tearcreek's gift for ego_chan
Merry Christmas, ego_chan. Hope it's vaguely what you wanted.
Mods, this has fic as part of it, so I'm putting both headers up, except where they repeat prompts. Hope this is okay.
Title: Gaius' Dance!Party Mix CD
Character/Pairing: Gaius, Merlin, Anhora, Geoffrey
Number of songs: Twelve
File format: .zip
Warnings & notes: It's cracky. Brain bleach may be needed. Sorry, but there was no other way around it. Contains fic, header below:
Rating: PG for Gaius' bum wiggling.
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be.
Summary: Gaius put the earbuds of his iPod into his ears and started breaking pots, breaking dishes, breaking DOOOOOOOOOOOOWN. And started singing.
Cover art too large, under the cut!
.zip @ megaupload
Gaius put the earbuds of his iPod into his ears and started breaking pots, breaking dishes, breaking DOOOOOOOOOOOOWN. And started singing:
1. Get the Party Started - P!nk
I'm coming up so you better get this party started.
I'm coming up so you better get this party started.
Get the party started on a Saturday night.
Everybody's waiting for me to arrive
Sending out the message to all of my friends
We'll be looking flashy in my Mercedes Benz
I got lots of style check my gold diamond rings
I can go miles if you know what I mean
2. Dance Commander - Electric Six
It would be awesome if we could dance-a
It would be awesome, yeah
Let's take a chance-a
It would be awesome, yeah
Let's start the show
Because you never know,
You never know
You never know until you go
'Gaius, Arthur said to tell you that the King needed-'
Merlin burst through the door, staring wide-eyed as Gaius's head... bopped. Up, down, side to side and back again, along with an unheard beat. He looked around the room, looking for some kind of sound he couldn't hear himself and came up empty.
And just then, with his eyes still closed, Gaius started singing and everything got much worse.
3. Too Sexy For My Shirt - Right Said Fred
I'm too sexy for my shirt,
Too sexy for my shirt,
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan, too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
And I'm too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party
No way I'm disco dancing.
And Gaius started lifting the hem of his robe. It was that moment that made the decision for Merlin. Whether it was his muscles, his brain or his magic (or all three at once) that propelled him toward the door, he didn't know. All he knew is that he needed to get out of there.
(This is simply because Gaius is too awesome for any other outcome.)
Merlin ran down the halls, down numerous flights of stairs and into more than three sqwarking maids who screamed back at his flailing limbs as he blindly propelled himself further down the passage with only a few loud 'sorry- I, sorry!'s.
It was another few flights before he found his intended - Geoffrey, the librarian.
'Geoffrey,' he panted, swallowing back unmanly ragged gasps. 'It's Gaius. You need to, you-'
'Slow down boy,' Geoffrey snapped, putting a heavy tome down on a table. 'Now what's wrong with Gaius?'
'Urk,' Merlin replied concisely. Geoffrey just blinked. Merlin tried shaping the words with his hands, and finding it impossible (wild flailings couldn't quite convey the horrors he'd witnessed) he said simply, 'you're going to have to see it for yourself.'
Meanwhile, Gaius was busy dancing along to another song...
4. When The Sun Goes Down - Arctic Monkeys
I know he must be up to sommink'
What are the chances sure it's more than likely
I've got a feeling in my stomach
I start to wonder what his story might be what his story might be yeah
They said it changes when the sun goes down
They said it changes when the sun goes down
They said it changes when the sun goes down
Around here.
...and chuckling softly to himself.
INTERLUDE (while Merlin gets Geoffrey's old bones up many many flights of stairs with many cries of 'Oh come on, I'm worried,' and 'Young people, always in such a hurry,' and silence then 'I saw that, young man. I know what that sign means.' Which is surprisingly (and not at all pre-set) coincidental considering that Gaius is currently listening to-)
5. Razor Face - Elton John
Has anybody here seen Razor Face?
Heard he's back, looking for a place to lay down
Must be getting on
Needs a man who's young to walk him around
Needs a man who's young to walk him around
6. Where is the Love - Black Eyed Peas
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah
Madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all, y'all
People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek
Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love
The love, the love
Finally, finally, Merlin got Geoffrey, wheezing and still muttering about the haste of young people and that Merlin could have just explained and everything would have been so much easier (while Merlin ignored him), they got him up to the physicians chambers. He knew that Geoffrey would understand as soon as they went through the door.
Sure enough, Gaius was bent down, almost to the floor, and just about to start singing. Merlin clamped his hands over his ears, but Geoffrey was just staring.
7. Low - Flo Rida ft. T-Pain
Shawty had them apple bottomed jeans, boots with the fur
the whole club was looking at her
she hit the floor, (she hit the floor)
next thing you know shawty got low low low low low low low
Geoffrey's mouth dropped open. He ventured forth, darting a glance at Merlin. Merlin nodded his encouragement from behind the table, protected by the metal rabbit mask.
He tapped Gaius on the shoulder as he was coming up from one of his 'low' moments, and Gaius started, fumbling for a silver-y item and tapping at it furiously.
'Geoffrey?' he asked. 'Merlin?' He grinned. Merlin knew that grin. It came very rarely. He was terrified of it.
'Gaius,' Geoffrey ventured tentatively. 'Are you feeling well?'
Gaius just waved his hand away. 'It is called an 'iPod touch'' he explained. He pulled the end of the winding cords that were hanging from his ears from the silver object and tapped at the thing again. It started playing.
8. We Are the Champions - Queen
I've paid my dues -
Time after time -
I've done my sentence
But committed no crime -
And bad mistakes
I've made a few
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face -
But I've come through
We are the champions - my friends
And we'll keep on fighting - till the end -
We are the champions -
We are the champions
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions - of the world -
Instead of the look of horror which Merlin had been expecting - hoping for, even, Geoffrey just smiled. The song finished with a soft click, and the opening strains of another song started.
'Does it re-play those songs?' Geoffrey asked curiously, and Gaius nodded enthusiastically.
'It does indeed.'
After a few more renditions of a song which consisted greatly of the words 'we are the champions, my friends', Merlin was beginning to feel slightly seasick from all the light swaying and waving the two men was doing, and promptly turned on his heel and left the room.
Arthur's stables (and now growing wrath at being left alone for such a great length of time) were much, much better than this.
The GAIUS&GEOFFREY BREAK IT DOWN interlude:
9. Woo Hoo - Blur
I got my head done
When i was young
It's not my problem
It's not my problem
Woo hoo
When I feel heavy metal
Woo hoo
And I'm pins and I'm needles
Woo hoo
Well I lie and I'm easy
All of the time
But I'm never sure why
I need you
Pleased to meet you yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Oh yeah
10. Should I Stay or Should I Go - The Clash.
Darling you gotta let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
If you say that you are mine
I'll be here until the end of time
So you got to let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
When Merlin came back that night, he edged cautiously around the room, avoiding the near vicinity of the humming Gaius that was currently preparing the dinner table. The cooking box buzzed hungrily in the corner.
'Merlin,' Gaius called, and Merlin froze like a deer with a bow pointed straight at it.
'Yes?' he replied weakly, eyes darting to the exit.
'I just want to tell you-'
11. I Get Knocked Down - Chumbawamba
We'll be singing
When we're winning
We'll be singing
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
'...good?' Merlin answered hopefully.
'Yes, good,' Gaius replied, pulling the funny shaped objects from his ears. 'Now are you ready for dinner?' And with that, he pulled a curry dish from the microwave box.
'...thanks,' Merlin replied, still slightly hesitant. But Gaius seemed to have been parted momentarily from the 'iPod touch' object, and Merlin wasn't going to start complaining. So he sat down across from Gaius and dug quickly in.
It wasn't until much later, when Merlin had spent far too long uninterrupted for it to actually have been possible, that he got suspicious.
Tentatively, he opened the door of his room to find not just Geoffrey but the unicorn keeper Anhora surrounding Gaius and the shiny silver object which was now blaring an annoying (if quite catchy) almost metallic noise. He decided it was quite like the noise a bucket made when you dropped it on the ground repeatedly.
And then they started dancing. In a line. Together. Choreographed.
12. Macarena - Los Del Rio
When I dance they call me Macarena
And the boys they say que so buena
They all want me, they can't have me
So they all come and dance beside me
Move with me, chat with me
And if you're good, I take you home with me
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Heeeeey Macarena
Aii!
The jaw of Merlin's mouth had never fallen down so low. They were dancing in some sort of order to the beat and then they... wiggled. And jumped. But all Merlin could focus on was the wiggling appendages at the rear of each man.
His jaw fell shut with a click.
'Urk,' he said for the second time that day.
'Merlin,' Gaius said, welcoming. 'Come join us.'
'N-no,' Merlin replied hastily. 'Thanks, I have to-' but his arm had been snagged by Anhora and he was dragged into line just as Geoffrey set the song back to repeat itself.
'Urk,' he said again, firmly. But when it came down to it, he ended up enjoying himself.
THE END.
(And a refrain from I Get Knocked Down, because it is necessary, to get the Macarena out of your head.)
I Get Knocked Down - Chumbawamba
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
If a different file format or upload site is needed, feel free to tell me!
Comments are loooooooooooooooooooved.
Mods, this has fic as part of it, so I'm putting both headers up, except where they repeat prompts. Hope this is okay.
Title: Gaius' Dance!Party Mix CD
Character/Pairing: Gaius, Merlin, Anhora, Geoffrey
Number of songs: Twelve
File format: .zip
Warnings & notes: It's cracky. Brain bleach may be needed. Sorry, but there was no other way around it. Contains fic, header below:
Rating: PG for Gaius' bum wiggling.
Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be.
Summary: Gaius put the earbuds of his iPod into his ears and started breaking pots, breaking dishes, breaking DOOOOOOOOOOOOWN. And started singing.
Cover art too large, under the cut!
.zip @ megaupload
Gaius put the earbuds of his iPod into his ears and started breaking pots, breaking dishes, breaking DOOOOOOOOOOOOWN. And started singing:
1. Get the Party Started - P!nk
I'm coming up so you better get this party started.
I'm coming up so you better get this party started.
Get the party started on a Saturday night.
Everybody's waiting for me to arrive
Sending out the message to all of my friends
We'll be looking flashy in my Mercedes Benz
I got lots of style check my gold diamond rings
I can go miles if you know what I mean
2. Dance Commander - Electric Six
It would be awesome if we could dance-a
It would be awesome, yeah
Let's take a chance-a
It would be awesome, yeah
Let's start the show
Because you never know,
You never know
You never know until you go
'Gaius, Arthur said to tell you that the King needed-'
Merlin burst through the door, staring wide-eyed as Gaius's head... bopped. Up, down, side to side and back again, along with an unheard beat. He looked around the room, looking for some kind of sound he couldn't hear himself and came up empty.
And just then, with his eyes still closed, Gaius started singing and everything got much worse.
3. Too Sexy For My Shirt - Right Said Fred
I'm too sexy for my shirt,
Too sexy for my shirt,
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan, too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
And I'm too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party
No way I'm disco dancing.
And Gaius started lifting the hem of his robe. It was that moment that made the decision for Merlin. Whether it was his muscles, his brain or his magic (or all three at once) that propelled him toward the door, he didn't know. All he knew is that he needed to get out of there.
(This is simply because Gaius is too awesome for any other outcome.)
Merlin ran down the halls, down numerous flights of stairs and into more than three sqwarking maids who screamed back at his flailing limbs as he blindly propelled himself further down the passage with only a few loud 'sorry- I, sorry!'s.
It was another few flights before he found his intended - Geoffrey, the librarian.
'Geoffrey,' he panted, swallowing back unmanly ragged gasps. 'It's Gaius. You need to, you-'
'Slow down boy,' Geoffrey snapped, putting a heavy tome down on a table. 'Now what's wrong with Gaius?'
'Urk,' Merlin replied concisely. Geoffrey just blinked. Merlin tried shaping the words with his hands, and finding it impossible (wild flailings couldn't quite convey the horrors he'd witnessed) he said simply, 'you're going to have to see it for yourself.'
Meanwhile, Gaius was busy dancing along to another song...
4. When The Sun Goes Down - Arctic Monkeys
I know he must be up to sommink'
What are the chances sure it's more than likely
I've got a feeling in my stomach
I start to wonder what his story might be what his story might be yeah
They said it changes when the sun goes down
They said it changes when the sun goes down
They said it changes when the sun goes down
Around here.
...and chuckling softly to himself.
INTERLUDE (while Merlin gets Geoffrey's old bones up many many flights of stairs with many cries of 'Oh come on, I'm worried,' and 'Young people, always in such a hurry,' and silence then 'I saw that, young man. I know what that sign means.' Which is surprisingly (and not at all pre-set) coincidental considering that Gaius is currently listening to-)
5. Razor Face - Elton John
Has anybody here seen Razor Face?
Heard he's back, looking for a place to lay down
Must be getting on
Needs a man who's young to walk him around
Needs a man who's young to walk him around
6. Where is the Love - Black Eyed Peas
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And when you hate then you're bound to get irate, yeah
Madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
Man, you gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love, y'all, y'all
People killin', people dyin'
Children hurt and you hear them cryin'
Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek
Father, Father, Father help us
Send some guidance from above
'Cause people got me, got me questionin'
Where is the love (Love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love (The love)
Where is the love
The love, the love
Finally, finally, Merlin got Geoffrey, wheezing and still muttering about the haste of young people and that Merlin could have just explained and everything would have been so much easier (while Merlin ignored him), they got him up to the physicians chambers. He knew that Geoffrey would understand as soon as they went through the door.
Sure enough, Gaius was bent down, almost to the floor, and just about to start singing. Merlin clamped his hands over his ears, but Geoffrey was just staring.
7. Low - Flo Rida ft. T-Pain
Shawty had them apple bottomed jeans, boots with the fur
the whole club was looking at her
she hit the floor, (she hit the floor)
next thing you know shawty got low low low low low low low
Geoffrey's mouth dropped open. He ventured forth, darting a glance at Merlin. Merlin nodded his encouragement from behind the table, protected by the metal rabbit mask.
He tapped Gaius on the shoulder as he was coming up from one of his 'low' moments, and Gaius started, fumbling for a silver-y item and tapping at it furiously.
'Geoffrey?' he asked. 'Merlin?' He grinned. Merlin knew that grin. It came very rarely. He was terrified of it.
'Gaius,' Geoffrey ventured tentatively. 'Are you feeling well?'
Gaius just waved his hand away. 'It is called an 'iPod touch'' he explained. He pulled the end of the winding cords that were hanging from his ears from the silver object and tapped at the thing again. It started playing.
8. We Are the Champions - Queen
I've paid my dues -
Time after time -
I've done my sentence
But committed no crime -
And bad mistakes
I've made a few
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face -
But I've come through
We are the champions - my friends
And we'll keep on fighting - till the end -
We are the champions -
We are the champions
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions - of the world -
Instead of the look of horror which Merlin had been expecting - hoping for, even, Geoffrey just smiled. The song finished with a soft click, and the opening strains of another song started.
'Does it re-play those songs?' Geoffrey asked curiously, and Gaius nodded enthusiastically.
'It does indeed.'
After a few more renditions of a song which consisted greatly of the words 'we are the champions, my friends', Merlin was beginning to feel slightly seasick from all the light swaying and waving the two men was doing, and promptly turned on his heel and left the room.
Arthur's stables (and now growing wrath at being left alone for such a great length of time) were much, much better than this.
The GAIUS&GEOFFREY BREAK IT DOWN interlude:
9. Woo Hoo - Blur
I got my head done
When i was young
It's not my problem
It's not my problem
Woo hoo
When I feel heavy metal
Woo hoo
And I'm pins and I'm needles
Woo hoo
Well I lie and I'm easy
All of the time
But I'm never sure why
I need you
Pleased to meet you yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah yeah
Oh yeah
10. Should I Stay or Should I Go - The Clash.
Darling you gotta let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
If you say that you are mine
I'll be here until the end of time
So you got to let me know
Should I stay or should I go?
When Merlin came back that night, he edged cautiously around the room, avoiding the near vicinity of the humming Gaius that was currently preparing the dinner table. The cooking box buzzed hungrily in the corner.
'Merlin,' Gaius called, and Merlin froze like a deer with a bow pointed straight at it.
'Yes?' he replied weakly, eyes darting to the exit.
'I just want to tell you-'
11. I Get Knocked Down - Chumbawamba
We'll be singing
When we're winning
We'll be singing
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
'...good?' Merlin answered hopefully.
'Yes, good,' Gaius replied, pulling the funny shaped objects from his ears. 'Now are you ready for dinner?' And with that, he pulled a curry dish from the microwave box.
'...thanks,' Merlin replied, still slightly hesitant. But Gaius seemed to have been parted momentarily from the 'iPod touch' object, and Merlin wasn't going to start complaining. So he sat down across from Gaius and dug quickly in.
It wasn't until much later, when Merlin had spent far too long uninterrupted for it to actually have been possible, that he got suspicious.
Tentatively, he opened the door of his room to find not just Geoffrey but the unicorn keeper Anhora surrounding Gaius and the shiny silver object which was now blaring an annoying (if quite catchy) almost metallic noise. He decided it was quite like the noise a bucket made when you dropped it on the ground repeatedly.
And then they started dancing. In a line. Together. Choreographed.
12. Macarena - Los Del Rio
When I dance they call me Macarena
And the boys they say que so buena
They all want me, they can't have me
So they all come and dance beside me
Move with me, chat with me
And if you're good, I take you home with me
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Que tu cuerpo es pa' darle alegria y cosa buena
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Heeeeey Macarena
Aii!
The jaw of Merlin's mouth had never fallen down so low. They were dancing in some sort of order to the beat and then they... wiggled. And jumped. But all Merlin could focus on was the wiggling appendages at the rear of each man.
His jaw fell shut with a click.
'Urk,' he said for the second time that day.
'Merlin,' Gaius said, welcoming. 'Come join us.'
'N-no,' Merlin replied hastily. 'Thanks, I have to-' but his arm had been snagged by Anhora and he was dragged into line just as Geoffrey set the song back to repeat itself.
'Urk,' he said again, firmly. But when it came down to it, he ended up enjoying himself.
THE END.
(And a refrain from I Get Knocked Down, because it is necessary, to get the Macarena out of your head.)
I Get Knocked Down - Chumbawamba
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
I get knocked down
But I get up again
You're never going to keep me down
If a different file format or upload site is needed, feel free to tell me!
Comments are loooooooooooooooooooved.