fic: Passing Ships into the Night
Characters: Olivia, Peter, John, Charlie
Spoilers: Through the promo for 2.12
Summary: A look at the three men in Olivia's life and how they have affected her.
A/N: Just a little something I wrote today while bored and sick :( also, the idea was nagging at me after seeing the promo for next week's episode. Title is from Be the One by the Fray because I can't stop listening to it today.
On first impressions, he was everything you hated. Overly confident, blonde, always smiling. He had that star of the football team façade that brought back too many memories of high school which lead to other more awful memories, those ones you always tried to forget. The ones you never spoke of to anyone.
And then he was assigned to be your partner.
You were surprised by how easily you instantly got along. Maybe it was because he had the same no bullshit attitude as you. Maybe it was the way he cared when you thought no one else in your job did. Maybe it was the way he put on that façade just to make it through the day. There was something in him that reminded you of you which didn’t make you feel so alone. One day you realized you were in love with him, a huge burst of flame that blazed brightly in the night. But just as soon as it ignited, it was extinguished. He died in your arms, and you realized there was really something to first instincts. He was everything you hated.
And yet, the embers burned on, licking at your heart.
Months later, you learned the truth. And somehow that made it harder because now all that was left was emptiness where hatred once resided. You wondered if you would survive the next fall.
+++
On first impressions, he was a comfort. You had been scared and alone on that day when you had been thrust into action. He had come up to you, this gruff, no nonsense type of man, and he had offered a smile. And from that day forward, he was both of those guys for you, the one who would stand by your side and get the job done, but at the end of the day would set your mind at ease.
You’d never really had a best friend. You were too much of a loner for that, always cut off from the world, not only because of what you’d been through, but because you preferred it that way. After all, if you had no one, you had nothing to lose. But he was your best friend if you had to put a label on it. He even followed you to the Fringe Division, and never once questioned your sanity, although you often did.
In your world of crazy, you thought he was the only thing safe. But when you shot him in the head, and watched the ribbon of blood fall down his face, you knew that nothing in this world was what it seemed, and the one person you thought you could trust the most could turn out to be your worst enemy.
Maybe being a loner was what kept you safe.
+++
On first impressions, he was a pain in the ass. He was sarcastic, biting, an asshole if you really had to put it bluntly. But you needed him; it just wasn’t until later that you realized how much.
You couldn’t deny the way you felt about him, even though you tried. It was something instinctual; it was there from the first day you met. And for someone who wanted all the answers, but now found yourself in a job where there were none, this mystery just seemed like another part of your new life.
What had once been annoyance had quickly faded to friendship, fondness, and though you were reluctant to admit it, the beginnings of love. With John it had been fast, with Charlie it had been easy, with Peter it felt right. And perhaps that was the scariest revelation of all.
In his eyes, you saw understanding and a tinge of affection. It surprised you to hear stories you had bottled up deep inside suddenly roll off your tongue in his presence. In his arms, you found support. You never asked for help, never wanted help, but that didn’t stop him. He seemed to know when you needed it even before you did. You found that the sarcasm that irked you at first was simply the very thing that kept you sane, and when at its best put a smile on your face. Soon it had developed into an easy banter, and as you joked along, you noticed more than once those looks he’d give you when he thought you weren’t looking, a little bit of wonder mixed with desire, and you felt your heart flutter wildly as he flashed you a grin. It was something you hadn’t noticed at first, but you liked the way his eyes lit up when he smiled.
Now if you had to admit to yourself, you liked not being alone.
So it shouldn’t have surprised you when you saw him on the other side of that door. His eyes were pleading with you, a helplessness that you could not comfort because you felt it within yourself. And as you placed your hand on the glass, its coldness punctuating the reality of the situation, you couldn’t keep the tears from surfacing. He placed his hand over yours; so close, and yet so far from connecting. Just like your life.
All alone.