[Gently, she reached out and took the bottle from him, taking a drink before she set it down on the counter behind her. Reaching up, she stroked his face.]
I travel too much for my job, Harvey. You need a girl who can be here for you all the time.
[his brow furrowed and all he could do was scrunch up his nose. he could be a child in this position.] Woman. [he corrected her.] I need a woman. [he moved out of her touch and tried to reach past her for his bottle.] Woman. You. [he whispered as he leaned in for the bottle finally.]
[goddamn her. he sighed heavily and his body sagged forward against hers. if he wasn't like this and hell bent on pushing he'd give in.] No. No you're not. [his words sounded strangely sober for a man who reaked of alcohol.] You know you're not.
[Reaching up, she cupped his face with both hands and kissed him deeply before pulling back.] I want to be here for you, Harvey. I do. I just-- my job. [A whispered confession of her own.] I work for the CIA.
[he wanted so badly to just melt into that kiss and forget that he felt like shit. he really wished he was capable of that right now. he sadly couldn't do it. so when she pulled back he was a little thankful. her voice was soft and if he had been even an inch more away he might have missed it. he heard it and his head jerked back. his face contorted and he wasn't sure why he felt like she had just gutted him. maybe it was the fact that she had lied to him.] No. [that couldn't be right. she was annie walker the smithsonian woman. she was brilliant and gentle. she was not a cia agent.]
[he pulled away. it was human nature to pull away once you had been lied to. this felt worse than the the day he found out cameron dennis had been using him back before he was brought to work for jessica. it cut a little deeper and he wasn't even sure why.] You lied to me. [he backed up, but his drunkenness cause a stumble backwards.]
No. I'm contracted through the Smithsonian. That's not a lie, but I use them as a cover story for the other things I do. [Everyone in Washington has two jobs, right? Right. But she's concerned when he stumbles and she automatically reaches out to steady him.] I wouldn't lie to you or hurt you, Harvey. I care about you too much for that.
[he was hearing her. everything was coming in loud and clear, but he wasn't rational right now. he wasn't rational and in control harvey specter. he wasn't even dressed up and that was saying something.] Well it's probably a little late for that. [she was keeping him vertical which was nice.] Everyone is always lying to me. Jessica lies. Cameron lied to me for years. You lie to me. [his voice had gotten significantly louder by the time he got to her.] I just can't--[can't what harvey?]
Okay. [She understood that he just couldn't. That was fair. It was the same thing her sister had said right before she'd kicked her out. And it was why she'd said she'd let Harvey if she could, but. And now this. She knew it was ridiculous, the sharp pain she felt in her heart, but what she understood was how he couldn't have her around and staying was no longer an option.] I understand. I'll go.
[he lifted both of his hands and rubbed his face roughly. he was trying to sort everything out in his drunk haze. he just didn't understand any of it. he didn't understand why she didn't tell him. if he was sober he would probably understand it better. telling someone you were in the cia was big, but right now to harvey it was nothing. it was a lie.] I put innocent people in prison. [it was abrupt and out of the blue. he really was a self loathing jackass.]
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I travel too much for my job, Harvey. You need a girl who can be here for you all the time.
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Me? [When he was that close, turned her head just enough to kiss his cheek.] If you need me, you can have me. I'm here.
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I'm sorry. Please don't-- Just. Please.
[She needed him to still be there. To still... well, love her for who she was.]
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