La Coincidence~ Chapter 23
Title: La Coincidence
Pairings: Changmin/fc with hints of yunjae and yoosu
Rating: G
Genre: Drama, Real life, General
Length: Chapters
Summary: It all started with a coincidence. One accident, one helping hand, one small step. And soon it leads to so much more. . .
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~CHAPTER 23~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It’s the fourth week of the month. November is drawing to a close. Min Ri’s establishment in the house has long been used to and almost familiar, at least for the guys.
But in the back of her mind, no matter how she goes through her days smiling and laughing, the thought looms in her head. And gets heavier with each visit- inhaling the hospital scent, grasping the hand that seems to feel a bit colder day by day, looking at those eyes that should have opened long ago.
“Oh Soo Young…what’s taking so long? Is it the medication? The procedure? Why aren’t you awake yet?”
As she sighs and lowers her head after saying this, a doctor comes in, knocking on the door gently.
“Excuse me miss,” he clears his throat. Min RI looks up and turns, nodding to the doctor.
“Yes, doctor?”
“All tests we’ve run routinely each week yield no results. No improvement, no change.”
“Then~” Min Ri blinks her eyes, mind still not registering what the doctor meant. “I don’t understand, what are you trying to say?”
“In these cases, the longer the time drags on, the less likely for the patient to be cured or to wake up” -the doctor continues despite Min RI’s eyes widening to their full extent- “And it has already been a month. All has been done so I’m afraid now all that is left is the choice~”
“Wait a minute, no no, please, wait…” Min Ri cuts in, not wanting to hear the following words.
The doctor blinks and then responds in a dry kind of way, “Yes?” Obviously he’s never been talked to like that before.
Min Ri licks her lips to moisten them and gain time.
“No… nothing can be done?”
Her mind comes up with no suggestions, no solutions. The doctor shakes his head.
“None whatsoever. We’ve done all that we could. The rest is up to you.”
He puts a hand on Min Ri’s shoulder. “The most we can do is keep her on the system for another week at most. But you or her family have to make the choice to either keep her on, or take her off. But let me say that chances are dim, no matter how long you keep her on the support. You’re only hurting her and yourself more.”
He looks sadly at Min Ri. “I’m sorry.”
'Sorry? He says sorry? He’s already acting like Soo Young’s gone! But she’s right here!' Min Ri tightly grasps Soo Young’s hand, expecting to feel a light squeeze in return. But the hand lays limply in her own.
She sighs and looks down at the floor, unmoving.
“Do you have the contact information of her family?” Min Ri slowly shakes her heavy head.
“No…” she takes a deep breath. “As far as I know, as far as she’s told me, she has no family. She’s…” Min Ri breaks off, suddenly a lump in her throat started forming.
“I see…” the doctor says. “Then, I know this is a difficult situation for you, taking responsibility of your friend’s life in your hands, but sometime this week, please inform the hospital of the decision. Or see me when you are ready. My office is just down the hall.”
The doctor continues, trying to help this youngster in front of him as much as he possibly can. “If you two ever had, in your conversations, discussed something like this, do you remember your friend ever telling you her opinion about being in this physical state? If she did, or if you two ever mentioned this subject and discussed it seriously for whatever reason, then that is as good a consent as her family’s- even better, since the declaration came from herself.” The doctor stops, trying to let it all sink in.
In a lower tone, he says, “Go home for the day. I know it must be painful, but try to think.” He smiles a bit to Min Ri and bows before walking out of the room.
'Think back…' Min Ri repeats, her eyes staring off into the long corridor, following the doctor’s leave.
“Think back…” Min RI repeats to herself, curled up into a ball on the couch with her knees drawn to her chest, staring over at the blank tv screen in front of her.
“Think back what?” Yunho says, plopping down next to her and peering at her curiously.
Min Ri sighs, shaking her head and trying to throw off the stupor she was in. The last thing she wants if for the others to find out, be dragged into this, and let this affect them, all because of her. No, this was her burden, so she alone will carry the weight.
“Nothing Yunho oppa, nothing…”
Yunho arches an eyebrow, sticking out his lower lip. “Are you sure it’s nothing?”
She offers a small smile and attempts to slightly divert the question. “Have you ever seen this movie? I don’t remember the title, but the story was kinda like helping out a friend. And I was thinking, if you had a friend in trouble~”
Yunho pulls his legs up on the couch and turns his body towards Min Ri, leaning over slightly, listening intently. Helping others in need was his specialty, especially any friend.
“Would you do what your friend begs you to do in that situation or what you think is the best option? And which would be considered the best and not selfish?”
Ooh, that’s a tough question. Yunho bites his lip, pouting in concentration. He scratches his head thoughtfully and clutches the couch pillow in front of him.
“I guess I’d have to say I’d respect my friend’s decision and do what they wish in that circumstance. Except~” here he interjects sharply, “only after doing my best to make my thought work and exhausting all other possibilities. Only after I fight long and hard for my best actions will I turn to what my friend suggested.”
Min Ri sighs heavily. Yunho peers down at her.
“Did that help at all?” he asks. She glances at him and gives him a small smile.
“Yes, it did help Yunho~ Thank you”
He beams as he says “No problem” and bounces up from the couch, strethching his arms above his head, loudly declaring, “Ahhh I’m hungry! Hey Jaejoong! Any food to eat?”
followed by Jaejoong’s “It’s not dinner time yet, have patience!!!”
. . . . Soo Young did tell her what she wanted to happen in that situation.
Min Ri was lying face up on the couch, unable to fall asleep, rethinking the possibilities over and over. She still remembers that memory vividly- the two of them were at a café a couple years ago, discussing some things about life- college, jobs, families, the like.
Among the things they talked about was the choice of respect for a friend.
I “f I was ever trapped in a situation where I couldn’t live- couldn’t breathe, couldn’t eat, couldn’t see the sunlight~” Soo Young said, sitting across from Min Ri at the little table, looking out at the scenery and stirring her tea with a spoon, “I would rather die.”
She tears her eyes away from the sunshine spreading its warmth outside to look into Min Ri’s surprised eyes with her own serious ones.
“I would rather die, plain and simple. I’d rather be removed from that half-life.”
Min Ri arched her eyebrow and half smiled, trying to lighten the mood and get her friend back to her cheery usual self, saying, “Aren’t you being a little macabre though? There’s always room for hope-”
“No. Not in that case…even with the slim chance of hope, I wouldn’t change my choice. Because after that ordeal, how would you enjoy life again, constantly haunted by that memory of what you went through. It’s a sleep-like death, a half-life.”
At that, Min RI felt silent, brooding over her own opinion on the matter- which was to cling on to the last possible hope until the end, to see if there would be a turn of events. But that’d situation would never happen to them, she thought, as she turn and smiled to Soo Young, who grinned back and started another topic of conversation.
That’d never happen to anyone. . .
She didn’t realize she had been crying. Now, as she was lying there on the couch, staring up at the ceiling, she felt her damp cheek, a tear already working its way down her face.
“Thank god… Changmin is not here tonight…” she says in a shaky voice, the softness of her tone carrying on through the darkness of the room. A sob racks her body out of nowhere.
“I don’t think I could take it if he did come…” and with that her hands cover her face as she silently lets her tears and frustrations out, only the occasional sniffle or gasp heard.
Farther away, hidden by the darkness in the hall, Changmin stands silently in the corridor, back against the wall, head down, listening. His eyes narrow and his hand tightens into a fist at what he hears, his arm shaking from the exertion until he lets out a frustrated sigh and loosens his hand, tilting his head in the direction of the living room, hearing her sobs and yearning to go over as he always did and comfort her the way his mother comforted him.
Jaejoong may be in charge of comforting everyone in general, but only he knew these secret cries to sleep, the secret sadness hidden by the night. And this time, she shuns his help. He himself heard it clearly said- she didn’t want him at that moment and wanted him gone. And that’s what angered him- more than his curiosity over what upset her so much- that she never once sought out his help, but lay there alone, never getting up and dragging him out of bed which he gladly would have done- but lying there until by chance he came to her.
He wasn’t a psychic. He didn’t always know when she was hurting, didn’t always wake up each night to go and check on her. There was only so much that he could do. As he turns his back and walks heavily to the bedroom, he hears Min Ri softly exclaim, “How am I ever going to make this decision?”
He halts in his steps for a moment, then resumes them into the bedroom.
'I will find out more about this ‘choice’ she has to make. And she will tell me' he thinks as he closes the door and settles back in his bed.
Far away in the living room, Min Ri hasn’t heard at all the intrusion she feared. “Soo Young…” she sighs. “Soo Young…” feeling herself slipping away slowly as she loses consciousness.
“Good morning!” Min Ri greets as she settles herself in the chair, doing her best and smiling at the others around the table.
“Rise and shine!” Jaejoog chirps happily, as he grins at his success in flipping a pancake for the first time and able to still keep it within the pot.
“Well, look who finally woke up!” Yunho grins as he then turns over and continues talking to Yoochun about something. Yoochun sleepily nods a hello to Min Ri, a Cheshire cat smile spreading across his face for her before it’s finally overridden by a large yawn.
Junsu’s eyes sparkle as he beams at Min Ri, bright as the morning sun, which was forming a halo around his hair. He already had his knife and fork in hand, waiting to start eating. Changmin glowers at Min RI, scrutinizing her facial expressions as she greeted the others that morning.
'So she masks it all behind a smile…she’s even fooled her eyes into smiling…' he thinks as she reaches over for a slice of bread.
His glower quickly dissipates as he sees Min Ri turn over to him and gingerly nods a ‘good morning’ to him. He silently nods back, trying at a half-smile with one corner of his mouth curled up.
'I shouldn’t openly confront her about it, she might not take it well… best watch what she does for the day ' And so Changmin’s plan acting as a spy starts.
-Later-
The morning yielded no pleasing results for Changmin, but by midday his efforts were fulfilled.
“Guys, I’m going out for a while, is that okay?”
“Okay!” a chorus comes from the different study rooms to meet her.
'These past few days she has been routinely leaving to go somewhere…' Changmin notes. 'For about the past week, in fact.'
“Would you like me to go with you?” Changmin creeps up behind Min Ri and asks her, startling her as she was putting on her coat.
“Oh Changmin…” she whirls around and puts a hand over her heart.
“Would you like me to accompany you?” Changmin tries to take the coldness out of the question and smiles slightly to soften his tone.
Min Ri stares at him- his mouth hay have been smiling but his eyes took a while to soften as his smile did.
“N-no it’s alright. I’ll be back in a while so don’t worry!”
“Alright” Changmin says, knowing better than to push it. He waits until she leaves, counts to a minute slowly, and takes his own jacket and follows her. Hands buried deep into the pockets of his trench coat, he hunches deeper into the collar of his coat, letting the scarf warm his mouth and lips as his breaths puff out into clouds of air. It was cold, but his eyes were sharp and locked onto her figure in the distance and stayed there.
He saw her hail a cab and took one himself, merely telling the driver to follow the other car. The driver gave a quizzical, questioning look, about to ask, “Is this a joke? Am I on a detective movie or a candid camera set?” but one glance through the rear view mirror at Changmin’s dark eyes silenced any questions in him. He follows the cab to its destination. Getting out of the cab he has just enough time to catch Min Ri walking through the front doors of the hospital.
'So this is where she’s going each day!' Changmin thinks, his curiosity finally satiated.
He contemplates the idea of walking in and then confronting her about it, but he knows she’ll take it badly. So, he contents himself with hopping onto the bus and heading back to the park near their apartment. As he slowly walks around, looking at the scenery, he lets his thought take over.
'Why has she been visiting her friend more often lately? Why hasn’t she told us where she goes and, more importantly, why is she smiling more and more, acting like nothing’s wrong? Why hasn’t she asked us to go with her or help? What would that choice that she was talking about mean? Last night was certainly alarming>>
He sighs and sits down on a bench, resting his chin on his hands. He remains deep in thought until he subconsciously checks his watch.
“Oh it’s been half an hour already. She must be on her way back then…” Changmin murmurs, straightening his back and stretching on the bench. He looks down the pathway and sees a familiar figure approaching him.
Min Ri always asks the cab driver to drop her off directly in front of the apartment- or at least at the mart one block away so she could go buy groceries and make it look like that's where she was. But today she felt she had to walk a bit to let her mind free for a while. The part beckoned to her and invited her to come for a stroll, so on her way back she motions to the driver to stop there, one block short of her destination.
As she walks through the park at her own pace, she sighs and feel the branches rustle overhead in response.
“What am I going to do? What am I going to do?” she constantly repeats.
“No change again today, no improvement. Never responds to what I say, never responds to what I plead, when I hold her hand, when I shake her. I really don’t want this anymore…”
All thoughts clouding her mind, even the faces of the guys, each are slowly pushed out until they are all replaced by Soo Young’s face and the one question that arises from it all.
“. . .What should I do?” Min Ri halts in the middle of the walkway, looking up at the sky. Of course, there is no answer as the clouds merely roll on overhead, the wind gently blowing.
She sighs and bends her head over, slowly starting to walk again. “I shouldn’t be that far from the apartment now I guess…” she muses to herself.
With effort, she lifts her head up to the path in front of her, following the rows of benches on each side until they converge to a point in the distance. She follows the path of benches with her eyes back down, until a tall, dark figure disrupts the pattern of the benches.
A tall, dark figure standing, looking in her direction. A slightly familiar figure. . .
As she gets closer she finally sees his face. With a surprised gasp of “Changmin!” she makes it known he was the last person she expected to see, and by far the most dreaded.
He says nothing, but his eyes conveyed everything. He parted his lips as if to speak but she beat him to it.
“Changmin!” she repeats.
“Why are………aren’t you cold?” she settles for a less harmful question instead of asking him why he was there, for fear he might redirect the question to her.
Which is exactly what he noticed and did.
“Where did you go?” he said coldly. But before giving time to Min Ri to answer or even think about it he says, “And don’t bother coming up with excuses or explanations.”
Min Ri moistens her lips. Changmin’s eyes follow that motion. She darts a glance at him. His eyes still unwaver on her own.
“I was…I was…” she sighs. She risks another glance up at him.
If it was any other member, she could fool them, but with Changmin there’s no way of getting past him. Besides, she’d might as well admit it now quickly in one breath and get it over with, rather than having to sort out an entire complex mess later on.
“I was at the hospital,” she sighs.
He nods. “I saw you there” he admits, ignoring her shocked face.
Since she finally admitted the truth to him, he had better tell the truth as well, this way they’re both on the same level.
“But what were you doing at the hospital?” he inquires, eyes boring into hers.
She fumbles and looks down at the ground. “You know…just…visiting Soo Young.”
The answer doesn’t satisfy him.
“I’ll wait,” he says. “I’ve got all day if I have to.”
A gust of cold wind suddenly blows. Min Ri flinches, looking up at him as he stood to his full height. He was using it as an advantage, looking down at her. She knows it isn’t curiosity that goads him on, but then what was it? Was it genuine concern for Soo Young or fate trying to make her life hell at the moment?
She sighs and looks over at the benches, blocks of wood without heart, feelings, as Changmin says, “Let’s sit.”
She walks over and sits heavily, hands deep in her pockets, hiding her mouth into her scarf, staring at the ground in front of her. Changmin sits right next to her, his leg touching hers, leaving no room between them as if indicating that he’d press her to the end to get her to confide in him.
“Well, it’s Soo Young. Her condition…” and just like that, Min RI little by little tells him the story, as he silently listens, soaking everything in.
“So you see…” she finishes breathless, leaving a cloud of air float out before her. “I’m in this predicament. This serious dilemma, and I don’t want~”
“I know, I know.” Changmin says. “You don’t want to lose your friend. But you don’t want to make this decision.”
He sighs, feeling a huge migraine coming on from all that she told him. Who knew this was what she was hiding.
“But you know…sometimes life purposefully deals us these cards, as if to test our morals. It’s like a challenge to see how much you can take.”
“Well, I’m up to, if not past my breaking point in life and I don’t want anymore of this.”
He lays a hand on her shoulder. “All I can say is, have strength. Have patience. The answer will come to you when you are ready for it.”
She sighs. Telling him what was bothering her did little to lift the burden still weighing down on her.
“But promise me this…”
“Mmm?” Changmin softly says, bending over closely to hear her words.
“Don’t tell the others. Swear upon this. Or…or I’ll never forgive you, nor talk to you again.” She looks at him with her most serious face.
Changmin was stumped, since he was considering telling his hyungs. After all, they were more experienced and have gone through more ordeals than he has. But of course, respecting Min Ri's plead, he nods a "yes" and wraps one arm around her, standing up and saying, "Come on, let's go home."
Min Ri forces down a swallow and nods. "Yeah...let's go h-ho.....let's go back..."
"Min Ri ah, welcome back! You too Changmin!" Jaejoong appears at the door, beaming in his apron as he ushers the two of them inside and takes off Min Ri's coat and hangs it up for her.
Min RI and Changmin exchange curious looks.
"How did you know we were coming hyung?" changmin asks
"Oh, I heard footsteps in the hallway and the front door clicking" Jaejoong calmly says
"You usually don't help with our coats" Changmin notes
"Nonsense, why wouldn't I? I'm in a cleaning mood and besides, it's nice to do a little act of kindness each day!" Jaejoong pouts.
"That's not kindness that's trying to act chivalrous in front of a lady!" Changmin points out.
Min Ri lets out a laugh. "I'll get going then you two..." she says as she slips past the two of them quickly.
"I'll go see if there's any laundry to wash or collect first!"
The two nod, Jaejoong smiling as Min Ri walks away, but just as Changmin makes to walk off as well, in the direction of the bedroom, Jaejoong grabs him by the elbow.
"Wait. I want to talk to you." Changmin turns around incredulously and sees Jaejoong's moments ago happy face change to one of utmost seriousness.
He leads Changmin to the kitchen table and the two of them sit down, close together. Jaejoong leans in closely to Changmin, his head bent down, as Changmin looks at him surprised, leaning back against his chair as far away from Jaejoong as possible, wondering why all the closeness and secrecy.
"I know you probably know more about Min Ri than the rest of us" Jaejoong starts.
Changmin opens his mouth to retaliate out of surprise but Jaejoong holds up a hand.
"Be it your same age or whatever, I just want to know one thing. As I was hanging up her coat, I caught the faint smell of sanitizer, the kind of strong, sharp smell only found in hospitals. So tell me~" Jaejoong looks at Changmin with dark, piercing eyes, their heads almost touching, his serious face still there. "Was she at the hospital or not?"
CHangmin was momentarily shocked, his mouth agape as he stared at his hyung. He never thought Jaejoong would catch up this quickly, merely a little while after he HIMSELF confronted Min Ri about this at the part.
"Well, was she at the hospital or not? The others are worried as well"
'Especially Yunho, who was telling me she was asking him something strange yesterday' Jaejoong thinks
Changmin looks back at Jaejoong seeing the concern in the other's eyes. He remembers his promise to Min Ri, inwardly sighs, and says, "Hyung. I'm very sorry. I have no idea where she went."
"Don't give me that Changmin. I don't believe it. You KNOW where she~"
"I'm telling you I don't!" Changmin's hushed tone rises as he exclaims a little too loudly but then lowers his voice.
"I noticed you were gone a little while after she left. Then the two of you come back later on together, at the same time~" Jaejoong pieces together the information he's seen.
"I went to go take a walk in the park to clear my head from all this," Changmin truthfully says. "I respect her and I would never follow her." He grips the bottom of his chair, knuckles turning white.
Luckily, Jaejoong doesn't see it.
"By the time I came out of the apartment, she was gone. I went for a walk in the part for some fresh air. You KNOW me hyung, why wouldn't I be speaking the truth?"
Jaejoong pulls back a bit and looks at Changmin through narrowed eyes.
'Because you might be protecting her...' Jaejoong thinks, but shrugs off that thought. He gives Changmin a long, hard stare.
Changmin looks back with an equally serious glare, challenging his hyung but also showing that he is sincere in what he said. His eyes ask Jaejoong to accept the truth as he put it.
And Jaejoong sighs. And says, "Very well, I believe you Changmin."
He sighs again and rests his head in his hands. "It's just- that girl- she- you know how we're all indirectly-"
"I know hyung, I know..." Changmin says quietly. "We worry...we care" he says in an even softer voice, Jaejoong not hearing.
Changmin thinks about Min Ri for a moment- about last night's scene, today's encounter, constantly concerned. His feelings were all a mess by now and he was unsure what he felt.
"Hyung ah..." Changmin says, frowning as he blinked deep in thought.
"Hmmm?"
"I have to ask you a question..." Changmin tries to figure out how to ask his hyung what his mixed feelings are.
"If-" Changmin starts but then suddenly both hear a noise and jolt up. Min RI's standing at the doorway, looking at the two inquisitively with large eyes.
"What are you two talking about?" she asks, noting their hunched over positions, heads close together as if deep in discussion about something.
Jaejoong and Changmin immediately straighten up in their seats, Changmin nervously looking at the tabletop as Jaejoong clears his throat and ruffles the back of his hair with his hand.
"Oh, nothing" Jaejoong smiles that dashing smile that makes every female forget her thoughts. It didn't work on Min Ri though.
"I was just asking Changmin what he felt like eating today and what would taste good..." Jaejoong gets up and busies himself before walking out of the room briskly.
MIn Ri silently looks over at Changmin, who was fumbling with his fingers and darting glances at the table. He quickly glances up and meets Min Ri's eyes and he sees the suspicion written on her face and in her eyes. She gives him a long, hard look, silently judging him before turning around silently and leaving him there alone.
She passes by Jaejoong in the hallway and overhears him saying to Jnsu in a low voice, "Hey Junsu, I want to talk to you about something....shut the door and get the others in here..."
A few mumbles from Junsu within his workroom- "Alright YoungWoongie ah, the others'll come in later, they said they're busy now"- and Jaejoong pokes his head out of the room to close the door.
He catches Min Ri's eyes and nearly trips on the door, but then hides it behind a smile and says, "Ah, forgive me Min Ri ah, I just want to talk privately with Junsu for a minute, okay?" And with a good-natured face, closes the door.
"And later make sure we get Yoochun and Yunho in here. Changmin is alright, he's-"
Min Ri catches this fragment right before the door closes lightly. Again suspicion and curiosity arise in her but she pushes them down as she goes to the living room to work on her laptop.
As the time passes, she notices the door to Junsu's room still hasn't opened. Then, she catches Yoochun, then Yunho quietly shuffling by and lightly knocking on the door, before saying, "Yo what is it? What are you guys talking about?" and being swallowed up into the room.
The four of them were in that one room for a while now...
Min Ri did not notice Changmin anywhere, nor did she particularly care at the moment. She'd been reading the same paragraph over and over at least fifty times, unable to concentrate. Through the window outside, clouds obscured the sky and threatened to downpour any minute. A light drizzle had already started, steadily growing.
'How will I know what choice to make? HOW?' she sighs and looks at the carpeting of the floor before a sudden movement makes her jerk her head up.
Changmin shuffles into the living room quietly in his socks. He passes by the couch but, seeing the questioning, blank look on Min Ri's face, he knew she was probably preoccupied thinking and it would be best if he wasn't there. He stares back at her for a moment before breaking eye contact and shuffling off in the direction of the bedroom.
'Like a deer and a sitting lion...' he thinks, pondering the situation just then. 'But i still get that feeling even by looking at her' he frustratedly runs a hand through his hair as he closes their bedroom door and sits on his bed cross-legged. He continues pondering and wondering over his emotions for her.
'Do I like her? Naaah, there are no butterflies in the stomach, or tingling feeling like they say there should be...but then...what? What should one feel?'
"Arrrrgh" Changmin exclaims as he messes up his hair with both hands, staring at the bedsheets in front of him.
'And it seems the hyungs have forgotten about me, wherever they are' he says to himself, alone in the room. He shrugs though, glad he was alone at the moment so he could think a bit more before asking Jaejoong what these feelings possibly were...
"Min Ri ah, could we talk to you for a second? Just...casually, you know, oppas..." Yunho fumbles.
Min Ri looks up from her laptop, surprised. She didn't hear the four of them get out of the room, didn't hear the door click, the shuffling feet, and now suddenly all four members stood before her sitting form on the couch, in a sort of semi-circle.
"Yes? O-of course!" Min Ri corrects her hesitant, questioning tone to a more casual one.
Jaejoong kneels down to her eye level and takes her hands in his, lightly running his thumbs over the backs of her hands. He looks up to Min Ri's eyes.
"Min Ri ah" he starts. "Um...we just want you to know we're here to help"
"Always here, any time, anywhere" Yunho adds.
"We all think about each other and try to be there" Junsu chirps
"Minus all the mushy sentiments" Yoochun mutters in English, hands crossed over his chest and shifting his weight on one leg, manly aura emanating as he stood there.
Min RI looks from one to the other a little confused, trying to figure out exactly what they were saying.
"What we mean to say is..." Jaejoong moistens his lips by flicking out his tongue for a moment. "Is there anything going on with you right now? Is....is your friend...that girl...Soo Young...alright?"
The startled, wide-eyed look Min Ri gives them is like a deer caught in five full-blown headlights, blocking her escape.
Her mind was blank. She continues staring up at the four of them- by that time Jaejoong stood up in surprise at Min Ri's shocked face- unable to say anything or answer them.
Yoochun tries to break the ice and ask her one more time, in English, "Girl, you okay? We just wanna know if there's anything going on with you that you want us to help...why you acting like this?"
'I can't tell them I can't tell them They shouldn't know They shouldn't know They've got enough to worry about on their minds They shouldn't care I can do this myself why how did they what-' she thinks as another voice breaks her thoughts.
"Hey guys! Guys? What's up? What's going on?" Changmin's finally come out of his little bedroom hideaway, walking forward with his hands in his back pockets, acting like nothing was wrong.
He had finally made up his mind that, mixed feelings or not, he'll ask Min Ri what she thinks of him and then tell her his thoughts and just clear things over between them.
What he didn't plan on was seeing his four hyungs surrounding a sitting Min Ri, in a huddle over her. All of them had surprised faces, the most surprised being Min Ri. He walks closer, the others making room for him so he stood next to Yunho and in between him and Jaejoong.
He looks down at Min Ri as her eyes tremble back up at him.
"You-you told them?" her voice broke as she said it incredulously.
"What?" Changmin's calm\ look is replaced by one of utter confusion. Then the thought finally hit him as it dawned on him.
"No! No i didn't!" he says shocked, shaking his head frantically. He fumbles with his words, "I-I didn't, I swe-"
"I can't believe it" Min RI cuts in. All she needed to hear was his stuttering and that seemed to confirm her suspicions from before. "I can't believe it, you told them didn't you, and not even that much later after we-!"
The other four members look back and forth at the two's dialogue, completely lost, just four pairs of inquiring eyes following everything, soaking up everything, trying to understand and comprehend.
"Min Ri I-" Changmin's eyes plead with her, although he himself towered over her. Min Ri shrinks back, away from him, feeling as if she was being eaten alive.
First by Yunho, Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu, and now by Changmin. What hurt more than the shock of Jaejoong and the others finding out was the fact that Changmin possibly told them- after he promised in the park.
"I trusted you!" she exclaims, looking to the side and closing her eyes. In disgust, she looks back up at his pleading eyes, seeing them turn into shock as she said, "And you betrayed that trust. Never expect to win it back again. Don't talk to me, I don't want to look at you."
With that, she darts off the couch, slipping by between Jaejoong and Changmin.
Just as she lightly brushes by Jaejoong, she pushes against Changmin's shoulder roughly, making him stumble back a few paces. The five of them stand silently as they hear a distant door slam, lock.
The four older men circle their junior, looking at him, startled, as Changmin looks down at the floor, head bent until chin is touching chest, trying to hide his dark, hurt eyes.
"Changmin?" Jaejoong gingerly puts a hand on his shoulder. "Changmin? What's wrong?"
"Uh, what just happened can you tell me?" Junsu tries to ask, but with one abrupt swipe of Jaejoong's hand, Junsu swallows his words.
Jaejoong feels Changmin's shoulder tense under his hand as he suddenly fears Changmin whirling around and striking him or suddenly breaking out and starting to hit anything he could find.
What they all did not expect was to hear a dejected sigh as Changmin shrugs off Jaejoong's hand and say, "Well...that takes care of that. That's it I guess. All hope's gone..."
And the poor guy shuffles away, the four of them looking at his retreating figure walking towards the bedroom.
"Now how will I tell her?" they hear him mumble.
"Is it just me, or is everyone else as confused as I am?" Yunho blinks, face worried
-Back in the bedroom-
Listen to this song now, starting at 1.30
Changmin walks back in and shuts the door, leaning heavily against the solid wood. He looks around at the room, moments ago which he left in a happy state making up his mind to tell Min Ri his many mixed up thoughts. Now that same room becomes a dark, gloomy sanctuary at this sudden turn of events.
He walks over to his bed and sits on it, back facing the windows behind him. Despite it being cold and windy outside, he completely opens the window right next to his bed and leans against the glass, letting the wind drift in from his right, chilling his heart.
The guys by now had sat on the couch, some on the couch, others on the floor, trying to piece together what happened.
"As far as it seems, Min Ri is troubled by Soo Young" Yunho concludes.
"But she won't tell us why" Yoochun
"Seems she did tell Changmin, although when I asked him, he denied everything" Jaejoong says
"Of course, because Min Ri told him in strictest confidence" Junsu says as-a-matter-of-fact.
" 'Confidence'?" Yoochun asks
"Trusting he'd not tell anyone else" Yunho
Jaejoong sighs. "I wonder if I went too far that time...before, Min Ri saw the two of us talking. I guess that's why?" he stands up.
"Maybe I should go to her and explain that Changmin wasn't a part of whatever it was she thinks; it isn't his to blame."
Junsu grabs Jaejoong's wrist. "No, wait, don't do that; that'll only seem to strengthen the belief that Changmin did have a part in this."
Jaejoogn stills, then with a sigh sits back down, head in his hands.
"What are we going to do? With these two maknaes..."
Yunho puts a hand on his shoulder, shaking him slightly saying, "It's alright....time will solve everything."
"That's right..." Yoochun says. "We'll give the two some time alone for now, then apologize to Min Ri and explain we were just concerned."
"Sounds like a good idea" Junsu nods.
They all stay within the living room for a while. Pretty soon though, one of them starts fidgeting. Didn't take long for him to speak up.
"So....what do we do now?" Yoochun stands up.
The others look at him coldly.
He sits back down. "Oh.....right...alone time for them..." He fidgets for a moment more before getting up and saying, "But I just can't stand seeing Changmin that hurt...I'm going..."
Yoochun gets up and walks to the bedroom, lightly closing the door behind him, the other three not saying a word and merely following his movements with their eyes.
Pairings: Changmin/fc with hints of yunjae and yoosu
Rating: G
Genre: Drama, Real life, General
Length: Chapters
Summary: It all started with a coincidence. One accident, one helping hand, one small step. And soon it leads to so much more. . .
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~CHAPTER 23~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It’s the fourth week of the month. November is drawing to a close. Min Ri’s establishment in the house has long been used to and almost familiar, at least for the guys.
But in the back of her mind, no matter how she goes through her days smiling and laughing, the thought looms in her head. And gets heavier with each visit- inhaling the hospital scent, grasping the hand that seems to feel a bit colder day by day, looking at those eyes that should have opened long ago.
“Oh Soo Young…what’s taking so long? Is it the medication? The procedure? Why aren’t you awake yet?”
As she sighs and lowers her head after saying this, a doctor comes in, knocking on the door gently.
“Excuse me miss,” he clears his throat. Min RI looks up and turns, nodding to the doctor.
“Yes, doctor?”
“All tests we’ve run routinely each week yield no results. No improvement, no change.”
“Then~” Min Ri blinks her eyes, mind still not registering what the doctor meant. “I don’t understand, what are you trying to say?”
“In these cases, the longer the time drags on, the less likely for the patient to be cured or to wake up” -the doctor continues despite Min RI’s eyes widening to their full extent- “And it has already been a month. All has been done so I’m afraid now all that is left is the choice~”
“Wait a minute, no no, please, wait…” Min Ri cuts in, not wanting to hear the following words.
The doctor blinks and then responds in a dry kind of way, “Yes?” Obviously he’s never been talked to like that before.
Min Ri licks her lips to moisten them and gain time.
“No… nothing can be done?”
Her mind comes up with no suggestions, no solutions. The doctor shakes his head.
“None whatsoever. We’ve done all that we could. The rest is up to you.”
He puts a hand on Min Ri’s shoulder. “The most we can do is keep her on the system for another week at most. But you or her family have to make the choice to either keep her on, or take her off. But let me say that chances are dim, no matter how long you keep her on the support. You’re only hurting her and yourself more.”
He looks sadly at Min Ri. “I’m sorry.”
'Sorry? He says sorry? He’s already acting like Soo Young’s gone! But she’s right here!' Min Ri tightly grasps Soo Young’s hand, expecting to feel a light squeeze in return. But the hand lays limply in her own.
She sighs and looks down at the floor, unmoving.
“Do you have the contact information of her family?” Min Ri slowly shakes her heavy head.
“No…” she takes a deep breath. “As far as I know, as far as she’s told me, she has no family. She’s…” Min Ri breaks off, suddenly a lump in her throat started forming.
“I see…” the doctor says. “Then, I know this is a difficult situation for you, taking responsibility of your friend’s life in your hands, but sometime this week, please inform the hospital of the decision. Or see me when you are ready. My office is just down the hall.”
The doctor continues, trying to help this youngster in front of him as much as he possibly can. “If you two ever had, in your conversations, discussed something like this, do you remember your friend ever telling you her opinion about being in this physical state? If she did, or if you two ever mentioned this subject and discussed it seriously for whatever reason, then that is as good a consent as her family’s- even better, since the declaration came from herself.” The doctor stops, trying to let it all sink in.
In a lower tone, he says, “Go home for the day. I know it must be painful, but try to think.” He smiles a bit to Min Ri and bows before walking out of the room.
'Think back…' Min Ri repeats, her eyes staring off into the long corridor, following the doctor’s leave.
“Think back…” Min RI repeats to herself, curled up into a ball on the couch with her knees drawn to her chest, staring over at the blank tv screen in front of her.
“Think back what?” Yunho says, plopping down next to her and peering at her curiously.
Min Ri sighs, shaking her head and trying to throw off the stupor she was in. The last thing she wants if for the others to find out, be dragged into this, and let this affect them, all because of her. No, this was her burden, so she alone will carry the weight.
“Nothing Yunho oppa, nothing…”
Yunho arches an eyebrow, sticking out his lower lip. “Are you sure it’s nothing?”
She offers a small smile and attempts to slightly divert the question. “Have you ever seen this movie? I don’t remember the title, but the story was kinda like helping out a friend. And I was thinking, if you had a friend in trouble~”
Yunho pulls his legs up on the couch and turns his body towards Min Ri, leaning over slightly, listening intently. Helping others in need was his specialty, especially any friend.
“Would you do what your friend begs you to do in that situation or what you think is the best option? And which would be considered the best and not selfish?”
Ooh, that’s a tough question. Yunho bites his lip, pouting in concentration. He scratches his head thoughtfully and clutches the couch pillow in front of him.
“I guess I’d have to say I’d respect my friend’s decision and do what they wish in that circumstance. Except~” here he interjects sharply, “only after doing my best to make my thought work and exhausting all other possibilities. Only after I fight long and hard for my best actions will I turn to what my friend suggested.”
Min Ri sighs heavily. Yunho peers down at her.
“Did that help at all?” he asks. She glances at him and gives him a small smile.
“Yes, it did help Yunho~ Thank you”
He beams as he says “No problem” and bounces up from the couch, strethching his arms above his head, loudly declaring, “Ahhh I’m hungry! Hey Jaejoong! Any food to eat?”
followed by Jaejoong’s “It’s not dinner time yet, have patience!!!”
. . . . Soo Young did tell her what she wanted to happen in that situation.
Min Ri was lying face up on the couch, unable to fall asleep, rethinking the possibilities over and over. She still remembers that memory vividly- the two of them were at a café a couple years ago, discussing some things about life- college, jobs, families, the like.
Among the things they talked about was the choice of respect for a friend.
I “f I was ever trapped in a situation where I couldn’t live- couldn’t breathe, couldn’t eat, couldn’t see the sunlight~” Soo Young said, sitting across from Min Ri at the little table, looking out at the scenery and stirring her tea with a spoon, “I would rather die.”
She tears her eyes away from the sunshine spreading its warmth outside to look into Min Ri’s surprised eyes with her own serious ones.
“I would rather die, plain and simple. I’d rather be removed from that half-life.”
Min Ri arched her eyebrow and half smiled, trying to lighten the mood and get her friend back to her cheery usual self, saying, “Aren’t you being a little macabre though? There’s always room for hope-”
“No. Not in that case…even with the slim chance of hope, I wouldn’t change my choice. Because after that ordeal, how would you enjoy life again, constantly haunted by that memory of what you went through. It’s a sleep-like death, a half-life.”
At that, Min RI felt silent, brooding over her own opinion on the matter- which was to cling on to the last possible hope until the end, to see if there would be a turn of events. But that’d situation would never happen to them, she thought, as she turn and smiled to Soo Young, who grinned back and started another topic of conversation.
That’d never happen to anyone. . .
She didn’t realize she had been crying. Now, as she was lying there on the couch, staring up at the ceiling, she felt her damp cheek, a tear already working its way down her face.
“Thank god… Changmin is not here tonight…” she says in a shaky voice, the softness of her tone carrying on through the darkness of the room. A sob racks her body out of nowhere.
“I don’t think I could take it if he did come…” and with that her hands cover her face as she silently lets her tears and frustrations out, only the occasional sniffle or gasp heard.
Farther away, hidden by the darkness in the hall, Changmin stands silently in the corridor, back against the wall, head down, listening. His eyes narrow and his hand tightens into a fist at what he hears, his arm shaking from the exertion until he lets out a frustrated sigh and loosens his hand, tilting his head in the direction of the living room, hearing her sobs and yearning to go over as he always did and comfort her the way his mother comforted him.
Jaejoong may be in charge of comforting everyone in general, but only he knew these secret cries to sleep, the secret sadness hidden by the night. And this time, she shuns his help. He himself heard it clearly said- she didn’t want him at that moment and wanted him gone. And that’s what angered him- more than his curiosity over what upset her so much- that she never once sought out his help, but lay there alone, never getting up and dragging him out of bed which he gladly would have done- but lying there until by chance he came to her.
He wasn’t a psychic. He didn’t always know when she was hurting, didn’t always wake up each night to go and check on her. There was only so much that he could do. As he turns his back and walks heavily to the bedroom, he hears Min Ri softly exclaim, “How am I ever going to make this decision?”
He halts in his steps for a moment, then resumes them into the bedroom.
'I will find out more about this ‘choice’ she has to make. And she will tell me' he thinks as he closes the door and settles back in his bed.
Far away in the living room, Min Ri hasn’t heard at all the intrusion she feared. “Soo Young…” she sighs. “Soo Young…” feeling herself slipping away slowly as she loses consciousness.
“Good morning!” Min Ri greets as she settles herself in the chair, doing her best and smiling at the others around the table.
“Rise and shine!” Jaejoog chirps happily, as he grins at his success in flipping a pancake for the first time and able to still keep it within the pot.
“Well, look who finally woke up!” Yunho grins as he then turns over and continues talking to Yoochun about something. Yoochun sleepily nods a hello to Min Ri, a Cheshire cat smile spreading across his face for her before it’s finally overridden by a large yawn.
Junsu’s eyes sparkle as he beams at Min Ri, bright as the morning sun, which was forming a halo around his hair. He already had his knife and fork in hand, waiting to start eating. Changmin glowers at Min RI, scrutinizing her facial expressions as she greeted the others that morning.
'So she masks it all behind a smile…she’s even fooled her eyes into smiling…' he thinks as she reaches over for a slice of bread.
His glower quickly dissipates as he sees Min Ri turn over to him and gingerly nods a ‘good morning’ to him. He silently nods back, trying at a half-smile with one corner of his mouth curled up.
'I shouldn’t openly confront her about it, she might not take it well… best watch what she does for the day ' And so Changmin’s plan acting as a spy starts.
-Later-
The morning yielded no pleasing results for Changmin, but by midday his efforts were fulfilled.
“Guys, I’m going out for a while, is that okay?”
“Okay!” a chorus comes from the different study rooms to meet her.
'These past few days she has been routinely leaving to go somewhere…' Changmin notes. 'For about the past week, in fact.'
“Would you like me to go with you?” Changmin creeps up behind Min Ri and asks her, startling her as she was putting on her coat.
“Oh Changmin…” she whirls around and puts a hand over her heart.
“Would you like me to accompany you?” Changmin tries to take the coldness out of the question and smiles slightly to soften his tone.
Min Ri stares at him- his mouth hay have been smiling but his eyes took a while to soften as his smile did.
“N-no it’s alright. I’ll be back in a while so don’t worry!”
“Alright” Changmin says, knowing better than to push it. He waits until she leaves, counts to a minute slowly, and takes his own jacket and follows her. Hands buried deep into the pockets of his trench coat, he hunches deeper into the collar of his coat, letting the scarf warm his mouth and lips as his breaths puff out into clouds of air. It was cold, but his eyes were sharp and locked onto her figure in the distance and stayed there.
He saw her hail a cab and took one himself, merely telling the driver to follow the other car. The driver gave a quizzical, questioning look, about to ask, “Is this a joke? Am I on a detective movie or a candid camera set?” but one glance through the rear view mirror at Changmin’s dark eyes silenced any questions in him. He follows the cab to its destination. Getting out of the cab he has just enough time to catch Min Ri walking through the front doors of the hospital.
'So this is where she’s going each day!' Changmin thinks, his curiosity finally satiated.
He contemplates the idea of walking in and then confronting her about it, but he knows she’ll take it badly. So, he contents himself with hopping onto the bus and heading back to the park near their apartment. As he slowly walks around, looking at the scenery, he lets his thought take over.
'Why has she been visiting her friend more often lately? Why hasn’t she told us where she goes and, more importantly, why is she smiling more and more, acting like nothing’s wrong? Why hasn’t she asked us to go with her or help? What would that choice that she was talking about mean? Last night was certainly alarming>>
He sighs and sits down on a bench, resting his chin on his hands. He remains deep in thought until he subconsciously checks his watch.
“Oh it’s been half an hour already. She must be on her way back then…” Changmin murmurs, straightening his back and stretching on the bench. He looks down the pathway and sees a familiar figure approaching him.
Min Ri always asks the cab driver to drop her off directly in front of the apartment- or at least at the mart one block away so she could go buy groceries and make it look like that's where she was. But today she felt she had to walk a bit to let her mind free for a while. The part beckoned to her and invited her to come for a stroll, so on her way back she motions to the driver to stop there, one block short of her destination.
As she walks through the park at her own pace, she sighs and feel the branches rustle overhead in response.
“What am I going to do? What am I going to do?” she constantly repeats.
“No change again today, no improvement. Never responds to what I say, never responds to what I plead, when I hold her hand, when I shake her. I really don’t want this anymore…”
All thoughts clouding her mind, even the faces of the guys, each are slowly pushed out until they are all replaced by Soo Young’s face and the one question that arises from it all.
“. . .What should I do?” Min Ri halts in the middle of the walkway, looking up at the sky. Of course, there is no answer as the clouds merely roll on overhead, the wind gently blowing.
She sighs and bends her head over, slowly starting to walk again. “I shouldn’t be that far from the apartment now I guess…” she muses to herself.
With effort, she lifts her head up to the path in front of her, following the rows of benches on each side until they converge to a point in the distance. She follows the path of benches with her eyes back down, until a tall, dark figure disrupts the pattern of the benches.
A tall, dark figure standing, looking in her direction. A slightly familiar figure. . .
As she gets closer she finally sees his face. With a surprised gasp of “Changmin!” she makes it known he was the last person she expected to see, and by far the most dreaded.
He says nothing, but his eyes conveyed everything. He parted his lips as if to speak but she beat him to it.
“Changmin!” she repeats.
“Why are………aren’t you cold?” she settles for a less harmful question instead of asking him why he was there, for fear he might redirect the question to her.
Which is exactly what he noticed and did.
“Where did you go?” he said coldly. But before giving time to Min Ri to answer or even think about it he says, “And don’t bother coming up with excuses or explanations.”
Min Ri moistens her lips. Changmin’s eyes follow that motion. She darts a glance at him. His eyes still unwaver on her own.
“I was…I was…” she sighs. She risks another glance up at him.
If it was any other member, she could fool them, but with Changmin there’s no way of getting past him. Besides, she’d might as well admit it now quickly in one breath and get it over with, rather than having to sort out an entire complex mess later on.
“I was at the hospital,” she sighs.
He nods. “I saw you there” he admits, ignoring her shocked face.
Since she finally admitted the truth to him, he had better tell the truth as well, this way they’re both on the same level.
“But what were you doing at the hospital?” he inquires, eyes boring into hers.
She fumbles and looks down at the ground. “You know…just…visiting Soo Young.”
The answer doesn’t satisfy him.
“I’ll wait,” he says. “I’ve got all day if I have to.”
A gust of cold wind suddenly blows. Min Ri flinches, looking up at him as he stood to his full height. He was using it as an advantage, looking down at her. She knows it isn’t curiosity that goads him on, but then what was it? Was it genuine concern for Soo Young or fate trying to make her life hell at the moment?
She sighs and looks over at the benches, blocks of wood without heart, feelings, as Changmin says, “Let’s sit.”
She walks over and sits heavily, hands deep in her pockets, hiding her mouth into her scarf, staring at the ground in front of her. Changmin sits right next to her, his leg touching hers, leaving no room between them as if indicating that he’d press her to the end to get her to confide in him.
“Well, it’s Soo Young. Her condition…” and just like that, Min RI little by little tells him the story, as he silently listens, soaking everything in.
“So you see…” she finishes breathless, leaving a cloud of air float out before her. “I’m in this predicament. This serious dilemma, and I don’t want~”
“I know, I know.” Changmin says. “You don’t want to lose your friend. But you don’t want to make this decision.”
He sighs, feeling a huge migraine coming on from all that she told him. Who knew this was what she was hiding.
“But you know…sometimes life purposefully deals us these cards, as if to test our morals. It’s like a challenge to see how much you can take.”
“Well, I’m up to, if not past my breaking point in life and I don’t want anymore of this.”
He lays a hand on her shoulder. “All I can say is, have strength. Have patience. The answer will come to you when you are ready for it.”
She sighs. Telling him what was bothering her did little to lift the burden still weighing down on her.
“But promise me this…”
“Mmm?” Changmin softly says, bending over closely to hear her words.
“Don’t tell the others. Swear upon this. Or…or I’ll never forgive you, nor talk to you again.” She looks at him with her most serious face.
Changmin was stumped, since he was considering telling his hyungs. After all, they were more experienced and have gone through more ordeals than he has. But of course, respecting Min Ri's plead, he nods a "yes" and wraps one arm around her, standing up and saying, "Come on, let's go home."
Min Ri forces down a swallow and nods. "Yeah...let's go h-ho.....let's go back..."
"Min Ri ah, welcome back! You too Changmin!" Jaejoong appears at the door, beaming in his apron as he ushers the two of them inside and takes off Min Ri's coat and hangs it up for her.
Min RI and Changmin exchange curious looks.
"How did you know we were coming hyung?" changmin asks
"Oh, I heard footsteps in the hallway and the front door clicking" Jaejoong calmly says
"You usually don't help with our coats" Changmin notes
"Nonsense, why wouldn't I? I'm in a cleaning mood and besides, it's nice to do a little act of kindness each day!" Jaejoong pouts.
"That's not kindness that's trying to act chivalrous in front of a lady!" Changmin points out.
Min Ri lets out a laugh. "I'll get going then you two..." she says as she slips past the two of them quickly.
"I'll go see if there's any laundry to wash or collect first!"
The two nod, Jaejoong smiling as Min Ri walks away, but just as Changmin makes to walk off as well, in the direction of the bedroom, Jaejoong grabs him by the elbow.
"Wait. I want to talk to you." Changmin turns around incredulously and sees Jaejoong's moments ago happy face change to one of utmost seriousness.
He leads Changmin to the kitchen table and the two of them sit down, close together. Jaejoong leans in closely to Changmin, his head bent down, as Changmin looks at him surprised, leaning back against his chair as far away from Jaejoong as possible, wondering why all the closeness and secrecy.
"I know you probably know more about Min Ri than the rest of us" Jaejoong starts.
Changmin opens his mouth to retaliate out of surprise but Jaejoong holds up a hand.
"Be it your same age or whatever, I just want to know one thing. As I was hanging up her coat, I caught the faint smell of sanitizer, the kind of strong, sharp smell only found in hospitals. So tell me~" Jaejoong looks at Changmin with dark, piercing eyes, their heads almost touching, his serious face still there. "Was she at the hospital or not?"
CHangmin was momentarily shocked, his mouth agape as he stared at his hyung. He never thought Jaejoong would catch up this quickly, merely a little while after he HIMSELF confronted Min Ri about this at the part.
"Well, was she at the hospital or not? The others are worried as well"
'Especially Yunho, who was telling me she was asking him something strange yesterday' Jaejoong thinks
Changmin looks back at Jaejoong seeing the concern in the other's eyes. He remembers his promise to Min Ri, inwardly sighs, and says, "Hyung. I'm very sorry. I have no idea where she went."
"Don't give me that Changmin. I don't believe it. You KNOW where she~"
"I'm telling you I don't!" Changmin's hushed tone rises as he exclaims a little too loudly but then lowers his voice.
"I noticed you were gone a little while after she left. Then the two of you come back later on together, at the same time~" Jaejoong pieces together the information he's seen.
"I went to go take a walk in the park to clear my head from all this," Changmin truthfully says. "I respect her and I would never follow her." He grips the bottom of his chair, knuckles turning white.
Luckily, Jaejoong doesn't see it.
"By the time I came out of the apartment, she was gone. I went for a walk in the part for some fresh air. You KNOW me hyung, why wouldn't I be speaking the truth?"
Jaejoong pulls back a bit and looks at Changmin through narrowed eyes.
'Because you might be protecting her...' Jaejoong thinks, but shrugs off that thought. He gives Changmin a long, hard stare.
Changmin looks back with an equally serious glare, challenging his hyung but also showing that he is sincere in what he said. His eyes ask Jaejoong to accept the truth as he put it.
And Jaejoong sighs. And says, "Very well, I believe you Changmin."
He sighs again and rests his head in his hands. "It's just- that girl- she- you know how we're all indirectly-"
"I know hyung, I know..." Changmin says quietly. "We worry...we care" he says in an even softer voice, Jaejoong not hearing.
Changmin thinks about Min Ri for a moment- about last night's scene, today's encounter, constantly concerned. His feelings were all a mess by now and he was unsure what he felt.
"Hyung ah..." Changmin says, frowning as he blinked deep in thought.
"Hmmm?"
"I have to ask you a question..." Changmin tries to figure out how to ask his hyung what his mixed feelings are.
"If-" Changmin starts but then suddenly both hear a noise and jolt up. Min RI's standing at the doorway, looking at the two inquisitively with large eyes.
"What are you two talking about?" she asks, noting their hunched over positions, heads close together as if deep in discussion about something.
Jaejoong and Changmin immediately straighten up in their seats, Changmin nervously looking at the tabletop as Jaejoong clears his throat and ruffles the back of his hair with his hand.
"Oh, nothing" Jaejoong smiles that dashing smile that makes every female forget her thoughts. It didn't work on Min Ri though.
"I was just asking Changmin what he felt like eating today and what would taste good..." Jaejoong gets up and busies himself before walking out of the room briskly.
MIn Ri silently looks over at Changmin, who was fumbling with his fingers and darting glances at the table. He quickly glances up and meets Min Ri's eyes and he sees the suspicion written on her face and in her eyes. She gives him a long, hard look, silently judging him before turning around silently and leaving him there alone.
She passes by Jaejoong in the hallway and overhears him saying to Jnsu in a low voice, "Hey Junsu, I want to talk to you about something....shut the door and get the others in here..."
A few mumbles from Junsu within his workroom- "Alright YoungWoongie ah, the others'll come in later, they said they're busy now"- and Jaejoong pokes his head out of the room to close the door.
He catches Min Ri's eyes and nearly trips on the door, but then hides it behind a smile and says, "Ah, forgive me Min Ri ah, I just want to talk privately with Junsu for a minute, okay?" And with a good-natured face, closes the door.
"And later make sure we get Yoochun and Yunho in here. Changmin is alright, he's-"
Min Ri catches this fragment right before the door closes lightly. Again suspicion and curiosity arise in her but she pushes them down as she goes to the living room to work on her laptop.
As the time passes, she notices the door to Junsu's room still hasn't opened. Then, she catches Yoochun, then Yunho quietly shuffling by and lightly knocking on the door, before saying, "Yo what is it? What are you guys talking about?" and being swallowed up into the room.
The four of them were in that one room for a while now...
Min Ri did not notice Changmin anywhere, nor did she particularly care at the moment. She'd been reading the same paragraph over and over at least fifty times, unable to concentrate. Through the window outside, clouds obscured the sky and threatened to downpour any minute. A light drizzle had already started, steadily growing.
'How will I know what choice to make? HOW?' she sighs and looks at the carpeting of the floor before a sudden movement makes her jerk her head up.
Changmin shuffles into the living room quietly in his socks. He passes by the couch but, seeing the questioning, blank look on Min Ri's face, he knew she was probably preoccupied thinking and it would be best if he wasn't there. He stares back at her for a moment before breaking eye contact and shuffling off in the direction of the bedroom.
'Like a deer and a sitting lion...' he thinks, pondering the situation just then. 'But i still get that feeling even by looking at her' he frustratedly runs a hand through his hair as he closes their bedroom door and sits on his bed cross-legged. He continues pondering and wondering over his emotions for her.
'Do I like her? Naaah, there are no butterflies in the stomach, or tingling feeling like they say there should be...but then...what? What should one feel?'
"Arrrrgh" Changmin exclaims as he messes up his hair with both hands, staring at the bedsheets in front of him.
'And it seems the hyungs have forgotten about me, wherever they are' he says to himself, alone in the room. He shrugs though, glad he was alone at the moment so he could think a bit more before asking Jaejoong what these feelings possibly were...
"Min Ri ah, could we talk to you for a second? Just...casually, you know, oppas..." Yunho fumbles.
Min Ri looks up from her laptop, surprised. She didn't hear the four of them get out of the room, didn't hear the door click, the shuffling feet, and now suddenly all four members stood before her sitting form on the couch, in a sort of semi-circle.
"Yes? O-of course!" Min Ri corrects her hesitant, questioning tone to a more casual one.
Jaejoong kneels down to her eye level and takes her hands in his, lightly running his thumbs over the backs of her hands. He looks up to Min Ri's eyes.
"Min Ri ah" he starts. "Um...we just want you to know we're here to help"
"Always here, any time, anywhere" Yunho adds.
"We all think about each other and try to be there" Junsu chirps
"Minus all the mushy sentiments" Yoochun mutters in English, hands crossed over his chest and shifting his weight on one leg, manly aura emanating as he stood there.
Min RI looks from one to the other a little confused, trying to figure out exactly what they were saying.
"What we mean to say is..." Jaejoong moistens his lips by flicking out his tongue for a moment. "Is there anything going on with you right now? Is....is your friend...that girl...Soo Young...alright?"
The startled, wide-eyed look Min Ri gives them is like a deer caught in five full-blown headlights, blocking her escape.
Her mind was blank. She continues staring up at the four of them- by that time Jaejoong stood up in surprise at Min Ri's shocked face- unable to say anything or answer them.
Yoochun tries to break the ice and ask her one more time, in English, "Girl, you okay? We just wanna know if there's anything going on with you that you want us to help...why you acting like this?"
'I can't tell them I can't tell them They shouldn't know They shouldn't know They've got enough to worry about on their minds They shouldn't care I can do this myself why how did they what-' she thinks as another voice breaks her thoughts.
"Hey guys! Guys? What's up? What's going on?" Changmin's finally come out of his little bedroom hideaway, walking forward with his hands in his back pockets, acting like nothing was wrong.
He had finally made up his mind that, mixed feelings or not, he'll ask Min Ri what she thinks of him and then tell her his thoughts and just clear things over between them.
What he didn't plan on was seeing his four hyungs surrounding a sitting Min Ri, in a huddle over her. All of them had surprised faces, the most surprised being Min Ri. He walks closer, the others making room for him so he stood next to Yunho and in between him and Jaejoong.
He looks down at Min Ri as her eyes tremble back up at him.
"You-you told them?" her voice broke as she said it incredulously.
"What?" Changmin's calm\ look is replaced by one of utter confusion. Then the thought finally hit him as it dawned on him.
"No! No i didn't!" he says shocked, shaking his head frantically. He fumbles with his words, "I-I didn't, I swe-"
"I can't believe it" Min RI cuts in. All she needed to hear was his stuttering and that seemed to confirm her suspicions from before. "I can't believe it, you told them didn't you, and not even that much later after we-!"
The other four members look back and forth at the two's dialogue, completely lost, just four pairs of inquiring eyes following everything, soaking up everything, trying to understand and comprehend.
"Min Ri I-" Changmin's eyes plead with her, although he himself towered over her. Min Ri shrinks back, away from him, feeling as if she was being eaten alive.
First by Yunho, Jaejoong, Yoochun and Junsu, and now by Changmin. What hurt more than the shock of Jaejoong and the others finding out was the fact that Changmin possibly told them- after he promised in the park.
"I trusted you!" she exclaims, looking to the side and closing her eyes. In disgust, she looks back up at his pleading eyes, seeing them turn into shock as she said, "And you betrayed that trust. Never expect to win it back again. Don't talk to me, I don't want to look at you."
With that, she darts off the couch, slipping by between Jaejoong and Changmin.
Just as she lightly brushes by Jaejoong, she pushes against Changmin's shoulder roughly, making him stumble back a few paces. The five of them stand silently as they hear a distant door slam, lock.
The four older men circle their junior, looking at him, startled, as Changmin looks down at the floor, head bent until chin is touching chest, trying to hide his dark, hurt eyes.
"Changmin?" Jaejoong gingerly puts a hand on his shoulder. "Changmin? What's wrong?"
"Uh, what just happened can you tell me?" Junsu tries to ask, but with one abrupt swipe of Jaejoong's hand, Junsu swallows his words.
Jaejoong feels Changmin's shoulder tense under his hand as he suddenly fears Changmin whirling around and striking him or suddenly breaking out and starting to hit anything he could find.
What they all did not expect was to hear a dejected sigh as Changmin shrugs off Jaejoong's hand and say, "Well...that takes care of that. That's it I guess. All hope's gone..."
And the poor guy shuffles away, the four of them looking at his retreating figure walking towards the bedroom.
"Now how will I tell her?" they hear him mumble.
"Is it just me, or is everyone else as confused as I am?" Yunho blinks, face worried
-Back in the bedroom-
Listen to this song now, starting at 1.30
Changmin walks back in and shuts the door, leaning heavily against the solid wood. He looks around at the room, moments ago which he left in a happy state making up his mind to tell Min Ri his many mixed up thoughts. Now that same room becomes a dark, gloomy sanctuary at this sudden turn of events.
He walks over to his bed and sits on it, back facing the windows behind him. Despite it being cold and windy outside, he completely opens the window right next to his bed and leans against the glass, letting the wind drift in from his right, chilling his heart.
The guys by now had sat on the couch, some on the couch, others on the floor, trying to piece together what happened.
"As far as it seems, Min Ri is troubled by Soo Young" Yunho concludes.
"But she won't tell us why" Yoochun
"Seems she did tell Changmin, although when I asked him, he denied everything" Jaejoong says
"Of course, because Min Ri told him in strictest confidence" Junsu says as-a-matter-of-fact.
" 'Confidence'?" Yoochun asks
"Trusting he'd not tell anyone else" Yunho
Jaejoong sighs. "I wonder if I went too far that time...before, Min Ri saw the two of us talking. I guess that's why?" he stands up.
"Maybe I should go to her and explain that Changmin wasn't a part of whatever it was she thinks; it isn't his to blame."
Junsu grabs Jaejoong's wrist. "No, wait, don't do that; that'll only seem to strengthen the belief that Changmin did have a part in this."
Jaejoogn stills, then with a sigh sits back down, head in his hands.
"What are we going to do? With these two maknaes..."
Yunho puts a hand on his shoulder, shaking him slightly saying, "It's alright....time will solve everything."
"That's right..." Yoochun says. "We'll give the two some time alone for now, then apologize to Min Ri and explain we were just concerned."
"Sounds like a good idea" Junsu nods.
They all stay within the living room for a while. Pretty soon though, one of them starts fidgeting. Didn't take long for him to speak up.
"So....what do we do now?" Yoochun stands up.
The others look at him coldly.
He sits back down. "Oh.....right...alone time for them..." He fidgets for a moment more before getting up and saying, "But I just can't stand seeing Changmin that hurt...I'm going..."
Yoochun gets up and walks to the bedroom, lightly closing the door behind him, the other three not saying a word and merely following his movements with their eyes.