Comments | metamorfic_moon: Serpents, Chapter Six

mrstater in metamorfic_moon

Serpents, Chapter Six

Jul 19, 2007 20:35

Title: Serpents (6/6 + Epilogue)
Author: MrsTater
Rating & Warnings: R for sexuality
Prompts: weakness; "In the light of Voldemort's return, we are only as strong as we are united, as weak as we are divided."
Word Count: 6828 words
Summary: Two years into a relationship with Remus, and the correct way to deal with full moons continues to elude Tonks ( Read more... )

romance, mrstater, last chance full moon showdown, angst, drama

Comments 14

anonymous July 20 2007, 02:17:44 UTC

Oh, this is heartbreaking. Which means as a writer you're doing a great job at describing what Tonks is going through.I hope for a very happy epilogue.

mrstater July 20 2007, 21:31:47 UTC

Thank you so much! I take it as a very high compliment that you feel this piece captured the emotions of the characters in this situation. I've posted the Epilogue in my personal journal, linked through this chapter. I hope it's happy enough for you! :)

hrymfaxe July 20 2007, 14:19:59 UTC

I have just read chapters 5 and 6 - phew what a rollercoster ride! I'm reading from work (don't tell...) and chapter 5 certainly took my mind far far away from where it should be (a giftwrapped Tonks, lol, and the things that happens after.. Hmmm, hot stuff!) I really love it, though this chapter is not a happy one, and we all like to see Remus smiling.. Their quarrel is awful and terrible = very well-written. I like that Remus is not completely meek and an apology for himself. I will go and see if you have posted the epilogue yet, in the hopes that it has a happier ending! Oh and can I please have a drink with the Weasley twins - I might need cheering up! :)

mrstater July 20 2007, 21:36:04 UTC

The emotional rollercoaster was a bit draining for me to write, and it's always so difficult to know whether the emotions are conveyed to the readers who aren't in my head, so I'm just thrilled to know you felt taken along for the ride. To know that you felt the love and happiness in chapter five as well as the awfulness of the quarrel in chapter six is just the best compliment I could hope for. And maybe you're home from work now and don't have to be sneaky, but I've posted the epilogue. :)

Thank you very much for your lovely comments. I truly appreciate you reading so thoughtfully.

lady_bracknell July 20 2007, 16:25:35 UTC

I think I said this at some point during TH, but: I love it when you make them fight ( ... )

mrstater July 20 2007, 21:46:05 UTC

Am I a terrible R/T shipper if I admit to really love writing them fight? It's not an easy thing to do, and sitting down and just writing this in one go like I did yesterday made it even more difficult, but I think it explores the characters in a way that romance and happiness don't, because it really plumbs their deeper sides. I'm so, so very pleased you think it's realistic and that it works when they play very dirty. I'm always afraid that I'm just pushing OOC with taking them to the edge of their negative emotions...But I'll fear no more if you think it works ( ... )

gilpin25 July 24 2007, 17:34:05 UTC

I must admit I do enjoy a good R/T quarrel and this is an absolute cracker. As well as one that's been coming on for about five chapters, lol.

Seriously, I also love it when I'm so absorbed in what's going on that I want to yell at the characters, "Don't say that!" or "That is the worst possible thing you could say at that point, dear!" ladybracknell has already mentioned how they both play dirty, getting right to each other's weak spots, even though they don't really intend to go there at all. But isn't that exactly what happens in quarrels, how they esculate, before you're even quite aware what's happening ( ... )

mrstater July 25 2007, 11:19:45 UTC

And to make up for my tardiness with Ch. 5's reply, I do Ch. 6 on the day you left it. Of course, LJ's gone down, and I'm having to do this in Word and paste when it's back, so I might be thwarted!

Thank you so much for your feedback! I'm always so nervous about writing fights, though I do really love how quickly they happen and how you can step back from the internal monologue and just let them ping-pong rapid-fire at each other (in fact, that's probably the only saving grace that allowed me to get this done in a day, lol), not thinking about what they're saying or how it will land on the other's ears. I'm really delighted you feel the fic had been building to this point and that it felt realistic and caught you up in it!

It seems to me that he thinks the quarrel is all about him making her unhappy, while she's thinking she hasn't made him happy enough to want to marry her, and out of everything they do say to each other, that's the one crucial thing they don't.Which is rather the crux of the whole R/T dilemma, isn't it? I ( ... )

phe_o July 29 2007, 03:33:31 UTC

Double gah!! On to the epilogue, quickly! ...