Human Error, Chapter 5
Title: Human Error, Ch. 5
Fandom : Moonlight
Characters : Mick, Beth, Josef, Simone
Rating : R
Spoilers: Post "Sonata"
Summary : 8th entry into my post "Sonata" series. Beth has found what she hopes will be a good use for her leftover Black Crystal, and Mick struggles with whether to use Coraline's gift.
When I finally picked my jaw up off the floor, I could only get out: “You want what?”
“The cure, Mick. I want to be human.”
“Uh-huh,” I said in disbelief. “Right, Josef. You really are out of your mind.”
“I’m not kidding, Mick. I can’t go on without Simone, but I’m not gonna turn her. I can’t make myself be human, do human things. As a vampire, it’s all so distasteful to me now. The weakness, the mortality. I figure, you make me human, I won’t have any choice in the matter. I will be human. I can try it out with this cure of yours, see what I’ve been not missing all these years.”
I looked at him, still in disbelief. “You think that if you are human, Simone will stay with you? You believe that that is what she really wants from you? It seems to me, Josef, that she loves you as a vampire. She just wants a compromise.”
“That’s what I’m tryin’ to tell you, Mick. I can’t act human. I’ve tried. It was a disaster. Oh, I can pretend in the business world, in public. But in private? My baser vamp instincts won’t seem to let me.”
“The cure isn’t a game, Josef. You won’t just be acting human. You will have all the frailties, the base desires that disgust you so much now. And you won’t be able to just stop being human, not by yourself or as soon as you want it. You won’t have the heightened senses-and believe me, I think if there was one thing I missed during my brief return to humanity, it was that. It was almost as if I’d suddenly gone blind.”
I thought my words might change his mind, or at least make him think a little more. But one thing I’d learned about Josef these last fifty years, he was tenacity personified.
“Please, Mick. Let me at least try it. I mean, you don’t seem to have made a decision yet, and you’re letting all that fine compound just sit there, going to waste.”
I looked at him closely. There were many concerns warring for dominance in my head. For one, I still found it hard to believe Josef, the ultimate happy-as-I-am vampire, wanted to try humanity on for size again. For another, I hadn’t decided for myself whether I wanted to use the cure, and it struck me as the height of irony that Josef Kostan was going to beat me to it. There was also, a tiny, selfish part of my brain that felt reluctant to sacrifice some of the compound just so Josef could experiment. But seeing his resolve, I nodded at him once, and went to the safe hidden behind my book shelves.
I’d put it in an airtight box so that no other vampire could smell it and steal it from me, namely, Coraline’s remaining brothers. Josef watched every move I made, almost eager to try it now that I’d obviously agreed to help him. I also hid my weapons there, and had to move some aside to access the safe where I kept the box. I punched in the code and removed its precious contents almost reverently.
“Grab a knife from the kitchen,” I directed Josef. He got it and joined me on the couch-the same couch where Coraline had first given me the cure. I looked deeply into his eyes.
“You sure you want to do this?”
“Yeah, Mick, I’m sure. Now what do I do with this knife?”
“Cut your arm. That’s where I’ll put the compound.” I watched him remove his suit coat and roll up his sleeve. I took the knife and made a shallow cut on his right forearm. I scooped out about the same amount Coraline had used.
“Wait-“ Josef interrupted. “You think if we used less, it won’t last too long?”
“I don’t know. This is how much Coralline gave me. You turned me after a few days, so I have no idea how long it might have lasted. She said months-but your guess is as good as mine. We can try using less compound and see what happens.”
“Let’s try less. If I can’t stand being human again, I want it to be as short-lived as possible.”
“I could always change you back like you did me.”
“No. I’ll tough it out. Promise me you won’t change me back. God knows I don’t want to have to call you Daddy. I mean, I’m four-hundred years older than you.”
I chuckled softly, the shared laughter breaking the tension that had been building since he made his request. I put back half of what I’d taken out out with the knife. I held it over the cut, hovering it there, giving him an out.
“Last chance, Josef. You don’t have to do this. You don’t have to prove anything to Simone.”
“Maybe I have to prove something to myself. Do it already.” And so I did. He looked down at the wound, how it wasn’t healing quickly as vampire skin usually would. It was working, and watching Josef’s slow transformation was awe-inspiring to me. I was a little jealous, and tempted to try it again myself. I saw the play of emotions on Josef’s face. The warmth he must be feeling was spreading up to his cheeks, bringing new color to his vampire paleness. He clenched and unclenched his fists experimentally as the warmth spread into his hands.
“Oh… Mick…I can feel my heart beating.” He looked up at me, eyes wide. “I forgot this. Forgot the warmth, the…life.” He stood up, visibly agitated.
“You okay? Josef?” He wasn’t listening.
“I gotta go!” And before I knew it, he had left my apartment. I started to go after him, but realized if he was going to be human, he had to learn to be on his own in this. And besides, he knew where I lived if he needed help.
But I was selfishly a little more afraid for myself. He’d left me alone with the open container of the compound. It was like leaving an alcoholic alone with a bottle of Jack. Josef was human now, I marveled. That thought snapped me out of it, and I slid the little box closed. In the back of my mind, I had always thought that if I were human again, Josef would be my back up. He could defend Beth-or me-should the need arise. The idea of us both being human gave me a shaky feeling inside.
I thought about calling Beth, but I had no idea how I would explain the fact that I had given Josef the cure, and not myself. I put the box back in the safe, taking my time to put everything back in place. To keep my mind off things, I went to my office, hoping to get some work done before dawn.
***
The next afternoon, I was awakened again before my alarm. This time, it was a phone call which the caller ID identified as “Josef-Home.” I was immediately worried, wondering how my friend was coping with his new humanity.
“Josef?”
“No, sir,” said the familiar, very British voice of Josef’s butler. “It’s Niles, sir. We seem to be having a…situation here, Mr. St. John. If it’s not too much trouble, would you mind coming over here? It’s Master Josef. He’s having some…difficulty.”
I could hear the faint sounds of something banging, and then a lot of cussing and yelling from Josef.
“I’ll be right there.”
“Thank you , sir.” And the phone went dead.
Holy shit, Josef ! I thought. What the hell is going on there?
I was dressed and pulling up to Josef’s modern mansion in the hills within thirty minutes, not an easy fete in LA traffic. If it hadn’t been in the middle of the afternoon, I could have run there faster. Niles let me in, his face a mask of concern. He was a vampire himself, and I wondered how difficult it must be for him to suddenly be working for a human. It was quiet in the house now, but I could sense things were not quite right.
“Thank goodness, Mr. St. John. Master Josef is not quite himself. It appears he is suddenly-“ and he lowered his voice with well-trained discretion-“human, sir.”
“Yes, Niles, you aren’t mistaken. What’s been going on?”
“He got home last night, demanding his usual evening refreshment, though when I called in his regular freshie, he took one look at her and turned her away. I brought him bottled blood instead, which he attempted to drink.” And here his face blanched. “It’s very difficult to get blood out of white carpeting, sir.”
“What was that banging I heard on the phone?”
“Well, sir, he had attempted to sleep in the freezer, but locked himself in it, and lacked the strength to break out. All the racket was him pounding on the glass door of the freezer. I fear he was close to hyperthermia by the time I got him out.” I would have laughed but Niles seemed very frightened at these odd events.
“Excuse me, sir, but…do you know how this could have happened? I mean, I know it’s impossible, but I can hear his heart beating. I can smell his blood. He is no longer a vampire, sir. How can this be?”
“Don’t worry, Niles. His condition is only temporary. I’m glad you called me. You’re way too good for him.”
“Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.”
“Where is he now?”
“Please, follow me. We just received a delivery, and he is uh…seeing to it.” Niles led me to the seldom-used dining room, and left me, eager to get away from the spectacle that greeted us. I was shocked at the array of food covering the table. There was steak, lobster, caviar, an entire roast turkey, pasta, chocolate cake, crème Brule-and several other dishes and desserts I couldn’t quite identify. I remembered doing pretty much the same when I used the cure. But whereas I had gorged on Chinese food and hot dogs, he had apparently ordered everything he knew wealthy people ate.
At the head of the table, wrapped in a blanket I assumed was leftover from his battle with the freezer, sat Josef the human. In one hand he held a giant turkey leg, and in the other, the leg of a large crab.
“You look like Henry the Eighth,” I said dryly, sitting down at the other end of the table. He looked up at me in surprise, having lost the ability to sense a vamp’s presence. He tried hard to chew and swallow the large mouthful of turkey, looking around in vain for a napkin. I saw a cloth one beneath a plate and passed it to him.
“Thanks, Mick,” he said-or at least that’s what it sounded like. He finally swallowed the food and took a gulp from his nearby glass of red wine, wiping his mouth and hands soon after.
“And why would old Hank care about finding the right wife when he had so many other great things to eat?” He smirked at his dirty little joke. “Oh, my God, Mick. I forgot how great food tastes. I wish you could have some.”
“Yeah, me too. Niles says you’ve been having some problems.”
He shrugged and I was amused to see him blush for the first time. “Old habits. I don’t know quite what to do with myself. In some ways I feel so alive, but in others, so…dull and weak. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to this.”
I regarded him seriously, not liking the new softness of his features. It was Josef, but somehow…not.
“Regretting this?”
He took another drink. “I don’t know. Let’s see how Simone reacts first, shall we?”
“You haven’t called her yet?”
“No,” he replied, unable to help himself from digging his fork into a slice of chocolate cake. “I’m trying to adapt physically before I throw this in her lap.” God, I used to love my mother’s chocolate cake, I thought enviously.
“Hmmmm…I’ve never had chocolate before…” moaned Josef in ecstasy. He closed his eyes, savoring each bite. “You know, I actually heard a woman equate chocolate with sex once. I now see what all the fuss is about.”
“Yeah, good stuff. I remember.” I knew one thing for sure, this was not helping me make a logical decision where my own mortality was concerned. I had to turn the focus completely on Josef, and not compare my situation to his.
“So, my human friend, what do you plan to do today?”
He set down his fork, wiping the brown crumbs from his lips. “I’m gonna drive to Vegas with the top down in the middle of the day.”
“Wear sunscreen,” I injected.
“I guess you can’t come with me, though. That won’t be too fun.” He sat lost in thought a few moments.
“I’ll probably just go into the office. Business has been suffering lately.”
“Are you sure that’s such a good idea?” I asked.
“Why? What do you mean?”
“Your company is half-full of vampires, Josef, as is your board. You can’t go around other vamps that you know. They’ll get suspicious and start asking questions. Or, they might even kill you.” I let those thoughts sink in.
“Holy shit! What the fuck did I do?” He slammed his fist down on the table, wincing in pain and shaking his hand out gingerly in frustration.
“You haven’t been thinking with your head too much lately,” I reminded him pointedly. “I think it’s time you finally went on that vacation you’ve been planning to take the last twenty years.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” His eyes brightened suddenly. “How ‘bout a cruise? You and Beth could come with me. You could stay in during the day…I’d take Simone. This could be our chance to test out the new me.” I thought briefly of the pile of unfinished casework of my own business. The last several months I’d really let my job suffer, having focused most of my attention on Beth. On the other hand, I really didn’t like the slightly manic way Josef was acting. I really thought he might need my protection until he rediscovered the ins and outs of being human.
“I’ll ask Beth if she can take off work. She’s been there about a year; I think she’s entitled to vacation days now.”
He clapped his hands together in glee. “I’ll call Simone. Don’t tell Beth about me yet. I want to surprise everyone.”
Well, that was typical Josef behavior. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.
“I’ll make all the arrangements. It’s on me.” He walked over to me and held out his hand. I stood up and shook it, but next thing I knew, I was wrapped in his warm embrace. I felt him squeeze me as hard as he could. I barely even felt the power behind it. When he pulled back, there were tears in his eyes. Tears? I thought I was the sentimental one.
“Thanks, Mick. This might just be the thing that will make Simone come back to me for good.” He wiped at his eyes, surprised at the completely uncharacteristic emotional display. He sniffled . “I suddenly realized something. I love you, man.” Then we were back to hugging. I rolled my eyes heavenward.
“Yeah, Josef. Me too. And you’re welcome. I think.” We said our goodbyes and I walked out of the dining room. My last image of Josef was of him dabbing his eyes and nose with the napkin. Did I say this wasn’t going to be so bad? Well, I retract that statement.