Let's not mince words [momland]

[mizarchivist]

I listened to the recent This American Life called "Birds and Bees" which discussed making babies, racism, and death. What adults say to kids, what kids say to each other. All these things are things I need to deal with at some point, and given the adventerous nature of my progeny, the death one is a theme for this week

Comments

You are still awesome

[drwex]

I appreciate that you use the language as I do. People look at me funny when I say that my mother died rather than some euphemism.

Pygment tells me she remembers having these "kid don't kill yourself" conversations with the kids. Particularly with Mr Pull-Burning-Liquids-Off-The-Counter-Let's-Eat-This-Random-Mushroom-We-Found-in-the-Backyard. All I remember is the sheer panic.

If there is one thing comforting I can say it is that Thing 2 (claims to) remember these incidents. I don't know how far that will go to keeping him alive when he's no longer within arm's reach, but it's a thought.

Re: You are still awesome

[mizarchivist]

Thanks for the reassurance.
I know it'll be OK. What I particularly remember is going to a funeral in my early 30s and having so many people just be unable to deal. I mean, sure: funeral for someone who shouldn't yet be dead. But also, our society is very insulated from death and we don't talk about it plainly. It's cutesied up or glammed into a video game or smeared onto the news. None of it is real.

I think it's a disservice to a kid to "protect" them from something so wholly that they are presented with a relatively normal situation and they lose their minds. I dunno. Thing? (I'm a little ranty this morning)

Re: You are still awesome

[drwex]

When I was in the summer after my senior year of HS the younger (sophomore in the same HS) sister of a classmate of mine was struck by a car and killed while on her bicycle. The whole thing was totally hushed up, private service, etc. I stopped by the house once to express my regrets and that was it. It felt so weird to me then, and now.

I am in sympathy with your rantiness. I feel like the whole "helicopter parent" thing has skewed the entire way we're supposed to treat kids - either we wrap them in bubble wrap for 18 years or we are neglectful. Where's the middle ground?

I seriously want to lend you "It's Complicated", danah boyd's book that I reviewed on LJ a bit ago. I think you'd really mind-vibe with it.

sure

[mizarchivist]

woo, danah!