[Guriel flinches. Is this a test? Is that a trick question? Is the American going to tell his Master what Guriel says?
. . . no. No, that's stupid. What a stupid thing to think. But he must be up to something, right?
Unless he's just kind. But kindness has been thin on the ground for a long time, nobody who'd lived through what he's watched the American live through could possibly have any kindness left in them. And even if he did, somehow . . . even the kindest humans still don't set angels free. Not even if they promise . . .
Don't. Don't think about that. Don't you think about that. Guriel takes an unsteady breath and shakes his head, barely.] No. No. I can't.
[Does he mean can't go back to Sharjhan, or can't do what he wants?
Oh. [He frowns a little.] So what're you gonna do? Do you know? [He bares a fang.] I wouldn't mind taking some of that out of those bastards' hides. They're not the only ones who can play guerrilla warrior. [There's a silent invitation there.]
[Guriel hunches into himself. Raise his hand against a human? Actually, actively hunt and hurt and kill them?
. . . no. It's worse than unthinkable. Not just because of the punishment it will bring down on him, but because it violates his very nature.
That's what They made him do. No matter how much he hates them, he's not going to choose to do it of his own will. He doesn't even realize that he's shaking his head, frantically, fearfully, clutching the ring to his chest.]
[And that reaction has Ben blinking. He's a warrior through and through and would love to go back to that cave system and just... blow it up. With all the insurgents inside. After what they did to Prissy, making him watch...
There's no mercy left in him for something like that.
But apparently angels are different. And that's okay, he thinks.] Hey. Hey, it's all right, you don't have to, you don't have to do anything you don't want anymore, okay? You're free now. You don't even have to... stay.
I mean, I'd like it if you could at least get me back to some Americans. With clothes. But you don't have to.
[Guriel flinches, forces himself to stop shaking his head. His grip on the ring is so convulsively tight it's starting to cut into his hand. And, okay, he really wasn't prepared to deal with this mentally, but apparently he's going to have to.]
[Ben stares in honest confusion.] A trick? Wha--? No, for God's sake. You saved my life and got me the fuck outta there. That'd be a filthy way to repay you. Said you're free. Meant it.
And if you don't want payback on that sonofabitch, well. [Ben bares fangs in a wholly unpleasant expression.] I'll pay him back enough for both of us.
[An unseen demon is suddenly standing there, cackling in Guriel's ear. "Lookit him, little brother. Former Guardian. Wrath billowing off him in waves. He's naked and unarmed and talking about walking back into that place and taking vengeance. Gotta admire his spirit." It grins toothily. "Of course, it'll get him killed. And then, he's ours. Forever. Because Daddy won't give him a pass on one of the Seven Deadlies.
[Guriel shakes his head, resisting the urge to reach up and cover his ears like a petulant child.] Can't, you can't go back there. He'll kill you, or he'll catch you and put you in the cage again. He's stronger and crueler than anyone in this valley, he'll find you if you don't run. He always gets what he wants.
[Why does Guriel care? Does he care, even? Or is he just afraid that if the American gets caught again he will, too?]
Those hills will hide me as well as it hides them. I can set up with a rifle two hundred yards from that cave, he'll never even see me. [coldly] Two in his ten-ring with a pair of 7.62 millimeter rounds, and he won't be a problem to anyone ever again.
["Ooooh, cubby, lookit the Wrath boiling off him in waves. It smells delicious." The demon rubs its hands together. "He's going to be fun to play with."
Ben eyes the angel.] You don't have to stay with me if you don't want to. You're free now. I meant that.
Shut up, shut up . . . [Guriel hunches into himself, protecting the ring for all he's worth, torn apart by too many reactions. Fear and guilt and hatred and apathy, and once a long time ago he promised . . .
It doesn't matter what happened a long time ago, it doesn't matter who he used to be or what he promised. Just who he is. Just a lost, lone angelus with no Master, no family, no clue of what to do next.]
[Ben holds his hands out.] Okay. Okay. I'm gonna-- [He makes a gesture toward the water.] Get cleaned up. And then figure out what to do about clothes. Maybe just wolf until I can find some of my people...
[And Guriel puts his head down on his knees and wraps his good wing around himself, squeezing his eyes shut. Trying not to think about home (except it's not home any more, everyone you loved is dead and there's nothing left but graves and broken promises . . .) or about Home or about what he's going to do now. Trying to ignore the demon until it goes away. Trying not to dwell on broken promises and trying not to imagine how satisfying it would be to see his Master (Babi, please, why would you do this please . . .) die for the monstrous things he's done.
This is too much, he can't do this, he's just Guriel. There's no structure, nobody to tell him what to do, even at its worst at least slavery gave him that much. This? This is terrifying.]
[Ben spends a goodly amount of time in the water, because oh, God, it feels so fucking good to just be clean again. He scrubs his skin with sand to get the blood off and rubs his nails through his over-long hair, wishing he had some shampoo. This will have to do until he finds some semblance of civilization, however.
He doesn't want to come out, but he has to eventually, because the water is actually damned cold. He shakes his hair and his arms and his legs, almost wolfish even in human form. Eyeing the angel, huddled in a knot of misery, he sits on a rock not too far from him, in the sun.]
[Guriel flinches away from him, shifting the crippled right wing to offer him what meager protection it can. His voice comes out thin and reedy and reluctant, but the Master (Babi) taught him the hard way what happens if you don't answer a human's questions.] Yes.
[Ben nods and scrubs his fingers through his drying hair. It's all catching up to him, and he's a little overwhelmed himself. God, he wants some clothes.] Wish I knew how to make it easier on you. [His mouth twists, and he gazes off into the distance instead of looking at the angel.] I'm... not doing so hot myself, though, so... sorry?
Guriel. I'm Guriel. [He makes an effort and raises his head, although he keeps his wings wrapped tight around himself and his hand wrapped around his ring. He takes a deep breath.]
Again.]
Oh, God, just let me die...
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. . . no. No, that's stupid. What a stupid thing to think. But he must be up to something, right?
Unless he's just kind. But kindness has been thin on the ground for a long time, nobody who'd lived through what he's watched the American live through could possibly have any kindness left in them. And even if he did, somehow . . . even the kindest humans still don't set angels free. Not even if they promise . . .
Don't. Don't think about that. Don't you think about that. Guriel takes an unsteady breath and shakes his head, barely.] No. No. I can't.
[Does he mean can't go back to Sharjhan, or can't do what he wants?
. . . well. Yes.]
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. . . no. It's worse than unthinkable. Not just because of the punishment it will bring down on him, but because it violates his very nature.
That's what They made him do. No matter how much he hates them, he's not going to choose to do it of his own will. He doesn't even realize that he's shaking his head, frantically, fearfully, clutching the ring to his chest.]
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There's no mercy left in him for something like that.
But apparently angels are different. And that's okay, he thinks.] Hey. Hey, it's all right, you don't have to, you don't have to do anything you don't want anymore, okay? You're free now. You don't even have to... stay.
I mean, I'd like it if you could at least get me back to some Americans. With clothes. But you don't have to.
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. . . do you mean it? It's not a . . . a trick?
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And if you don't want payback on that sonofabitch, well. [Ben bares fangs in a wholly unpleasant expression.] I'll pay him back enough for both of us.
[An unseen demon is suddenly standing there, cackling in Guriel's ear. "Lookit him, little brother. Former Guardian. Wrath billowing off him in waves. He's naked and unarmed and talking about walking back into that place and taking vengeance. Gotta admire his spirit." It grins toothily. "Of course, it'll get him killed. And then, he's ours. Forever. Because Daddy won't give him a pass on one of the Seven Deadlies.
Even though he freed you. Shame, really."]
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[Why does Guriel care? Does he care, even? Or is he just afraid that if the American gets caught again he will, too?]
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["Ooooh, cubby, lookit the Wrath boiling off him in waves. It smells delicious." The demon rubs its hands together. "He's going to be fun to play with."
Ben eyes the angel.] You don't have to stay with me if you don't want to. You're free now. I meant that.
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It doesn't matter what happened a long time ago, it doesn't matter who he used to be or what he promised. Just who he is. Just a lost, lone angelus with no Master, no family, no clue of what to do next.]
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I'll, uh. [And he heads to the oasis.]
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This is too much, he can't do this, he's just Guriel. There's no structure, nobody to tell him what to do, even at its worst at least slavery gave him that much. This? This is terrifying.]
Please. Someone, Abba, please . . .
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He doesn't want to come out, but he has to eventually, because the water is actually damned cold. He shakes his hair and his arms and his legs, almost wolfish even in human form. Eyeing the angel, huddled in a knot of misery, he sits on a rock not too far from him, in the sun.]
Little overwhelmed?
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I'm Ben. I never caught your name.
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Thank you.
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