Welcome...to the Porniverse!
Once more at work, I found myself transferring somebody's porn reels. It truly is amusing to me. Some people wish they could watch porn at work, whereas watching porn at work is apparently part of my job description.
The main reason I'm writing this is that one of the reels reminded me of the fact that "mainstream" porn exists in a completely alternate universe from ours--a "Porniverse", if you will. In the case of the reel I'm referring to, observe the following evidence of the existence of the Porniverse:
Two very attractive, big-breasted women drive to a secluded spot in the woods. Once there they proceed to strip naked and have sex with each other. Lo and behold, a random dork in a neckerchief is wandering by and happens to spot them. He watches them for a bit, and then proceeds to approach them with his poindexter out.
Now, living in our universe you might expect the two lesbians to react in anger and disgust by kicking him in the cajones as hard as they can, grabbing their things, and storming away as he rolls around on the ground clutching his battered genitals.
It is not so in the Porniverse, however. There the two women greet this man--and complete stranger--with warm and excited smiles. They turn their total attention away from each other and onto him. They help him out of his clothes, perform oral sex upon him, and then one of them climbs on top of him and rides him home. She even allows him to, uh, "culminate" their liasion internally. This suggests that, in the Porniverse, even lesbians are on The Pill.
I cannot help but wonder how many men in our universe have acted under the delusion that this is how things actually work, only to later reflect in their jail cell--while no doubt being "culminated" by a guy named Bruno--that, in fact, it does not. If only these unfortunate souls had been born in the Porniverse, tragedy could have been averted.
The main reason I'm writing this is that one of the reels reminded me of the fact that "mainstream" porn exists in a completely alternate universe from ours--a "Porniverse", if you will. In the case of the reel I'm referring to, observe the following evidence of the existence of the Porniverse:
Two very attractive, big-breasted women drive to a secluded spot in the woods. Once there they proceed to strip naked and have sex with each other. Lo and behold, a random dork in a neckerchief is wandering by and happens to spot them. He watches them for a bit, and then proceeds to approach them with his poindexter out.
Now, living in our universe you might expect the two lesbians to react in anger and disgust by kicking him in the cajones as hard as they can, grabbing their things, and storming away as he rolls around on the ground clutching his battered genitals.
It is not so in the Porniverse, however. There the two women greet this man--and complete stranger--with warm and excited smiles. They turn their total attention away from each other and onto him. They help him out of his clothes, perform oral sex upon him, and then one of them climbs on top of him and rides him home. She even allows him to, uh, "culminate" their liasion internally. This suggests that, in the Porniverse, even lesbians are on The Pill.
I cannot help but wonder how many men in our universe have acted under the delusion that this is how things actually work, only to later reflect in their jail cell--while no doubt being "culminated" by a guy named Bruno--that, in fact, it does not. If only these unfortunate souls had been born in the Porniverse, tragedy could have been averted.