The FML meme (no not that one)

[theviithiamiam]

The Fuck -- Marry -- Kill Meme

Comments

Sorry, your "not really the marrying type" thing made me go "CHALLENGE ACCEPTED." XD 2-1

[iced_soldier]

[Bucky's pretty sure he can't remember the last time he was this hungover. He doesn't even notice his bedmate as he rises, holding his aching head. He assesses his surroundings, only to find that the hotel room is absolutely trashed, and Christ, did he barf in the vase of fake flowers?

The room looks exactly how he imagines it'd look if two people had had incredibly drunken sex, beaten the living shit out of each other, and then had sex again. But that's impossible, right? He'd gone to bed alone, hadn't he?]

LOL Oh, dear, Daken's already plotting how to murder his hubby. [Gigglesnort]

[a_bastard_son]

[Daken felt like shit which was fucking phenomenal considering the healing factor pretty much made it impossible for him to get drunk or hungover. But that's kinda what it felt like. His head felt like it was going to pop and he was laying in a puddle of god only knew what congealed something.]

[Being a fairly fastidious soul by nature, Daken immediately shoved away from the congealed goo and ended up falling right off the edge of the bed as his already unsteady equilibrium reeled steadily to the right. He hit the cheap motel carpet with a grunt of pain as he landed right on his tailbone.]

[iced_soldier]

[Bucky's heart may have stopped when he heard that crash and grunt. It also may not have. What he couldn't deny was the way his eyes widened with surprise and horror. He turned back toward the bed to see just who he'd gone to bed with.]

[a_bastard_son]

[Daken blamed his sluggishness and inability to think coherently on the fact that he was hungover. That was the only reason to explain the fact that his fucking hurt and no in the good kind of night before way. The healing factor should have taken care of it but it didn't and even more worrisome was the fact that he couldn't remember a single thing about last night. When the mutant's blood-shot eyes rose to glower over at Bucky, he was just as startled to see the human as Bucky no doubt was surprised to see him.]

[iced_soldier]

[Oh, Bucky was surprised, alright, and all the more surprised when he saw the glint of gold around the man's finger- the only thing he was wearing.] The hell happened last night?

[a_bastard_son]

[Daken immediately grew suspicious and started to put two and two together. Only time he'd felt this shitty was after coming down off of a Heat pills high. It would certainly explain the fucking blackout he had about last night.] Did you drug me>?

[iced_soldier]

Why the fuck would I drug you? I was drunk. [His eyes narrowed suspiciously.] Did you drug me? [And then he noticed the papers sitting on the table- papers that he distinctly didn't remember being there yesterday. He went over to read him and his eyes widened again.] Oh, hell no.

[a_bastard_son]

How about the fact that you have a history of drugging your 'dates'? [Nope, he wasn't letting that shit go anytime soon, Bucky.] I hope it's the hotel bill because this tawdry room definitely looks like your brand of style, Barnes.

[iced_soldier]

Uh...better ammend "date" to "husband." [It was only then that he noticed the ring around his own metal ring finger. The fuck? He must've been drunk to put the ring on his metal hand- even if that was the proper ring finger. He also must've been drunk to get married, to anyone, much less this man. He handed over the paper, still staring at his ring in disbelief. This couldn't be happening.]

[a_bastard_son]

Excuse me? [For once, genuine startlement filled the mutant's voice as he snatched the paper away from Bucky. A frown beetled his brow as he scanned the paper with growing disbelief.] Even for you this is a distasteful joke, Barnes. [Of course his first reaction was suspicion and disbelief.]

[iced_soldier]

Jesus Christ! Why would I even joke about marryin' ya?

[a_bastard_son]

Because you're an extremely mentally disturbed person? [Daken crumpled the 'marriage license' up into a little ball and looked down at his hand which did indeed have a freaking gold band wrapped around the ring finger.] This is ridiculous.

Putting Bucky in a dress is apparently my new favorite thing. XD

[iced_soldier]

Like you're one to talk, sweetheart. [Huh. Maybe he shouldn't call the man "sweetheart" anymore. It might have a different implication, now that they might be married. Were probably married. Okay, they were married, but Bucky was still disbelieving.

Just like he was disbelieving when he saw the crumpled wedding dress in the corner.]

Oh, for fuck's sake! You better've been the one in the dress.

You're a horrible person. XD And Daken approves.

[a_bastard_son]

[His head hurt too much for this shit. Growling under his breath, the mutant stalked back over to the bed he'd fallen out of in search of the clothes he'd been wearing last night but all he found were the tattered and bloody remains of an honest to god purple suit laying crumpled by the bedside.] Where are my fucking clothes? [As he dug through the pile of clothes, a photo fell out of the inside pocket of the suit and with a sinking heart, Daken picked it up.].....this is impossible.

This thread will be the death of me. XD

[iced_soldier]

[He raised one eyebrow.] What's that?

You can't die from laughter, can you? XD

[a_bastard_son]

You must have bought that stress from a stripper surplus outlet mall not that my clothes are much better. [Daken rubbed at his aching forehead and held out the picture to Bucky. Yep, the solider was definitely wearing that hideous tulle monster of a dress and sucking face with Daken in front of the cheap styrofoam stage that would have been at home in any of a dozen quickie Vegas Chapel of Loves.]