[YamaJima] The moment everything changed - Oneshot
Title: The moment everything changed
Pairing: Yamajima, Ariyama
Genre: Angst, hc, (cd)
Rating: PG-13 to be safe
Author: Mi
A/N Yamajima again, nee~~ but it had to be Yamajima since out of all pairings I think they have the strongest emotional connection. There isn’t much Yamajima in this fic though. Mostly Ariyama. maa… This is kind of sad. A sad story. And I guess it will have a sequel since I have an idea for it already (or two, I’m not sure yet) :P Anyways, enjoy <3
[its fragile beauty was fascinating]„How is he?“
„He was really lucky - or maybe he simply acted right. He has severe injuries, but he obviously managed to protect his head with something. His state is steady and not critical anymore, so the chance that he’ll survive is very-“
A groan escaped my lips. The voices woke me up and immediately I was overwhelmed by several impressions. The pain in my head and my whole body exploded. I tried to open my eyes, but as soon as I my lids parted the brightness of the white ceiling burned into them. Everything was white, the walls, the furniture, the blanket on my bed. I thought I will become blind anytime.
My brain wasn’t able yet to remember where I was and why I was here, but I recognized the room as a hospital.
Even though it hurt like hell I turned my head slowly into the direction where I thought the voices came from. I couldn’t help but to be amazed by what I saw, not because there was a doctor like I supposed already, but also my best friend Daiki was there. Daiki’s face was dumbfounded, but his expression changed into relief quickly. He flashed a big smile to me and I tried to return it.
Suddenly my whole attention was occupied by the doctors and nurses that surrounded my bed. I was quite surprised, I didn’t notice them at all. Apparently my thoughts showed on my face again, like always, because I could see Daiki’s smirking face.
The doctors checked frantically the machines connected to my body, turned some off and some new ones on. The nurses chattered excitedly. I couldn’t follow their conversation, but the words they used the most were ‘impossible’ and ‘miracle’. One of the doctors took my blood with a syringe to have it analyzed. Unconsciously I shot him a death glare so that he would have died immediately.
Daiki held back a laugh. Seeing him struggling so hard made me grin widely. Daiki knew me better than anyone else. He would never let me down, only when the end of the world comes. Nah, not even then. He was the one that saved me when I was in trouble, he proved it more than just once that he would always be there for me.
Hastily the doctors and nurses left the room. One stayed behind and wrote some incomprehensible words onto the board in his hand, changed some words with Daiki, but then he followed the others and left me alone with Daiki.
“Ahh, Ryo.. What did you do again?” Daiki sighed. Irritated I looked into his face. His arms were crossed in front of his chest and he shook his head sarcastically.
“I didn’t do anything!” I defended myself, but my friend with his tongue-in-cheek talk just ignored me and sat next to me onto the bed.
“You are very lucky. Why didn’t you share it with the others?” he said. His voice was very serious which sent chills down my spine. He never talked seriously, only when something special happened. Daiki turned his head, unable to look at me.
“Daiki?”
“………”
“Daiki, what happened?” I said and now I noticed how broken my voice was. Like in slow motion he looked at me again. He opened his mouth to say something, but just closed it again. Something in his eyes made me feel bad.
“Ryo..” Daiki started, but he couldn’t end his sentence. “Do you know why you’re here?”
“No” I answered honestly. “We were on our way to a location shooting, but then my mind is blank” I was somehow afraid of what Daiki will tell me. I didn’t have any memory. The last thing I knew was me sitting in a little bus with Yuto, Yuya, Kota and Keito. The other members were in another bus. Yuto managed to persuade Hikaru to change seats with him because he wanted to sit next to me and not in the other bus. Not long ago he confessed to me. I was just too happy and never wanted to be parted from him so I was glad when Hikaru agreed. I guess he wanted to sit with Yuri rather than with me anyways.
“You know.. Ryo..” Daiki’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “There was an a-accident and.. and” Daiki’s voice trembled.
“Daiki?”
Daiki didn’t say anything. He tried to calm down, but I could see how his eyes started to sparkle and how he held back tears. Then he looked deep into my eyes and moved his lips. He formed a word with his mouth. I understood but I didn’t want to understand.
‘dead’
Dead. Dead. Dead? They are… dead? Yuya, Kota, Keito, Yuto. Dead? My friends and bandmates. My supporters and mood makers. My boyfriend. Dead?
Many thoughts simultaneously shot through my head like bullets of a pistol, they collapsed, mixed and built new structures without any sense. I felt like the time stopped while my heart was racing in a fast pace and the world disappeared piece by piece.
I fell into a black eternity, empty and cold, built by the loss of my dear friends and the hole in my heart.
I heard Daiki speaking to me, but I didn’t listen to him. I felt his hand touching my shoulder understanding and soothing, but my senses didn’t recognize it.
I became cold, so cold in this white hell I’m caged in. Slowly and painfully the cold crept through my veins, grabbed my lung with its icy claws and took my air to breath. I lost all my warmth, my body was like paralyzed. I tried to fix a spot on the wall with my empty eyes, something that I could hold on, but instead of the wall I saw through it.
A mirror of my memories slowly built in front of me. It showed me the stupid Yuya. The caring Kota. The eager Keito. My beloved Yuto. I was afraid since I never experienced something like this, but its fragile beauty was fascinating and I couldn’t tear my eyes away. Every time when I saw their faces, their happy expressions, a fragment of the glass broke off and sank into my chest to stab my heart, slowly and deep, becoming stronger and more painful with every laugh, every smile of the ones I will never see again, but still I couldn’t bring myself to avert my gaze.
A shade hid my face, my vision became blurry just like my understanding for a just world. The shadow pressured my heart, made it become heavier, slowed down my pulse. He brought me to the edge of unconsciousness which invited me with its carefreeness and calm. But my misty mind cleared a little when I heard something.
Dumbfounded I stared at Daiki. I heard him. But I couldn’t understand it yet since I was still in a mode of depression and resignation.
“Yuto.. Yuto saved your live” The name of my beloved boyfriend was like a candle lightening the darkness inside me. I opened my mouth. Luckily I still had the control over my muscles.
“Y-Yuto.. is he..” Deep inside at the bottom of my heart there was still a little hope. A part of my mind wanted to believe that Yuto will come here any time. That the doctors called him that I woke up after I don’t know how many days that passed. That he would hug me tight. He would cry and laught at the same time, telling me not to make him scared so much again. Yuto would make me promise to never ever leave him. A little part inside me believed that it was possible.
But my hope crushed when I saw Daiki nodding barely visible. Suddenly I felt something salty touching the corner of my lips. I lifted my hand to my face. A tear which was quickly followed by others.
I was shocked. I didn’t want to realize that I will never see Yuto again. Never hold his hand again. Never be hugged by him again. Never be kissed by him again. He’s gone. Forever.
“Ryo.. don’t cry” Daiki embraced my shivering body tightly. My hands grabbed the fabric of his shirt tightly when I cried even more.
“Ryo.. I’m sure Yuto wouldn’t want to see you crying now. He saved your live. He wants you to keep on smiling and never give up. Don’t waste the gift he gave to you” Daiki soothed me but he too couldn’t hold back his tears anymore. I know all of what he told me, but it doesn’t change the fact that Yuto moved from this world and left me behind, all alone. Nevertheless, I was very thankful. Didn’t this show just how much Yuto loved me? That he even gave his life for only me? That he said the truth when he told me I’m his one and only love forever?
“Thank you, Y-Yutti” I whispered. I felt like my heart will break just by saying his name.
“Thanks, Yuto, for saving Ryosuke” Daiki agreed.
“Thank you, Daiki” I said again, but I added “for not leaving me alone”
“I would never ever leave you alone, Ryo-chan”
I felt my self coming back to reality slowly. The shock left my body more and more and I was able to let out my emotions freely. I still don’t have any memories, but it wasn’t important to me now.
Suddenly my mind was filled with Daiki only. I realized how hard he struggled no to break in front of me, but instead to be there for me. The last thing I could hold onto. He only thought of me while I only thought of myself. I felt my face blushing of embarrassment. I wasn’t worth having a friend like Daiki who was so caring and selfless.
I opened my mouth again to say something, but a doctor came in without even knocking on the door and yelled at Daiki that the visiting time has ended already an hour ago. “How rude” Daiki whispered so that only I could hear it, but he silently he stood up, patted my head lovingly for the last time and left the room. Daiki wasn’t a friend of great words when it comes to leave-taking.
Even after he left, I felt that as long as I have Daiki by my side, maybe I will be able to manage Yuto’s death. But now the cold attacked my heart again and I continued crying silently.
Pairing: Yamajima, Ariyama
Genre: Angst, hc, (cd)
Rating: PG-13 to be safe
Author: Mi
A/N Yamajima again, nee~~ but it had to be Yamajima since out of all pairings I think they have the strongest emotional connection. There isn’t much Yamajima in this fic though. Mostly Ariyama. maa… This is kind of sad. A sad story. And I guess it will have a sequel since I have an idea for it already (or two, I’m not sure yet) :P Anyways, enjoy <3
[its fragile beauty was fascinating]„How is he?“
„He was really lucky - or maybe he simply acted right. He has severe injuries, but he obviously managed to protect his head with something. His state is steady and not critical anymore, so the chance that he’ll survive is very-“
A groan escaped my lips. The voices woke me up and immediately I was overwhelmed by several impressions. The pain in my head and my whole body exploded. I tried to open my eyes, but as soon as I my lids parted the brightness of the white ceiling burned into them. Everything was white, the walls, the furniture, the blanket on my bed. I thought I will become blind anytime.
My brain wasn’t able yet to remember where I was and why I was here, but I recognized the room as a hospital.
Even though it hurt like hell I turned my head slowly into the direction where I thought the voices came from. I couldn’t help but to be amazed by what I saw, not because there was a doctor like I supposed already, but also my best friend Daiki was there. Daiki’s face was dumbfounded, but his expression changed into relief quickly. He flashed a big smile to me and I tried to return it.
Suddenly my whole attention was occupied by the doctors and nurses that surrounded my bed. I was quite surprised, I didn’t notice them at all. Apparently my thoughts showed on my face again, like always, because I could see Daiki’s smirking face.
The doctors checked frantically the machines connected to my body, turned some off and some new ones on. The nurses chattered excitedly. I couldn’t follow their conversation, but the words they used the most were ‘impossible’ and ‘miracle’. One of the doctors took my blood with a syringe to have it analyzed. Unconsciously I shot him a death glare so that he would have died immediately.
Daiki held back a laugh. Seeing him struggling so hard made me grin widely. Daiki knew me better than anyone else. He would never let me down, only when the end of the world comes. Nah, not even then. He was the one that saved me when I was in trouble, he proved it more than just once that he would always be there for me.
Hastily the doctors and nurses left the room. One stayed behind and wrote some incomprehensible words onto the board in his hand, changed some words with Daiki, but then he followed the others and left me alone with Daiki.
“Ahh, Ryo.. What did you do again?” Daiki sighed. Irritated I looked into his face. His arms were crossed in front of his chest and he shook his head sarcastically.
“I didn’t do anything!” I defended myself, but my friend with his tongue-in-cheek talk just ignored me and sat next to me onto the bed.
“You are very lucky. Why didn’t you share it with the others?” he said. His voice was very serious which sent chills down my spine. He never talked seriously, only when something special happened. Daiki turned his head, unable to look at me.
“Daiki?”
“………”
“Daiki, what happened?” I said and now I noticed how broken my voice was. Like in slow motion he looked at me again. He opened his mouth to say something, but just closed it again. Something in his eyes made me feel bad.
“Ryo..” Daiki started, but he couldn’t end his sentence. “Do you know why you’re here?”
“No” I answered honestly. “We were on our way to a location shooting, but then my mind is blank” I was somehow afraid of what Daiki will tell me. I didn’t have any memory. The last thing I knew was me sitting in a little bus with Yuto, Yuya, Kota and Keito. The other members were in another bus. Yuto managed to persuade Hikaru to change seats with him because he wanted to sit next to me and not in the other bus. Not long ago he confessed to me. I was just too happy and never wanted to be parted from him so I was glad when Hikaru agreed. I guess he wanted to sit with Yuri rather than with me anyways.
“You know.. Ryo..” Daiki’s voice interrupted my thoughts. “There was an a-accident and.. and” Daiki’s voice trembled.
“Daiki?”
Daiki didn’t say anything. He tried to calm down, but I could see how his eyes started to sparkle and how he held back tears. Then he looked deep into my eyes and moved his lips. He formed a word with his mouth. I understood but I didn’t want to understand.
‘dead’
Dead. Dead. Dead? They are… dead? Yuya, Kota, Keito, Yuto. Dead? My friends and bandmates. My supporters and mood makers. My boyfriend. Dead?
Many thoughts simultaneously shot through my head like bullets of a pistol, they collapsed, mixed and built new structures without any sense. I felt like the time stopped while my heart was racing in a fast pace and the world disappeared piece by piece.
I fell into a black eternity, empty and cold, built by the loss of my dear friends and the hole in my heart.
I heard Daiki speaking to me, but I didn’t listen to him. I felt his hand touching my shoulder understanding and soothing, but my senses didn’t recognize it.
I became cold, so cold in this white hell I’m caged in. Slowly and painfully the cold crept through my veins, grabbed my lung with its icy claws and took my air to breath. I lost all my warmth, my body was like paralyzed. I tried to fix a spot on the wall with my empty eyes, something that I could hold on, but instead of the wall I saw through it.
A mirror of my memories slowly built in front of me. It showed me the stupid Yuya. The caring Kota. The eager Keito. My beloved Yuto. I was afraid since I never experienced something like this, but its fragile beauty was fascinating and I couldn’t tear my eyes away. Every time when I saw their faces, their happy expressions, a fragment of the glass broke off and sank into my chest to stab my heart, slowly and deep, becoming stronger and more painful with every laugh, every smile of the ones I will never see again, but still I couldn’t bring myself to avert my gaze.
A shade hid my face, my vision became blurry just like my understanding for a just world. The shadow pressured my heart, made it become heavier, slowed down my pulse. He brought me to the edge of unconsciousness which invited me with its carefreeness and calm. But my misty mind cleared a little when I heard something.
Dumbfounded I stared at Daiki. I heard him. But I couldn’t understand it yet since I was still in a mode of depression and resignation.
“Yuto.. Yuto saved your live” The name of my beloved boyfriend was like a candle lightening the darkness inside me. I opened my mouth. Luckily I still had the control over my muscles.
“Y-Yuto.. is he..” Deep inside at the bottom of my heart there was still a little hope. A part of my mind wanted to believe that Yuto will come here any time. That the doctors called him that I woke up after I don’t know how many days that passed. That he would hug me tight. He would cry and laught at the same time, telling me not to make him scared so much again. Yuto would make me promise to never ever leave him. A little part inside me believed that it was possible.
But my hope crushed when I saw Daiki nodding barely visible. Suddenly I felt something salty touching the corner of my lips. I lifted my hand to my face. A tear which was quickly followed by others.
I was shocked. I didn’t want to realize that I will never see Yuto again. Never hold his hand again. Never be hugged by him again. Never be kissed by him again. He’s gone. Forever.
“Ryo.. don’t cry” Daiki embraced my shivering body tightly. My hands grabbed the fabric of his shirt tightly when I cried even more.
“Ryo.. I’m sure Yuto wouldn’t want to see you crying now. He saved your live. He wants you to keep on smiling and never give up. Don’t waste the gift he gave to you” Daiki soothed me but he too couldn’t hold back his tears anymore. I know all of what he told me, but it doesn’t change the fact that Yuto moved from this world and left me behind, all alone. Nevertheless, I was very thankful. Didn’t this show just how much Yuto loved me? That he even gave his life for only me? That he said the truth when he told me I’m his one and only love forever?
“Thank you, Y-Yutti” I whispered. I felt like my heart will break just by saying his name.
“Thanks, Yuto, for saving Ryosuke” Daiki agreed.
“Thank you, Daiki” I said again, but I added “for not leaving me alone”
“I would never ever leave you alone, Ryo-chan”
I felt my self coming back to reality slowly. The shock left my body more and more and I was able to let out my emotions freely. I still don’t have any memories, but it wasn’t important to me now.
Suddenly my mind was filled with Daiki only. I realized how hard he struggled no to break in front of me, but instead to be there for me. The last thing I could hold onto. He only thought of me while I only thought of myself. I felt my face blushing of embarrassment. I wasn’t worth having a friend like Daiki who was so caring and selfless.
I opened my mouth again to say something, but a doctor came in without even knocking on the door and yelled at Daiki that the visiting time has ended already an hour ago. “How rude” Daiki whispered so that only I could hear it, but he silently he stood up, patted my head lovingly for the last time and left the room. Daiki wasn’t a friend of great words when it comes to leave-taking.
Even after he left, I felt that as long as I have Daiki by my side, maybe I will be able to manage Yuto’s death. But now the cold attacked my heart again and I continued crying silently.