On My Own

[mintenergy]

 Got my own place for the first time in my whole life. I thought living alone would be...different

Comments

[enots]

But trust me, it will get better. And you will be glad you went through it. Debt is only temporary. Heck, debt is probably the biggest rite of passage into adulthood.

[mintenergy]

Now this is what I needed to hear. Thank you :)
I think the debt thing only bothers me because my folks don't even believe in credit so I was raised that way, and I'm the credit queen now. It just feels a little overwhelming.

[enots]

My parents are exactly the same. "Don't get a credit card." "Dont borrow money." Well fine, but everyone else in the world does! I understand the fear. But I figure that making money into a problem: worrying about it constantly, turning it into something fearful, only brings more troubles. I know this friend, she always whinges and complains about not having any money and so money problems follow her around. Plus I know for a fact that the reason she "doesn't have any money" is because she's got a huge mortgage. I said to her one day, how about instead of saying you've got no money, you say you're paying off a house (and you are lucky)? She didn't quite understand.

Sorry for the rant! Debt is annoying, but its also the thing that enables you to do things. And you're a smart cookie, you'll be fine.

Can you get a pet?

[mintenergy]

Yeah, they hate when I use my credit card for stuff. And they always seem to find out... "Did you put that on credit" Cue the disapproving eyes.

Thanks for the advice. I know I'll pay the debt off, I can handle it. It just kills me that I still need SO much more and yet I've already spent a fortune. Sometimes I wish I'd been born in a cheaper era or something LOL

I want a dog very badly, but it would have to be alone all day while I'm at work, plus it would be so expensive. I'm considering it though.

[eugis]

I'm happy that you've got your own place (I cannot tell you how much I want that) but I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. I'm sure it will pass soon. Debt will go away and you'll see that you've made the right decision. In the meantime, have a giant bear hug. I wish I could do more for you.

*HUGS*

[mintenergy]

That makes me feel better, thanks Euge <3
I know I'll pay off the debt, I always do. I just hate how expensive it is to live these days. I can't afford myself! LOL

[eugis]

It's almost impossible to afford rent and basic stuff on an average wage. That's why I'll marry a prince. lol Nah, seriously, I wish things weren't so expensive. And it's not like I lead a luxurious life! This is one of the things I don't like of being an adult.

[mintenergy]

It really is next to impossible. No wonder we're all in debt. The cost of living is much, much too high. I want to marry a rich man, too! You know you're getting older when financial security inches to the top of the list over things like "great personality" and "good looks" LOL

FWIW, I don't live a luxurious life either. I am very, very low maintenance. I don't know how people do it.

[callmeonetrack]

Oh I've been there. When I was offered my first real adult, post-college job, in New York--a far-flung big city that I would have to move to and knew exactly no one who lived there, I accepted the job then hung up the phone and promptly burst into tears. (Which I almost never do!) I wasn't even sure if they were happy or sad tears. It was what I wanted most but the worry was overwhelming. I'm happy to say thought that it did indeed work out

[mintenergy]

Now I feel silly. I can't even imagine going somewhere as intimidating as New York.

That is excellent advice on the credit, thank you so much! Also, I had no idea about the debt thing and that it was good to carry a small amount. I feel a lot better about that now.

It does seem scary but I think everyone's right and I just need to give it time.

[ecstaticdance]

That first night in your first place by yourself is so hard.

And dude, if every rite of passage we had as adults was celebrated and built up the way these rites of passage are in movies, they probably would be much cooler. We have a bad habit of not honoring or respecting the stress and challenge that goes with life changes. Seriously. Make a big deal of it. Light a candle, burn some sage, float a wildflower in a bowl of water, play your music way too loud, wander the rooms and claim them as your own.

It gets easier.

And I hear you on the debt. Though I think Enots is right. Single biggest rite of passage into modern adulthood. :-/

[mintenergy]

Light a candle, burn some sage, float a wildflower in a bowl of water, play your music way too loud, wander the rooms and claim them as your own.

Ok, it's official. I want to do all of these things tomorrow!

Thank you for the support and excellent insight <3

[baciami2]

Sweetie! It will get easier. Both the being alone and the debt. You will be so grateful for your freedom. Invite some friends over to warm the place up fully by filling with great conversation, your favorite music, yummy food, and some great alcohol...then let it rip. The sooner you start making happy memories in your new place, the sooner you'll begin cherishing all that offers imho.

[mintenergy]

Thank you so much! Those are excellent suggestions <3