30 Rock, General Series. Many Prompts.
Title: More Than You Knew You Wanted
Fandom: 30 Rock
Pairing: Jack/Liz
For: drabbles100
Prompts (In order of appearance): 001. Beginnings, 008. Weeks, 058. Dinner, 033. Too Much, 031. Sunrise, 007. Days, 021. Friends, 085. Missing, 014. Black, 089. She, 005. Last, 034. Not Enough, 011. Red, 059. Food, 072. Fixed, 037. Sound, 077. Paralysis, 018. Green, 071. Broken, 010. Years, 050. Joker, 009. Months, 082. Deaf, 048. Diamond, 096. Writer's Choice (Problem), 006. Hours, 004. First, 003. Ends, 063. Summer, 038. Touch, 025. Strangers, 027. Parents, 013. White, 064. Fall
Word Count: (14 x 100) + (20 x 200) = 5,400
Spoilers: Season One
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Table is here.
Summary: A few moments in Jack and Liz's relationship.
Disclaimer: By writing these drabbles and double drabbles, I am not claiming the characters as mine. Don't sue. Title is from 'She' by Deb Talan, which I also don't own. Don't sue over that, either. Thank you muchly!
*
Beginnings
*
"I'm going to be honest with you, Lemon. I don't think you're hideous."
Liz stares at Jack. "That's... touching."
"Your sarcasm is not appreciated while I'm trying to be sincere with you."
"You don't find me hideous. What else is there to say?"
"I find you rather attractive." He says the last two words quickly. "When you're not singing show tunes or sleeping with your face on a chimichanga."
"You saw that?"
"Pictures were distributed, so, yes."
"You find me attractive," Liz says, trying to wrap her mind around the concept. "Why?"
"If only I had an answer."
"Again: touching."
*
Weeks
*
Jack spends the next couple of weeks trying to romance her. It's kind of weird until it's... not. Because...
She doesn't know why.
There's just something about Jack upping the amount of actual compliments and slightly bringing down the number of insults/backhanded compliments.
"And sometimes he just looks at me like... like he's completely infatuated with me. It's... I don't know. I think I like it."
"You didn't like it before?" Jenna asks.
"Before?"
"You didn't notice? Next you're going to say you never noticed him staring at your boobs."
Liz glances down at them. "Actually, I didn't. Huh."
*
Dinner
*
When Jack officially asks her out to dinner, she doesn't bother asking Jenna for advice. (She's already said, "You have to marry him, Liz." There might have been some intimations that if Jenna doesn't land a rich husband of her own, she'll live off Liz and Jack. "That's practical, not selfish," Jenna declared.) Actually, she doesn't ask anyone for their input, though she feels like this is the sort of thing that she should agree or decline based on statistical data and thorough analysis. (Oh, why didn't she do those polls?)
She just says yes.
Hopefully, she won't regret it.
*
Too Much
*
She doesn't regret having dinner with Jack. Having sex with him... that remains to be seen. But at the moment, it feels like too much for one night. It's not that the sex was bad... it was pretty good. You know. For sex. But does she want to be the girl who gave in too quickly?
Wait. Why is she treating The Rules seriously? She only reread it as a joke. (She initially read it as a joke, too.)
Still. Maybe this will hurt their blossoming relationship.
Oh, God. She's already thinking of herself as Jack's girlfriend. This is insane. And way too much.
*
Sunrise
*
Liz tries to sneak out of his place as the sun is coming up. It's almost a success.
Okay, fine. She wakes him up after she falls while trying to put on her pants.
"What are you doing?" he asks groggily.
She hesitates. "Not sneaking out, that's for sure."
He blinks himself awake. "So I suppose that's exactly what you were attempting to do." He pauses. "What happened? Did I say something strange during the act?"
She furrows her brow. "Like what?"
"That's immaterial. Did I fall asleep before I should have?"
"No."
"Did I eat during my sleep?"
"No. Have you done that?"
He hesitates. "No. So, what's the problem?"
"It's just... I don't know if this'll work, Jack."
"Well, you're hardly giving it a try. And let's be honest, Lemon, you've tried to make it work with men a lot less appealing than me."
Liz tries to think of a way to counter this but finds none. It's pretty reasonable that he considers himself a better catch than Dennis. "You're right. I'm not. And I have."
"So, are you going to give this a try? Or are you going to flee?"
She wordlessly climbs back into his bed.
*
Days
*
She decides to give this thing with Jack seven days before she makes a decision about their future. Which might seem hasty, but he could be ready to marry her in a week, so. She has to figure it out fast.
By day three, she's almost sure she's in love with him. This realization doesn't come after he says something sweet or something almost sweet. Or during a fight, with one of those 'you drive me crazy' light bulbs of love. (She's never had that happen to her before, but it could. Maybe. Stranger things have occurred. She realized she was in love with Conan after he bought her a taco without her asking. Then he wrote a song called 'Taco Girl' for her. Yeah, their relationship was a little weird.)
Anyway.
They're watching a 'Simpsons' rerun (he's never seen an episode before, which kinda weirds her out), and he laughs at a line she's always loved. ("When are they going to get to the fireworks factory?" followed by Milhouse softly whimpering. "It's the crying that really makes it," Jack says, and she agrees.) And she thinks, wow, she loves him.
So... she's probably going to have to see this out.
*
Friends
*
Jenna's ecstatic over Liz's new relationship, and Liz thinks it only has a little to do with Jenna's desire to use Jack's credit cards on a regular basis. Mostly, she seems to find it adorable.
Her enthusiasm is getting kinda creepy.
Pete, however, doesn't comment at all, until he says, "So, you're dating Jack."
"Yep."
"Huh."
Liz sighs. "Just say it."
"What?"
"Whatever you're going to say."
"I wasn't going to say anything."
"You always point out the flaws of the guys I date." She sits back, throws her pen on the desk. It bounces off and falls to the floor, but she doesn't pick it up. That would ruin the vibe. "Have at it."
"I always get my insults for your boyfriends from you, and you haven't given me much material since you stopped saying he was evil." He pauses. "Well, you've given me some stuff, but who among us hasn't fallen asleep on top of a woman or insulted the way you dress?"
Liz frowns. "You're right. You're a parrot."
"Yeah, I'm just trying to suck up to you. Who else would I stay with when my wife throws me out?"
"Nobody. Just me. Because I'm awesome."
He nods. "You certainly are."
*
Missing
*
Toward the end of the day, Jack enters her office. His visage both puzzled and troubled, he says, "I told my mother about our romantic involvement." He pauses, frown deepening. "She still likes you."
"Why wouldn't she? Everyone from me to Pete agrees that I'm awesome."
"I wouldn't use that word, and I think declaring oneself to be it is somewhat strange for a person over sixteen, but you do have a certain... awesomeness."
"Ah ha!" Liz says. "You used the word."
"I used a form of it, but that's irrelevant. The point is, she's hated every woman I've ever cared for. She should hate you."
"Well," she says. "Maybe she didn't hate your girlfriends because they were your girlfriends; maybe she hated them because they were, you know, insane."
"I suspect you're right. However, I still feel she should hate you a little. Otherwise... it's rather unsettling."
"Do you want me to call her and tell her she sucks?"
Jack shakes his head. "That won't be necessary. I suppose I'll get used to this." He pauses. "Though maybe you should insult her indirectly, subtly. Then she won't hate you or love you."
Liz nods. "I will consider this plan."
*
Black
*
The first society function that Liz attends as Jack's actual girlfriend instead of his fake one, Jack picks out a black dress for her to wear.
"It's too..." She hesitates. "I don't know. Sexy."
"There is no such thing."
"Well, what about... a dress that's made out of chain mail and you can see everything..." She searches her memory for something else she saw while flipping through People magazine. "...or a dress where one boob hangs out."
Jack frowns. "That's not sexy. That's terrifying. And I can assure you I would not buy such a dress for anyone, let alone a woman I'm involved with." He pauses. "And have not developed feelings of loathing for."
"Are there a lot of women you would've bought such a dress for?"
"Three," he says without hesitation. "But none of them would accept a present from me now, so I suppose I will never have an opportunity to exact such revenge."
Liz returns to looking at herself in the mirror. "Do you really think I pull this off?"
She can see Jack's reflection when he says, "Of course. You're very beautiful. When you let yourself be."
She rolls her eyes before she kisses him.
*
She
*
Within minutes of entering the party, Liz spots Bianca in the crowd. She instinctively grabs the top of her dress.
Jack looks at her with wide eyes. "She can't attack you from over there."
"I know." Liz notices people staring at her and decides she should stop holding her breasts. "But what if she goes nuts again?"
"Do you wish to leave?"
Liz raises an eyebrow. "You'd leave? We just got here."
"I don't want to stay if you're uncomfortable." He smiles slightly. "And with you touching yourself so provocatively, I'm sure people would just assume we'd returned home to--"
"Do you really want people thinking we're sex addicts?"
"It wouldn't be sex addiction, it would be passion. And the sex addict label would be preferable to what they have been calling us."
Liz frowns. "I'm afraid to ask."
"Rex Harrison and Audrey Hepburn."
"Okay."
"That treats the film version of My Fair Lady as if it's the only adaptation of Pygmalion that matters. That's a travesty."
Bianca finally notices them. Liz grabs onto Jack's arm.
"Let's go." Voice raised, she adds, "Because I really want to do it with you."
"You weren't supposed to announce that," Jack whispers.
*
Last
*
The last thing on Liz's mind as they flee the party is sex, but that changes when they get into the limo. Because he's just... weird and sweet and Jack, and he's stroking her knee, and it would be passion and not sex addiction, so. She straddles him, and while she kind of wishes he were surprised, she likes that there's no hesitation in his kiss. His hands roam over her body, lingering on her breasts as his lips drift down to her neck. She sucks in a breath and runs her hands through his hair... which kind of results in his hair looking ridiculous, but he doesn't notice and/or care, and nobody's going to see him in the immediate future, so. She cups his face and brings his mouth back to hers, kissing him deeply as she rocks her hips against him--
Then the car goes over a bump, she accidentally bites his lip, and... the moment is ruined.
"Well," Jack says, holding a handkerchief to the wound, "I'm sure I'll still be in the mood after my lip stops bleeding."
He's right. But it doesn't stop bleeding until after they get back to his place.
Still.
He's right.
*
Not Enough
*
The first time she makes him watch Star Wars, he frowns all the way through it.
"I must say, I don't comprehend your crazed obsession with this film."
Liz mirrors his frown. "Fascination. I have a fascination. And how can you not like Star Wars? Honestly. Well, you're watching the other two anyway. You have to see the trilogy at least once if this is going to work."
Jack nods. "I suppose I've been through worse in the quest to make a relationship last. Wait, aren't there six Star Wars films?"
"Yeah, but..." She grimaces. "We can ignore the other ones."
*
Red
*
"I'm going to kill him," Liz says. "Literally."
"That would make the Tracy problem worse," Jack points out.
She runs toward the door, though she has no idea what she's going to do, as she doesn't know where Tracy is. Jack beats her there -- damn his inexplicable speed, thwarting her extremely vague plans -- and blocks it.
"You can't face the world with irrational rage. It makes you seem hormonal instead of aggressive. And I'm not saying this because you're a woman; I said those same words to Trump." He frowns. "He didn't listen."
"Ugh, get out of my way."
As Liz is trying to push him away from the door, Jack manages to scoop her up in his arms. He carries her for a couple of steps before she fully realizes what's going on.
"That's pretty impressive."
He nods. "I've been looking for an excuse to do this. I was going to carry you to bed one evening, but I wasn't sure how you'd react."
Liz considers this. "I'd be okay with it. Especially now that I'm prepared." She pauses. "I'm still going to kill Tracy."
"All I ask is that you don't announce it."
"Fair enough. So, want to carry me to some donuts?"
*
Food
*
"Tracy's getting more erratic--"
"It's just his way," Jack says. "He never misses a show."
"That doesn't mean I can't stress out about it."
"I know. Everyone's under stress."
Jack reaches over, taking a handful of her chips. Liz takes one of his cookies.
"Lemon, do you think we're enabling each other?"
She ponders this for a moment. "You mean with the stress eating?" He nods. "Probably."
"Well, at least we know it's unhealthy. That's the first step."
"The second step?"
"Is helping each other quit. Finding another way to calm our anxieties."
"Like have sex?"
Jack considers this. "That could be a way. But not tonight. Eating all these varied food products has made me more than a little nauseous."
That explains why the suggestion didn't make him happier. "Me, too."
The name 'Tracy Jordan' on the CNN ticker catches Liz's eye. It's followed by 'arrested on charges that he threatened a clown.'
"Did you read that?" she asks.
"Yes. Yes, I did."
She grabs another snack from the pile next to her on the couch. "Cheese puff?"
Jack sighs. "Yes." He takes one, adds, "In his defense, I'm sure the clown was being a nuisance. Clowns are never anything but."
*
Fixed
*
Following Tracy's arrest, there is a media uproar that quickly spins in Tracy's favor. The clown was, in fact, being a nuisance and was further discredited when someone from TMZ found a list of goals he'd posted at his LiveJournal. Number three was: "Provoke unstable celebrity into threatening me. Sue for millions."
(Numbers one, two, and four through seven were clown related.)
The next show features a couple of cheap jabs at clowns and gets huge ratings. Jack and Liz don't get to try out the calming effects of sex, but they do get to have celebration sex.
That's fine with her.
*
Sound
*
She wakes up with Michael Crawford's voice in her ears and something soft under her cheek. "Son of a bitch," she mutters as she lifts up her head and looks down at her burritos. They don't look so good now that they've been under her face.
It takes her a moment to notice Jack in the room, and she frowns at him as she takes out her earbuds. "What are you doing?"
"Assuring that no one takes another embarrassing photo of you in this state. I was a little late, but I deleted the ones Josh had on his phone. I can assure you they have not been distributed."
"Thanks." She pauses. "You find me very gross right now, don't you?"
Jack pauses. "It's not your best look, no. But I don't know if gross is the word I'd use."
"Okay, then. Wanna make out?"
"Not at the moment. But this is more a rejection of the food that's on your face." He shakes his head. "I've never really appreciated refried beans."
He moves closer to her and takes a napkin to her cheek.
"I've always dreamt of finding a man who would wipe beans off my face."
He kisses her.
*
Paralysis
*
The first time he says, "I love you," she freezes, but not long enough for him to notice. She's surprised that he said it first... but maybe it shouldn't be so shocking, since he did pursue her. In fact, what surprises her as she starts to truly ponder it is that it hadn't occurred to her to say it yet. She's known for months that she's in love with him.
So, she says it back. Starts to think she might have found the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with.
That thought's a little scary, to be honest.
*
Green
*
For her second society function as Jack's girlfriend, she wears a green dress that she picked out herself. ("I must admit," he said after he saw it, "your fashion taste is getting less disastrous by the day.") As she glances at the crowd, she says to Jack, "If I see Bianca, I'm grabbing my boobs and we're getting out of here."
"Very well. But you and your boobs will have to face her one day."
"Oh, they will not. My boobs are never going to be at another party with her or she'll rip my clothes off."
Liz suddenly notices a man, who's watching her with a wide grin on his face, standing to the side of Jack. She nods in the man's direction, causing Jack to look over. They stare at him for a few moments before Jack guides Liz away.
"Do you know that guy?"
"No. Nor do I wish to." He frowns. "His smile was unsettling." He pauses. "Perhaps you should grab your boobs anyway. Distressing stranger aside, Claude does hold rather dull affairs."
"Consider my boobs grabbed."
Jack's brow furrows, and Liz follows his eyes. Creepy Smiling Man is back.
"Oh," Jack says. "Let's just go."
*
Broken
*
"I don't know if I should broach this," he says as they're driving away from yet another party left early, "but perhaps we could try again--"
"Are you saying you want to grab my boobs?" Liz almost expects the man from the party to show up. Jack glances around, too, so she's not entirely insane. "I might bite your lip, though."
"There's always a risk of unwanted biting," he says. "I've learned to not be bothered. Unless it's malicious. That I don't care for."
"I will, as always, not bite with malice."
"It's things like that which make me so fond of you."
"Non-malicious biting is one of my better qualities."
She straddles him, kisses him lightly on the lips a few times before she lets it deepen. She feels his hands on the outside of her thighs, sliding under the fabric of her dress. He asks if she minds if he takes it off, and she shakes her head. His hands move around to her back, searching for the zipper--
"We're at your building, Mr. Donaghy," the driver's voice says over the intercom. "Traffic was li--"
He presses the button frantically. "Keep driving around!"
Liz frowns. "The mood's ruined again, isn't it?"
"We'll get it back."
They do.
*
Years
*
For the first time in years, Liz actually enjoys having sex on a regular basis. It might be because Jack is good in bed. (He should be; he's had a lot of practice. Which, eww. She doesn't need to think about all the women Jack has slept with. Still. That's probably the practical reason for what skill he has.) But she's slept with guys who are alright in bed, and she's still never really enjoyed it. So. Could it be something as sappy as being in love?
Eh, maybe. What does it matter? She might as well enjoy not dreading sex.
*
Joker
*
"Hey, Liz Lemon," Tracy says, "I hear you're together with Jack Donaghy."
Liz waits for a follow-up; none comes. "Yeah?"
"That's crazy."
Liz ponders this for a moment. "Why?" she asks, because there are plenty of things that could prompt him to come to this conclusion.
Tracy shrugs.
"Did you just find out about this, Tre? Because it's been going on for several months. Like, openly."
"No, I did not just find out about it. I'm not the type of man to be out of the loop."
"Okay."
"Exactly, Liz Lemon! Ex-act-ly."
She doesn't know what to say to that.
*
Months
*
As Jack and Liz's six month anniversary approaches, Jenna gives her a list of all the Donaghy girlfriends she has outlasted. "It's amazing, the things you can learn on Wikipedia," she gushes. "Like how you're at least three months better than Beyoncé!"
"And she's bootylicious," Pete says evenly. "So. That's pretty amazing."
Jenna rolls her eyes. "That song's from years ago."
Pete nods solemnly. "You're right. I need to update my library of Destiny's Child songs."
Liz frowns. "They're not together anymore."
"Wow," he says. "I actually am extremely out of touch. But I guess it's okay, since I don't really care."
*
Deaf
*
"And eight weeks longer than Debra Winger--"
Liz puts her hands over her ears. "I'm not listening to this anymore."
Jenna frowns. "Is it making you feel insecure? Debra Winger's been kidnapped or something, so she's not a threat."
She ignores the fact that Jenna doesn't understand the concept behind Searching for Debra Winger. "I just don't like to think about Jack having sex with other women."
"Oh." Jenna beams, clapping her hands a couple of times. "You're completely in love with him."
"Well... yeah. But I also don't want to picture Martha Stewart naked."
Jenna seems genuinely puzzled. "Why not?"
*
Diamond
*
As soon as she enters his office, he waves her over to his computer. "I found a new remix of the 'Dramatic Chipmunk' video," he giddily informs her.
It's Star Wars themed, with the Dramatic Chipmunk reacting to Darth Vader telling Luke about his true parentage. The 'OMG' is unnecessary, but it's still pretty amusing.
"I thought you'd like that," Jack says. "What with your fascination with Star Wars."
"For the last time, I prefer to call it a fascination, not a crazed obsession," Liz says. "Oh, wait." She scrunches up her face. "You did say fascination."
"Yes."
"Sorry."
"No need to apologize." There's a silence, during which Jack just stares at her. A warm grin spreads over his face, and she assumes he's going to float the idea of doing it in his office. Because, well. She figures he's going to suggest it sooner or later. "I wasn't planning on doing this now," he says. "But--"
He takes a ring box out of his pocket and opens it. As she catches sight of the diamond, her eyes widen.
"Will you marry me?"
For some reason, she runs away. Really fast. Really, really fast.
Oh. This is not right.
*
Problem
*
When Liz gets back to her office, she doesn't know what to do. So, she... just doesn't leave her office. That helps her avoid the problem. Until Jack enters. Unsurprisingly, he doesn't look happy.
"May I ask what that was about?"
"I don't know."
"If you've ceased to feel affection for me--"
"Oh, come on. You know I love you." She has an edge to her voice, and she's really starting to feel like a jerk.
"That's the fifth angriest declaration of love that's ever been directed at me." His frown deepens. "Do you really not know what led you to run out of my office as if I'd proposed murder-suicide instead of marriage?"
"I really don't. I think I'm insane." She takes a deep breath. "No, you know what it is? I was surprised. So ask me again. If I'm expecting it and I run away, then I'm just not ready to get married. But hold onto the ring. And don't hate me."
"Very well."
He takes the box out of his pocket. Opens it. She starts to get out of her chair; but instead of heading for the door, she walks to him.
"I want to marry you," she says.
*
Hours
*
The first few hours as Jack's fiancée are surprisingly normal. Save for Jenna's weird glee, which causes her to request to see the ring so many times that Liz almost wants to give it to her. Not really, though, because she's not sure Jenna would give it back. And that would lead to some embarrassment.
"So," Frank says, "are you going to retire? I know I would if I landed a rich husband. Yes, I said husband, and no, that doesn't make me gay. I was just putting myself in your shoes."
"No, Frank," Liz says. "I'm not going to retire. I love you all too much."
Pete peers curiously at her. "And by that you mean..."
"I'm a workaholic and would go insane without this show."
"That makes more sense."
"Man," Frank says. "A rich husband is wasted on you. Unless you love him. Which I guess you do. But, man. I would retire."
Liz rolls her eyes.
"I'd retire if I found a rich husband, too," Josh says. Everyone gapes at him. "What? No one looked at Frank."
The writers' room is filled with uncomfortable silence.
Yeah. Everything's normal.
Jenna bursts into the room. "Liz! Let me see the ring again."
*
First
*
Jack and Liz decide that she should move in before they think of setting a date. And though she's spent the last several months mostly at Jack's place, it still feels kind of weird to officially live with him. Maybe it's because she hasn't lived with a guy for a long time. (Dennis doesn't count. Pete sleeping on her couch from time to time doesn't count.) It takes a little bit of getting used to, but she likes living with her fiancée. Having someone to go home to. Sharing a bed and a life with another person. That whole thing that she'd been starting to suspect was satisfying only in the abstract. (Maybe because she'd also been starting to suspect that she would never have it.) But, yeah. She likes it. She likes it a lot.
She does worry that his place is so big that he wouldn't hear her choking if he were a couple of rooms away, but. At least there would be someone to find the body. And it wouldn't be long before he discovered her, so...
Yeah. This is a thought she shouldn't share.
But regardless of death-related hypotheticals, living with Jack is a very good thing.
*
Ends
*
On her way to the elevator, she bumps into Conan. She sucks in a breath, trying to ignore the electricity in the air. "Conan."
"Elizabeth." Conan stares at her, seemingly unsure of what to say. He holds up a guitar. "I rewrote your song." He starts to strum and sing. "Taco girl, taco girl. I bought you a taco, my taco girl. Taco girl, taco girl. You're spicy and crunchy, my taco girl. Taco girl, taco girl. Let me put sour cream on your taco, girl." She suddenly realizes how creepy this song is. The electricity is officially gone. "Taco girl, taco girl. Red Irish is better than Black Irish, girl. Taco girl, taco girl. Give me another chance my--"
Liz holds up a hand. "I'm sorry. I'm going to marry him."
"That's okay. I wasn't sure I wanted to leave my wife, anyway."
Liz's smile is strained. "Everything works out, then."
Jack gets out of the next elevator that stops. He and Conan exchange looks as Conan gets on. After the doors close, Jack grumbles, "What was he doing here?"
Liz hesitates. "Singing a song about tacos."
"He would," Jack says dismissively.
Liz isn't sure what he means by that.
*
Summer
*
Jack wants to get married in the summer, but Liz is concerned about the heat. "I can't get married covered in sweat. I'll look gross."
He stares at her. "Exactly where do you think we're going to have this ceremony? Because I can assure you that the church won't be located on the surface of the sun."
"I could get drenched with sweat in about five minutes outside in August. It'll be--"
"Gross. I understand." He frowns at her. He looks sad and she can't figure out why. "What about the fall?"
"The fall's okay. Maybe October. But before Halloween. I don't want Tracy to think he can show up in a costume."
Jack smiles slightly. "If he wants to attend our wedding in a costume, he won't need an excuse."
"Well... we'll put a 'no costume' rule on the invitation."
"I'm sure he'd just take that as a challenge. So, we've eliminated summer and Halloween. And all other holidays, really. People don't want to go to a wedding on Christmas."
"Maybe they would," Liz says. "Especially people who hate their families. And most everyone I know does."
Jack nods. "Touché. However, I don't think a Christmas wedding is really appropriate."
Liz nods. "Another day out."
*
Touch
*
They agree on October 4th. Jack does a lot of the planning, but Jenna helps out. (Reasoning: "I may not have planned an actual wedding, but I've planned a lot of weddings in my head.") With it almost a month away, Jack looks her in the eye, puts his hand on her arm, and says, "Do you really want all this?"
"I never planned on having a big wedding, but I don't have a problem with it. Unless there's something I don't know about. Is there something I don't know about?"
"No. I just wanted to make sure you have no objections."
"No, I'm good." Jack just stares at her, and Liz again waits for him to float the idea of office sex. But as he stays silent, she blurts out, "Let's do it."
She probably could've been smoother about this, but. Eh.
"Excuse me?"
"You know. Illicit office sex. Ooh, sexy."
"I suppose this is not something you've done before."
"No. But I've never been with the sort of guys who would do it on a desk. Or whom I'd want to do it on a desk with. So. Let's do it on your desk."
He smiles at her and locks the door.
*
Strangers
*
Office sex is surprisingly addictive. Uncomfortable at times, but enjoyable. Liz starts to feel a little icky about it, as she's not entirely sure that Jonathan can't hear them. But. She's having sex with her fiancée, not a bunch of random dudes. That'd be a lot ickier. (Jenna tells her that's something Samantha would do, but Liz is totally being a Charlotte. "Charlotte would like having sex with Jack. But who wouldn't?" Liz isn't sure how to respond to that, but she does know she'd rather not be compared to any Sex and the City characters.)
Two weeks before the wedding, though, Liz puts a stop to it.
"We can't do this anymore. When Jonathan's outside."
"Fair enough."
*
Parents
*
Jack's mother flies in four days before the wedding. Liz is concerned that he's going to have another heart attack. Jack claims he's not worried; he thinks that marrying a woman his mother doesn't have contempt for will help smooth out their relationship.
He's right. To a point. His mother is still bossy and brash, still puts him under stress, but she's more interested in complimenting Liz than ridiculing her, which brings down the number of insults she lobs at Jack.
"If only I had found you a few years ago," Jack says. "Perhaps I wouldn't have spent so much money on therapy."
*
White
*
Jack insists on seeing her before the wedding. ("I didn't see Bianca in her dress before she walked down the aisle, and I'd say our marriage was doomed with less luck, not more.") He tells her how beautiful she looks, then stops. "Don't take this the wrong way--"
"Yes, sometimes it looks like I have an overbite--"
"No. I want to discuss something more important than whatever flaws your mouth may have. I..." Liz has never seen Jack so reticent before. "Again, don't take this the wrong way... but are you sure you're not going to bolt?"
"Bolt?"
"You considered bolting the morning after we first made love. You literally ran away the first time I asked you to marry me. You must understand that I'm... concerned."
She takes a breath. "I'll admit, if anyone had told me when we first met that I'd ever like you, let alone love you, I would've smacked them upside the head. And I've had moments of doubt..."
"That's... touching."
"But I'm sure I want to marry you. Even though you're not the sort of guy I ever thought I'd want to marry."
"Again: touching."
He kisses her with a smile on his face.
*
Fall
*
On her way down the aisle, Liz is afraid that something's going to go wrong. Not that she's going to bolt -- she was certain about being certain -- but that she's going to fall flat on her face. Because, well, there are so many people watching her. She has to screw up somehow.
But she doesn't. She makes it to the altar. She doesn't mess up her vows. And just like that, she's married to an overly-confident rich guy who's more than a little weird and is the complete opposite of what she's always wanted.
Liz has never been happier.
END
Fandom: 30 Rock
Pairing: Jack/Liz
For: drabbles100
Prompts (In order of appearance): 001. Beginnings, 008. Weeks, 058. Dinner, 033. Too Much, 031. Sunrise, 007. Days, 021. Friends, 085. Missing, 014. Black, 089. She, 005. Last, 034. Not Enough, 011. Red, 059. Food, 072. Fixed, 037. Sound, 077. Paralysis, 018. Green, 071. Broken, 010. Years, 050. Joker, 009. Months, 082. Deaf, 048. Diamond, 096. Writer's Choice (Problem), 006. Hours, 004. First, 003. Ends, 063. Summer, 038. Touch, 025. Strangers, 027. Parents, 013. White, 064. Fall
Word Count: (14 x 100) + (20 x 200) = 5,400
Spoilers: Season One
Rating: PG-13
Author's Notes: Table is here.
Summary: A few moments in Jack and Liz's relationship.
Disclaimer: By writing these drabbles and double drabbles, I am not claiming the characters as mine. Don't sue. Title is from 'She' by Deb Talan, which I also don't own. Don't sue over that, either. Thank you muchly!
*
Beginnings
*
"I'm going to be honest with you, Lemon. I don't think you're hideous."
Liz stares at Jack. "That's... touching."
"Your sarcasm is not appreciated while I'm trying to be sincere with you."
"You don't find me hideous. What else is there to say?"
"I find you rather attractive." He says the last two words quickly. "When you're not singing show tunes or sleeping with your face on a chimichanga."
"You saw that?"
"Pictures were distributed, so, yes."
"You find me attractive," Liz says, trying to wrap her mind around the concept. "Why?"
"If only I had an answer."
"Again: touching."
*
Weeks
*
Jack spends the next couple of weeks trying to romance her. It's kind of weird until it's... not. Because...
She doesn't know why.
There's just something about Jack upping the amount of actual compliments and slightly bringing down the number of insults/backhanded compliments.
"And sometimes he just looks at me like... like he's completely infatuated with me. It's... I don't know. I think I like it."
"You didn't like it before?" Jenna asks.
"Before?"
"You didn't notice? Next you're going to say you never noticed him staring at your boobs."
Liz glances down at them. "Actually, I didn't. Huh."
*
Dinner
*
When Jack officially asks her out to dinner, she doesn't bother asking Jenna for advice. (She's already said, "You have to marry him, Liz." There might have been some intimations that if Jenna doesn't land a rich husband of her own, she'll live off Liz and Jack. "That's practical, not selfish," Jenna declared.) Actually, she doesn't ask anyone for their input, though she feels like this is the sort of thing that she should agree or decline based on statistical data and thorough analysis. (Oh, why didn't she do those polls?)
She just says yes.
Hopefully, she won't regret it.
*
Too Much
*
She doesn't regret having dinner with Jack. Having sex with him... that remains to be seen. But at the moment, it feels like too much for one night. It's not that the sex was bad... it was pretty good. You know. For sex. But does she want to be the girl who gave in too quickly?
Wait. Why is she treating The Rules seriously? She only reread it as a joke. (She initially read it as a joke, too.)
Still. Maybe this will hurt their blossoming relationship.
Oh, God. She's already thinking of herself as Jack's girlfriend. This is insane. And way too much.
*
Sunrise
*
Liz tries to sneak out of his place as the sun is coming up. It's almost a success.
Okay, fine. She wakes him up after she falls while trying to put on her pants.
"What are you doing?" he asks groggily.
She hesitates. "Not sneaking out, that's for sure."
He blinks himself awake. "So I suppose that's exactly what you were attempting to do." He pauses. "What happened? Did I say something strange during the act?"
She furrows her brow. "Like what?"
"That's immaterial. Did I fall asleep before I should have?"
"No."
"Did I eat during my sleep?"
"No. Have you done that?"
He hesitates. "No. So, what's the problem?"
"It's just... I don't know if this'll work, Jack."
"Well, you're hardly giving it a try. And let's be honest, Lemon, you've tried to make it work with men a lot less appealing than me."
Liz tries to think of a way to counter this but finds none. It's pretty reasonable that he considers himself a better catch than Dennis. "You're right. I'm not. And I have."
"So, are you going to give this a try? Or are you going to flee?"
She wordlessly climbs back into his bed.
*
Days
*
She decides to give this thing with Jack seven days before she makes a decision about their future. Which might seem hasty, but he could be ready to marry her in a week, so. She has to figure it out fast.
By day three, she's almost sure she's in love with him. This realization doesn't come after he says something sweet or something almost sweet. Or during a fight, with one of those 'you drive me crazy' light bulbs of love. (She's never had that happen to her before, but it could. Maybe. Stranger things have occurred. She realized she was in love with Conan after he bought her a taco without her asking. Then he wrote a song called 'Taco Girl' for her. Yeah, their relationship was a little weird.)
Anyway.
They're watching a 'Simpsons' rerun (he's never seen an episode before, which kinda weirds her out), and he laughs at a line she's always loved. ("When are they going to get to the fireworks factory?" followed by Milhouse softly whimpering. "It's the crying that really makes it," Jack says, and she agrees.) And she thinks, wow, she loves him.
So... she's probably going to have to see this out.
*
Friends
*
Jenna's ecstatic over Liz's new relationship, and Liz thinks it only has a little to do with Jenna's desire to use Jack's credit cards on a regular basis. Mostly, she seems to find it adorable.
Her enthusiasm is getting kinda creepy.
Pete, however, doesn't comment at all, until he says, "So, you're dating Jack."
"Yep."
"Huh."
Liz sighs. "Just say it."
"What?"
"Whatever you're going to say."
"I wasn't going to say anything."
"You always point out the flaws of the guys I date." She sits back, throws her pen on the desk. It bounces off and falls to the floor, but she doesn't pick it up. That would ruin the vibe. "Have at it."
"I always get my insults for your boyfriends from you, and you haven't given me much material since you stopped saying he was evil." He pauses. "Well, you've given me some stuff, but who among us hasn't fallen asleep on top of a woman or insulted the way you dress?"
Liz frowns. "You're right. You're a parrot."
"Yeah, I'm just trying to suck up to you. Who else would I stay with when my wife throws me out?"
"Nobody. Just me. Because I'm awesome."
He nods. "You certainly are."
*
Missing
*
Toward the end of the day, Jack enters her office. His visage both puzzled and troubled, he says, "I told my mother about our romantic involvement." He pauses, frown deepening. "She still likes you."
"Why wouldn't she? Everyone from me to Pete agrees that I'm awesome."
"I wouldn't use that word, and I think declaring oneself to be it is somewhat strange for a person over sixteen, but you do have a certain... awesomeness."
"Ah ha!" Liz says. "You used the word."
"I used a form of it, but that's irrelevant. The point is, she's hated every woman I've ever cared for. She should hate you."
"Well," she says. "Maybe she didn't hate your girlfriends because they were your girlfriends; maybe she hated them because they were, you know, insane."
"I suspect you're right. However, I still feel she should hate you a little. Otherwise... it's rather unsettling."
"Do you want me to call her and tell her she sucks?"
Jack shakes his head. "That won't be necessary. I suppose I'll get used to this." He pauses. "Though maybe you should insult her indirectly, subtly. Then she won't hate you or love you."
Liz nods. "I will consider this plan."
*
Black
*
The first society function that Liz attends as Jack's actual girlfriend instead of his fake one, Jack picks out a black dress for her to wear.
"It's too..." She hesitates. "I don't know. Sexy."
"There is no such thing."
"Well, what about... a dress that's made out of chain mail and you can see everything..." She searches her memory for something else she saw while flipping through People magazine. "...or a dress where one boob hangs out."
Jack frowns. "That's not sexy. That's terrifying. And I can assure you I would not buy such a dress for anyone, let alone a woman I'm involved with." He pauses. "And have not developed feelings of loathing for."
"Are there a lot of women you would've bought such a dress for?"
"Three," he says without hesitation. "But none of them would accept a present from me now, so I suppose I will never have an opportunity to exact such revenge."
Liz returns to looking at herself in the mirror. "Do you really think I pull this off?"
She can see Jack's reflection when he says, "Of course. You're very beautiful. When you let yourself be."
She rolls her eyes before she kisses him.
*
She
*
Within minutes of entering the party, Liz spots Bianca in the crowd. She instinctively grabs the top of her dress.
Jack looks at her with wide eyes. "She can't attack you from over there."
"I know." Liz notices people staring at her and decides she should stop holding her breasts. "But what if she goes nuts again?"
"Do you wish to leave?"
Liz raises an eyebrow. "You'd leave? We just got here."
"I don't want to stay if you're uncomfortable." He smiles slightly. "And with you touching yourself so provocatively, I'm sure people would just assume we'd returned home to--"
"Do you really want people thinking we're sex addicts?"
"It wouldn't be sex addiction, it would be passion. And the sex addict label would be preferable to what they have been calling us."
Liz frowns. "I'm afraid to ask."
"Rex Harrison and Audrey Hepburn."
"Okay."
"That treats the film version of My Fair Lady as if it's the only adaptation of Pygmalion that matters. That's a travesty."
Bianca finally notices them. Liz grabs onto Jack's arm.
"Let's go." Voice raised, she adds, "Because I really want to do it with you."
"You weren't supposed to announce that," Jack whispers.
*
Last
*
The last thing on Liz's mind as they flee the party is sex, but that changes when they get into the limo. Because he's just... weird and sweet and Jack, and he's stroking her knee, and it would be passion and not sex addiction, so. She straddles him, and while she kind of wishes he were surprised, she likes that there's no hesitation in his kiss. His hands roam over her body, lingering on her breasts as his lips drift down to her neck. She sucks in a breath and runs her hands through his hair... which kind of results in his hair looking ridiculous, but he doesn't notice and/or care, and nobody's going to see him in the immediate future, so. She cups his face and brings his mouth back to hers, kissing him deeply as she rocks her hips against him--
Then the car goes over a bump, she accidentally bites his lip, and... the moment is ruined.
"Well," Jack says, holding a handkerchief to the wound, "I'm sure I'll still be in the mood after my lip stops bleeding."
He's right. But it doesn't stop bleeding until after they get back to his place.
Still.
He's right.
*
Not Enough
*
The first time she makes him watch Star Wars, he frowns all the way through it.
"I must say, I don't comprehend your crazed obsession with this film."
Liz mirrors his frown. "Fascination. I have a fascination. And how can you not like Star Wars? Honestly. Well, you're watching the other two anyway. You have to see the trilogy at least once if this is going to work."
Jack nods. "I suppose I've been through worse in the quest to make a relationship last. Wait, aren't there six Star Wars films?"
"Yeah, but..." She grimaces. "We can ignore the other ones."
*
Red
*
"I'm going to kill him," Liz says. "Literally."
"That would make the Tracy problem worse," Jack points out.
She runs toward the door, though she has no idea what she's going to do, as she doesn't know where Tracy is. Jack beats her there -- damn his inexplicable speed, thwarting her extremely vague plans -- and blocks it.
"You can't face the world with irrational rage. It makes you seem hormonal instead of aggressive. And I'm not saying this because you're a woman; I said those same words to Trump." He frowns. "He didn't listen."
"Ugh, get out of my way."
As Liz is trying to push him away from the door, Jack manages to scoop her up in his arms. He carries her for a couple of steps before she fully realizes what's going on.
"That's pretty impressive."
He nods. "I've been looking for an excuse to do this. I was going to carry you to bed one evening, but I wasn't sure how you'd react."
Liz considers this. "I'd be okay with it. Especially now that I'm prepared." She pauses. "I'm still going to kill Tracy."
"All I ask is that you don't announce it."
"Fair enough. So, want to carry me to some donuts?"
*
Food
*
"Tracy's getting more erratic--"
"It's just his way," Jack says. "He never misses a show."
"That doesn't mean I can't stress out about it."
"I know. Everyone's under stress."
Jack reaches over, taking a handful of her chips. Liz takes one of his cookies.
"Lemon, do you think we're enabling each other?"
She ponders this for a moment. "You mean with the stress eating?" He nods. "Probably."
"Well, at least we know it's unhealthy. That's the first step."
"The second step?"
"Is helping each other quit. Finding another way to calm our anxieties."
"Like have sex?"
Jack considers this. "That could be a way. But not tonight. Eating all these varied food products has made me more than a little nauseous."
That explains why the suggestion didn't make him happier. "Me, too."
The name 'Tracy Jordan' on the CNN ticker catches Liz's eye. It's followed by 'arrested on charges that he threatened a clown.'
"Did you read that?" she asks.
"Yes. Yes, I did."
She grabs another snack from the pile next to her on the couch. "Cheese puff?"
Jack sighs. "Yes." He takes one, adds, "In his defense, I'm sure the clown was being a nuisance. Clowns are never anything but."
*
Fixed
*
Following Tracy's arrest, there is a media uproar that quickly spins in Tracy's favor. The clown was, in fact, being a nuisance and was further discredited when someone from TMZ found a list of goals he'd posted at his LiveJournal. Number three was: "Provoke unstable celebrity into threatening me. Sue for millions."
(Numbers one, two, and four through seven were clown related.)
The next show features a couple of cheap jabs at clowns and gets huge ratings. Jack and Liz don't get to try out the calming effects of sex, but they do get to have celebration sex.
That's fine with her.
*
Sound
*
She wakes up with Michael Crawford's voice in her ears and something soft under her cheek. "Son of a bitch," she mutters as she lifts up her head and looks down at her burritos. They don't look so good now that they've been under her face.
It takes her a moment to notice Jack in the room, and she frowns at him as she takes out her earbuds. "What are you doing?"
"Assuring that no one takes another embarrassing photo of you in this state. I was a little late, but I deleted the ones Josh had on his phone. I can assure you they have not been distributed."
"Thanks." She pauses. "You find me very gross right now, don't you?"
Jack pauses. "It's not your best look, no. But I don't know if gross is the word I'd use."
"Okay, then. Wanna make out?"
"Not at the moment. But this is more a rejection of the food that's on your face." He shakes his head. "I've never really appreciated refried beans."
He moves closer to her and takes a napkin to her cheek.
"I've always dreamt of finding a man who would wipe beans off my face."
He kisses her.
*
Paralysis
*
The first time he says, "I love you," she freezes, but not long enough for him to notice. She's surprised that he said it first... but maybe it shouldn't be so shocking, since he did pursue her. In fact, what surprises her as she starts to truly ponder it is that it hadn't occurred to her to say it yet. She's known for months that she's in love with him.
So, she says it back. Starts to think she might have found the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with.
That thought's a little scary, to be honest.
*
Green
*
For her second society function as Jack's girlfriend, she wears a green dress that she picked out herself. ("I must admit," he said after he saw it, "your fashion taste is getting less disastrous by the day.") As she glances at the crowd, she says to Jack, "If I see Bianca, I'm grabbing my boobs and we're getting out of here."
"Very well. But you and your boobs will have to face her one day."
"Oh, they will not. My boobs are never going to be at another party with her or she'll rip my clothes off."
Liz suddenly notices a man, who's watching her with a wide grin on his face, standing to the side of Jack. She nods in the man's direction, causing Jack to look over. They stare at him for a few moments before Jack guides Liz away.
"Do you know that guy?"
"No. Nor do I wish to." He frowns. "His smile was unsettling." He pauses. "Perhaps you should grab your boobs anyway. Distressing stranger aside, Claude does hold rather dull affairs."
"Consider my boobs grabbed."
Jack's brow furrows, and Liz follows his eyes. Creepy Smiling Man is back.
"Oh," Jack says. "Let's just go."
*
Broken
*
"I don't know if I should broach this," he says as they're driving away from yet another party left early, "but perhaps we could try again--"
"Are you saying you want to grab my boobs?" Liz almost expects the man from the party to show up. Jack glances around, too, so she's not entirely insane. "I might bite your lip, though."
"There's always a risk of unwanted biting," he says. "I've learned to not be bothered. Unless it's malicious. That I don't care for."
"I will, as always, not bite with malice."
"It's things like that which make me so fond of you."
"Non-malicious biting is one of my better qualities."
She straddles him, kisses him lightly on the lips a few times before she lets it deepen. She feels his hands on the outside of her thighs, sliding under the fabric of her dress. He asks if she minds if he takes it off, and she shakes her head. His hands move around to her back, searching for the zipper--
"We're at your building, Mr. Donaghy," the driver's voice says over the intercom. "Traffic was li--"
He presses the button frantically. "Keep driving around!"
Liz frowns. "The mood's ruined again, isn't it?"
"We'll get it back."
They do.
*
Years
*
For the first time in years, Liz actually enjoys having sex on a regular basis. It might be because Jack is good in bed. (He should be; he's had a lot of practice. Which, eww. She doesn't need to think about all the women Jack has slept with. Still. That's probably the practical reason for what skill he has.) But she's slept with guys who are alright in bed, and she's still never really enjoyed it. So. Could it be something as sappy as being in love?
Eh, maybe. What does it matter? She might as well enjoy not dreading sex.
*
Joker
*
"Hey, Liz Lemon," Tracy says, "I hear you're together with Jack Donaghy."
Liz waits for a follow-up; none comes. "Yeah?"
"That's crazy."
Liz ponders this for a moment. "Why?" she asks, because there are plenty of things that could prompt him to come to this conclusion.
Tracy shrugs.
"Did you just find out about this, Tre? Because it's been going on for several months. Like, openly."
"No, I did not just find out about it. I'm not the type of man to be out of the loop."
"Okay."
"Exactly, Liz Lemon! Ex-act-ly."
She doesn't know what to say to that.
*
Months
*
As Jack and Liz's six month anniversary approaches, Jenna gives her a list of all the Donaghy girlfriends she has outlasted. "It's amazing, the things you can learn on Wikipedia," she gushes. "Like how you're at least three months better than Beyoncé!"
"And she's bootylicious," Pete says evenly. "So. That's pretty amazing."
Jenna rolls her eyes. "That song's from years ago."
Pete nods solemnly. "You're right. I need to update my library of Destiny's Child songs."
Liz frowns. "They're not together anymore."
"Wow," he says. "I actually am extremely out of touch. But I guess it's okay, since I don't really care."
*
Deaf
*
"And eight weeks longer than Debra Winger--"
Liz puts her hands over her ears. "I'm not listening to this anymore."
Jenna frowns. "Is it making you feel insecure? Debra Winger's been kidnapped or something, so she's not a threat."
She ignores the fact that Jenna doesn't understand the concept behind Searching for Debra Winger. "I just don't like to think about Jack having sex with other women."
"Oh." Jenna beams, clapping her hands a couple of times. "You're completely in love with him."
"Well... yeah. But I also don't want to picture Martha Stewart naked."
Jenna seems genuinely puzzled. "Why not?"
*
Diamond
*
As soon as she enters his office, he waves her over to his computer. "I found a new remix of the 'Dramatic Chipmunk' video," he giddily informs her.
It's Star Wars themed, with the Dramatic Chipmunk reacting to Darth Vader telling Luke about his true parentage. The 'OMG' is unnecessary, but it's still pretty amusing.
"I thought you'd like that," Jack says. "What with your fascination with Star Wars."
"For the last time, I prefer to call it a fascination, not a crazed obsession," Liz says. "Oh, wait." She scrunches up her face. "You did say fascination."
"Yes."
"Sorry."
"No need to apologize." There's a silence, during which Jack just stares at her. A warm grin spreads over his face, and she assumes he's going to float the idea of doing it in his office. Because, well. She figures he's going to suggest it sooner or later. "I wasn't planning on doing this now," he says. "But--"
He takes a ring box out of his pocket and opens it. As she catches sight of the diamond, her eyes widen.
"Will you marry me?"
For some reason, she runs away. Really fast. Really, really fast.
Oh. This is not right.
*
Problem
*
When Liz gets back to her office, she doesn't know what to do. So, she... just doesn't leave her office. That helps her avoid the problem. Until Jack enters. Unsurprisingly, he doesn't look happy.
"May I ask what that was about?"
"I don't know."
"If you've ceased to feel affection for me--"
"Oh, come on. You know I love you." She has an edge to her voice, and she's really starting to feel like a jerk.
"That's the fifth angriest declaration of love that's ever been directed at me." His frown deepens. "Do you really not know what led you to run out of my office as if I'd proposed murder-suicide instead of marriage?"
"I really don't. I think I'm insane." She takes a deep breath. "No, you know what it is? I was surprised. So ask me again. If I'm expecting it and I run away, then I'm just not ready to get married. But hold onto the ring. And don't hate me."
"Very well."
He takes the box out of his pocket. Opens it. She starts to get out of her chair; but instead of heading for the door, she walks to him.
"I want to marry you," she says.
*
Hours
*
The first few hours as Jack's fiancée are surprisingly normal. Save for Jenna's weird glee, which causes her to request to see the ring so many times that Liz almost wants to give it to her. Not really, though, because she's not sure Jenna would give it back. And that would lead to some embarrassment.
"So," Frank says, "are you going to retire? I know I would if I landed a rich husband. Yes, I said husband, and no, that doesn't make me gay. I was just putting myself in your shoes."
"No, Frank," Liz says. "I'm not going to retire. I love you all too much."
Pete peers curiously at her. "And by that you mean..."
"I'm a workaholic and would go insane without this show."
"That makes more sense."
"Man," Frank says. "A rich husband is wasted on you. Unless you love him. Which I guess you do. But, man. I would retire."
Liz rolls her eyes.
"I'd retire if I found a rich husband, too," Josh says. Everyone gapes at him. "What? No one looked at Frank."
The writers' room is filled with uncomfortable silence.
Yeah. Everything's normal.
Jenna bursts into the room. "Liz! Let me see the ring again."
*
First
*
Jack and Liz decide that she should move in before they think of setting a date. And though she's spent the last several months mostly at Jack's place, it still feels kind of weird to officially live with him. Maybe it's because she hasn't lived with a guy for a long time. (Dennis doesn't count. Pete sleeping on her couch from time to time doesn't count.) It takes a little bit of getting used to, but she likes living with her fiancée. Having someone to go home to. Sharing a bed and a life with another person. That whole thing that she'd been starting to suspect was satisfying only in the abstract. (Maybe because she'd also been starting to suspect that she would never have it.) But, yeah. She likes it. She likes it a lot.
She does worry that his place is so big that he wouldn't hear her choking if he were a couple of rooms away, but. At least there would be someone to find the body. And it wouldn't be long before he discovered her, so...
Yeah. This is a thought she shouldn't share.
But regardless of death-related hypotheticals, living with Jack is a very good thing.
*
Ends
*
On her way to the elevator, she bumps into Conan. She sucks in a breath, trying to ignore the electricity in the air. "Conan."
"Elizabeth." Conan stares at her, seemingly unsure of what to say. He holds up a guitar. "I rewrote your song." He starts to strum and sing. "Taco girl, taco girl. I bought you a taco, my taco girl. Taco girl, taco girl. You're spicy and crunchy, my taco girl. Taco girl, taco girl. Let me put sour cream on your taco, girl." She suddenly realizes how creepy this song is. The electricity is officially gone. "Taco girl, taco girl. Red Irish is better than Black Irish, girl. Taco girl, taco girl. Give me another chance my--"
Liz holds up a hand. "I'm sorry. I'm going to marry him."
"That's okay. I wasn't sure I wanted to leave my wife, anyway."
Liz's smile is strained. "Everything works out, then."
Jack gets out of the next elevator that stops. He and Conan exchange looks as Conan gets on. After the doors close, Jack grumbles, "What was he doing here?"
Liz hesitates. "Singing a song about tacos."
"He would," Jack says dismissively.
Liz isn't sure what he means by that.
*
Summer
*
Jack wants to get married in the summer, but Liz is concerned about the heat. "I can't get married covered in sweat. I'll look gross."
He stares at her. "Exactly where do you think we're going to have this ceremony? Because I can assure you that the church won't be located on the surface of the sun."
"I could get drenched with sweat in about five minutes outside in August. It'll be--"
"Gross. I understand." He frowns at her. He looks sad and she can't figure out why. "What about the fall?"
"The fall's okay. Maybe October. But before Halloween. I don't want Tracy to think he can show up in a costume."
Jack smiles slightly. "If he wants to attend our wedding in a costume, he won't need an excuse."
"Well... we'll put a 'no costume' rule on the invitation."
"I'm sure he'd just take that as a challenge. So, we've eliminated summer and Halloween. And all other holidays, really. People don't want to go to a wedding on Christmas."
"Maybe they would," Liz says. "Especially people who hate their families. And most everyone I know does."
Jack nods. "Touché. However, I don't think a Christmas wedding is really appropriate."
Liz nods. "Another day out."
*
Touch
*
They agree on October 4th. Jack does a lot of the planning, but Jenna helps out. (Reasoning: "I may not have planned an actual wedding, but I've planned a lot of weddings in my head.") With it almost a month away, Jack looks her in the eye, puts his hand on her arm, and says, "Do you really want all this?"
"I never planned on having a big wedding, but I don't have a problem with it. Unless there's something I don't know about. Is there something I don't know about?"
"No. I just wanted to make sure you have no objections."
"No, I'm good." Jack just stares at her, and Liz again waits for him to float the idea of office sex. But as he stays silent, she blurts out, "Let's do it."
She probably could've been smoother about this, but. Eh.
"Excuse me?"
"You know. Illicit office sex. Ooh, sexy."
"I suppose this is not something you've done before."
"No. But I've never been with the sort of guys who would do it on a desk. Or whom I'd want to do it on a desk with. So. Let's do it on your desk."
He smiles at her and locks the door.
*
Strangers
*
Office sex is surprisingly addictive. Uncomfortable at times, but enjoyable. Liz starts to feel a little icky about it, as she's not entirely sure that Jonathan can't hear them. But. She's having sex with her fiancée, not a bunch of random dudes. That'd be a lot ickier. (Jenna tells her that's something Samantha would do, but Liz is totally being a Charlotte. "Charlotte would like having sex with Jack. But who wouldn't?" Liz isn't sure how to respond to that, but she does know she'd rather not be compared to any Sex and the City characters.)
Two weeks before the wedding, though, Liz puts a stop to it.
"We can't do this anymore. When Jonathan's outside."
"Fair enough."
*
Parents
*
Jack's mother flies in four days before the wedding. Liz is concerned that he's going to have another heart attack. Jack claims he's not worried; he thinks that marrying a woman his mother doesn't have contempt for will help smooth out their relationship.
He's right. To a point. His mother is still bossy and brash, still puts him under stress, but she's more interested in complimenting Liz than ridiculing her, which brings down the number of insults she lobs at Jack.
"If only I had found you a few years ago," Jack says. "Perhaps I wouldn't have spent so much money on therapy."
*
White
*
Jack insists on seeing her before the wedding. ("I didn't see Bianca in her dress before she walked down the aisle, and I'd say our marriage was doomed with less luck, not more.") He tells her how beautiful she looks, then stops. "Don't take this the wrong way--"
"Yes, sometimes it looks like I have an overbite--"
"No. I want to discuss something more important than whatever flaws your mouth may have. I..." Liz has never seen Jack so reticent before. "Again, don't take this the wrong way... but are you sure you're not going to bolt?"
"Bolt?"
"You considered bolting the morning after we first made love. You literally ran away the first time I asked you to marry me. You must understand that I'm... concerned."
She takes a breath. "I'll admit, if anyone had told me when we first met that I'd ever like you, let alone love you, I would've smacked them upside the head. And I've had moments of doubt..."
"That's... touching."
"But I'm sure I want to marry you. Even though you're not the sort of guy I ever thought I'd want to marry."
"Again: touching."
He kisses her with a smile on his face.
*
Fall
*
On her way down the aisle, Liz is afraid that something's going to go wrong. Not that she's going to bolt -- she was certain about being certain -- but that she's going to fall flat on her face. Because, well, there are so many people watching her. She has to screw up somehow.
But she doesn't. She makes it to the altar. She doesn't mess up her vows. And just like that, she's married to an overly-confident rich guy who's more than a little weird and is the complete opposite of what she's always wanted.
Liz has never been happier.
END