[Fic] So That I Might Be Where You Are (SGA, John/Rodney)
I have been working on this for weeeeekkkkssss and I still ended up being late! (It's because I don't know the meaning of early and most likely never will). Anyways, HAPPY (belated) BIRTHDAY, ribbon_purple !!! ♥♥♥
Notes: This had wanted to be porn except then some narration and introspection got in the way but hopefully it’s enjoyable? (And, also, I can’t write porn to save my life so, um, maybe this is a good thing?) This is where John is a vampire and Rodney isn’t. ribbon_purple is also writing a McShep parody of Twilight in which John plays Edward, and Rodney’s Bella, so think of this as a homage to her and her crackiness…except this is a lot less funny and more rambly and wangsty. (Wangsty? Like waff & angst combined, I suppose.) Link to The Pasty Loner and the Sparkly, Super Hot, Really Old Guy: Love at First Sniff Chapter One by her.
so that i might be where you are
The smell of Rodney hit John like a semi-truck pummeling into him at full-speed. He slowed his walk to the baggage claim, smiling softly at Rodney, who was standing near the conveyor belt, hands in pockets, foot tapping restlessly against the floor.
This was the problem with not seeing Rodney for so long - once he and Rodney did see each other, it took that much longer for John to control his instincts and not bite into Rodney’s neck and drain him of all his sweet, warm blood. As a result, he had to keep his distance before his senses became desensitized to Rodney again (something that required him keeping his distance from Rodney until he got acclimated again). He could ignore the other people milling around him just fine. He had years to get used to just an animal diet but with Rodney it was just somehow different…more difficult to ignore the sweet, pulsing song of the blood coursing through Rodney’s body - not impossible just more work than required of the average human whom he hadn’t formed an emotional attachment to.
It was a…hindrance, to say the least. His hunger for Rodney’s blood warred with his hunger to be with Rodney and not kill him - to feel Rodney inside him, feel every tremor and breath that Rodney took. All of his sensations were intensified tenfold now. It made the experiences he had with Rodney sweet and bittersweet - more so bittersweet because his body couldn’t respond in the normal way that Rodney expected him. Sure, he felt arousal but it never showed physically on his body due to the, well, not having any blood. Rodney pretended it didn’t bother him, but John suspected it screwed with his mind more than he let on.
This, combined with the fact that they only ever saw each other every six months or so, made John wonder how they could still be together. Maybe it was the fact that for half of the year, they didn’t see each other and therefore every time they did, it felt like the first time they caught each other’s eyes; made everything new and exciting again, made them hang onto the time they did have, not letting any arguments get between them, just the pure heat and passion they had for one another.
But the reactions he did have when he’d see Rodney again made him not want to leave Rodney, ever. If he didn’t love the flying so much and if Rodney didn’t love his job wherever he worked, maybe they wouldn’t have to try to steal moments together every six months. It was the only amount of time Rodney said he could take off work without fear of everything crumbling without him there.
Rodney hasn’t told him straight up where he worked or what he was up to the other half of the year when John didn’t see him, but he didn’t have to. John has been around humans long enough to distinguish between human and non-human smell and he often smelled Rodney with a mix of both. If nothing else, John could figure out that whatever Rodney did had to be classified as top secret for a reason.
~*~
John was sucking on Rodney’s hip, desire thrumming through his fingers into the hard clutch he had on Rodney’s naked hip. Rodney’s eyes were closed, his hands threading through John’s hair. His heartbeat thudded softly through the haze of John’s senses. He swiped his tongue one last time over Rodney’s jutting hipbone and started crawling up Rodney’s body, kissing Rodney all over. He tried to pick his favorite places to kiss Rodney once, tried to systematically rank his favorite parts of Rodney but halfway through realized that was a foolish thing to do. Simply, he loved all of the individual parts of Rodney, as well as the whole package.
Rodney’s hands framed around his neck, pulling John down closer to him, strong and like Rodney needed something to anchor him to the earth while John’s hands touched him everywhere, every place he was sensitive and the places he wasn’t and igniting this spark that Rodney swore was hard-wired to react to John’s caresses and make him lose himself.
The moment Rodney’s arms came around John, something made John lunge forward those mere inches of space between them and claim Rodney’s mouth hungrily. Rodney kissed him back fervently. He loved kissing Rodney - he was always so enthusiastic, pushing into John’s hard, lean chest and running his hands through John’s hair, touching him wherever he could that John swore his non-existent heart wanted to beat and implode in Rodney-bliss and die all over again, only this time there wouldn’t be any pain, any transformations into a blood-thirsty monster, but just him and Rodney, locked together in their mutual ecstasy physically and mentally.
“Please,” Rodney moans, out of breath as though he ran a marathon and not lied in bed for the whole day.
John gave him one last, brief kiss on the mouth before sliding down his body.
~*~
One of the perks of being a vampire was that John didn’t need a lot of sleep. Before he met Rodney, this proved to be a problem as most of the world tended to be asleep at night, leaving John to his own devices, which mostly involved him sitting in the dark brooding or drunk or both, which got a little dull after 180 years, quite frankly.
The San Francisco sun was finally rising, and he knew Rodney would be getting up soon. They might not have been together for that long, and it was even less time when one factored in their self-imposed breaks from one another, but John had found that Rodney tended to be a light sleeper. Even for a vampire who could move silently when he wished to, John hadn’t managed to sneak off without waking Rodney up. It was apparently an art form he had yet to learn, as ludicrous as it sounded.
His life after meeting Rodney consisted of taking naps in between watching Rodney sleep in his arms and trying to not have panic attacks every time he thought ‘yes, this is totally real and my life now,’ don’t freak out, don’t freak out, don’t freak out. (Yes, even vampires tended to be melodramatic once in a while.) He would wrap himself around Rodney and fall asleep in step with the other man, but he wouldn’t stay asleep for long. Sometimes, Rodney would throw off his sheet in the middle of the night and shiver and just the slightest change in Rodney’s body would snap John out of his sleep.
Rodney mumbled something beside him and turned, whacking John in the chest with his fist.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” John couldn’t resist smirking at the sight Rodney made. His hair was always sticky-uppity before he had a chance to comb it into submission, eyes bleary with sleep until the first cup of coffee hit his palate and helped to awaken him from his deep sleep.
“Shuddup,” Rodney said sleepy, putting his head onto John’s chest. John’s arms enveloped him. They got settled again in comfortable positions.
“When are you leaving?” John asked, not wanting to speak but needing to. They were lying in bed, wrapped up in each other, naked flesh next to naked flesh, and John hadn’t wanted to break the magic of their last day together before Rodney would go away again but his masochistic tendency wouldn’t let him enjoy the moment without knowing when it’d end, like it always did.
“Um, soon, have to be at the airport at eleven.”
“Oh.”
“But we have a whole,” Rodney raised his head up slightly to look over John’s shoulder at the digital clock on the nightstand, “five hours before I have to get up and get ready.”
“A whole five hours, hmmm? Whatever will we do?” John smirked at him, sitting up on his elbow, and tracing nonsensical patterns on Rodney’s bare chest.
“I’m sure we’ll think of something,” Rodney clasped a hand around John’s neck, bringing his head down closer to his. They stared at each other, mouths inches away. John breathed in Rodney, eyes taking in their fill of him hungrily. Rodney seemed to be doing the same thing and once again John considered uprooting his life completely for this man.
…It was just that when they were wrapped up like this in each other, John could at least think about all the things he desired with Rodney, if only to himself. Out there in the real world, it was that much easier to quell his desires and think it through more logically - think about how it was a bad idea to give up everything for Rodney when he didn’t even know how Rodney felt about him or how they were going to make everything work between them (it wasn’t like there was an instruction manual out there on how to date, and not especially how to date when one of the parties involved wasn’t technically alive anymore).
In the end, John didn’t say anything, just brought his lips closer to Rodney’s and kissed him hard.
This was his life. He had chosen it - more or less. He should've been happy. And he was - probably more than he deserved. Except he had wanted more.
He had always wanted more with Rodney.
~*~
This entry was originally posted at http://dahlia-moon.dreamwidth.org/80048.html.
Notes: This had wanted to be porn except then some narration and introspection got in the way but hopefully it’s enjoyable? (And, also, I can’t write porn to save my life so, um, maybe this is a good thing?) This is where John is a vampire and Rodney isn’t. ribbon_purple is also writing a McShep parody of Twilight in which John plays Edward, and Rodney’s Bella, so think of this as a homage to her and her crackiness…except this is a lot less funny and more rambly and wangsty. (Wangsty? Like waff & angst combined, I suppose.) Link to The Pasty Loner and the Sparkly, Super Hot, Really Old Guy: Love at First Sniff Chapter One by her.
so that i might be where you are
The smell of Rodney hit John like a semi-truck pummeling into him at full-speed. He slowed his walk to the baggage claim, smiling softly at Rodney, who was standing near the conveyor belt, hands in pockets, foot tapping restlessly against the floor.
This was the problem with not seeing Rodney for so long - once he and Rodney did see each other, it took that much longer for John to control his instincts and not bite into Rodney’s neck and drain him of all his sweet, warm blood. As a result, he had to keep his distance before his senses became desensitized to Rodney again (something that required him keeping his distance from Rodney until he got acclimated again). He could ignore the other people milling around him just fine. He had years to get used to just an animal diet but with Rodney it was just somehow different…more difficult to ignore the sweet, pulsing song of the blood coursing through Rodney’s body - not impossible just more work than required of the average human whom he hadn’t formed an emotional attachment to.
It was a…hindrance, to say the least. His hunger for Rodney’s blood warred with his hunger to be with Rodney and not kill him - to feel Rodney inside him, feel every tremor and breath that Rodney took. All of his sensations were intensified tenfold now. It made the experiences he had with Rodney sweet and bittersweet - more so bittersweet because his body couldn’t respond in the normal way that Rodney expected him. Sure, he felt arousal but it never showed physically on his body due to the, well, not having any blood. Rodney pretended it didn’t bother him, but John suspected it screwed with his mind more than he let on.
This, combined with the fact that they only ever saw each other every six months or so, made John wonder how they could still be together. Maybe it was the fact that for half of the year, they didn’t see each other and therefore every time they did, it felt like the first time they caught each other’s eyes; made everything new and exciting again, made them hang onto the time they did have, not letting any arguments get between them, just the pure heat and passion they had for one another.
But the reactions he did have when he’d see Rodney again made him not want to leave Rodney, ever. If he didn’t love the flying so much and if Rodney didn’t love his job wherever he worked, maybe they wouldn’t have to try to steal moments together every six months. It was the only amount of time Rodney said he could take off work without fear of everything crumbling without him there.
Rodney hasn’t told him straight up where he worked or what he was up to the other half of the year when John didn’t see him, but he didn’t have to. John has been around humans long enough to distinguish between human and non-human smell and he often smelled Rodney with a mix of both. If nothing else, John could figure out that whatever Rodney did had to be classified as top secret for a reason.
~*~
John was sucking on Rodney’s hip, desire thrumming through his fingers into the hard clutch he had on Rodney’s naked hip. Rodney’s eyes were closed, his hands threading through John’s hair. His heartbeat thudded softly through the haze of John’s senses. He swiped his tongue one last time over Rodney’s jutting hipbone and started crawling up Rodney’s body, kissing Rodney all over. He tried to pick his favorite places to kiss Rodney once, tried to systematically rank his favorite parts of Rodney but halfway through realized that was a foolish thing to do. Simply, he loved all of the individual parts of Rodney, as well as the whole package.
Rodney’s hands framed around his neck, pulling John down closer to him, strong and like Rodney needed something to anchor him to the earth while John’s hands touched him everywhere, every place he was sensitive and the places he wasn’t and igniting this spark that Rodney swore was hard-wired to react to John’s caresses and make him lose himself.
The moment Rodney’s arms came around John, something made John lunge forward those mere inches of space between them and claim Rodney’s mouth hungrily. Rodney kissed him back fervently. He loved kissing Rodney - he was always so enthusiastic, pushing into John’s hard, lean chest and running his hands through John’s hair, touching him wherever he could that John swore his non-existent heart wanted to beat and implode in Rodney-bliss and die all over again, only this time there wouldn’t be any pain, any transformations into a blood-thirsty monster, but just him and Rodney, locked together in their mutual ecstasy physically and mentally.
“Please,” Rodney moans, out of breath as though he ran a marathon and not lied in bed for the whole day.
John gave him one last, brief kiss on the mouth before sliding down his body.
~*~
One of the perks of being a vampire was that John didn’t need a lot of sleep. Before he met Rodney, this proved to be a problem as most of the world tended to be asleep at night, leaving John to his own devices, which mostly involved him sitting in the dark brooding or drunk or both, which got a little dull after 180 years, quite frankly.
The San Francisco sun was finally rising, and he knew Rodney would be getting up soon. They might not have been together for that long, and it was even less time when one factored in their self-imposed breaks from one another, but John had found that Rodney tended to be a light sleeper. Even for a vampire who could move silently when he wished to, John hadn’t managed to sneak off without waking Rodney up. It was apparently an art form he had yet to learn, as ludicrous as it sounded.
His life after meeting Rodney consisted of taking naps in between watching Rodney sleep in his arms and trying to not have panic attacks every time he thought ‘yes, this is totally real and my life now,’ don’t freak out, don’t freak out, don’t freak out. (Yes, even vampires tended to be melodramatic once in a while.) He would wrap himself around Rodney and fall asleep in step with the other man, but he wouldn’t stay asleep for long. Sometimes, Rodney would throw off his sheet in the middle of the night and shiver and just the slightest change in Rodney’s body would snap John out of his sleep.
Rodney mumbled something beside him and turned, whacking John in the chest with his fist.
“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” John couldn’t resist smirking at the sight Rodney made. His hair was always sticky-uppity before he had a chance to comb it into submission, eyes bleary with sleep until the first cup of coffee hit his palate and helped to awaken him from his deep sleep.
“Shuddup,” Rodney said sleepy, putting his head onto John’s chest. John’s arms enveloped him. They got settled again in comfortable positions.
“When are you leaving?” John asked, not wanting to speak but needing to. They were lying in bed, wrapped up in each other, naked flesh next to naked flesh, and John hadn’t wanted to break the magic of their last day together before Rodney would go away again but his masochistic tendency wouldn’t let him enjoy the moment without knowing when it’d end, like it always did.
“Um, soon, have to be at the airport at eleven.”
“Oh.”
“But we have a whole,” Rodney raised his head up slightly to look over John’s shoulder at the digital clock on the nightstand, “five hours before I have to get up and get ready.”
“A whole five hours, hmmm? Whatever will we do?” John smirked at him, sitting up on his elbow, and tracing nonsensical patterns on Rodney’s bare chest.
“I’m sure we’ll think of something,” Rodney clasped a hand around John’s neck, bringing his head down closer to his. They stared at each other, mouths inches away. John breathed in Rodney, eyes taking in their fill of him hungrily. Rodney seemed to be doing the same thing and once again John considered uprooting his life completely for this man.
…It was just that when they were wrapped up like this in each other, John could at least think about all the things he desired with Rodney, if only to himself. Out there in the real world, it was that much easier to quell his desires and think it through more logically - think about how it was a bad idea to give up everything for Rodney when he didn’t even know how Rodney felt about him or how they were going to make everything work between them (it wasn’t like there was an instruction manual out there on how to date, and not especially how to date when one of the parties involved wasn’t technically alive anymore).
In the end, John didn’t say anything, just brought his lips closer to Rodney’s and kissed him hard.
This was his life. He had chosen it - more or less. He should've been happy. And he was - probably more than he deserved. Except he had wanted more.
He had always wanted more with Rodney.
~*~
This entry was originally posted at http://dahlia-moon.dreamwidth.org/80048.html.