Summer Memory~ Chapter 9/9
Title: Summer Memory
Pairings: Hints of Yunjae, Yoosu
Rating: G
Genre: Adventure, General
Length: 9 chapters
A/N: This was my first ever fanfic, written way back in Summer '08 when I first found out about TVXQ.
Summary: The guys take a hard-earned break in the Mediterranean one summer, as they recount all their close-calls that happened in their past. Each member has his own story to tell. . .with the help of an angel :3
~~~~~CHAPTER 9~~~~~
'What’s this? Where- where am I?' Jaejoong thinks as he swirls around in the recesses of his mind, the thoughts in his imagination.
He’s floating on a dark fog.
'So this is what the inside of a mind is like when you’re not thinking…' he wonders. 'A kind of ebbing darkness until memories start to appear'
Then suddenly scenes from the past start to form in front of him. His eyes widen as they dart from one memory to the other, taking in the situations.
He realizes that the memories weren’t only about him, but of his brothers, the other four members.
That time he was living alone in Seoul, struggling to make a living and trying to sell odds and ends. The time Yunho got poisoned and everyone was in a state of panic. The time he drank and drove. . . and regretted it dearly. The time he broke his leg. The car crash. The struggle with his parents. The time they all thought they couldn’t make it in Japan.
The tears, the sadness, the frustration.
As the scenes flash past him, Jae clutches his head in desperation, trying to figure out why they were appearing again.
'No, no… enough! Stop! Where’s this leading to? What’s the point of all these past memories and anguish? What-'
He stops, seeing new images forming in front of him. This time, the faces were unfamiliar.
It’s nighttime in different cities and the insides of houses are brightly lit with a welcoming sort of atmosphere. Looking through the windows, he sees various girls doing their own things- watching tv, eating, sitting in their room listening to music, about to go to sleep… different girls with one similarity- they have a sad look in their eyes as they lift their faces up to their windows and look out at the night sky.
Somehow he knows that they are connected to what he saw before- his difficult past and suffering. Something in him tells him they must be crying for him and for the other members, seeing what they’ve gone through.
Then he sees other faces, silhouettes underneath windows, girls' faces illuminated by the moon. They lean on their windowsills, lifting their faces up towards the moon and move their lips in silent prayer.
And somehow, he can hear fragments of each prayer, little whispers here and there.
'Please, let them be okay'
'…protect them'
'Keep them safe and well….'
'…never make them suffer...anymore…'
'Please….please…'
A little softly-glowing orb emerges from each prayer. They slowly float out of each window into the night sky, weaving around as they go.
They all combine into one silent, radiant collision that, for a moment, even outshines the light of the moon.
He shields his eyes from the brightness and once he blinks open his eyes again he opens them in astonishment-
To find a beautiful, serene angel clothed in white floating there before him, the moon’s rays falling on her and outlining her in a sheer silvery-white glow.
She smiles down at Hero, who looks back astonished, not knowing what to do.
Without opening her mouth, she starts speaking to Hero.
“Jaejoong…”
Jae gulps and looks around. Somehow he's managed to float up to where the angel was. The homes and streets below have disappeared and all that's left around him is the dark sky filled with stars and, in front of him, the moon and the angel.
"I am Cassiopeia.”
His eyes widen at her words, not believing what he hears.
"I am your guardian, your protector. I was sent to watch over you. That is why I'm here. Any time you needed help, any where you went, I followed...along with all of your fans' prayers."
He feels his heart beating loudly in his ears, and moistens his lips as he tries to form his words.
“So…so you’re the one who’s been doing this? This morning with Changmin… back in the States with Xiah...” Jae says
“...In Paris with you?” she smiles. “You know you were really stubborn then. But yes, that was me…"
He continuously blinks, not knowing what to say.
"...so angels really do exist" he finally says dumbly.
She laughs. "Yes, we exist. We aren't seen, but only felt. When you close your eyes and let go of everything- that's when you can truly see everything."
Her finger gently reaches up and touches the tip of hi's nose. "And now that I've told you all that you know, I must go..."
"W-wait, wait! I don't understand!! I have so many questions and the others-!"
He stretches out his hand as if trying to reach for her, as she gently floats back and seems to melt into the moon.
"Wait!" He jumps up from bed. He looks around, remembering where he is.
In bed, in the hotel. He quickly glances at the others and sees that they are all sleeping soundly.
He sighs and hauls himself out of bed, to the balcony on his right that was overlooking the sea.
Jaejoong sighs again, lowering his head and placing his hands on the railing. He tries to collect his thoughts and figure out what the dream was about. He remembered it, clear as anything, but he still didn't know what to feel. Happy? Grateful? Surprised?
...all he felt was confused. Big time.
'What should I do? I know now I can't go back to sleep at all. I'll toss and turn for the rest of the night...' he exhales and closes his eyes. He feels the cool sea breeze ruffle his shirt and cool him down.
Slowly, he frees his mind from all thoughts and tries to relax. With eyes closed, he feels the moon falling on his skin, smells the waters, hears the lulling of the waves, tastes sweet air scented with jasmines.
His mind is blank, clean. He feels the air, the sea, the moon...
...and senses he’s not alone anymore.
"I told you you could do it..." he hears a smiling voice by his side. He opens his eyes and looks to his right. There was nothing there. He smiles and continues looking at that spot. Slowly, as if materializing from an invisible mist, the angel appears by his side.
"I thought you disappeared..."
"I will never disappear. Not as long as there are people who continue to believe in you all"
Jaejoong exhales. What to ask her first? His fans, his brothers, himself? His sight travels to the horizon, then up to the moon and stars.
"Look..." she gracefully lifts her hand and points to one constellation in particular, shining brighter than the others. He squints and then parts his mouth in amazement.
"Cassiopeia...." he breathes.
She nods and smiles. "Whatever your fans say are strong and powerful since they come from the heart. Just like the constellation of Cassiopeia will forever shine in the sky, so will your fans' love for you. Because every night when anyone looks up to the stars, they will see the constellation...and they will be reminded."
Jaejoong blinks, absorbing all that she said. A smile spreads across his face as he beams in the moonlight.
"Thank you...I will definitely remember this and pass this on to my brothers. I've learned so much tonight. I will be more careful and wise in the future. I hope I will change for the better."
He looks over at her and notices she's starting to become transparent.
"You have a good heart Jaejoong" she smiles, "All of you have grown and matured. I’m sure now you can take care of yourselves and the ones you love. You’re more experienced with life and you don’t need me as much anymore. I will be around, but now it’s time for me to stand back and let you take care of yourselves. And those whom you love.”
With that, she closes her eyes and disappears.
He stands there, stunned for a moment before shaking his head and smiling to himself. Taking one last look at the night scenery and a lungful of sea air, he walks back into the bedroom.
He leaves the balcony door slightly open, letting the breeze brush in and the moon shine on his bed. As he lays his head on the pillow, a sweet sleep overtakes him again.
The next day Jaejoong wakes up to a beautiful blue sky peeking out from between the balcony doors and window shutters. He sits up, stretching and smiling to himself from last night’s encounter. Or, should he say, miracle.
He slides off the bed, washes up, and meets the others out on the balcony for their breakfast.
The others were already seated.
“Morning hyung!” Yunho cheerfully greets Jaejoong as Yoosu both offer him grins before they go back to heaping their plates with food. Changmin offers him a smile, already half-way through a watermelon.
“So, as I was saying before, I had the strangest dream last night” Junsu continued telling the others.
“You don’t say” Chun slightly teased. “Aren’t you the one who always has strange dreams?”
“Well, it had something to do with our fans. I mean, our fan’s love. And that one time where I almost fell off the apple tree like a fool. And then…something about an angel appearing…”
“Really specific Junsu ah, really descriptive” Changmin says sarcastically.
“Honestly! And then, and then, this angel, she actually appeared on our balcony! Right there!” Junsu points to the edge of the balcony that overlooked the beach below.
Jaejoong froze in mid-action of putting a piece of fruit into his mouth.
“I just saw her back but she was very pretty I know. I don’t remember saying anything to her but then she whispers something before she gently fades away. And the next thing I know I’m looking up at the moon and stars and I see Cassiopeia constellation shining. Then I woke up.”
The other four put down their plates simultaneously. Changmin even had his mouth half-openso Jae had to lean over and cover his mouth which still had food inside.
“You’ve got to be kidding…” Yunho started. “That was~”
“The exact same dream I had!” Yoomin exclaim at the same time. They turn and look at each other.
Jaejoong looks lowers his gaze and smiles in thought.
“What about you hyung? You too?” Junsu asks Jae.
He shifts in his seat and clears his throat. “I had the same dream too. . . .”
“I can’t believe it” Junsu says. “We had the same dream last night. Do you think it’s true?”
“Well why not? Anything’s possible” Yunho smiles. “I think it’s sweet. I’m grateful to our fans.”
“It certainly explains all the close calls we’ve had for the past few years” Yoochun laughs.
“But now that we know…we ought to take care of ourselves better~” Jaejoong says. “Plus, we should take care not only of ourselves but of the people around us that we love and care.”
“Ah! Speaking of which, are you guys planning on doing anything today with the girls?” Yunho jerks his head in the direction of the neighboring room where the five girls were staying in.
The balcony windows were still shut, meaning that the girls were still asleep. It was still pretty early in the morning- around 7ish.
Junsu ruffles his hair and sheepishly says “Eiko and I are probably going to the park to play soccer and have a picnic there. Then we’re going to hike around.”
“Well me and Olina are going to go into town to window-shop and look for souvenirs and things like that” Yoochun says. “We’re probably going to also walk along the harbor like we did last night.”
“Rita’s taking me to her old neighborhood in town. Then she’s going to take me to her house out of the city. There are orchards of fruits there and it’s picking season so she has to pick them all now~” Min says. Even though he just finished breakfast, he was already thinking about the next meal.
Then his face brightens up as he thinks of another thing. “Oh, and she said later on tonight we could all go over to her to stay for dinner…”
“Aileen and I are going down to the beach and swimming for a while. She said the other day they found this quiet beach that none of the tourists know about. Should be fun” Yunho says.
“I talked with Janet yesterday and she agreed to show me the field where they found those flowers. Apparently it has a really nice view of the sea from there. I’m going to go take some pictures and then we’ll go to town and browse around. ” Jae says.
"*sigh* Tomorrow'll be our last day... Such a short vacation. I wish we could have spent more time here!" Changmin sighs.
"Gonna miss the food eh?" Junsu teases.
"I'm guessing it's not only the food but also another type of appetite as well" Yoochun winks as Min lets out a "yahh!"
They finish up and bring the plates in. Taking a deep breath and sighing, Jae walks to the end of the balcony. The others exchange glances and follow him. They stand there, overlooking the water, each one with their arms on each other's shoulders.
"This'll be our unforgettable vacation, right? We learned a lot here~" he says.
He glances from the corner of his eye and smiles as a figure in white slowly fades away into thin air. A group of seagulls fly out to sea, soon becoming one with the horizon.
~ΤΕΛΟΣ~
Pairings: Hints of Yunjae, Yoosu
Rating: G
Genre: Adventure, General
Length: 9 chapters
A/N: This was my first ever fanfic, written way back in Summer '08 when I first found out about TVXQ.
Summary: The guys take a hard-earned break in the Mediterranean one summer, as they recount all their close-calls that happened in their past. Each member has his own story to tell. . .with the help of an angel :3
~~~~~CHAPTER 9~~~~~
'What’s this? Where- where am I?' Jaejoong thinks as he swirls around in the recesses of his mind, the thoughts in his imagination.
He’s floating on a dark fog.
'So this is what the inside of a mind is like when you’re not thinking…' he wonders. 'A kind of ebbing darkness until memories start to appear'
Then suddenly scenes from the past start to form in front of him. His eyes widen as they dart from one memory to the other, taking in the situations.
He realizes that the memories weren’t only about him, but of his brothers, the other four members.
That time he was living alone in Seoul, struggling to make a living and trying to sell odds and ends. The time Yunho got poisoned and everyone was in a state of panic. The time he drank and drove. . . and regretted it dearly. The time he broke his leg. The car crash. The struggle with his parents. The time they all thought they couldn’t make it in Japan.
The tears, the sadness, the frustration.
As the scenes flash past him, Jae clutches his head in desperation, trying to figure out why they were appearing again.
'No, no… enough! Stop! Where’s this leading to? What’s the point of all these past memories and anguish? What-'
He stops, seeing new images forming in front of him. This time, the faces were unfamiliar.
It’s nighttime in different cities and the insides of houses are brightly lit with a welcoming sort of atmosphere. Looking through the windows, he sees various girls doing their own things- watching tv, eating, sitting in their room listening to music, about to go to sleep… different girls with one similarity- they have a sad look in their eyes as they lift their faces up to their windows and look out at the night sky.
Somehow he knows that they are connected to what he saw before- his difficult past and suffering. Something in him tells him they must be crying for him and for the other members, seeing what they’ve gone through.
Then he sees other faces, silhouettes underneath windows, girls' faces illuminated by the moon. They lean on their windowsills, lifting their faces up towards the moon and move their lips in silent prayer.
And somehow, he can hear fragments of each prayer, little whispers here and there.
'Please, let them be okay'
'…protect them'
'Keep them safe and well….'
'…never make them suffer...anymore…'
'Please….please…'
A little softly-glowing orb emerges from each prayer. They slowly float out of each window into the night sky, weaving around as they go.
They all combine into one silent, radiant collision that, for a moment, even outshines the light of the moon.
He shields his eyes from the brightness and once he blinks open his eyes again he opens them in astonishment-
To find a beautiful, serene angel clothed in white floating there before him, the moon’s rays falling on her and outlining her in a sheer silvery-white glow.
She smiles down at Hero, who looks back astonished, not knowing what to do.
Without opening her mouth, she starts speaking to Hero.
“Jaejoong…”
Jae gulps and looks around. Somehow he's managed to float up to where the angel was. The homes and streets below have disappeared and all that's left around him is the dark sky filled with stars and, in front of him, the moon and the angel.
"I am Cassiopeia.”
His eyes widen at her words, not believing what he hears.
"I am your guardian, your protector. I was sent to watch over you. That is why I'm here. Any time you needed help, any where you went, I followed...along with all of your fans' prayers."
He feels his heart beating loudly in his ears, and moistens his lips as he tries to form his words.
“So…so you’re the one who’s been doing this? This morning with Changmin… back in the States with Xiah...” Jae says
“...In Paris with you?” she smiles. “You know you were really stubborn then. But yes, that was me…"
He continuously blinks, not knowing what to say.
"...so angels really do exist" he finally says dumbly.
She laughs. "Yes, we exist. We aren't seen, but only felt. When you close your eyes and let go of everything- that's when you can truly see everything."
Her finger gently reaches up and touches the tip of hi's nose. "And now that I've told you all that you know, I must go..."
"W-wait, wait! I don't understand!! I have so many questions and the others-!"
He stretches out his hand as if trying to reach for her, as she gently floats back and seems to melt into the moon.
"Wait!" He jumps up from bed. He looks around, remembering where he is.
In bed, in the hotel. He quickly glances at the others and sees that they are all sleeping soundly.
He sighs and hauls himself out of bed, to the balcony on his right that was overlooking the sea.
Jaejoong sighs again, lowering his head and placing his hands on the railing. He tries to collect his thoughts and figure out what the dream was about. He remembered it, clear as anything, but he still didn't know what to feel. Happy? Grateful? Surprised?
...all he felt was confused. Big time.
'What should I do? I know now I can't go back to sleep at all. I'll toss and turn for the rest of the night...' he exhales and closes his eyes. He feels the cool sea breeze ruffle his shirt and cool him down.
Slowly, he frees his mind from all thoughts and tries to relax. With eyes closed, he feels the moon falling on his skin, smells the waters, hears the lulling of the waves, tastes sweet air scented with jasmines.
His mind is blank, clean. He feels the air, the sea, the moon...
...and senses he’s not alone anymore.
"I told you you could do it..." he hears a smiling voice by his side. He opens his eyes and looks to his right. There was nothing there. He smiles and continues looking at that spot. Slowly, as if materializing from an invisible mist, the angel appears by his side.
"I thought you disappeared..."
"I will never disappear. Not as long as there are people who continue to believe in you all"
Jaejoong exhales. What to ask her first? His fans, his brothers, himself? His sight travels to the horizon, then up to the moon and stars.
"Look..." she gracefully lifts her hand and points to one constellation in particular, shining brighter than the others. He squints and then parts his mouth in amazement.
"Cassiopeia...." he breathes.
She nods and smiles. "Whatever your fans say are strong and powerful since they come from the heart. Just like the constellation of Cassiopeia will forever shine in the sky, so will your fans' love for you. Because every night when anyone looks up to the stars, they will see the constellation...and they will be reminded."
Jaejoong blinks, absorbing all that she said. A smile spreads across his face as he beams in the moonlight.
"Thank you...I will definitely remember this and pass this on to my brothers. I've learned so much tonight. I will be more careful and wise in the future. I hope I will change for the better."
He looks over at her and notices she's starting to become transparent.
"You have a good heart Jaejoong" she smiles, "All of you have grown and matured. I’m sure now you can take care of yourselves and the ones you love. You’re more experienced with life and you don’t need me as much anymore. I will be around, but now it’s time for me to stand back and let you take care of yourselves. And those whom you love.”
With that, she closes her eyes and disappears.
He stands there, stunned for a moment before shaking his head and smiling to himself. Taking one last look at the night scenery and a lungful of sea air, he walks back into the bedroom.
He leaves the balcony door slightly open, letting the breeze brush in and the moon shine on his bed. As he lays his head on the pillow, a sweet sleep overtakes him again.
The next day Jaejoong wakes up to a beautiful blue sky peeking out from between the balcony doors and window shutters. He sits up, stretching and smiling to himself from last night’s encounter. Or, should he say, miracle.
He slides off the bed, washes up, and meets the others out on the balcony for their breakfast.
The others were already seated.
“Morning hyung!” Yunho cheerfully greets Jaejoong as Yoosu both offer him grins before they go back to heaping their plates with food. Changmin offers him a smile, already half-way through a watermelon.
“So, as I was saying before, I had the strangest dream last night” Junsu continued telling the others.
“You don’t say” Chun slightly teased. “Aren’t you the one who always has strange dreams?”
“Well, it had something to do with our fans. I mean, our fan’s love. And that one time where I almost fell off the apple tree like a fool. And then…something about an angel appearing…”
“Really specific Junsu ah, really descriptive” Changmin says sarcastically.
“Honestly! And then, and then, this angel, she actually appeared on our balcony! Right there!” Junsu points to the edge of the balcony that overlooked the beach below.
Jaejoong froze in mid-action of putting a piece of fruit into his mouth.
“I just saw her back but she was very pretty I know. I don’t remember saying anything to her but then she whispers something before she gently fades away. And the next thing I know I’m looking up at the moon and stars and I see Cassiopeia constellation shining. Then I woke up.”
The other four put down their plates simultaneously. Changmin even had his mouth half-openso Jae had to lean over and cover his mouth which still had food inside.
“You’ve got to be kidding…” Yunho started. “That was~”
“The exact same dream I had!” Yoomin exclaim at the same time. They turn and look at each other.
Jaejoong looks lowers his gaze and smiles in thought.
“What about you hyung? You too?” Junsu asks Jae.
He shifts in his seat and clears his throat. “I had the same dream too. . . .”
“I can’t believe it” Junsu says. “We had the same dream last night. Do you think it’s true?”
“Well why not? Anything’s possible” Yunho smiles. “I think it’s sweet. I’m grateful to our fans.”
“It certainly explains all the close calls we’ve had for the past few years” Yoochun laughs.
“But now that we know…we ought to take care of ourselves better~” Jaejoong says. “Plus, we should take care not only of ourselves but of the people around us that we love and care.”
“Ah! Speaking of which, are you guys planning on doing anything today with the girls?” Yunho jerks his head in the direction of the neighboring room where the five girls were staying in.
The balcony windows were still shut, meaning that the girls were still asleep. It was still pretty early in the morning- around 7ish.
Junsu ruffles his hair and sheepishly says “Eiko and I are probably going to the park to play soccer and have a picnic there. Then we’re going to hike around.”
“Well me and Olina are going to go into town to window-shop and look for souvenirs and things like that” Yoochun says. “We’re probably going to also walk along the harbor like we did last night.”
“Rita’s taking me to her old neighborhood in town. Then she’s going to take me to her house out of the city. There are orchards of fruits there and it’s picking season so she has to pick them all now~” Min says. Even though he just finished breakfast, he was already thinking about the next meal.
Then his face brightens up as he thinks of another thing. “Oh, and she said later on tonight we could all go over to her to stay for dinner…”
“Aileen and I are going down to the beach and swimming for a while. She said the other day they found this quiet beach that none of the tourists know about. Should be fun” Yunho says.
“I talked with Janet yesterday and she agreed to show me the field where they found those flowers. Apparently it has a really nice view of the sea from there. I’m going to go take some pictures and then we’ll go to town and browse around. ” Jae says.
"*sigh* Tomorrow'll be our last day... Such a short vacation. I wish we could have spent more time here!" Changmin sighs.
"Gonna miss the food eh?" Junsu teases.
"I'm guessing it's not only the food but also another type of appetite as well" Yoochun winks as Min lets out a "yahh!"
They finish up and bring the plates in. Taking a deep breath and sighing, Jae walks to the end of the balcony. The others exchange glances and follow him. They stand there, overlooking the water, each one with their arms on each other's shoulders.
"This'll be our unforgettable vacation, right? We learned a lot here~" he says.
He glances from the corner of his eye and smiles as a figure in white slowly fades away into thin air. A group of seagulls fly out to sea, soon becoming one with the horizon.
~ΤΕΛΟΣ~