Fic: A World Deformed

[methylethyl]

Title: A World Deformed
Author: methylethyl 
Rating: R
Summary: Sometimes, Justin thinks that maybe, somewhere along the way, Brian became one of those pieces of the normal world that he's infected, cut out and chained to his little fucked-up world. He doesn't know if it's a nightmare or a fantasy. 
Author's Notes: An exploration into Justin's transition from

Comments

[mander3_swish]

This is marvelous! I love the way you've captured how Justin could have felt about his art and how it has changed and evolved in relation to how he sees and feels the world around him.
...and that Brian wants to get in his head 'just once' in order to understand Justin better :)
Justin is so melancholy in this...I just want to give him a hug!

[mander3_swish]

oh, PS. what poem was it that prompted you to write this? i wouldn't mind checking that out...

[methylethyl]

Thank you! I know that Justin isn't generally an angsty person, but when you look at his art in seasons two through five, it's just so dark. It's a sharp contrast to his art in season one, which is just plain, honest sketching. His art gains depth after the bashing.

I was inspired by the poem The Idea of Order at Key West, by Wallace Stevens. Particularly, these lines:

She was the single artificer of the world
In which she sang. And when she sang, the sea,
Whatever self it had, became the self
That was her song, for she was the maker.
Then we, As we beheld her striding there alone,
Knew that there never was a world for her
Except the one she sang and, singing, made.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, and for the lovely comment. I always appreciate feedback!

[rainbow1907]

Wow, that was wonderfully put into words. Many thanks! Rena :)

[methylethyl]

You're welcome--and thank you for commenting!

[fancypantsdylan]

This brings it home to me how fucked up the bashing made Justin and that's really sad, but then there's Brian that small spark from the 'normal world' and I know whatever else Justin feels about his 'fucked-up world' Brian will always be there for him.
Beautiful and very introspective, loved it :)

[methylethyl]

Brian is his small spark of normal, isn't he? *g*

I think that, even though Justin does recover physically and mentally from the bashing in canon (and usually in fanon), his art is incredibly affected by it through all the seasons. And yes, it's angry and dark, but it also gains so much depth.

Thank you so much for reading and taking the time to comment. I really, really love hearing what people think!

[methylethyl]

Thank you! I'm glad to fulfill your fantasy. *g*

[shenova]

Sad Justin is a tortured artist and he was trying to explain this to Brian in the best way he could.

[methylethyl]

Yes, he was trying to explain, and I think Brian got it... a little bit. In the special way that he always understands Justin, even if he doesn't quite know what to do with that understanding.