Many moons back, I wrote a magazine column that suggested that the only way to make the film Jurassic Park watchable was to dub over the tyrannosaur's roars with Dennis Hopper's dialogue from Blue Velvet, and I was told later that someone had apparently done just that. I'd love to get a copy, just to watch the tyrannosaur standing over the remains of the Visitor's Center, roaring "I'LL FUCK ANYTHING THAT MOVES, HA HA HA!" (One of the reasons why I'm still so desperately in love with the Czarina is because she can occasionally be more twisted than I am. The day we married, we came back home after the ceremony and turned on the television for background noise while we were packing for a honeymoon trip, and Fox was running The Lost World. I still get weak in the knees after the Czarina walked into the living room, noted the scene with the mama tyrannosaur drinking out of the swimming pool, and yelled "Heinecken? Fuck that shit! PABST BLUE RIBBON!")
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