I think I finally figured something out

[mseuphrates]

I've been pondering some fairly deep topics lately, deep topics regarding the past, the future, who I am, where I'm going, where WE are going... I've been keeping most of these thoughts fairly close to the vest, wanting to wait until I feel I can express what's rattling around in my brainpan clearly enough for other peole to understand before I

Comments

[fatefox]

zombie brain hamsters must DIE!

I'm one of the online-friends you haven't met yet (and I struggle with many of the same issues - sure people like me online, but they haven't met the "real me") but I consider you to be a true friend. :)

I do hope that someday we manage to make the face-to-face meeting if my schedule ever slows down when you are in NEOhio again.

Great big hugs for you. And remember you have to be kind and gentle with yourself too - you're the only You you've got. :) Sometimes that's the hardest lesson.

[anlei]

Friendships can be fickle things. Too often we let our friendships go on the back burner to other things like family, work or school. I'm particularly bad at this, if it's not right in front of me it's hard for me to remember to do something about it unless that person is one of my best friends.

I've lost friends to things like location and time. It sucks and there's nothing you can really do about it unless that other person decides to be more active in keeping the friendship. I think it's probably one of the hardest lessons to learn; certain friends are only meant to walk the path with you for a short time.

Keep your chin up! Meaningful friendships are out there and they just take time to grow. Try not to let the people who don't value your friendship dictate how you value yourself. From what I've seen, you seem like a compassionate and a very friendly person, people will recognize and respect that.

[daphne24]

As the person who seems to have inspired this post, I feel I have to respond.

I actually understand to a degree - I didn't grow up with many friends either and it took a long time for me to accept that people actually wanted to be around *me*. I still struggle with that almost daily.

At some point though, I also figured out that some people are just going to come and go. Not everyone is meant to stick around forever. As I've been told repeatedly, some people are around for a reason, or a season. The reason may not be immediately clear. The season may be very brief. But there are a myriad of reasons that people come and go.

[radanols_girl]

Well, I've met you in person, in fact YOU were the whole reason I joined LJ! I don't know that I ever told you that. So I *know* you are made of awesome.

I get what you are saying here. Gods it stirs up old memories and emotions. The difference being I don't think I ever learned to be a friend. At least not a good one. It takes a lot of pushing me to get me to leave my cave. Certain people who are/were my friends know how to do it, but it doesn't happen that often anymore. There is still this little girl inside of me always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I dislike that I am pessimistic and so afraid of putting myself out there. However, I've been gobsmacked enough times by that other shoe to be wary.

[maevemacaraab]

“The first thing divided up in a divorce/break-up is the friends