489. The Texts From Last Night Meme

[thememesock]

the TEXTS FROM LAST NIGHT meme

Comments

wesley gibson ( wanted - film )

[mostawkward]

[xprofessor]

come pick me up. I don't remember what city this bar is in

[mostawkward]

what the fuck like that's gonna help me. where's your date? why aren't you fucking them somewhere so i don't have to pick you up.

[xprofessor]

you know I haven't seen Erik in weeks. it's the one with the light-up margarita by the door. you've been there before

[mostawkward]

i fucking hate that bar though

[xprofessor]

they're tired of my card trick

[mostawkward]

i could've told you that your goddamn card tricks are fucking lame, but nobody listens to me in this house.

don't fucking move or i'll leave you on a ditch when i find you

[DOOP DOOP DOOP driving. which, considering that it's wesley and he's hideous at driving, being fraternity-trained and all, shouldn't really take him that long.]

[xprofessor]

this gorl wantt to meet you. bring cigarettes

[mostawkward]

jesus fuck you're horrible and you're slandering my name

[ARRIVES THERE LIKE BATMAN. charles where are you. 8| also please don't be wearing your cardigans, there is nothing more tacky than you and your professorly cardigans in a goddamned bar.]

[xprofessor]

[ there is charles, by the bar, with a girl, a girl who is touching her hair and laughing and flirting with him.

He shoots a glance at Wesley, and pulls out his phone yes he is texting right now ]

where are the cigarettes????

[mostawkward]

[flatly;]

Nowhere.

[and he turns to the girl, all sweet smiles and shit, which on wesley, only makes him look like a condescending bitch.]

I'm sorry, it's past his bedtime, sweetie. Better luck next time.

[AND HE BODILY DRAGS CHARLES OUT OF THERE]

[xprofessor]

But she wanted a threesome. She was thinking about two of me all night...

[mostawkward]

For fuck's sake, you don't even know where you are. I rather doubt you'd know where to put your dick when you fuck her either, you're too goddamned drunk for anything.

[moving to wesley's car, which is the shitty car and not charles' souped up bentley.]

If you puke in my car, I will never forgive you. Let me just make that clear right now.

[xprofessor]

If I did, it might improve the smell in here.

[ rollllllling the window down. fresh air yay. ]

I know just where to put my dick, thank you. I also have a suggestion as to where you might put yours.

[mostawkward]

Oh fuck off. [grumblegrumble.] And I will put my dick wherever I want.

[putting on a hideous fake brit accent, just for his bro]

Where would you like to go tonight, Mister Xavier?

[xprofessor]

But you want me. You always do. All the time...

Or at least I do. I sumt. Some. Sometimes get them mixed up.