i just put a finger on something about my current decision-making processes that's worth recording, because it seems a key component to the question of *why* i decide things the way i do
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I'm not sure how you can resolve that either. I'm not the same way at all. I'm a very patient person, who likes to see results, but am willing to wait for them. I'm more likely to invest in long-term benefits than short-term ones because I see the results as they develop and know that they're making a difference...
... but I have no idea how one could instill that in oneself.
Belief, Faith, Trustmatthew_gNovember 11 2005, 16:11:07 UTC
I have a great trust for Gravity. It has *never* behaved unpredictably. Every time I've let my feet out from under me, it has obligingly slammed my ass onto the ground. My observational data is completely consistent across millions of data points. I have faith in gravity. To put it in the parlance of The Damned Book, I have very strong expectations for the behaviour of gravity
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This, in some ways, just screams 'lack of successful role models'. Also, from your earlier post, you mentioned that "many of your friends" regret losing their freedom, and envy it in you. I think that one thing you could do would be to look at some of your friends that are in successful long term committed relationships, and look at what they have through a different filter.
Yah, Mym and I envy you your freedom, and your ability to do whatever you want whenever you want, checkbook willing, and we've said as much, but we're both incredibly content with the decisions we've made, both in regards to each other and with having children. Cost / reward analysis. This is what we want, and, relationship work and friction aside, we're both pretty thrilled to be doing what we're doing for the rest of our lives. Really. We are more happy and satisfied because of those choices
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i appear to lack a degree of faith that the long-term plan is the "right thing to do"..
hrm... faith... lack of faith is becoming quite the point in the lives of those around me lately.... Choices are one thing. Faith in the outcome of that choice being the RIGHT thing...well that's something different entirely.
Faith... involves a willingness to cede your power over the outcome elsewhere. To believe, sometimes in darkness, that the current situation will end where it is it supposed to. Faith accepts what is today, and moves us forward.
Hrm... May I have today the Serentity to Accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to Change the things I can... and the WISDOM to know the difference.
Darling.. you are one of the wisest people I know. By virtue of your hard work and willingness to look your weasels in the face and let them know when they don't belong. You will navigate this. In that, I have faith.
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... but I have no idea how one could instill that in oneself.
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What he said.
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Yah, Mym and I envy you your freedom, and your ability to do whatever you want whenever you want, checkbook willing, and we've said as much, but we're both incredibly content with the decisions we've made, both in regards to each other and with having children. Cost / reward analysis. This is what we want, and, relationship work and friction aside, we're both pretty thrilled to be doing what we're doing for the rest of our lives. Really. We are more happy and satisfied because of those choices ( ... )
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hrm... faith... lack of faith is becoming quite the point in the lives of those around me lately.... Choices are one thing. Faith in the outcome of that choice being the RIGHT thing...well that's something different entirely.
Faith... involves a willingness to cede your power over the outcome elsewhere. To believe, sometimes in darkness, that the current situation will end where it is it supposed to. Faith accepts what is today, and moves us forward.
Hrm... May I have today the Serentity to Accept the things I cannot change, the Courage to Change the things I can... and the WISDOM to know the difference.
Darling.. you are one of the wisest people I know. By virtue of your hard work and willingness to look your weasels in the face and let them know when they don't belong. You will navigate this. In that, I have faith.
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