[NON-CANON SMASH] A dirty old dog like me in a nice, clean house like this

[musthatefrogs]

[Volgin had yet to forget Raikov's birthday. It was one of the few things he could clearly recall, out of all the essential things he remembered from the last part of his life, and having the ability to slither onto Raikov's workplace's grounds helped somewhat with his plans. Unfortunately, a seven foot behemoth was still something of a sore sight

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[majorcrotchgrab]

[And it seemed Raikov had kept the same schedule as when Volgin was last here. He was making his way back to the dorm, a bit melancholy that no one remembered it was his birthday. He'd been here for over a year and no one gave a shit about him? No lavish dinner, no partying for a few days... No, tonight he'd just eat and drink himself until he passed out. What a way to spend a holiday.]

I'm honestly not that bad of a person, am I, Katya...?

[The Joltik vibrated and chirped in his pocket. That brought a small smile to his face]

At least I'm not completely alone...

[Still. His parents and Volgin had always spoiled him rotten during his birthday. Oh, how he missed that. He missed Volgin. Why did he bother coming back to the school, he wondered?]

... I need a fucking drink.

[musthatefrogs]

[And what a surprise for the Russian when his day was capped off with a sudden attack, his assailant a blur thundering from the bushes and lashing out. The towering hulk that whisked him off into the brush so easily had him pinned against one of the larger trees. He leaned in.

There was a scarf tightly wrapped around the lower part of his face. A large brimmed hat was pulled low. Raikov could only see himself in the large sunglasses. He was being examined so carefully, with a low muffled chuckle.

Not to mention he spoke in Russian:]

/You leave yourself so vulnerable these days, my friend./

[majorcrotchgrab]

Ah!

[Oh god, why him? Why on his birthday? Could things get any worse?

But before Raikov could say anything, Katya sprung out of his coat pocket and latched herself to the man's nose, chirping angrily as she released a Thunder Wave.]

[musthatefrogs]

[Gnghhh! Volgin had not been expecting that! This sudden furry bug monster attacking his face was trying to electrocute him.

Surely enough, by the merit of surprise alone, Volgin found himself completely thwarted on the ground, trying to tear the annoying monster off his face when he could recover use of his arms. With no real immunity to electricity suddenly dumped on him, Volgin could only see white as his whole body was locked and twitching, unresponsive to his commands. He did manage to mutter a few incomprehensible things, but those were exactly that.]

[majorcrotchgrab]

[Wow. Katya had that kind of power...? He shook his head and moved away from the tree, quickly pulling his gun out and pointing it at the large figure.

Katya gave his nose a tiny chomp and attempted to skitter back over to his trainer. She was quite proud of herself.]

Who the hell are you?!