We Bring The Fire - 2

[muggy_mountain]

Fandom: Final Fantasy X
Title: We Bring The Fire (part 2/4)
Characters: Auron, Braska, Chappu, Jecht, Wen Kinoc
Ratings: PG-13
Warnings: You probably won't like this if you don't like angst and violence. Anything more would be spoiler-y.
Notes: This was written for Laylah as part of the Doink! Final Fantasy Exchange. Only about a billionty months

Comments

[auronlu]

It's all beautifully written; you bring characters to life very believably, and the glimpse of Paz is excellent. It's always interesting to see how we imagine this woman we never met, save in that one too-bland simulacra image; it seems most of us agree in imagining someone with Rikku's sense and less sugar, a no-nonsense down-to-earth bright spirit. I love her tweaking Auron instead of being overly put out by him.

Most of all, I love the fact that you made Auron a JERK. An utter jerk to her and Braska for the first half of the chapter. Totally brainwashed by Yevon. And yet he's burned, and the "sorry" at the end is ten times more powerful because he did wrong a friend, and knows it.

I also like the altar for the summoner who brought Yevon to the Ronso. Ronso pups, and Ronso in general, don't get enough screentime in our fandom.

[muggy_mountain]

It's interesting, Auron's interaction with them. In my head, it was more complicated. I knew I wasn't going to convey that with what I wrote, though, so I don't obviously it's no fault of the reader.

Auron's being a jerk, but not really because he's brainwashed. There's some of that, yes. At this point, he still has faith in Yevon as an institution. Still, he is not pleased to be delivering the eviction notice. Auron was specifically chosen for the task because of his history with Braska -- an extra little jab of cruelty at the heathen priest. But at the same time Auron's a bit jealous -- this is a pairing fic, after all. Still, he doesn't have any specific ill will against Paz, ultimately, Auron would rather them be happy than not.

He's a big tangled mess of resentment, guilt, jealousy and discomfort. But from the outside, he just looks like an ass.

[muggy_mountain]

If you can make sense out of that clusterbomb of typos and grammarfails that was my last comment, I congratulate you.

[muggy_mountain]

Also, in a way I like your reading just as much or more. It's what Braska and Paz would both be thinking.

[auronlu]

Aww. I like yours better.

I didn't pick up the nuance that Auron's discomfort in that interaction was due to frustration at having to let down a friend, rather than his not being able to cope with the reality of Braska's heathen wife. The loves-Braska angle makes it better.

[muggy_mountain]

I thought about rewriting it to make that bit more obvious, but I was SO TIRED of this story by then. >>