(no subject)
Title: Le petite mort
Author: missyjack
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Word count:
Rating: NC-17
Genre: slightly shmoopy Wincest
Disclaimer: I don’t own these boys, I am just Kripke’s bitch
Sam will always leave him. There are planes where they connect, points of intersection between sweat, skin and soul, but he knows it won’t last.
Sometimes after they fight together, he’ll feel it. They’ll stand over burnt bones or dust or dissipating ether, having fought by each other, for each other. And for a moment their hands may touch, their eyes meet, and they are one. And Dean will hold his breath, as he holds the moment. Thinking “we’ve shared this, how could he not stay?’ And then he see’s something slip from Sam’s eyes, and he knows to Sam the occasion has become just the death of another monster.
Sometimes after they fuck, he’ll pretend to be asleep; an arm and maybe a leg, flung across his brother’s body. His world will contract until this is all he knows - that they fit and fill each other. Yet for Dean each moment is shot through with terrible anticipation. That soon Sam will disentangle himself and return to the other bed. For Dean this, not the moments after he comes, is his little death.
There are planes where they connect, points of intersection between sweat, skin and soul, but he knows it won’t last. Sam will always leave him.