lol 5 because c'mon. Best. Ever.probingtimeOctober 3 2011, 19:35:16 UTC
[So yeah about those aliens destroying planet Earth? Not anyone Paul knows. But seriously, could this have no waited until he was off the planet? Seriously?]
[And look, a surviving 'human', currently kicking the tire of a REALLY bitchin' classic car that has, sadly, given up the post-apocalyptic ghost on a highway leading out of California.]
[First there is staring. And then a bright and forcefully peppy] YOU BETCHA! Lemme grab my bags.
[Bernard pops the trunk by remote, grabs some hefty duffles, and -- loads them up in the camper. Two more from the back seat follow, before he comes around and happily loads up into the front seat.]
You're going to want to avoid Nevada, if you're going east. Where it's not infested, there are roaming bands of bandits picking off anybody who comes too close for supplies.
[Well, that was easy. He might be sneaking glances with the most vivid set of green eyes known on this planet, but he's... remarkably calm as he digs in his smallest bag, the messenger one around his shoulder for something.]
[Well, far be it from Paul to complain about the guy not fainting. He's busy trying to watch the road, because.... well. He's still not the universe's greatest driver, and he probably shouldn't be driving this thing anyway but at the moment, it's not like there's much in the way of anyone to pull him over.]
Avoid Nevada, got it. I don't think that'll be a problem.
Well, I wasn't going to let them get my car, was I? [To Bernard, this is the most obvious thing ever.] The cloak wasn't working with no antimatter, but it's not like they couldn't have reverse engineered it, and we can't have that! They already have enough technology without handing them cloaking on a silver platter.
Then we'll have jerk aliens ruining everything while invisible. I mean, that'd just be aggravating. More aggravating than the whole drop pods and slathering demands for resources and women and surrender.
Antimatter? Cloaking technology? Dude. [Have a sideways glance, "Bernard".] I know I've been away a while, but that does not sound like any Earth technology I've ever heard of.
[He touches his watch, turning it's face just a titch; and the hardlight interface fades, leaving Megamind in all his awkward glory sitting there, a heavy metal hitchhiker.]
I just didn't -- you know -- this is a bit new for me since .... well... I'm pretty used to being one of two aliens ever on the planet.
[Right, okay. Blue guy. Huge head. (He likes the huge head. So much more aesthetically pleasing than a tiny human head.) Outfit that looks like it belong at some kind of BDSM convention.]
[As socially stunted as Graeme or Clive were, they have nothing on Megamind.]
Megamind. Once, criminal mastermind, then defender of Metro City, [Still pronouncing it 'metrosity'], and currently, the guy trying to get to the love of his life before the bad guys do.
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[You'll give a dude a ride, Paul?]
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Hey man. Need a lift? [He just... hopes they can skip over the whole fainting-oh-my-god-you're-an-alien thing.]
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[Bernard pops the trunk by remote, grabs some hefty duffles, and -- loads them up in the camper. Two more from the back seat follow, before he comes around and happily loads up into the front seat.]
You're going to want to avoid Nevada, if you're going east. Where it's not infested, there are roaming bands of bandits picking off anybody who comes too close for supplies.
[Well, that was easy. He might be sneaking glances with the most vivid set of green eyes known on this planet, but he's... remarkably calm as he digs in his smallest bag, the messenger one around his shoulder for something.]
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Avoid Nevada, got it. I don't think that'll be a problem.
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[It's a detonator.]
[As in, to a bomb.]
[The big red button is pressed, and behind them, that classic car goes up in a ball of flame that sends smoke up ward in a black, tarry pillar.]
Welp, so much for THAT. Should have known it'd never take the trip. Not enough fuel reserves after the antimatter block got cracked.
Man, I really liked that car.
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The hell was that?
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Then we'll have jerk aliens ruining everything while invisible. I mean, that'd just be aggravating. More aggravating than the whole drop pods and slathering demands for resources and women and surrender.
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Antimatter? Cloaking technology? Dude. [Have a sideways glance, "Bernard".] I know I've been away a while, but that does not sound like any Earth technology I've ever heard of.
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I'm an inventor.
I invent things.
Sometimes they're pretty wild.
[A beat.]
I'm going to guess you've never been to Metro City.
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[He touches his watch, turning it's face just a titch; and the hardlight interface fades, leaving Megamind in all his awkward glory sitting there, a heavy metal hitchhiker.]
I just didn't -- you know -- this is a bit new for me since .... well... I'm pretty used to being one of two aliens ever on the planet.
Suddenly got really crowded.
Not to mention, hostile.
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You're telling me. [Pause.] I'm Paul, by the way.
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[As socially stunted as Graeme or Clive were, they have nothing on Megamind.]
Megamind. Once, criminal mastermind, then defender of Metro City, [Still pronouncing it 'metrosity'], and currently, the guy trying to get to the love of his life before the bad guys do.
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Megamind? Seriously?
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