(Untitled)

[molly_coddles]

Title: In Bed
Author:

Comments

[lady_bracknell]

I really love this. I love the running theme of in bed, and how the narrative steps back a bit from all these tiny snippets and lets the story tell itself, the reader make the connections. I thought the parts about Sirius and Remus' gradual pulling away were the most successful, but the opening is really lovely, and nicely sets the scene for what's to come, giving them something to lose.

This is a really great little fic which packs a lot of emotional punch. I know how hard it is when you're mostly known for humour to turn all of that off and write about emotion - but I think humour writers are often best at that, and here you've rather proved my point :).

[molly_coddles]

Thank you!
I lose enthusiasm for writing in this vein very quickly, so I'm glad you think it works as a short piece.

Thanks for reading and for leaving such lovely comments!

[kerrymdb]

When he does, she curls against his back, aching to reach him more than physically.
I really like that line. Such a greeat way to show all the underlying issues, not just with them, but with everything around them.

The whole piece is wonderful. The variety of emotions that Tonks runs through are shown so well. And I love the extra details about the littlest werewolf!

Wonderful job! :)

[molly_coddles]

Thanks for urging me to add those little werewolf details! I tend to shy away from writing small children into my fics because it's just too close to home. I know I didn't answer all the questions you asked, but I tried to hit a couple. Baby steps. Angst and children in a fic was really pushing it for me. ;)

Thanks for reading (again!) and for the constructive comments! :D

[iamstarmom]

This one grabs you by the throat from the very start and doesn't let go until the end. Wow. Beautifully rendered, Mollycoddles! I love the economy of writing in the vignettes and how they build to the end. I was confused by the age of the little one and then the girl in the bath, 'years later' who says she's two. Is she another child?

Anyway, nicely done!!!

[molly_coddles]

Thank you!
Sorry for the confusion, it was supposed to read that there would soon be two children. Thanks for pointing that out, I think I made it a bit clearer now.
Thanks for reading and reviewing!

[anoipua]

This really is great. I love that the story spans such a long period of time in such a short fic, it could have taken chapters to tell this, but you perfected it in just a handful of words. It means we get the important parts, and the rest are just details, but your details never fall into the periphery, and it flows beautifully.

I really hope that all makes sense...

Bravo!

[molly_coddles]

Thank you!
I wasn't sure if this would come across as too sketchy or not, so I'm glad you thought it worked like this!
Thanks for reading and commenting!

[codenamelily]

This was just so wonderful =) Great job!

[molly_coddles]

I'm so glad (relieved!) to hear you liked it!
Thank you for reading and commenting!