Comments | murderofonerose: Now proofread and hopefully without wacky verb tense hijinx.

murderofonerose

Now proofread and hopefully without wacky verb tense hijinx.

Apr 27, 2011 19:17

(...Hijinx is a word whose spelling I either do not know or believe in.)

Title: Dare
Author: murderofonerose
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Toki, Skwisgaar
Summary: Like a child daring himself to run up and touch something beautiful but fragile, to prove that he's not afraid of breaking anything but also because it's beautiful.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 549
Disclaimer: ( Read more... )

skwisgaar/toki, fanfiction, metalocalypse, slash, writing

Comments 2

proofread neonlotus1 April 28 2011, 13:37:15 UTC

I didn't notice any verb hijinx, but I totally love your summary:-)

Liked the episode, too:D

sd_kon May 1 2011, 05:25:42 UTC

Bit late, even though I read this ages ago and meant to comment.

Lovely writing, lovely story. Not sure about the summary, seems a bit long-winded to me. But I adored the story! So... haunting. The descriptions through Toki's eyes were very well done, and very vivid - probably the best part of the story. I thought the writing got better as the story went on - not sure if it's because the opening paragraph seemed a bit 'tripping', or if because you got warmed up, or because of my reading... but it was really very good. Thumbs up from me!

Oops. Long comment. My bad! XP