Night is here: http://myeyesaintblue.livejournal.com/456.html
Links to all other parts and assorted interludes, postcards, etc, are here:
http://myeyesaintblue.livejournal.com/10082.html
****************************
Part 3, Saturday Night
“Hank… Hank…” Ed groaned, his body glistening with sweat, “Hank… Ma leg don’ bend tha’ way. Ow.” “Sorry Ed, le’ me move…” “Shit, now it’s m’arm.” “Okay. Ow. Wait…” “Don think tha’s gonna work either…can’t reach from here…how long ya think ma dick is, anyway?” “S’always been long enou’ before, Ed…” “Nooo, don’ make me laugh, it’ll make it worse” “Okay, le’ me try movin’ this way…”
“Hank?”
“Yeah, Ed?”
“Think I’m stuck.”
At that they both collapsed on the bed laughing.
“Thought we was gonna ha’ ta call 911 fer a minute there.”
“Tha’ sure woulda got the whole town talkin’” Ed said, still laughing and gasping for air, “Don’ think whoe’er wrote tha’ ever tried it . Why’d ya pick tha’ one anyway?”
“Saturday night. Wanted somethin’ special.”
“Well, tha’ was special alright,” Ed groaned again, “Shit. Couldn’ we a jus’ picked up a pizza ‘n rented a movie or gone ta a movie in town? That’d be special enough fer me.”
“Watcha wanna see?”
“I dunno,” Ed teased, “maybe somethin’ with tha’ Jake fella in it.”
“Gotta crush, ol’ man? Know one movie he’s in fer sure.”
“Okay. Ya got me. Anythin’ but tha’ one.”
“Y’ ever gonna see it?”
“Nope.” Ed quickly changed the subject, “Hey, almos’ forgot, when do I get ta read yer story?”
“Our story. Left it on the kitchen table with yer readin’ glasses ‘n a piece a apple pie. Know ya cain’t sleep sometimes… figured if ya got up ya could read it then. Otherwise it’ll still be there in the mornin’.”
“Thanks, bud. Sweet a ya.” Ed wrapped his arm around Hank and pulled him close, “Hey, Hank?”
“Yeah?”
“Ya ain’t gonna write ‘bout tonigh’, are ya?”
“Probably.”
“Shit.”
“Night Cowboy, Love ya.”
Ed sighed resignedly, then whispered, “Night Rodeo, Love you too.”
------------------------------
A couple of minutes later:
------------------------------
“Hey Ed, ya ‘sleep yet?
“Nah, think I migh’ be dead tho’. If yer gonna keep readin’ them stories we might ha’ to get one a them defibrillator things ta keep nex’ ta the bed.”
“Can I ask ya somethin’ then?”
“’Course ya can.” Ed said, feeling a bit apprehensive at how serious Hank sounded.
“When we, uh… you know… do y’ever preten’ I look like Jack? Do y’ever wish I was good lookin’ with blue eyes like tha”?
…………Silence…………..
“Ed, didya hear me?”
“Yeah, I heard ya. I’m just tryin’ to think back over the las’ forty odd years as ta whether ya ever asked me a dumber question.”
“Know it sounds dumb, short story never made me feel this way, those guys didn’ sound all tha’ attractive, knew she changed their looks ta protect us, but them guys in the movie… damn… ‘n now all them stories makin’ such a big deal ‘bout how beautiful Jack is, havin’ them piercin’ blue eyes ‘n all. I know I’m not…I thought maybe…”
“Nobody really looks like tha’ Rodeo, not in real life. In the movies they do it all wi’ lightin’ ‘n mirrors. Dim lightin’ ‘n lots a mirrors… ‘n smoke, sometimes they use smoke.”
“C’mon, be serious.”
Ed sighed and turned towards Hank, “O.K., I’ll be honest with ya, but ya migh’ not like it.”
“Shit,” Hank thought, “What kinda can a worms did I open? Shoulda jus’ kep ma mouth shut.”
“When I first laid eyes on ya I thought to m’self, ‘y’know tha’ boy’d be perfec’ ifn’ only he had blue eyes’. Been eatin’ away at me for years. Nearly had a fit when they cast a blue-eyed boy as Jack. Almos’ left ya ta chase after ‘im. Thought ‘bout askin’ ya ta get some a them colored contac’ lenses. Maybe we can go inta town Monday…..”
“Asshole”, Hank laughed and threw himself on top of Ed, pinning Ed’s arms beside his head.
“Ya ain’t havin’ some kinda mid-life crisis on me now, are ya, bud? What with readin’ all them stories ‘n now startin’ to write ours? Wouldn’ it jus’ be easier ta buy a new truck? Or maybe I could jus’ getcha a puppy? Tha’ seems ta work wonders in some a them stories.”
Hank grinned at the puppy reference, but he could sense the concern behind Ed’s teasing words, “Nah, don’ think ‘m havin’ a mid-life crisis. The movie ‘n all them stories jus’ make me think ‘bout stuff is all. Think ‘bout us. So many ways it coulda played out. Makes me feel like we mighta dodged a lot a bullets.”
“Think I know whatcha mean, Hank. Weren’t no bed a roses fer us. But it played out this way. And it ended up good. Real good.” Ed thought for a bit, then went on, “People writn’ them stories dealin’ with a real sad story ‘n a real mean world, ‘n sometimes they jus’ can’t let Jack ‘n Ennis escape themselves or tha’ world. Truth is, world’s still like tha’ in a lot a ways ‘n in a lot a places.”
“Ya turnin’ into a philosopher now Ed?”
“Nah. All them stories jus’ makin’ me think too.”
Thanks Ed. Know ya still have a hard time talkin’ ‘bout this stuff. I do too sometimes - embarrassed ta let ya read wha’ I wrote.”
Don’ ha’ no cause to be embarrassed ‘bout anythin’ ya write, Hank." Ed paused, then grinned, “’Cept maybe if ya write ‘bout wha’ we was doin earlier… now that would be embarrassin’.”
Hank kissed Ed’s neck and laughed, “Yeah, tha’s the other thing them stories are about.”
“Hey, Rodeo”
“Yeah, Cowboy?”
“Ya know I think yer ‘bout the best lookin’ man I e’er laid eyes on, dontcha?.”
Hank smiled and leaned down, brushing his lips against Ed’s, “Backatcha, Cowboy.” Hank’s lips pressed down more urgently, his tongue… “Wait a minute…’Bout the best lookin’?”
Ed grinned, “Well, there’s that Tyler fella from tha’ one story…’n I always kinda had a thing for Clint Eastwood… ‘n then there’s that fella from Lonesome Dove….”
“Jeez, Cowboy, thought ya weren’t queer. Sure admire a lot a men fer a guy who aint queer.”
“I aint queer.” Ed said with a frown, “Am a little worried tho’.”
“’Bout what?”
Ed suddenly pulled his arms free and grabbed Hank, rolling him onto his back and kissing him briefly but deeply, until Hank moaned. Then looking first to the left and then to the right, Ed whispered conspiratorially in Hank’s ear, “Think I migh’ be gay.”
---