D/D Celebration week fic: A Leisurely Repentance - part 2

[morgan72uk]

Title: A Leisurely Repentance
Author: Morgan2uk

Disclaimer and Author's Note - see part 1

A Leisurely Repentance - Epilogue

Comments

[rogoblue]

How on Earth do you craft a sweet ending to that story?

I like that the marriage traps them both yet keeps them together. I didn't think of that when you showed me the partial story and I could imagine only tragedy worthy of the name as an outcome.

I like Dominic as the more emotional one of the pair--I always have. There's dispassionate competence and unbridled passion in him.

Your Adelle is, as always, beautifully wrought. So in control of many aspects of her life and out of control when it comes to Dominic.

I really like this. And it's LONG!

[morgan72uk]

Thanks - I'm not sure I think the end is sweet - but I am glad it works. I really wanted to end it with their having this huge thing happening and not exactly being happy with it or each other. She is still going to try to send him and the kid away after all.

[rogoblue]

C'mon, after all they've been through, discretely holding hands is sweet. It is.

She'll try to send him away. He'll say no. They'll fight and then they'll have exquisite make up sex. And repeat.

[morgan72uk]

Well, yes - they will. And after all of that, managing something as simple as holding hands is a bit deal.
Although I do have this image of him in a house in the mountains with a small boy or girl of about 5 - who doesn't remember Mummy at all. One day there is a big flash of something in the sky and a few days after that a jeep pulls up outside the house and a woman gets out...

[darling_ashes]

This was great! I love how crack can never truely be crack in Dollhouse.

I love that due to corporate policy, they had to get married but it turned into something so much deeper (the feelings mixed with massive betrayal yet they can never truely hate the other or stay away from the other) and the relatively happy ending (hurray for secret hand holding and a Dewitt-Dominic baby).

[morgan72uk]

Thank you - glad you enjoyed it. I knew I'd likely never get a better change to throw in a pregnancy, so I thought I'd go for it and get it out of my system. This way she still gets to be really pissed at him.
It should be crack - I still don't know how it isn't except once you get somewhere they can programme people to order, then a corporate policy which says you have to get married - and which is really about analysing your choices and exercising control doesn't seem so out there. Thanks again.

[cold_queen_5]

Oh, that's just gorgeous. Absolutely wonderful. You've captured their inner fight, with themselves and each other, so well. I love this alternative take on what could have been.

And you're right, this could've been so much crackier, but you MADE IT PLAUSIBLE. I APPLAUD YOU.

[morgan72uk]

I think the Rossum own you body and soul helped out with the plausibility stakes - and it being a way for Rossum Corporate to analyse them based on their choices. It didn't occur to me right away that this also meant he might get away with telling her - because she wouldn't be able to send him the the attic without admitting what she had done and likely suffering a similar fate.

I'm glad you enjoyed the the inner fight - which is far from over in my mind at least. Thanks for the lovely feedback.

[derevko_child]

Aww, this is lovely. I was giggling all throughout the first part and went all, "NO, NO WHAT" at the end, but this coda for them is lovely (to tell the truth, I have a D/D plotbunny - outlined, but yet to be written - that ends almost the same way as the first part... with no coda. I've been having difficulty with it though, so it's been put at the backburner... maybe forever)

You captured them very well and the ending took my breath away. Because even though the relationship's "saneness" is a big question mark, they know they have to depend on each other to survive.

You know, I always like your way of telling stories. I don't like writing paragraphs of stuff because I'm afraid people would get bored with it (but I do it anyway), but with yours, I love it, never bored with it. Share your skills, my friend.

[morgan72uk]

Aww thanks - that's lovely feedback. I'm glad you enjoyed the descent from a fun beginning to a big mess at the end - and a coda that hopefully isn't too sweet (she totally hasn't given up on persuading him to take the baby and get out of Dodge).

I don't know about the writing paragraphs - I am not very good at describing things or places, its a lot of internal landscape with me - but I always worry that I over write and people will get bored. I know I need to work on external plot and descriptiveness in any non fan fic I write.

I have a couple of unfinished pieces as well - not sure I'll ever get round to completing them - but that's OK.

[oltha_heri]

Is it okay if I fall at your feet with praises of love and admiration 'cause damn I so have them for you right now. First you take one of the crackiet, silliest, cliche filled premises in all fanfiction-dom and make it into a true and touching story for one of the least applicable pairings there is. Then you did it so totally beautiful and in character, I loved it.

[morgan72uk]

Thank you - that's a lovely comment! I was terribly worried about the premise - which is why it started as crackfic - but then it sort of made sense that Rossum could require it and once I'd gone there it didn't seem too much of a leap that I could make it a vehicle for him telling her the truth, knowing that she probably wouldn't send him to the attic without risking herself - but also knowing that it would destroy everything else. I threw the pregnancy in as well, since I thought I would probably never have a better chance to get a way with that. I am glad you enjoyed it. Phew!