Inevitable outtake: Useless (Micah POV)
Useless
An Inevitable missing scene
Disclaimer: Laurell K. Hamilton owns all things Anita Blake. JK Rowling owns all things Harry Potter. Inevitable is mine, however.
Rating: PG
Note: A birthday missing scene for sabriel_0405. Takes place in chapter 62, just after Nathaniel has stormed out of the room at the Circus, and Anita told Micah to go after him. Micah POV.
Spoilers: Contains the tiniest of spoilers from Micah, but if you haven't read the book, you won't get it so it's okay. And, of course, spoilers for Inevitable up to chapter 62.
~~*~~
After giving me a look I couldn't decipher, Micah left.
Anita, Chapter 62 of Inevitable
Micah headed down the stone halls toward Jason's room. That was where Nathaniel said he was going, and that was where Anita ordered him to go.
A few more steps, and Micah slowed. He couldn't walk in on Nathaniel when he was like this, he might say something... unfortunate.
Sorry I let you get mutilated by Olaf seemed like a bad way to start the conversation. Don't worry about it, I was as useless as protecting Anita as you were was even worse.
Micah leaned against one of the walls, closing his eyes against the artificial light. Fucking useless.
He'd had some bad shit happen to him and his people, but Chimera had never done anything as horrible, as insanely destructive, as what Olaf did to Nathaniel.
He ripped Nathaniel up and I wasn't there to protect him.
There were rules to being a Nimir-Raj, at least in Micah's head. You protected your people, took the pain and punishment for them, and destroyed anyone who dared to hurt them.
But Micah hadn't been able to stop Olaf. Edward had.
Micah hadn't been able to save Nathaniel. Anita and Richard had. Richard! The fucking Ulfric reached into Anita's barely conscious mind and dragged Nathaniel back from the brink of death, saved him, made him shift, saved his hand and his perfect body and everything.
All Micah could do was kneel in a pool of Olaf's blood and brains and hold Anita's arm, below her ruined hands, and wait for the ambulance to get there.
He'd taken Nathaniel to the shifter hospital, and had offered warmth and comfort, but the moment Nathaniel woke, terrified and incoherent, all the young man had wanted to do was rush to Anita's side. All Micah could do was find Nathaniel some clothes and put him in the car.
Useless.
He hadn't hardly slept the night before at the hospital for fear of missing something, of failing Anita and Nathaniel again. But Anita didn't turn to him, to anyone. She clung to the delusion that she was fine. Did she really not see the tremors in her hands? How wide and haunted her eyes were when she looked in the mirror?
And yet, Micah had left her alone in that stone room, to go find Nathaniel.
He couldn't do anything right, could he?
Anita shouldn't be alone. But Nathaniel needed... something. Micah knew that Nathaniel had experienced some horrible things under Gabriel, and after that, and that he had come through fine. What was different about this? Was it the damage? The fact that it was Olaf? That Anita had also been hurt? Nathaniel was an inch from the edge, and Micah didn't know what to do.
Still, Micah hesitated between going back to Anita, so she wouldn't be alone, and going to Nathaniel.
A Nimir-Raj shouldn't be like this! Micah told himself. I have to see to the well-being of my people; Nathaniel needs me more.
But how do I leave Anita by herself?
A presence came into Micah's consciousness, and he looked up to see Damian slowly coming down the hall. The vampire looked at him silently. Was that contempt in his eyes? Or was Micah imagining things?
"Damian."
"Micah."
"Are you busy?" Micah said, hitting on an idea. "Can you go see Anita?"
"That was my intention," Damian said flatly.
Right. Great. "Good, then."
Damian raised an eyebrow and walked past Micah. They lived in the same house, but Micah still didn't understand the vampire at all.
Micah pushed himself off the wall and continued down the hall to Jason's room. He also shared the house, and Anita's bed, with Nathaniel, but he understood Nathaniel. When he first moved into Anita's life, Nathaniel had been wary around him. After the stories Micah heard of Gabriel, what the bastard had done to Nathaniel, he didn't blame him.
Slowly, Nathaniel had started to trust Micah. And then something had happened, that even Micah didn't expect.
He became Nathaniel's friend.
He had failed that friendship, the protection he'd promised, when he'd let this happen to Nathaniel.
Useless.
Getting to Jason's door, Micah knocked. Jason opened the door almost immediately. "Micah!" he said, unable to hide the relief in his voice. "Good to see you."
"Is Nathaniel here?" Micah asked, unable to see into the room. The next moment, however, Micah caught Nathaniel's scent. The wereleopard had made it this far.
"He sure is," Jason swung the door open and let Micah inside. "We were just trying to decide what we were going to do."
"Is it okay if I hang out?" Micah asked. He finally spotted Nathaniel hunched in a chair, in the darkest corner of the room.
"Yeah," Nathaniel muttered. "You..." He looked up, suddenly panicked. "You didn't leave Anita along, right? She's safe?"
"Damian's with her," Micah said in a hurry. "She's fine."
Nathaniel's eyes were so full of conflicting emotions that Micah could only stare. Then Nathaniel lowered his head, his butchered hair swinging in front of his face.
Micah took a deep breath, and sent a prayer to the god he hadn't spoken to since his uncle and cousin had been killed by that wereleopard, so many years before. Don't let me fail them again.
First things first. He needed to calm Nathaniel down, try and help him relax, not obsess on what happened in the house. He needed something mindless and nothing to do with Anita or pain or blood. "How about some cards?" Micah suggested, ignoring the incredulous look on Jason's face.
Nathaniel stirred. "Could... could we play cribbage?" he asked slowly. "Jason's got a board."
"Sure," Micah said with a reassuring smile.
Jason looked between the wereleopards, then shrugged and went over to his bookcase. "I haven't played cribbage in a million years," Jason said, his voice washing over the room. As he spoke, Nathaniel visibly relaxed. "My grandfather used to play it all the time. My mother hated it, which I suppose is why I still have the board. Here we go."
This may work, Micah thought as Nathaniel crept over to the bed to sit. He still held his hand clenched against his chest, and he wouldn't look up, but it was progress.
Anita was calmer, was healing, and soon, maybe, she'd open up to him instead of holding everything inside.
Micah may have failed them before, but never again.
No matter what.
--fin
An Inevitable missing scene
Disclaimer: Laurell K. Hamilton owns all things Anita Blake. JK Rowling owns all things Harry Potter. Inevitable is mine, however.
Rating: PG
Note: A birthday missing scene for sabriel_0405. Takes place in chapter 62, just after Nathaniel has stormed out of the room at the Circus, and Anita told Micah to go after him. Micah POV.
Spoilers: Contains the tiniest of spoilers from Micah, but if you haven't read the book, you won't get it so it's okay. And, of course, spoilers for Inevitable up to chapter 62.
~~*~~
After giving me a look I couldn't decipher, Micah left.
Anita, Chapter 62 of Inevitable
Micah headed down the stone halls toward Jason's room. That was where Nathaniel said he was going, and that was where Anita ordered him to go.
A few more steps, and Micah slowed. He couldn't walk in on Nathaniel when he was like this, he might say something... unfortunate.
Sorry I let you get mutilated by Olaf seemed like a bad way to start the conversation. Don't worry about it, I was as useless as protecting Anita as you were was even worse.
Micah leaned against one of the walls, closing his eyes against the artificial light. Fucking useless.
He'd had some bad shit happen to him and his people, but Chimera had never done anything as horrible, as insanely destructive, as what Olaf did to Nathaniel.
He ripped Nathaniel up and I wasn't there to protect him.
There were rules to being a Nimir-Raj, at least in Micah's head. You protected your people, took the pain and punishment for them, and destroyed anyone who dared to hurt them.
But Micah hadn't been able to stop Olaf. Edward had.
Micah hadn't been able to save Nathaniel. Anita and Richard had. Richard! The fucking Ulfric reached into Anita's barely conscious mind and dragged Nathaniel back from the brink of death, saved him, made him shift, saved his hand and his perfect body and everything.
All Micah could do was kneel in a pool of Olaf's blood and brains and hold Anita's arm, below her ruined hands, and wait for the ambulance to get there.
He'd taken Nathaniel to the shifter hospital, and had offered warmth and comfort, but the moment Nathaniel woke, terrified and incoherent, all the young man had wanted to do was rush to Anita's side. All Micah could do was find Nathaniel some clothes and put him in the car.
Useless.
He hadn't hardly slept the night before at the hospital for fear of missing something, of failing Anita and Nathaniel again. But Anita didn't turn to him, to anyone. She clung to the delusion that she was fine. Did she really not see the tremors in her hands? How wide and haunted her eyes were when she looked in the mirror?
And yet, Micah had left her alone in that stone room, to go find Nathaniel.
He couldn't do anything right, could he?
Anita shouldn't be alone. But Nathaniel needed... something. Micah knew that Nathaniel had experienced some horrible things under Gabriel, and after that, and that he had come through fine. What was different about this? Was it the damage? The fact that it was Olaf? That Anita had also been hurt? Nathaniel was an inch from the edge, and Micah didn't know what to do.
Still, Micah hesitated between going back to Anita, so she wouldn't be alone, and going to Nathaniel.
A Nimir-Raj shouldn't be like this! Micah told himself. I have to see to the well-being of my people; Nathaniel needs me more.
But how do I leave Anita by herself?
A presence came into Micah's consciousness, and he looked up to see Damian slowly coming down the hall. The vampire looked at him silently. Was that contempt in his eyes? Or was Micah imagining things?
"Damian."
"Micah."
"Are you busy?" Micah said, hitting on an idea. "Can you go see Anita?"
"That was my intention," Damian said flatly.
Right. Great. "Good, then."
Damian raised an eyebrow and walked past Micah. They lived in the same house, but Micah still didn't understand the vampire at all.
Micah pushed himself off the wall and continued down the hall to Jason's room. He also shared the house, and Anita's bed, with Nathaniel, but he understood Nathaniel. When he first moved into Anita's life, Nathaniel had been wary around him. After the stories Micah heard of Gabriel, what the bastard had done to Nathaniel, he didn't blame him.
Slowly, Nathaniel had started to trust Micah. And then something had happened, that even Micah didn't expect.
He became Nathaniel's friend.
He had failed that friendship, the protection he'd promised, when he'd let this happen to Nathaniel.
Useless.
Getting to Jason's door, Micah knocked. Jason opened the door almost immediately. "Micah!" he said, unable to hide the relief in his voice. "Good to see you."
"Is Nathaniel here?" Micah asked, unable to see into the room. The next moment, however, Micah caught Nathaniel's scent. The wereleopard had made it this far.
"He sure is," Jason swung the door open and let Micah inside. "We were just trying to decide what we were going to do."
"Is it okay if I hang out?" Micah asked. He finally spotted Nathaniel hunched in a chair, in the darkest corner of the room.
"Yeah," Nathaniel muttered. "You..." He looked up, suddenly panicked. "You didn't leave Anita along, right? She's safe?"
"Damian's with her," Micah said in a hurry. "She's fine."
Nathaniel's eyes were so full of conflicting emotions that Micah could only stare. Then Nathaniel lowered his head, his butchered hair swinging in front of his face.
Micah took a deep breath, and sent a prayer to the god he hadn't spoken to since his uncle and cousin had been killed by that wereleopard, so many years before. Don't let me fail them again.
First things first. He needed to calm Nathaniel down, try and help him relax, not obsess on what happened in the house. He needed something mindless and nothing to do with Anita or pain or blood. "How about some cards?" Micah suggested, ignoring the incredulous look on Jason's face.
Nathaniel stirred. "Could... could we play cribbage?" he asked slowly. "Jason's got a board."
"Sure," Micah said with a reassuring smile.
Jason looked between the wereleopards, then shrugged and went over to his bookcase. "I haven't played cribbage in a million years," Jason said, his voice washing over the room. As he spoke, Nathaniel visibly relaxed. "My grandfather used to play it all the time. My mother hated it, which I suppose is why I still have the board. Here we go."
This may work, Micah thought as Nathaniel crept over to the bed to sit. He still held his hand clenched against his chest, and he wouldn't look up, but it was progress.
Anita was calmer, was healing, and soon, maybe, she'd open up to him instead of holding everything inside.
Micah may have failed them before, but never again.
No matter what.
--fin