With regard to gender identity, I suspect it's much easier for a man to not worry about it too much, because of the tendency our society still has to regard maleness as generic: a man is just a person but a woman is a person with femininity. It's one kind of male privilege.
The other side of the coin is that little boys are under much more pressure to avoid girlish things than the reverse. I do remember resenting that a little, though I had no objection to identifying as male.
I'm kind of a "manly girl" if that's really even a thing. Part of it is my size--I'm 6 feet tall and a nice healthy weight, so I don't have that girly demeanor. I've never really felt like the tiny girls I see, decked out in makeup and cute little miniskirts and stuff. But I've always been ok with that...it's just who I am, and I'm comfortable in my own skin.
I have so much I want to say about this, but I'm not sure I could ever get any of it across in an LJ comment. I will say that I really empathize with this. Sexual orientation does not equal gender. Gender does not equal sex. And so on. And I will never really understand why any of those things are so important to people. It's as bizarre to me as equating someone with what sort of car they drive. I am not my Mazda. Nor am I my orientation. And I am certainly not my sex. And my gender? Well, I think those that know me at all pick up on the fact that I'm not a girly girl pretty damn quick.
You may find this interesting. Don't let them fool ya. We aren't binary. I know I'm not. And somehow, from what you've said, I don't think you are either.
And off topic: I'm so glad to see you happy these days. You seem to have really found yourself and your path. It's inspiring and a joy to watch. As always, I send you much love.
Known you for a while......ext_654009June 9 2011, 04:23:44 UTC
and never even thought about it. I met you as Mez, and had a ton of fun wondering what color your hair was going to be each time I saw you.
I don't ask anyone about orientation due to one reason: I don't care. It doesn't concern me, unless it concerns the person who I'm speaking with, and if it does concern that person, I'm sure he/she will bring it up soon enough.
Very interesting "article" you write, it's one I haven't read before. I wish you didn't have to put up with ignorant people, but we all do. Some are ignorant about non-important issues, others are just rude about it.
Keep being Mez, though, as you have some really good friends who just don't give a shit about immaterial items such as the above. I'm just happy to call you my friend, even though you were so damn selfish to move away. jk :)
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The other side of the coin is that little boys are under much more pressure to avoid girlish things than the reverse. I do remember resenting that a little, though I had no objection to identifying as male.
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You may find this interesting. Don't let them fool ya. We aren't binary. I know I'm not. And somehow, from what you've said, I don't think you are either.
And off topic: I'm so glad to see you happy these days. You seem to have really found yourself and your path. It's inspiring and a joy to watch. As always, I send you much love.
Reply
I don't ask anyone about orientation due to one reason: I don't care. It doesn't concern me, unless it concerns the person who I'm speaking with, and if it does concern that person, I'm sure he/she will bring it up soon enough.
Very interesting "article" you write, it's one I haven't read before. I wish you didn't have to put up with ignorant people, but we all do. Some are ignorant about non-important issues, others are just rude about it.
Keep being Mez, though, as you have some really good friends who just don't give a shit about immaterial items such as the above. I'm just happy to call you my friend, even though you were so damn selfish to move away. jk :)
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Every time I think you could not rock harder, you prove me wrong.
Love, Chip.
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