Challenge Response: Nanofiction

[cotidiana]

They’d done this repair job a googolplex times before. Yolanda inserted her cuprate hand into the circuitry; Gloria inserted her liquid nitrogen one. Current should have begun flowing again. Bzzst! Yolanda yanked them both from the electrical flame’s way. On the floor, in each other’s arms for the first time, they saw more sparks flying.

Comments

[laudomia]

Android femmeslash--very creative.

[cotidiana]

Thank you!

[redvelvetcanopy]

Very interesting! I love the way you mix the tech with the romance.

Excellent title too!

[cotidiana]

Thanks. I've never done sci fi or romance before, so I'm experimenting. Thanks for this forum to do so.

[redvelvetcanopy]

Feel free to add an author's note whenever you'd want asking for specific comments on how something experimental comes across. Yes, this is for generating as much flash as possible, but it's also for critique and bettering one's skills.

[cotidiana]

Thanks for this. I will. I do recognize how hard it is, especially in the beginning, to give and receive constructive criticism in such a public space and with individuals with varying levels of acquaintance. Let the trust and good will flow!

[papertissues]

I love the "oddities" of this piece, from the romance between two women to the romance being put in terms of technology. Everything just works well together, and you really capture it with the last line.

[cotidiana]

Thanks again for your kind and specific comments. They help in my thinking about my writing, not to mention my motivation!