More Adventures in Twlight
Finished New Moon.
What.... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!
In a nutshell:
Edward: I'm pulling an Inu Yasha because I love you.
Bella: *depressed* I'll do suicidal things so I can hear Edward's voice in my head.
Jacob: :3 Hi! Let's ride bikes.
*insert some actual plot and development, as well as ten times more struggle with loving a supernatural being as with Edward. Poor Jacob. He needs a sitting down, a talking to, and a hug. :(*
Alice and Jacob: Grrrrrrrr....
Jacob: *asshole mode*
Alice: Edward did something melodramatic. ROAD TRIP!
Bella: Wow, this relationship with Jacob's kind of nice. Too bad vampires and werewolves hate the way each other smell.
Edward: If I step into the daylight, it will reveal I'm a vampire and not some guy slathered in body glitter.
Volturi Dudes: Blah blah blah threatening... blah blah intriguing. Blah blah.
Cullens: Okay, we're coo' Let's go home.
AND NOW THE EPILOGUE.
Reader: BZUH? After all this werewolf buildup we get a brief Italian field trip and then an epilogue? That's it?!
Jacob: *grouch grouch* I instinctively hate vampires.
Edward: Ugh. Werewolves. I hate them
Bella: *hearts for eyes* Oh, Edward, I'm totally not pissed off because you ditched me for my own good. I love you 4EVAH! When am I gonna be a vampire? I wanna be a vampire! I'm gonna pressure you. Nothing like pressuring a man into commitment.
Edward: Two can play that game. Let's get married.
Bella: WHAT THE HELL?!
Edward: Thanks, Jacob. You kept my lover alive when I was jackass.
Bella: Yeah, I guess I feel a little bad about being your girlfriend during that time... but I was really in love with Edward from the beginning because it's TRUE love. TRUE love doesn't need chemistry or bonding, you know. Your services are no longer needed. Oh, and you shouln't fight. I'd make me feel guilty. Oh, and I want to be a vampire. That'd fuck things up anyway, but this is the best for everyone, 'cause I'm so selfless. What? You still like hanging out with your topless young nubile males? Well, fuck you. I'm with Edward and I'm totally gonna be a vampire even though he doesn't want it. Nyah nyah.
Jacob: I still hate your guts and I'm now a double grouch.
Edward: Me too.
Bella: I love love! :D
Charlie: BELLA DAMMIT YOU ARE EXTRA GROUNDED!
Bella: UGH. Dad just doesn't understand how pure and true teen love is.
Plot: WAAAAAAAAIT! I totally slept through my alarm clock and- Ah, damn.
That's it?! That's it?! That wasn't a plot development!!
Hell, the potential plot wasn't even developed. I guess that's all gonna happen in the next book.
Ugh.... want... plot.... want... plot...
should I do it? Should I read Eclipse?
It's like a drinking game, but without waking up next to a stranger at the end.
What.... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!
In a nutshell:
Edward: I'm pulling an Inu Yasha because I love you.
Bella: *depressed* I'll do suicidal things so I can hear Edward's voice in my head.
Jacob: :3 Hi! Let's ride bikes.
*insert some actual plot and development, as well as ten times more struggle with loving a supernatural being as with Edward. Poor Jacob. He needs a sitting down, a talking to, and a hug. :(*
Alice and Jacob: Grrrrrrrr....
Jacob: *asshole mode*
Alice: Edward did something melodramatic. ROAD TRIP!
Bella: Wow, this relationship with Jacob's kind of nice. Too bad vampires and werewolves hate the way each other smell.
Edward: If I step into the daylight, it will reveal I'm a vampire and not some guy slathered in body glitter.
Volturi Dudes: Blah blah blah threatening... blah blah intriguing. Blah blah.
Cullens: Okay, we're coo' Let's go home.
AND NOW THE EPILOGUE.
Reader: BZUH? After all this werewolf buildup we get a brief Italian field trip and then an epilogue? That's it?!
Jacob: *grouch grouch* I instinctively hate vampires.
Edward: Ugh. Werewolves. I hate them
Bella: *hearts for eyes* Oh, Edward, I'm totally not pissed off because you ditched me for my own good. I love you 4EVAH! When am I gonna be a vampire? I wanna be a vampire! I'm gonna pressure you. Nothing like pressuring a man into commitment.
Edward: Two can play that game. Let's get married.
Bella: WHAT THE HELL?!
Edward: Thanks, Jacob. You kept my lover alive when I was jackass.
Bella: Yeah, I guess I feel a little bad about being your girlfriend during that time... but I was really in love with Edward from the beginning because it's TRUE love. TRUE love doesn't need chemistry or bonding, you know. Your services are no longer needed. Oh, and you shouln't fight. I'd make me feel guilty. Oh, and I want to be a vampire. That'd fuck things up anyway, but this is the best for everyone, 'cause I'm so selfless. What? You still like hanging out with your topless young nubile males? Well, fuck you. I'm with Edward and I'm totally gonna be a vampire even though he doesn't want it. Nyah nyah.
Jacob: I still hate your guts and I'm now a double grouch.
Edward: Me too.
Bella: I love love! :D
Charlie: BELLA DAMMIT YOU ARE EXTRA GROUNDED!
Bella: UGH. Dad just doesn't understand how pure and true teen love is.
Plot: WAAAAAAAAIT! I totally slept through my alarm clock and- Ah, damn.
That's it?! That's it?! That wasn't a plot development!!
Hell, the potential plot wasn't even developed. I guess that's all gonna happen in the next book.
Ugh.... want... plot.... want... plot...
should I do it? Should I read Eclipse?
It's like a drinking game, but without waking up next to a stranger at the end.